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generations
The Youngs Will Destroy the Hills They Created
And you thought all teens and twentysomethings were shallow wastoids. Turns out they hate The Hills and other muck same as you. At least execs at MTV are hoping that's true, as they've just completely restructured based on that assumption.
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internal memos
Departing MTV Exec's Furtive Wish: I Wanna Be On Broadway!
Brian Graden, a veteran programming executive at youth culture battle-axe MTV, has thrown in the towel after twelve years. In his goodbye memo to staffers, forwarded to us, Graden mentions an as-yet-unexplored dream: To do musical theater. Adorbs. More » -
introductions
'Bruno' Gets Up Close and Personal With Eminem
It's generally a pretty safe assumption that something ridiculous will happen each year at The MTV Movie Awards, and tonight's version of the show did not disappoint. Sacha Baron Cohen just descended bare-assed from the ceiling as "Bruno" and landed in Eminem's lap in the "69" position. Hilarity ensued. More » -
trade roundup
Resurrections, Just in Time for Easter
Nicole Kidman and Woody Allen join forces, cable ratings are up, the Kennedys get a conservative treatment, Ian Somerhalder is back, and, just maybe, so is Jesus. More » -
mtv
Just How Uncomfortable Does MTV's 'How's Your News?' Make You Feel?
In a few days, you'll be able to tune in to MTV and follow a group of mentally challenged individuals exploring America in a bus, and it has nothing to do with Road Rules. More » -
feuds
TV Guide Takes Active Steps To Imagine A World Without 'Bromance'
Back when everyone in America was doing coke and playing Galaga, TV Guide was the only game in town for television schedules. Now, we all have set-top boxes, and TV Guide is pissed. More » -
poop
MTV Exec's Gift Of Feces Yet Another Sign Of Hollywood Cutbacks
If you think your company's stingy holiday offerings were lame... More » -
real world brooklyn
'Real World: Brooklyn' Addresses Every Letter Of The LGBT Alphabet
You knew this, but there's a shitload of Queer in the real world: Gays, Protogays, Ex-Gays, Don't Ask Don't Tells, and M2Fs have all been accounted for in MTV's Real World: Brooklyn. More » -
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bromance
'Bromance': It Begins With Morning Wood, And It Ends In Tears
Last night, MTV started its new "Brody Jenner finds a friend" series Bromance in the way many had anticipated: with a loving homage to the naked, hooded dehumanization perfected at Abu Ghraib. -
awards
'Twilight' Lady-Pandering Earns MTV 'Patronizers of the Year' Award
Where most media have moved on from courting Twilight fans, MTV has one remaining drop of profit to wring from the condescension flood. To wit, Twilight More » -
john norris
John Norris A Victim Of MTV Layoffs?
The 850 layoffs at Viacom today—including hundreds at MTV—are claiming the livelihoods of tons of hardworking people who did their jobs well without ever receiving fame and fortune. And just like when a jumbo jet crashes with hundreds of souls aboard, the first question is: "Were any celebrities involved?" You know you were thinking that, you heartless swine. Well (according to an unconfirmed rumor from an inside tipster), your third-favorite MTV correspondent-for-life, John Norris, was laid off today. After the jump, we've got other reports from the Viacom scene. More » -
the hills
Audrina Patridge Risks Underexposure as MTV Crews Tossed From Neighborhood
Civil war is stirring near Audrina Patridge's plush new Hollywood Dell redoubt, where the MTV crews following her every supple, dignified move has drawn outrage from neighbors insisting that the city regulate nearby shooting shooting on The Hills. And after hearing the residents' appeal, the Los Angeles film office has in fact interceded to bring you less Audrina from the comfort of her own home — marking a small victory for a tormented community under siege, and possibly marking the West Coast front in America's burgeoning Hills defensive. More » -
model makers
Fat Chance: Our first exposure to the greenlit MTV show Model Makers — in which eager wannabe models would have to lose 80 pounds in 12 dangerous, light-headed weeks — managed to offend even our already MTV-wary sensibilities. Now, HuffPo blogger Darryl Roberts says that MTV has decided to quietly discontinue their plans to air Model Makers. Guess we'll have to fill the gap waiting for the premiere of Ruby! [HuffPo] -
mtv
BREAKING: MTV/Lionsgate Employees Flee Gas Leak, Take Refuge in Happy Hour
Certainly we'd never wish suffering or terror on anyone, but it's refreshing to see our friends at MGM hand off this week's fleeing-in-terror duties to someone else for a change: A Defamer operative sent word minutes ago that staffers at MTV and Lionsgate have evacuated their positions due to a gas leak in the garage of their Santa Monica headquarters. But where to go, especially without the aid of their threatened vehicles? More » -
audrina patridge
Audrina To Stare Plaintively After Smelling Ex Justin Bobby on BFF Lauren Conrad
Though Hills stars Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge recently patched up their fractured friendship under the warm, nurturing eye of multiple video cameras, a brand-new rumor has both girls on the outs yet again. Says E!: More » -
the hills
Brody's Cougar Mom Is On The Prowl
We have to admit, we were surprised at how much our hearts ached in the absence of Lauren Conrad - who was sojourning to Italy for some much needed R&R after exhausting her energy crying mascara tears while sparring with Audrina - during the majority of last night's episode of The Hills. But we knew those crafty MTV producers wouldn't leave us hanging, sending entertainment in the form of Linda Thompson, Brody Jenner's mom. You may be more familiar with Brody's dad, Bruce Jenner, a former Olympian who along with his wife, Kris, helm their clan of estrogen-fueled narcissists on Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Linda, on the other hand, is a plastic-surgery addled cougar extraordinaire who apparently once dated Elvis Presley. Well, on the show last night during Stephanie Pratt and LC's former flame Doug Reinhardt's maybe-date at hotspot Beso, Linda runs into the couple and eyes the shit out of little Dougie the baseball player's physique. "Are you two on a date? Is that what's happening here?" she asks. "Just wondering!" she shrugs, throwing her hands in the air. We're sure you're just curious, Linda. But this is a woman who scored with The King - so the son of a frozen burrito heir? Ain't no thang. [The Hills] -
shia labeouf
A Lesson In Shia LaBeouf Smack Talk, Taught by Professors Seth Green and Clark Duke
Though Shia LaBeouf is still recovering from wounds both real and imaginary, none are too fresh to stop actors Seth Green and Clark Duke from landing a few blows of their own. The Defamer-loving duo spoke to MTV while promoting their new comedy Sex Drive, and when they learned that LaBeouf had shamed their interviewer into carrying a bulky folder, the actors let fly with a volley of neverending LaBeouf insults that would put any "yo mama" contest to shame. Don't listen to 'em, Shia: plug your ears, pop in a VHS of Porky's II: The Next Day, and have a stiff drink (or five). [MTV] -
the hills
Could the Ladies of 'The Hills' Be America's Best Dance Crew?
We know that the cast members of The Hills have many outside talents: Lauren Conrad is an acclaimed young adult author, Heidi Montag makes a second living as a fitness instructor, and Audrina Patridge's blog reveals her to be a face cream connoisseur. But before last night, did we have any idea how skilled the Hills women are at cutting a rug? While watching the band White Tie Affair perform at the Roosevelt, Lauren & Co. kicked out the jams with a series of white-girl moves so fierce that they could be worked into common rotation for just about any type of song, no matter the genre. In fact, to test our theory, we tried out their moves to a very 90's backing track that just so happens to be making a Kanye-assisted comeback. Go Lauren, go Lauren, go! [MTV] -
dave holmes
EXCLUSIVE: Former MTV VJ Dave Holmes On The Demise Of 'TRL', MTV's Current Programming Slate
When we heard the news that MTV mainstay TRL was headed for that great cancellation box in the sky, we decided to get some inside scoop from one of the people who knew it best: former MTV VJ Dave Holmes. The music buff first appeared on the channel as the runner-up to Jesse Camp on MTV's 1998 Wanna Be a VJ contest, but he outlasted the offbeat Camp and hosted multiple shows on MTV, eventually ascending to his own major place in the TRL firmament. So what does Holmes make of the cancellation — and the current state of MTV in general? Lauren Conrad, you've been warned: More » -
mtv
MTV's RW/RRC Destroy the Planet Challenge: Did you happen to catch Real World/Road Rules Challenge: The Island, in which your favorite MTV reality stars are plopped "on a deserted beach off the coast of Panama" to compete for $300,000 in treasure? It's like The Hills, but with relay races and coconuts! And all they had to do was clear some rainforest, throw up some temporary living quarters that they never bothered to dismantle, and leave a pile of junk behind, according to one local's account: “I have seen the aftermath of a tornado and this was almost as bad...A large plot of rainforest had been cleared, a pristine Caribbean beach had been trashed, and the creators had simply packed up and left. A family of what appeared to be ‘squatters’ had already moved into one of the buildings left behind.” [sustainablog] -
trl
RIP 'TRL'
One of the final shows on the MTV roster to still fulfill their "M" classification, Total Request Live is at long last drawing to a close. Once the state-of-the-art in boy-band-disseminating technology, it allowed viewers to e-mail, text, and phone in their votes, while offering them the thrill of seeing their feedback—"OMG Tom DeLonge izz zooooo hot. Blink-182 roxx so hard!!! LUV U GUYZZZZ :D BlinkGrl182"—crawl along the bottom of the screen in real time. More » -
russell brand
Britney Spears and Russell Brand Go On First Date Sans 'Third Wheel' Elephant
After a long history of exclusively dating poseurs and paparazzi, comeback-adjacent singer Britney Spears may be taking on her biggest romantic challenge yet: Russell Brand. Though their first meeting at a VMAs commercial went poorly, with Spears recoiling from the comedian and calling him "Russell Brown," the Daily Mail reports that the two hooked up this week (noting, in their helpfully British way, that Brand is "an ex-drug and sex addict"): More » -
jordin sparks
VMA Killjoy Jordin Sparks Brings Less-Than-Helpful Chastity Tips to Talk-Show Circuit
Bravely taking her pro-abstinence, purity-ring-rocking message to the Fox News flock, Jordin Sparks spent a few minutes last night explaining her recent outburst against oversexed Video Music Awards host Russell Brand. The difference between a "non-virgin" and "slut" remains foggy, but, at the very least, Sparks's convictions are burnished here to the fine Murdochian glow that so eluded the MTV class last weekend. The same cannot be said for her remarks on the subject of temptation ("I'm not saying I'm perfect by any means!"), from which conservative firebrand and noted hymen-defense expert Sean Hannity was later forced to rescue her with that metaphorical bucket of ice water known around the Fox offices as "a commercial break." [Fox News] -
lauren conrad
Lauren Conrad Book Deal to Finally Bring Awkward Pauses, Text Messaging to the Page
Though The Hills star Lauren Conrad is highly paid enough without having to do anything but passive-aggressively judge her friends over drinks at Goa, she must be applauded for finding new skills to add to her highly staged resume. First, the 22-year-old took a detour into fashion design, and now, according to People, she's been signed to a three-book deal with HarperCollins. Heretofore limited to short stories in the vein of a Sidekicked "OMG Audrina WTF," the deal will allow Conrad to spread her wings and write young adult fiction: More » -
russell brand
Did MTV Censor Russell Brand's Shocking Bristol Palin Joke?
Mostly lost in the furor over the purity ring comments made by VMAs host Russell Brand were the even more scathing jabs he threw the Republicans' way during the telecast. Never afraid to be politically controversial (a formerly crack-addled Brand was fired from British MTV for showing up to work on September 12, 2001 dressed as Osama Bin Laden), the comedian called President Bush a "retarded cowboy" who "wouldn't be trusted with a pair of scissors," then dismissed the teen pregnancy of Sarah Palin's daughter as a "PR stunt." Now, Brand is telling the UK's Daily Telegraph that he had one even more outrageous Palin joke in that vein, but MTV wouldn't let him tell it: More » -
jordin sparks
Upon Reflection, Maybe Jordin Sparks Didn't Mean to Call You All 'Sluts'
The VMAs tend to be known for their feuds, whether it's Madonna vs. Courtney Love, Kid Rock vs. Tommy Lee, or Michael Jackson vs. his overwhelming fear of Lisa Marie Presley's pursed lips. This year's ceremony was no different, though the anger came from an unexpected source: American Idol winner Jordin Sparks, who overstepped a line while defending the Jonas Brothers' purity, declaring, "It's not bad to wear a promise ring, because not everybody — guy or girl — wants to be a slut." This implication of an either/or sexual ultimatum prompted an outcry from the historically ribald music world, with elder stateswoman Courtney Love prescribing an unorthodox remedy of "pussy and some cock" and the Jonas Brothers themselves laying hands on salacious host Russell Brand to forgive him. Now, in an interview with EW, Sparks clarifies her controversial words: More » -
vmas
Purity Ratings: Though this year's chaste edition of the MTV Video Music Awards couldn't boast a must-see trainwreck on the level of Britney Spears's 2007 performance, it still outrated that telecast by 15% in MTV's 12-34 target demo (it beat the 2006 edition by a whopping 41%, and averaged 8.4 million total viewers overall). In fact, according to Broadcasting & Cable, the VMAs telecast was the highest-rated cable show in that demo so far this year. Just think how many more viewers could have been retained without the weirdly shot, one-joke Jonah Hill intro! [Broadcasting & Cable] -
russell brand
And Lo, The Jonas Brothers Did Absolve Russell Brand Of His Sins
Heading into Sunday night's VMAs, one could never have predicted that the Jonas Brothers would end up central to the ceremony's only real controversy; and yet, thanks to Russell Brand's purity-tweaking jokes and Jordin Sparks's impassioned tirade against sluts, there they found themselves. Would the squeaky-clean trio retaliate by wagging their ringed fingers in Brand's face, or would they take Courtney Love's colorful advice to sample "some pussy and some cock and shut the hell up"? According to the BBC, they chose a different route, claiming to be fans of Brand (thanks to his last Conan O'Brien appearance) and giving him some pointers on pleasing the fickle American audience: More » -
courtney love
Courtney Love Has the Last, Incoherent Word on the VMAs Purity Ring Controversy
Though it's been a long while since Courtney Love caused controversy at the VMAs, the singer wasn't about to let last night's purity ring flap pass by without giving that virginal young upstart Jordin Sparks the what-for. Yes, even though Love claims not to have watched last night's ceremony (though she adores host Russell Brand), she took to her blog to denounce the latest crop of chaste young performers, giving them the sort of X-rated advice that would make a Jonas Brother blush (not that Miley, though — she's heard it all). We've excerpted the best bits below, though we warn you that they're hard to read — not because of their shock value, but because their author is the garrulous misspeller Courtney Love: More » -
to do
Hey Christina Aguilera, How You Gonna Play Us Like That?
It's pretty much been an all-VMA recap kind of day here at Defamer HQ. Not only have we caught you up on our red carpet conversations with Brooke Hogan, Robert Pattinson and Brett Ratner, but we've also given you nearly 24 hours to digest all the goings-on from last night's event. All of which leads us into tonight's installment of Defamer To Do's, where Molls deconstructs some of the evening's high points (namely, T.I.'s LACMA worthy performance) and head-scratchers (why why WHY did X-Tina choose to lip sync?). Enjoy! More » -
brett ratner
To Make the 'Guitar Hero' Movie, Brett Ratner Needs You To Stop Buying the Game
While conducting interviews at the VMAs yesterday, the nearby booth advertising Rock Band 2 was the cacophonous bane of our existence — though no one was more unhappy to see it than director Brett Ratner. As you may recall, the Defamer-beloved auteur (and big penis enthusiast) aspires to direct a film adaptation based on Rock Band's rival video game franchise, Guitar Hero. Since the idea continues to boggle our minds, we knew we had to venture a question, even if the resulting Defamer-on-Ratner interaction threatened to spin the world off its axis. Fortunately, the Rush Hour 3 helmer was every bit the gentleman. We blame the heatstroke. [MTV] More » -
video music awards
John Legend Wants None Of What God Warrior Jordin Sparks Is Selling
While we enjoyed sharing with you the alternately entertaining, excruciating, and utterly discombobulating experience of attending the 2008 VMAs in person, there were moments completely lost on us from our extremely un-VIP vantage point. Take, for example, this off-prompter ad-lib from Jordin Sparks, in which the uncomfortable tension building steadily in Soundstage 16—Brandian anti-Republicanism and hypersexuality reacting against Jonas Brothers's calculated chastity—burst like on overfilled water balloon. What we hadn't noticed at the time was her co-presenter John Legend's overt attempts at distancing himself from Sparks's pro-abstinence sentiments, displaying his naked fingers to indicate the absence of any such sex-warding amulets from Zales. He's good to go, groupies! More » -
brooke hogan
Brooke Hogan on Sarah Palin: 'Who's That?'
Though it's only been a scant ten days since John McCain announced Sarah Palin as his running mate, it's hard to find anyone on earth immune to the media onslaught that followed. Oh, for the halcyon days of mid-August, when our nation was more consumed with the abdominals of Michael Phelps than the baby-making, celebrity-stifling, Liz Lemon-resembling Palin name! To meet the rare creature who still knows nothing about the controversial candidate would be like staring into the windows of our pre-RNC innocence, and reader, we found such a transcendent experience on the carpet of the VMAs last night: More » -
russell brand
Russell Brand, Britney Spears, And The Tale Of One 'Terrifying Vagina'
Though ladykiller VMAs host Russell Brand is certainly no stranger to female anatomy, his elephant-starring VMAs commercial with Britney Spears was nearly waylaid when he became obsessed with, as he puts it, one "terrifying vagina." In a chat with the Ebert-usurping Ben Lyons, Brand details how the elephant's mammoth sexual orifice nearly blew his mind, causing him to be late to an initial meeting with Spears (and subsequently leading the confused pop singer to ID him on-air as "Russell Brown"). With colorful anecdotes like these, the Defamer liveblog of this Sunday's VMAs should be a breeze; most of all, we can't wait until an onstage Brand takes the Jonas Brothers aside to demonstrate the colorful things an ambitious trio is really capable of. [MTV] -
kanye west
VMA FYI: In news that will surely please his favorite white girl Scarlett Johansson, Kanye West has been picked to close out this year's VMAs (which will be opened — in some fashion — by Britney Spears). Since it's the ceremony's 25th anniversary, the network says we can expect winks to MTV's past including Christina Aguilera returning to reprise "Genie in a Bottle," and Katy Perry essaying Madonna's "Like a Virgin." And just like at this year's MTV Movie Awards, we'll be live on the red carpet Sunday evening causing havoc and liveblogging our hearts out. But unlike the '07 VMAs, this year's event looks like it might actually be able to hold our interest, thanks to the addition of the unpredictable Russell Brand as host. Let's just hope they don't let Eva Longoria Parker near him — MTV couldn't afford the FCC fine if those two got into water sports again. [MTV] -
britney spears
Comeback Comeback: Britney Spears's ongoing flirtation with this year's VMAs has progressed past the stage of hanging out near an elephant while Russell Brand played Itsy Bitsy Spider up her inner thigh. She's going to open the show—though great care is being taken not to have a repeat of last year's performance, a still of which now appears next to the word "train·wreck" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Instead, MTV Networks Music Group President Van Toffler said it will be something "fun and unexpected." Britney said in a statement, "MTV has long played an important role in my career. How can I not be there to kick off their 25th VMAs? I'm excited to open the entire show, to say hi to my fans and to be nominated." [AP/Yahoo] -
whitney port
Did MTV Use 'The Hills' To Test the Whitney Spinoff Waters?
For months, the rumor mill has been buzzing that Whitney Port of The Hills (she of the goofy mugging and relatively drama-free lifestyle) would be receiving her own, New York-set MTV spinoff. Last night's Hills episode, then, seemed in many cases like a trial run for that series, as fearsome People's Revolution flack Kelly Cutrone sent Whitney to the Big Apple to do some model castings, eventually manipulating the gangly blonde into a date with a shaggy-haired hunk. Does Whitney have what it takes to assume center stage, or is she forever destined to play curious second fiddle to the mothership series' Lauren Conrad? Remarkably (and with the help of videographer Molly McAleer), we were able to get our hands on a classified notes session smuggled from deep inside the bowels of MTV, and the candid reactions from execs Sheryl Rather-Wexler and Kip Finkelberg Jr. may shed some new light on Whitney's primetime viability. Godspeed, girl. [MTV] -
katy perry
Which Female Celebrity Will MTV Enlist for a Sapphic Smooch at the VMAs?
Though MTV isn't always respectful of its own history, it can usually be counted on to remember one thing: a VMAs ceremony is nothing without a memorable kiss. Whether it's Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley or Madonna and Britney Spears, celebrity-on-celebrity Frenching is an absolute must if the network hopes to draw buzz through umpteen rebroadcasts the following week. Luckily, one of this year's biggest songs — "I Kissed a Girl" — gives MTV just the opportunity it needs. Says E!'s Marc Malkin: More » -
the hills
'The Hills': 5 Reasons We Can't Get Behind Lo Anymore
Though it pains us to say this, we think we may be over Lo Bosworth, the incipient villainess of The Hills' fourth season. When we first met Lo, she was amongst the most breezy members of Hills forerunner Laguna Beach, but there's no place for cute quips on The Hills when out-and-out bitchery will win the day. That, ultimately, is what makes Lo's transformation all the more frustrating — though she has settled into her role as Audrina's archrival for their friend Lauren's attention, her irritating machinations are actually making us root for the blank blogger (and that's saying a lot). With the help of Molly McAleer, we pored over last night's episode and put together a list of the top five reasons we simply can't support Lo anymore. Lo, you're on notice: we're officially frienemies now. [MTV]




















































