The Short Life and Tragic Death of The Rock's Puppy, Brutus, Who Is in Heaven
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson announced some horribly sad news Monday night: BRUTUS, the French Bulldog puppy he adopted and subsequently rescued from drowning in his outdoor pool, has died. This news is not baller. It is, in fact, the saddest thing to befall The Rock in the recent history of his joyful, baller-ass life, which he always lives to the fullest.
BRUTUS, who just could not stay out of trouble, got into some poisonous mushrooms while playing outside with his all-caps Frenchie brother, HOBBS, the Rock wrote. And despite the efforts of The Rock and veterinarians to save him, the toxins were too much for BRUTUS’s tiny li’l dog liver to take.
The Rock and his longtime girlfriend and future baby-mama, Lauren Hashian, decided to take BRUTUS off life support after running out of other options.
“You’ll always be my lil main man and rough housing Brute ... #WishICouldHaveSavedYouOneMoreTime,” The Rock wrote on Instagram, in perhaps the only recorded instance of a hashtag eliciting genuine human feelings of sadness and loss. Even ballers gotta cry sometimes.
BRUTUS spent his short life “wrestling and biting the shit outta my hands and happily peeing on my Jordans,” the Rock wrote in an earlier Instagram post. Now BRUTUS is in Heaven, peeing on God’s Jordans with the other angels.
BRUTUS is survived by HOBBS, the one who knows how to swim. Please take good care of him, The Rock.