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ephemera
Spinning Off Into Nothing
Dead man walking. Rather, Dead 80's Blonde Spinoff Girl walking. Tonight's Gossip Girl features a look back at the youth of Lily van der Woodsen, and sets up a new spinoff. Except, show's not happening. More » -
trade roundup
Freddy Krueger To Kill Black CW Sitcoms In Their Sleep
The return of Freddy Krueger. The sad remaining of Chace Crawford. Christina Ricci books a porn movie, The Hangover goes out on the town again, and The Game hopes to keep playing. More » -
trade roundup
'Idol' Won't Fear The 'Reaper'
· Reaper Season Two will begin earlier than expected: It airs Tuesdays at 8, where it will fend off the Idol dragon, while princess 90210 is shuffled off to the safety of 9 p.m. [THR] More » -
feuds
TV Guide Takes Active Steps To Imagine A World Without 'Bromance'
Back when everyone in America was doing coke and playing Galaga, TV Guide was the only game in town for television schedules. Now, we all have set-top boxes, and TV Guide is pissed. More » -
trade roundup
The CW Admits They Should Probably Make Their Own Shows
· The CW dumped its Sunday night Media Rights Capital time buy, an experiment in third-party programming gone awry. From now on, all their schedule outsourcing will go to tween drama factories in India, with Rumor-Mongering Child Goddess and Maa Tujhhe Salaam 813223 set to premiere mid-January. [Variety] More » -
Defamer PlagueWatch
Throat-Eating Killer Bacteria Nearly Claims Life Of 'Gossip Girl's Taylor Momsen!
We bring now distressing news from the set of Gossip Girl, where 15-year-old Taylor Momsen—who plays Jennie, the fashion-designing little sister eager to break free from her humble roots living in a finished loft in Brooklyn with her dad from Everclear—has survived a brush with a "potentially life-threatening" (italics, underline, and bold ours) throat infection. Her doctor wisely chose Us to offer his prognosis exclusive: More » -
trade roundup
'Iron Man 2': Howard Out, Cheadle In
· Don Cheadle will replace Terrence Howard in Iron Man 2, whose deal with Marvel fell through over "financial differences." Perhaps it came down to salary, but we're pretty sure Marvel wasn't so hot on the stipulation that Howard's Seal/Heidi Klum song become the sequel's "official love theme." [THR] More » -
90210
'90210': The Father of Kelly's 'Splash-Off' Revealed!
It was the question that had all of America's small, CW-watching audience in its thrall for about a week, tops: who is the father of Kelly's baby on 90210? Sure, Canada took great pains to give away the show's secret, but for spoiler-avoiding true patriots, last night's episode finally revealed the babydaddy behind Beverly Hills's most famous "splash-off". More » -
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gossip girl
Though rumors continue that the CW may not outlive May sweeps, last night's ratings provided a bit of good news for the network: Gossip Girl, which has never managed to translate its huge New York media buzz into actual nationwide ratings, earned its highest numbers ever (3.7 million viewers), and along with One Tree Hill, contributed to the best Monday night in CW history. Does the 11% boost in viewers from Gossip's past two episodes bode well for a possible 90210 resurgence tonight, since the latter drama saw its numbers fall in its second outing? We'll know tomorrow whether all the babydaddy drama has paid off, or if the show's continued slide in the ratings will presage an emergency rescue from one very hirsute West Bev alum. [THR] -
america's next top model
The CW's New Shows Are Lacking In Color
When I heard that there was going to be a black kid on the new 90210, I celebrated for about three seconds. Then I read that he was adopted. What a fucking cop out. It's been 18 years since The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air, 24 years since The Cosby Show and 33 years since The Jeffersons. Why can't there be a black kid living in an affluent neighborhood who has his own money? Or has ONE rich black parent? A lawyer, doctor, politician, sports star, rapper, something? Because, thanks to The OC, Laguna Beach, The Hills, and Gossip Girl, it's not like we don't see enough wealthy young white people in primetime. [Jezebel] -
jason priestley
Who Needs '90210' With This Lucrative Gig Impersonating Zach Galifianakis?
While the record-breaking premiere of 90210 has left certain stars smiling (and smiling, and smiling), some of the franchise's original cast members have better things to do than stand around and flash those pearly whites for a measly 12 share. Take Jason Priestley, for example, who showed up to Nike's 10k Global Human Race in Los Angeles this week with his teen-dream sideburns upstaged by a massive, world-beating beard. Looking less like Brandon Walsh and more like the homeless man Brandon Walsh invited to Thanksgiving, Priestly was also kind enough to share his curt thoughts on the CW re-do: More » -
beverly hills 90210
'90210' Stars Jennie and Shannen: Ladies Don't Punch, They Scratch
Despite the fact that Jennie Garth is still taunting Shannen Doherty with expertly crafted put-downs, EW was able to wrangle the two 90210 stars for an arm-in-arm photo shoot and revealing Q&A. In it, Doherty reveals that she never really liked Brenda Walsh ("They just took her in a really odd direction that I didn't necessarily agree with at the time") and that she still harbors insecurities begun by the seminal "I Hate Brenda" newsletter. All well and good, but what about the matter everyone still cares about: the long-rumored Doherty/Garth catfights? More » -
beverly hills 90210
9021-Uh Oh! Bad news for television critics accustomed to reviewing fall TV shows early: according to Variety, the CW will not be sending out any advance screeners of its highly anticipated 90210 pilot. "We're not hiding anything," says the network in a statement, "simply keeping a lid on 90210 until 9.02 [ed. note: see what they did there?], riding the curiosity and anticipation into premiere night, and letting all our constituents see it at the same time." Is the CW covering something up, or are they just following an increasingly critic-hostile trend? We'll give them a pass today, if only because they've finally released a photo of Jessica Walter (holding a drink!) as Lucille Bluth...we mean, "Tabitha." [Variety] -
90210
Original '90210' Alumni Report: Checking In With Kelly, David and Nat
There hasn't been a show as hotly anticipated as the 90210 revamp since last year's Knight Rider. (You heard me.) And as we wait with bated breath wondering about the casting fate of teen counseling sensation and all around Losing My Religion-loving Brenda, let's catch up with some former cast members to see how life is treating them. More » -
beverly hills 90210
With Brenda Back And Donna Out, Which '90210' Alums Are Officially Returning To The Peach Pit?
The upcoming remake of Beverly Hills: 90210 is continuing the process of putting its out-of-work alumni back in business. Spurned by producers for just being her normal bratty self back in 1994, Shannen Doherty is reportedly in talks to join Jennie Garth and return the characters that launched each of them into the zeitgeist back in the early `90s. But despite Shannen and Jennie's overenthusiastic acknowledgment that they’ve got nothing better to do, not every cast member is so eager to pull the trigger and willingly euthanize their own careers. Which stars are only contributing to the remake in off-screen roles, and which are phoning in Hell Nos from Italy as they shoot far more important Hallmark Channel movies, after the jump. More » -
trade roundup
Clooney Sells Showtime On A Suicide Comedy
· George Clooney's production company Smoke House has set up a pilot at Showtime called The Fall of Bob, a comedy about a guy whose life flashes before his eyes as he jumps off a building. We bet we know how the series finale ends! [Variety] More » -
short ends
Farmer Wants A Wife, Not A Toilet-Mouth
· Last night's Farmer Wants a Wife—which we're told actually exists and is not an elaborate 30 Rock joke—was the most! shocking! ever!, as contestant Ashley, a "catering sales manager," dropped a few f-bombs on the lonely Missouri field worker. (Who, it bears mentioning, we're almost positive we saw go-go dancing in nothing but a tuxSpeedo at last night's gay marriage rally at The Abbey). [The CW] More » -
defamer
Network Death Watch Underway as Viewers, Advertisers Flee the CW
Teenagers fucking does not a network make, or so the CW is grudgingly realizing as its ratings plummet to a point where even The Wall Street Journal can't help but scoop the world on its obituary. To wit: Nearly 28% of its target 18-34 demo has disappeared this season! Ratings are down 22% during May sweeps! Young viewers are flocking to the Web! "Writers strike" this, "skittish advertisers" that, co-owners CBS and WB are ready to drop their joint endeavor faster than a pair of Gossip Girl heroine Serena van der Woodsen's panties, etc. etc. In short: Divest all ye sinners, the end is nigh — as in "a year" nigh, give or take a month or two. More » -
upfronts
The '90210' Mills Vs. 'Arrested' Bluths: Bound By Their Drunk Grandmother
The CW's upfront presentation—actually a press release from network president Dawn Ostroff, upon which no expense was spared—announced that the flailing bastard network had finally "zeroed in on our target demo" (young women, 18-34), and would therefore spend the rest of their existence slavishly catering to their newly identified audience's whims and needs. Another season of Mr. and Mrs. Jay enacting their high-fashion minstrel show up and down the deck of the USS Nimitz while deployed to the Persian Gulf? You got it. A two-hour special with limited commercial interruption brought to you by Axe Body Spray, entitled, Chace Crawford: Shirtless? Coming right up. Less lucky: Aliens in America, Life is Wild, The Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious, and Beauty and the Geek, who were all dropped faster than an 8th grader wipes her former best friend from her myFaves after finding out she blabbed about her yeast infection to the rest of their backup-dancing class. More » -
defamer
It's A Network Pickup Orgy!
· Fox has picked up J.J. Abrams's Fringe, about a female FBI agent who "tackles unexplained medical and scientific phenomena," and Joss Whedon's Dollhouse, both for mid-season debuts meant to be bolstered by American Idol's return, an effect Fox internally refers to as "the Drunk-Paula Boost." [Variety] More » -
defamer
The 'Gossip Girl' OMFG Promo. Sweded.
You're likely familiar with the work of Sam Rubin—KTLA entertainment reporter, World's Biggest Chace Crawford fan (sorry, JC), and, on paper at least, a grown man—whose motor-mouthed showbiz punditry becomes even more red-faced and spittle-flecked when the subject turns to anything Gossip Girl. (The greatest show ever! Just ask the writers of this New York cover story we won't be caught dead reading!) With the show's second-season premiere airing tonight, Rubin unveiled his own Sweded take on the middling teen soap's overtly sexual OMFG marketing campaign. More » -
defamer
Is Tyra Banks Ready To Tell 'Top Model' To Kiss. Her. Fat. Ass?
In a stunning development that could throw into jeopardy the jobs of millions of blue collar Americans working in the top-model-refining industry, Tyra Banks may have finally had it with the reality TV competition that effectively launched her star, OK! magazine reports. Things have reportedly gotten "so bad" on the set between Tyra and photo-shoot taskmaster Mr. Jay (who—little known fact—can control the weather by merely rolling back his eyeballs!) that the two "aren't speaking." Even more disturbing, Tyra "only wants to show up on judging day," waiting for the camera's red light to come on before phoning in trademark advice like, "There's a big difference between [wild-eyed facial expression] and [totally fierce facial expression]." More » -
defamer
Defamer Exclusive: JC Chasez And Chace Crawford's Cabana Rendezvous...With Photo!
Chace Crawford, the Gossip Girl star so pretty that one bat of his lashes is enough to instantly knock crowds of his tweenage fanbase clear unconscious, has been linked quite a bit lately to former NSYNC member JC Chasez. Not even a suspiciously timed and worded Page Six item describing the actor as being "surrounded by women" seemed to quell the rumors regarding these frequent bunk buddies. Now, via cameraphone-equipped operative, we bring you this latest addition to the Defamer Citizen Paparazzi files. It's an eyewitness account of what Chase and J.C. (can we just give them a celebrity couple's name already? Chésee it is!) were up to over this unseasonably warm L.A. weekend: More » -
like a virgin
Tori Spelling Will Work For Lunch At The Peach Pit
News that The CW would be shooting the pilot for a Beverly Hills 90210 spinoff was undoubtedly met with conflicted feelings by the sporadically employed cast of the original series, even going so far as to cause Ian Ziering to wake up repeatedly in cold night sweats, shouting into the darkness, "But will they remain true to the original show's vision of eight best friends who pledge over countless lunches at The Peach Pit to remain together, through thick and thin, whatever life throws at them?!" More » -
defamer
Meet The Mills: Analyzing The '90210' Spinoff Breakdowns
Stumbling, bastard network The CW is reaching back for inspiration—all the way back to teen drama prehistory, that magical moment when single-celled organisms of privilege sprouted legs, slithered onto the Malibu shore, and eventually stood upright to become the cast of Beverly Hills 90210. There they flourished, living by the harsh natural law of survival of the tannest, and shopping and fucking the prime years of their lives away, with only the occasional rape and meth addiction to slow down the evolutionary process. Would lighting strike twice? That certainly is what The CW is hoping with its 90210 spinoff series. Variety has gotten their hands on the casting breakdown for a show centering around "the Mills family," who relocate from St. Louis to the titular postal service area. The primary players: More » -
defamer
'One Tree Hill' Makes It To 100 Episodes You Haven't Seen
· One Tree Hill celebrates its 100th episode with a very special one in which Chad Michael Murray slips into autopilot while secretly fantasizing to himself about how nice it would be to break free of The CW ghetto for the feature movie career he so richly deserves. [Variety] More » -
trade roundup
Keeping Up With The Lohanians
· It's official! E! has picked up eight episodes of Living Lohan, a realitainment showcasing the highs and lows of everyone's favorite momabler, Dina Lohan, as she moves the family from Long Island to Las Vegas for little Ali's career. Ali records an album, the two live in a suite at the Palms (coincidentally owned by exec producer Phil Maloof), and we get a shattering glimpse into the heart of momabling darkness. Be afraid. [Variety] More » -
defamer
The Day The CW Laughter Died
Bastard toddler network The CW has had a bit of a rough time rebounding after the writers strike, its slate failing to find traction with an audience comprised almost entirely of easily distracted tweenagers and confused elderly disappointed to learn they hadn't found a new home for Hee Haw reruns. Six of their series recently learned they had been spared the guillotine, including the always-dependable America's Next Top Model, the under-performing Gossip Girl, and the hanging-by-a-thread Everybody Hates Chris; sadly, however the same could not be said for 25 ill-fated staffers just handed their pink slips—curiously enough, printed on the netlet's branded green. From Variety: More » -
trade roundup
The Emmys Didn't Totally Ignore 'Studio 60'
· While underappreciated Aaron Sorkin masterwork Studio 60 was not, as we falsely represented earlier, a nominee for the Best Drama Emmy, the show did pull in a respectable five nods, including one for Eli Wallach in the role of Blacklisted, Alzheimer's Afflicted Writer Who Tries to Steal a Photograph That Has Meaning to Him. [Variety] More » -
trade roundup
Upfronts Afterthoughts: The CW Will Also Feature New Shows This Fall
· Oh, right: The CW also announced its Fall schedule. Veronica Mars fans, grab your pitchforks and torches, because your favorite show's not on it. But maybe the pick-up of Gossip Girl will make you feel better about things? [Variety] More » -
trade roundup
Second Prize Is a Set of Steak Knives. Third Prize Is You Get Tim Allen In Your Martial Arts Movie
· Tim Allen? David Mamet? Together on a "mixed martial arts drama"? Has the world gone totally fucking insane? [Variety] More » -
defamer
'Gilmore Girls' Finally Silenced
· Rory and Lorelai will banter adorably no more forever: The CW announces that Gilmore Girls will air its final episode on May 15. We're not too sad, as we're sure the network has alternative MILF-related programming ready to take its place in the Fall. [Variety] More » -
defamer
Network Execs' Dart-Throwing Technique Leads To Unexpected Employment Windfall For Lee Majors
The LAT takes a look at the roughly 12,000 network pilots currently in development, trying to make sense of any trends that emerged from last season. What we know: Serialized storytelling is out, except when it's in; viewers love a heavy dose of lighthearted quirk with their hour-long, fashion-centric dramas; and the public's appetite for the plight of fundamentalist Christian sketch comedy actresses was vastly overestimated. There is also the predicament of the half-hour primetime comedy, a languishing format that can only claim Charlie Sheen paycheck-generator Two and a Half Men as its single entry in the Nielsen top 20. It's a problem executives have approached with the kind of no-fail solution that results in a grab-bag pilot crop littered with Geico Cavemen shows and Lee Majors's triumphant return to TV: Greenlight everything and hope someone laughs. More » -
defamer
Shows You Probably Haven't Watched Go Down In Network Slaughter
In what Var has dubbed Bloody Monday, but which we will counterdub Mercy-Killing Monday to emphasize the networks' compassionate desire to euthanize a handful of shows languishing in a Nielsen coma from which they are unlikely to ever awaken, Fox's The Wedding Bells, ABC's Six Degrees, The CW's 7th Heaven, and NBC's The Black Donnellys have all entered different phases of the always complex cancellation process. This morning, heavy-handed Donelleys creator Paul Haggis is using his pair of stolen Oscars to wipe away the tears he's shedding over the loss of his primetime baby, his pain compounded by Var's swift kick to the gut during this moment of vulnerability: More » -
trade roundup
Trade Round-Up: Leo And Marty Getting Together. Again.
· Pretty boy shingle fight! Warner Bros. and Leonardo DiCaprio's Appian Way defeat Paramount and Brad Pitt's Plan B for the rights to adapt upcoming autobiography The Wolf of Wall Street. The resulting project will allow for the continued collaboration of muse DiCaprio and master Martin Scorsese (is this whole thing creepy yet? Sort of, right?) at an undisclosed future point in the director's busy schedule. [Variety] More » -
defamer
Trade Round-Up: Screener Pirates Subdued; Hollywood Temporarily Safe From Financial Ruin
Two people have been arrested for stealing an Academy member's awards screeners and illegally posting them online. The DA has yet to file charges, but is expected to ultimately deny the MPAA's request that the pirates be summarily stabbed in the kidneys and left to bleed to death on the sidewalk in front of the Kodak Theatre. [Variety] More » -
trade roundup
Trade Round-Up: Fox Looks Into Feasibility Of Taking Thursday Nights Off For The Rest Of The Season
Fox's post-World Series line-up is battered by all comers, with new sitcoms Til Death and Happy Hour begging to be put out of their Nielsen misery and the The OC bombing in the post-Coop era. And in a result that makes even NBC executives snicker, "Oh, that shit is embarrassing," Fox was beaten by Univision (who had the Latin Grammys) on the night. [Variety] More »













































