Chelsea Handler's ongoing quest to keep a photo of her bare nipples up on Instagram hasn't been successful so far, so she decided to tackle something a little easier—the Middle East peace process. Her latest topless photo, shot on a trip to Jerusalem, has her posing topless on a camel while wearing Israeli flag pasties.
Your mean neighbor, Chelsea Handler, regaled the story of pale oaf Jason Biggs peeing on her face as she clung to boat in the heavy tide of the ocean. "I was trapped. I was in a urinary Bermuda Triangle," she said on Conan last night.
The summer's increased lightning strike injuries first tipped you off, then you began to smell it in the air. "Could it be..." you allowed yourself to wonder briefly. "No, no. No, it couldn't." Well, I hope rather than scare you this news brings you a bit of relief—relief that you haven't been imagining it after all. Your mind is trustworthy. Your gut is true. Chelsea Handler is building a clique of power women. (Reportedly.)
Chelsea Handler, despite being mostly horrible, was a frequently named potential replacement for David Letterman. But with Stephen Colbert quickly securing that gig, Handler (and others) will have to shoot for the slot currently occupied by Craig Ferguson. Her interest in The Late Late Show is unknown, but she's certainly winking at our speculation.