Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is urging Kabbalah Centre head Philip Berg to yank Madonna out on the street by her red string bracelet. "Yes, she may sing and she may dance. But she is famous for being a slut. Is the Kabbalah Center really so desperate that it is prepared to promote itself through a vulgarian whose main contribution to the culture is porn rock?"

Does the rabbi really want to upset the delicate balance in the Kabbalah Centre's economy? They may have to shutter their doors if they lose the vital revenue from selling Madonna's retardation-inducing children's book. And the Kabbalah Centre without Madonna...God, that's like having the Scientology Celebrity Centre without the teeming struggling actor drones dressed like the world's creepiest navy.

• MADONNA'S EASY PRAY [Mirror]

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