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trade roundup
Fat Women Need Bachelors Too
Movies get directors, and they also get Matthew McConaughey. The Office actors just got rich, and fat people just got validated, in glorious reality show form. More » -
open caption
And As He Turned the Corner, We Somehow Knew It Was the Last Time We'd Ever See Him
[Matthew McConaughey Sticksailing (or something) in Malibu; image via Splash] -
kind buds
35 Celebrities Who Smoke Pot
Over the weekend, a picture of Michael Phelps smoking a bong was made public. What's the big deal? It's not like he's the first (or last) celeb to toke. [Jezebel] -
matthew mcconaughey
And Now, Selected Quotations from Matthew McConaughey's Myspace Masterpiece, 'Travel Blog'
When one thinks of Matthew McConaughey, the name evokes Kate Hudson romcoms, a shirt-repelling pair of pecs, and the ability to make both beef and babies seem extra tasty. But does one think "writer"? -
trade roundup
Stop The H8 With Super-Breath!
· Showtime and Stan Lee are indeed developing a drama about the life of a gay superhero, as Hero author Perry Moore hinted back in May. And he just happens to be gay, OK? He's not, like, Poppers Boy or Wonder Trannie. [Variety] More » -
matthew mcconaughey
Matthew McConaughey Joins Elite Group Of A-Listers Who Couldn't Crack a Six-Figure Opening
Any Straight-to-Flopz masterpiece can top out below $100,000 theatrically, but it takes a special kind of crap to do so with a real star above the line. Take Surfer, Dude, the new Matthew McConaughey adventure-in-shirtlessness that found exactly zero takers at Rotten Tomatoes and not many more upon its release in 96 theaters nationwide: $36,497 worth, to be precise, likely prompting the actor/producer/placenta vintner to wonder if perhaps he should have saved the comma in the film's title for the total gross. More » -
matthew mcconaughey
Matthew McConaughey May Expose More Than Just His Chest in 'Surfer, Dude'
Eternally shirtless actor Matthew McConaughey has never been afraid of showing a little skin, but the lengths he goes to in his new film may make even his hard-to-shock mother blush. According to a review in San Diego City Beat, McConaughey's new stoner opus Surfer, Dude (opening in select locations this Friday? Who knew!) reveals more of the actor than most non-Apatow male stars are used to baring: More » -
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nicolas cage
Sarah Palin Superstar
· Let Lindsay Lohan, Albert Brooks, Jamie Lynn Spears, and Life Magazine introduce you to the GOP's great vice-presidential hope. More » -
matthew mcconaughey
In The Studio With Voiceover Maestro, Matthew McConaughey
You've met Matthew McConaughey, Creepiest Beef Spokesman in the World, but now we'd like to introduce you to a different voiceover McConaughey: That of proud University of Texas alumnus and lifelong Longhorns fan, voicing an intro for preschool indoctrination video Baby Longhorn. ("BABY Longhorn® combines all the great things you love about the University of Texas, with all the things you want your lil’toddler to learn—numbers, letters, colors and more.") There's no mistaking those deep, caramel inflections, sedating your toddler into hypnagogic state that allows them to start calling offensive plays before they are even able to speak. But what happens in those moments right before the recording light turns red? Sit back and be amazed at the vast array of vocal warm-up tricks stashed up McConaughey's sleeve. [Baby Longhorn, TMZ] -
matthew mcconaughey
Matthew McConaughey's Surf Heavies Charged With Pap Battery
Charges have been filed against two surfers who rose to the defense of their brah-in-arms, Matthew McConaughey, when they felt his groove was being unfairly threatened by encroaching paparazzi at Malibu's Paradise Cove last June. From the Reuters report: More » -
matthew mcconaughey
Matthew McConaughey's Mom Recalls The Time His Father Expired Inside Her
Behind every great man is a great mom—and no one knows that more than Tropic Thunder star Matthew McConaughey, who appears to have chosen a perfectly lovely one to bear him a son, suitable for toting to red carpet events and John Mellencamp concerts in a Coleman beer cooler. But what of McConaughey himself? To whom can we attribute his uncompromisingly freewheeling spirit, his Southern sophistication, and, yes, his undeniable sexual ferocity? To put it a little more floridly: Who planted little Matthew's placenta beneath a tree, and tended to it lovingly until it bore fruit? We now have an answer: More » -
hollywood privacywatch
Hollywood PrivacyWatch: Neil Patrick Harris, Sweatin' To The Oldies
PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our millions of Defamer operatives. We'd like to remind you that this feature is powered by you, so if you want to see more installments of PrivacyWatch, then all you've got to do is to send us your sightings. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you saw NPH getting all sweaty during a workout. More » -
matthew mcconaughey
Try Mighty McConaughey's Afterbirth Ale: There's Real Placenta In Every Drop!
There's something about Hollywood dads and afterbirth. Unlike Tom Cruise, who greedily pledged to gobble up every last drop of the nutrient-rich biological matter, however, Matthew McConaughey instead told CNN's Dr. Sanjay Gupta that he has something far eco-friendlier planned for his own son's: More » -
clay aiken
Matthew McConaughey Vs. Clay Aiken: A Study In Dad Contrasts
Today brings the joyous news that ovary-shaking Idol demigod Clay Aiken has become a father to a healthy baby boy through the miracle of cutting edge fertilization techniques (the specs of how it was all accomplished are available here, if you care). In honor of this most improbable celebrity parenthood, we thought we'd compare and contrast Clay's siring achievement to that of another unlikely new dad, Matthew McConaughey: More » -
the clip show
The Night Is Darkest Before The Dawn
· If it weren't for Dark Knight news, there wouldn't have been much news at all. After dispatching the Joker, Batman took on his toughest foe to date, the deranged Momzo The Clown (specialty: extortion). Batman denies all of the charges, which is just fine with new Oscar frontrunner Aaron Eckhart. More » -
short ends
NPH Sweeps The Clouds Away As The Shoe Fairy On 'Sesame Street'
· Ever since Neil Patrick Harriswarnedtold the world back in February that he would be appearing as The Shoe Fairy on an episode of Sesame Street, we have been waiting for the mystical unicorn rider to appear on our local PBS affiliate. Fortunately for all of us, our long wait is now over. And while we are slightly sad to report that this clip does not have him uttering the line "I am the greatest fairy in all the land" (that bon mot must've landed on the cutting room floor), we have better news to share. Prepare yourselves for ... a musical number! [Sesame Street] More » -
matthew mcconaughey
Behold And Be Stoked! The Young Prince McConaughey!
We forwarded Matthew McConaughey's people your favorite suggestions of Bongo Romcom and Miller Chill, but it seems he chose to go the Old Timey Gold Prospector route, and named his son Levi Alves. The OK! magazine exclusive currently gracing Gelson's checkout aisles and 7-Eleven service counters reportedly netted McConaughey $3 million; paired with the earnings from his Beef Guild spots, this additional income allows the actor the freedom to pursue smaller passion projects like Surfer, Dude. Flanked on the cover by girlfriend Camila Alves and tiny, perfect Levi, McConaughey still manages to maintain sultry eye-contact with the camera, as if to say, "Yeah, I'm a dad. But I'm not dead. Catch my drift? Is anyone else's shirt chaffing them? Boy, I could sure go for a lobster roll. Is there a clam shack in the area?" McConaughey explained to the magazine how the delivery room was transformed into an flip-flop-devouring bongo-vortex: More » -
matthew broderick
This Week In Tabloids: Matthew McConaughey's Son, Angelina's Fake Baby, Sarah Jessica Parker's Cheating Husband
Welcome back to Midweek Madness, in which we suffer through the mind-numbing non-news in the celebrity tabloids so you don't have to. After a slow summer, the scandals are picking up! Matthew Broderick, whom Star refers to as "Sarah Jessica Parker's husband," allegedly had an affair, but it's SJP who gets the glam cover shot. Matthew McConaughey and his new spawn get a cover; Jennifer Garner lands one and Brad & Angelina get two. Intern Margaret assists as we merrily skip through the meadows of OK!, Life & Style, In Touch and Star, after the jump. [Jezebel] -
penelope cruz
The Real Reason Penelope Cruz Can't Keep A Man: ‘When She Takes Off Her Blouse, It’s The Least Sexual Moment In History’
In the latest issue of W, cover girl Penelope Cruz assures the reporter that she “never talk[s] about her private life to journalists...NEVER," Of course, a few grafs above, the pretty little beard-candy spends much of the interview talking, in great detail, about the most private of private issues we didn’t even know we wanted to know! Penelope’s “inner monsters” that have ruined her so-called relationships, why “sweating and bleeding” is her idea of “happiness,” and far more after the jump: More » -
sacha baron cohen
Hellos and Goodbyes
· Sacha Baron Cohen's Bruno exploits took him from Israel to Arkansas; his Sherlock Holmes adventures to come may or may not include the missus. More » -
celebrity babies
Alba, McConaughey Offspring Already Slumming It With OK!
Ah, the three trimesters of Hollywood child birth: 1. pretend to love pregnancy, 2. schedule a c-section in order to sidestep any labor or stretching of siren vag, and 3. whore out your newborn's picture to the highest bidder. It's such a magical time! And while there are critics, it's a natural response to choose to splash your baby's face across the tabloids, especially when you constantly publicly reminisce about the good ol' days when you could buy panty liners in private. And why participate in the Hollywood Baby Bonanza? It's not like the early publicity will morph your kid into some kind of poorly mannered fauxhawked skunk. However, it will get you paid. More » -
defamer
Freewheeling Infant Surfs Out Of Womb A Healthy Baby McConaughey
Sexiest Beef-Pusher Alive Matthew McConaughey can strike "dabble in fatherhood" from his phonebook-thick bucket list, as his girlfriend has just birthed the actor's first child: a healthy son, with ten fingers, ten toes, but—in an unfortunate congenital defect which doctors reassure will have no bearing on the child's quality of life—only one, tiny flip-flop. From the Reuters report: More » -
defamer
Meet Matthew McConaughey, The Creepiest Beef Spokesman In The World
Did you stuff your face with enough beef over the holiday weekend? If not, Matthew McConaughey is gonna be mighty pissed off. Check out the new radio spot he recorded for the National Cattleman's Beef Association. You know, the dudes who came up with that "Beef, it's what's for dinner" slogan? Well, they got themselves a brand new golden-haired, A-list pitchman and the results have become a bit of an obsession here in the Defamer offices. Why does it fascinate so? Maybe it's because McConaughey plays up his every vocal tic for maximum effect, like he's trying to lure a small child into a windowless van with some candy. Or maybe it's because their new tagline, "Discover the power of protein in the land of lean beef," is so impossibly vomit inducing (and also a little homoerotic). Or perhaps it's because at the end of the day, Matthew delivers his most convincing performance since A Time To Kill. Whatever the reason, it totally works. I ate like 15 burgers this weekend and couldn't be happier. Listen to the ad after the jump. More » -
defamer
The Infamous Matthew McConaughey Flip-Flop Losing Incident: The Video!
It was the tribal rump-humping that would incite a beach-dwellers' Civil War. (OK, maybe not directly, but dotted-lines can be drawn.) In its path—a thousand Nicaraguan signoritas' hearts, mashed into a fine pulp. Of what do we speak? Why, Mashew McDonauhdgrl's flip-flop displacing Firewater Demon Dance of Handsy Pasión, of course! And thanks to the fee-meeting blurry-cellphone-video-producers at TMZ, we can finally catch the glimpse of the star of 8000 forgettable romcoms, caught red-handed as he...uh...kinda shakes his butt to the beat, sweats profusely, and doesn't come into direct contact with anyone else. Sssssscandalous. More » -
verne troyer
Swindlers, Sex Tapes And Coreys
· Things we learned at the Los Angeles Film Festival this week. School Of Rock 2 isn't a pipe dream. Guillermo del Toro isn't going to milk The Hobbit. Women deserve equal talk show hosting rights, too. Nobody wanted to make Animal House. Chris Carter is as secretive as ever. Did somebody order stake? More » -
matthew mcconaughey
More Details On Matthew McConaughey's Boozy Nicaraguan Nights: Did A Late-Night Tryst Turn Ugly?
As we sadly noted earlier this month, soon-to-be-dad and LA’s resident surfing community iconoclast Matthew McConaughey had quite the rambunctious stay in Nicaragua earlier this month, “dirty-dancing” his way through every girl at a bar and drunkenly diving into sewage ditches searching for his beloved flip-flops. But more details about the chest-baring rabblerouser’s boozy nights are now coming out, and despite his endless attempts to kiss and “put the make on every woman in his path,” McConaughey reportedly wound up going home with two male bar buddies instead. And his two new guy pals in question made it all the way to his hotel room. What happened once the threesome got there, after the jump. More » -
defamer
When You're A Pap, You're A Pap All The Way
100 years from now, history buffs will return to the Paradise Cove beachhead decked in period-appropriate costume, thrilled to recreate that region's legendary battle between the Paps and the Serfs. It was a war that began, like so many others, over the honor of an object of astonishing beauty: In this case, that would be Matthew McConaughey—their flip-flop-misplacing Helen of Troy. The surfing battle wages, having migrated online: More » -
matthew mcconaughey
Battle At Paradise Cove: Matthew McConaughey's Surf-Toughs Pummel Beach Paps
The heat, a killer surf, and a clear shot of Hollywood's favorite shirt-eschewing leading man was a recipe for disaster this weekend. Having returned from his recent Nicaraguan escapades a proud flop-owner in search of his missing flip, Matthew McConaughey combated our city's punishing heat wave by hitting the tasty breaks of Malibu's Paradise Cove. It was there that several upstanding members of our city's paparazzo community—hoping to catch that elusive, $1 million photo of McConaughey hanging toes to the nose while clutching his newborn—were confronted, and ultimately assaulted, by an intimidating and unruly mob of board-shorted surfing henchmen. From the LAT: More » -
missdemeanors
"This Chick Used To Be So Cute. Now She Looks Like She’s Halfway Through A Sex Change. "
Welcome back to Missdemeanors, in which we issue virtual wrist-slaps to popular gossip bloggers for Crimes Against Womanity. These week the "writers" of these celebrity blogs call Jessica Simpson and Hilary Duff 'fat', Tila Tequila a 'whore', and Camila Alves (Matthew McConaughey's pregnant girlfriend) is a "maid" getting "preferential treatment" because of her ethnicity. After the jump, we punish the blogerati for their idiocy. Let the Jezebel justice system begin! [Jezebel] -
midweek madness
This Week In Tabloids: Why Barack Loves Michelle; Angelina Is Anxious Or Adopting
Welcome back to Midweek Madness, where we parse tabloid punditry so you don't have to. This week marked a slight departure in tabloid fare, as Us featured potential President and First Lady Barack and Michelle Obama on the cover. Don't let it throw you; the other tabloids covered all the usual players, with In Touch, Ok! and Star devoted to Brangelina's baby farm and Life & Style hot on the Britney beat. Come with us as we tell tall tales of tabloid trauma, after the jump. [Jezebel] -
matthew mcconaughey
'Ahm Mashew McConauhdgrl—Ahm Gonna Be Daddee!!!'
We once pledged that impending fatherhood would do nothing to tame the mighty, freespirited party-beast that is Hollywood's most sought-after torsobitionist, Matthew McConnaughey. Loath as we are to deliver a pinky-flinging, double-shaka "we told you so" sign—well, we told you so: More » -
Stunt Dating
Three Reasons Why We Don’t Buy The Kate Hudson And Lance Armstrong Love Story
Only days after rumors surfaced that the on-and-off relationship between Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson had switched back to Off, the Stallion was seen preying on new anonymous blondes in New York City while lovelorn Kate was allegedly recuperating from the split. So naturally, the news that Hudson picked herself back up and found a new paramour in the fit form of one-ball wonder Lance Armstrong is slightly comforting. But after reading the details surrounding the pair’s so-called dates and blooming “romance,” we aren’t biting. The three clues in particular that leave us seated while others jump to conclusions, after the jump. More » -
Buy My Baby
There’s no shortage of sleazy surprises in the world of baby picture pimping. Today, TMZ reports that soon-to-be-dad Matthew McConaughey and his model girlfriend Camila Alves have hired an actual agent to auction off photos of their upcoming newborn’s visage to the major glossies. And the “brand agent” in question, Todd Shemarya, has quite a record — he’s the man behind Brangelina’s record-setting deal with People, and Christina Aguilera’s far less pricey cover with the same weekly. As disturbed as we are that such a man exists, we’re more saddened to learn that former nude bongo player and hairy beach hippie McConaughey would cash in on his first kid. We're actually starting to miss the hobo doing push-ups outside a trailer we'd grown accustomed to. Then again, the $1MM that he's reportedly been offered by three separate spawn-obsessed mags can buy a lot of t-shirts. [TMZ] -
hero overdose
'Ant-Man' Cometh, and More Fallout From 'Iron Man''s Golden Weekend
Gosh, Marvel Studios, just take a minute to chew your food, would you? Less than 24 hours after its debut picture Iron Man finished a $100 million opening weekend, studio boss David Maisel was all over town announcing Marvel's forthcoming slate — through 2011. As we noted yesterday, an Iron Man sequel is naturally to follow on April 30, 2010, while an adaptation of Thor will drop that same summer on June 10. It gets fairly outrageous from there: The First Avenger: Captain America appears May 11, 2011, followed by The Avengers — combining Iron Man, Captain America, The Incredible Hulk and Thor a mere two months later. (The studio says its sitting out 2009 as a result of a development lag left over from the writers strike.) More » -
defamer
Kate Hudson's Dress Makes Londoners 'Seasick', Matthew McConaughey Horny
Despite the fact that only a couple of fools went to see Fool's Gold when it opened Stateside back in February, stars Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey are still dutifully promoting the film over in London. And McConaughey is still dutifully making a fool of himself. The dad-to-be didn't strip down and play naked bongos on the red carpet, but he did have trouble keeping his eyes off Hudson's satin-clad new curves. Curves which managed to leave everyone feeling "seasick" due to her green gown clashing with a gimmicky blue carpet. Kate's solution? Revisit those Lessons We All Learned In College and maneuver into a new dress in the confines of a "loo" stall! More »













































