Gawker
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defamer
Last Minute 'Borat' Research Suggests Gross Miscalculation In Public's Interest In Seeing Naked Men Wrestle
A giant horsefly has landed in the ointment Borat has been enthusiastically slathering upon his neon-benutslinged body in anticipation of his movie's imminent release: The LAT is reporting that the initial plan of a 2000-screen opening is being scaled back drastically to a not-so-is-nice 800 screens, a tactical move Fox explains away using the kind of creative, textural jargon that trips effortlessly off the tongues of studio suits forced to save face whilst simultaneously massaging the outsized egos of their Kazakh superstars: More »
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11
By SethComment by PBH: Isn't 800 screens kind of subverting the chances of success to begin with? more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Director's Crazy Ideas About Killing Off Samuel L. Jackson Get Him Booted From 'Snakes On A Plane'
When Samuel L. Jackson tried to explain how David R. Ellis came to replace original Snakes on a Plane director Ronny Yu on on The Daily Show before the film's release, he cited Yu's insistence on doing an over-the-top, Hong Kong-inspired version as the reason he left the project. But as it turns out, Yu's ideas on who should be the real star of the movie, its expletive-loving, cobra-strangling hero, or its cabin full of fake-titty-biting reptiles, didn't fly with the studio paying Jackson surviving-to-the-final-credits money. Says The Slug: More »
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By MarkComment by The Gen X Eurotrash Jetsetter Club: Considering how annoying everyone else in the cast was, I think they made a good choice leaving Sam there. However,... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
SnakesInATheaterGate: Hoax Or Cover-Up?
AZCentral.com reports that yesterday's story about the two rattlesnakes allegedly released into a Phoenix theater showing Snakes on a Plane may have been a hoax. According to police, a blog-savvy serpent probably tried to catch a screening on its own to make up its simple, reptilian mind about whether the film's pre-release hype was warranted, and may not have been let loose into the theater by overzealous fans eager to help their fellow moviegoers replicate the claustrophobic terror felt by the fictional passengers of South Pacific Air Flight 121: More » -
snakes on a plane
New Line Enters Second, Deadly Phase Of Its 'Snakes on a Plane' Marketing Plan
Snakes on a Plane's disappointing™ inability to reach the $20 million opening weekend milestone triggered New Line's desperation "Snakes in a Theater" viral marketing campaign, in which a variety of deadly serpents will be released into multiplexes in underperforming regions, building the kind of word-of-mouth buzz that the studio wasn't able to translate from internet obsession into ticket sales. No one was bitten by the two rattlesnakes employed in the campaign's initial run at the AMC Desert Ridge in Phoenix, a misfire that New Line officials blamed on the exhibitor's failure to saturate its popcorn in the snake-provoking pheromones with which it was provided, but promised "six to ten" in-theater fatalities by the film's crucial second-weekend screenings. More » -
snakes on a plane
Snakes On Some Excuses About Unfair Expectations
If you're looking for someone to feel sorry for in the aftermath of Snakes on a Plane's disappointing™ opening weekend, we ask that you look past Samuel L. Jackson, whose Snakes on Two Planes sequel pay raise has been imperiled, or the bloggers who may never again find themselves flown out to fancy Hollywood premieres and handed expensive electronic tokens of appreciation for their viral hitmaking ability, and consider doling out some compassion for New Line's president of distribution, who had to face the media after a disputed $15 million first-place showing: More » -
box office
Monday Morning Box Office: Snakes On A Bomb
There's no point in sugar-coating it, so we'll just come out and say it: The box office numbers don't love you anymore.
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By MarkComment by The Gen X Eurotrash Jetsetter Club: TIME IS TISSUE PEOPLE. Ahh, that movie was so worth two hours of my life. Although my new best friend... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Critics On A 'Snakes On A Plane': A Review Round-Up
As with any self-respecting bad movie, there were no advance press screenings of Snakes on a Plane, so we've had to wait until today to read the reviews. Rotten Tomatoes currently gives it a respectable Tomatometer score of 65%—you wouldn't want any B-horror flick clocking any higher—with a predictable lack of consensus over whether it's so [pick one from column A: good/bad/overhyped] it's [bad/good/overrated]. Here's a round-up of what some of them are saying—and because we are dealing in the always confusing "qualities of badness," we'll also clearly denote whether the reviewer was trying to be positive or negative with their put-downs in each instance: More »
405
By SethComment by drewheyman: "scrawled in white powder on a glass table, or perhaps" doesn't sound that negative to me, sounds like a good... more » | Other threads
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By MarkComment by TrixieBelden: I feel like there's a Malibu Rum joke just waiting to happen on the Mel tip, but I can't seem... more » | Other threads
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By MarkComment by The Gen X Eurotrash Jetsetter Club: I'm just depressed that they're starting shows at 10pm Thursday and I have to wait until Friday night. But still,... more » | Other threads
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madonna
Madonna Finally Finds Way To Hijack 'Snakes On A Plane' Buzz
This afternoon's entertainment news headlines on the CNN.com homepage seem to confirm our fears about the current trajectory of Madonna's career: After half-assedly crucifying herself on a bedazzled cross, a desperate-to-shock Madonna really had nowhere to go but in-flight German scat videos. At least the authorities are keeping tabs on her latest attempt at forced outrageousness. More »
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By MarkComment by Trixie from Toronto: Didn't that happen around the time of the Sex book? I wore the lace and the leggings and knew every... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Dell
You've harassed yourself with the annoying, semi-customizable phone calls, purchased the absurdly expensive jewelry, and are now at a loss about the next step to take in your Snakes on a Plane fandom. Luckily, the marketing department at New Line will leave no promotional opportunity unexploited, and have teamed up with Dell to give you the exciting opportunity to spend $2,000 for a television upon which you may eventually watch director David R. Ellis' DVD featurette admission that nearly all of the film's dialogue was transcribed verbatim from the comment sections of SoaP-obsessed blogs. We're a little disappointed that the studio and the computer manufacturer didn't break new ground in the now-customary realm of product placement, as a climax in which Samuel L. Jackson decides that the only way to get the motherfucking snakes off his motherfucking plane is to detonate a Dell laptop battery and incinerate every last one of the reptilian stowaways seems like a logical extension of the campaign. More » -
snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Motherfucking Press Junket
With just a precious few days left in which to overhype Snakes on a Plane before its release next Friday, New Line gave Samuel L. Jackson a break from reading scripts for pre-recorded, semi-personalized Snakes on a Voicemail™ promotions ("Hello...JACK. My good friend...STACEY...tells me that you'd like to take some time away from your job as an...ACTUARY...to go see my new movie, in theaters August 18th!") to spend some time going over his Snakes-related anecdotes with a reporter from Time. We've selected one in which Jackson claims to prepare just as thoroughly for his The Man-level work as he does for the more challenging roles he takes to momentarily drown out the sound of the cash register cha-ching he hears each time he's offered a part in well-paying, "exuberant crap": More » -
short ends
Short Ends: Snakes On Your Anytime Minutes
· Here's a surefire way to annoy the special Snakes on a Plane fan in your life: Go to this website and send them a "customized" voice greeting (written, we're pretty sure, by an unpaid intern) from Samuel L. Jackson that contains no use of the word "motherfucking" whatsoever. A potentially decent idea very poorly executed—if you're gonna subject someone to a glorified movie commercial starring Jackson, you at least want their ear to bleed from the profanity. More »
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By MarkComment by Bon Jour, Pee Wee: You know the NBC/YouTube site, is a satire site, right? more » | Other threads
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By MarkComment by Assistant/Atlas: SoaP's gonna be less Airplane and more Anaconda, I fear. But between this and Aquaman (the mildly-moronic unaired pilot... more » | Other threads
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short ends
Short Ends: Travolta's Pecs Have Seen Firmer Days
· Don't even pretend to act surprised that Travolta doesn't look good with his shirt off. You saw Pulp Fiction at least a decade ago, didn't you? More »
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By MarkComment by Detective Zito: What the shit, Mark/Seth?... you knowingly post the most intriguing article of the day about a cat in a shirt... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Motherfucking Pricey Piece Of Jewelry
When we tossed off an end-of-day link to this $350 Snakes on a Plane-inspired necklace—designed, incidentally, by a real, live, and credited Snakes on a Plane cast member!—we thought: OK, a bit overpriced, but cute enough. It was soon pointed out to us that we somehow missed the $3,900.00 version (pictured) also on offer at the website, a luxury bauble priced out of the range of pretty much everyone but the foul-mouthed guy who's actually flinging interloping reptiles around the economy class cabin. Diamond-encrusted snakes on an eighteen-carat-gold plane makes us so very, very tired. More »
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By MarkComment by impalpable observer: New Line still owes me $2645.00 or a trip out to the motherfucking premiere. more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Plane: The Music Video
Because we know that New Line will totally call us in the morning if we just put out a little bit (OK, third base at most, and only if they pay for dinner), we are happy to provide this small amount of free advertising to their late summer entertainment-related product, Snakes on a Plane, by posting this 100 percent NON-EXCLUSIVE music video for the movie's official theme song. We must, however, offer this tiny critique: While the song is catchy enough and the idea of the band smuggling its deadly reptilian payload through security by distracting the X-ray tech with cleavage is cute, um....there are no motherfucking snakes on a motherfucking plane. This seems to us like an unacceptable betrayal of trust, given that the whole point of the movie* is to see Samuel L. Jackson draped in albino pythons while struggling to close overhead bins bursting with improperly stowed cobras. If you're not going to show scenes from the movie, give us the band playing a concert in an economy cabin overrun by snakes, or watching in horror as their guitars/drumsticks/the bassist suddenly transmogrify into giant serpents. Don't get cute with the concept now, New Line. You've come too far for that. We all have. More »
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By MarkComment by PrsnlizdPL8s: currently listening to this horrible song on the RADIO for the second time and throwing up a little in my... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Canadian
The Defamer Special Correspondent on Semi-International Movie Promotions filed this brief report (with accompanying photo) on New Line's latest attempt to grow its Snakes on a Plane buzz in Hollywood's Great Northern Backlot: More »
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By MarkComment by Gallant Patsy: Funny that the Izod name is on the seats, but no crocodile... Crocodiles eating Snakes on a Plane, the sequel... more » | Other threads
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employment
Defamer Employment: Shakes On A Booty Train
LA-based electronica duo Captain Ahab (link possibly NSFW, based on how your workplace feels about two shirtless dudes in the throws of Satanic embrace) won New Line's Snakes on a Plane songwriting contest with their catchy ditty, "Snakes On My Brain." (You can hear it at their MySpace page.) The win guaranteed them a spot on the SoaP soundtrack, and, according to a Craiglist posting, a bootylicious video. Seeking generously bottomed lady-types, or, as the ad puts it, "dirty dirty girls who want to shake their asses," the very low-rent (and, we think, no-paying) gig asks the aspiring skanklets to outfit themselves in the finest ho'-wear. Suggestions include: More » -
snakes on a plane
Rude Snakes On A French Plane
Some say that everything sounds better in French, but we have a feeling that when Samuel L. Jackson's pre-approved classic line, "I want these motherfucking snakes off the motherfucking plane!" becomes, "Je ne veux pas ces putains de serpants sur la puriture de l'avion!"* it's going to lose a little something in translation. More »
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By MarkComment by ilparaitque: We confirm (and we are an authority, being french and all) the right translation is "Je veux ces putains de... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Great Moments In Movie Marketing: Actual Snakes On An Actual Plane
In a bold and potentially reckless attempt to expand the early buzz surrounding Snakes on Plane from the internet into the real world, New Line is releasing actual snakes onto actual planes in transit between crucial test markets: More » -
short ends
Short Ends: Snakes Continue To Be On Unexpected Things
· We know we really should resist this lame urge, but we're so weak: Snakes on a Lesbian-Hosted Daytime Talk Show. No, we don't feel good about it, but there you have it. More » -
short ends
Short Ends: Tom Spends Some Quality Time In The Cockpit
· Tom Cruise calls his plane Kiss Me Kate. However, it isn't named for fiancée Katie Holmes, but for his childhood desire to be fake-married to Katherine Hepburn. More » -
short ends
Short Ends: Rats On A Plane: A True Story
· Our brave pal at Gridskipper shares a tale of his terrifying, non-reptile-related attack on his flight out of Los Angeles. We give you: Rats on a Plane. More »
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By MarkComment by Norma Desmond: I am waiting for the sequel: Sharks on a Plane. Yeah, sharks need water, but when has Hollywood... more » | Other threads
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short ends
Short Ends: Snakes on a Plane: The Children's Book
· Richard Scarry and Noa the Boa Constrictor might have a pretty good lawsuit against the Snakes on a Plane folks. More » -
short ends
Short Ends: Did Naomi Campbell Do Something Bad Today?
· We're guessing that Naomi Campbell is going to get the typical slap on the wrist for her misbehavior, probably nothing more severe than a "The More You Know" PSA on NBC informing the public that no matter how much you think your housekeeper's asking for it, going upside her head with a telephone is a bad idea. More »
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By MarkComment by Picka Little, Talka Little: Too bad Naomi can't hook up with Russell Crowe. They both have such an art with telephones. more » | Other threads
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By MarkComment by drewheyman: should you have kinda waited until april fools day to post this? because until april 1, it's really not an... more » | Other threads
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short ends
Short Ends: The 'Snakes on a Plane' Quote Tracker
· Still more SoaP mania: The Snakes on a Plane Quote Tracker is soliciting more fan-generated dialogue that must be included in the movie. Right now it's a little heavy on the Airplane! references and motherfucker jokes, but we bet that'll even out. More »
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By MarkComment by Assistant/Atlas: Speaking of "deliberate misuse of stupid promotional technology"-- when is Defamer getting a Privacywatch Google Map Mashup like the Gawker... more » | Other threads
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snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Plane: The Reshoots
Today's Hollywood Reporter delves into the phenomenon of Snakes on a Plane's still-growing pre-release buzz, which has elevated the once-languishing turnaround project with a "stupid title" to beloved fanboy event movie. In fact, New Line seems so in tune with the internet chatter (amazing that this is the same studio that gave us Virtual Paul Walker going down on his digital wife, isn't it?) that they shot five days of additional footage, which they claim is to push the movie deeper into R-rated territory, but will also include more nods to SoaP's online fanbase: More » -
snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Plane: The Logo
Entertainment Weekly has been granted a first look at the official Snakes on a Plane logo (left, as if you couldn't tell on your own), which director David R. Ellis tells the magazine was based on fan art like the above example submitted by one of our readers back in September. (If you want one that's really similar—if much more psychedelic— take a look at this entry from a recent, brilliant Fark Photoshop contest.) Not that it takes a genius to throw together a couple of snakes and an airliner after the heavy conceptual lifting's already been done by the movie's self-consciously B-flick title, but at least the New Line folks seem to be paying attention to their potential audience, who may abandon their blogs long enough to show up on opening night wearing flight attendant uniforms and covered in rubber cobras. More » -
snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Plane: Trailer-Like Footage Released
It's been over half a year since Samuel L. Jackson issued the famous words that ignited a very special kind of buzz for B-movie masterwork Snakes on a Plane: "You either want to see that, or you don t." More »
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By MarkComment by Bubba Barney: Oh man. I thought the idea was dumb before, but now I actually wanna see it. They should make a... more » | Other threads
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short ends
Short Ends: Sweetin Rising
· A bikini-assisted appearance on E! continues to propel once-forgotten Full House middle child Jodie Sweeten up the horny websearch charts. More »
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By MarkComment by the sightspeed guy: I was wondering what the deal was with little miss Middle Child of Full House. My search got nothing,... more » | Other threads
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short ends
Short Ends: You Are Never Safe From Snakes
· Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the W.C.: Snakes on a Shitter. More » -
snakes on a plane
Snakes On A Plane On A Megaphone
Before our buddy over at Screenhead slipped this link our way, we had never heard the term "megaphone croon." But, like virtually everything we can think of, even this old-timey form can be nudged towards artistic perfection with the application of four little words: Snakes on a Plane. We think we've found the music that must play over the closing credits as outtakes of Samuel L. Jackson clowning with an albino cobra fade in and out. More » -
snakes on a plane
Snakes on a Plane: The Home Version
Look, we're not going to try and sell you on these reader-created pictures* inspired by upcoming reptiles-and-aircraft masterwork Snakes on a Plane. You either want to see them, or you don't. More » -
movies
Hollywood Helps Out: Screening "The Man" For Hurricane Victims
Sometimes Hollywood cares too much: Fresh off a bummer of a premiere for The Man, the producers of the Eugene Levy/Samuel L. Jackson comedy think that a special screening of their movie will help to lift the spirits of the victims of Hurricane Katrina: More »
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