Gawker
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celeb jurisprudence
Joe Francis Arrested Again, Yay!
There are some things in life that we'll never get tired of. The incarceration of flashcore titsploitation entrepreneur Joe Francis is one of those things. Break out the body shots! More »
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Comment by cockfightbarmitzvah: I think he got himself arrested on purpose so as to do research for his next video "Guys Gone Wild:... 1 Responses | Other threads
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celeb jurisprudence
Evil-Genius Lawyers Can't Get Joe Francis Stink Out Of New Furniture
Update time! Remember the ambitious Milwaukee lawyers who weirdly namechecked slammer-bound clients Wesley Snipes and Joe Francis en route to swanky new Malibu digs? Yeah — that didn't turn out so well. More »
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By STVComment by Leviticus_71: Peaking from experience, I can't blasme any tactic that can speed along a retreat from the town that Beer built.... 2 Responses | Other threads
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sundance
Most Awful People On Earth Flock To Park City To Toast The Spirit Of Indie Cinema
Worst Publicist in the World™ Jonathan Jaxson sent us this photo of Real Housewives of Atlanta star Kim Zolciak, who "spent a weekend of intimacy with [fellow irredeemable sleazebag] Joe Francis while at Sundance." More » -
joe francis
Here's Joe Francis Bashing Lindsay Lohan's Girlfriend, Samantha 'Rosnan'
Got a paper towel handy? You may need to clean your monitor after watching this much buzzed-about clip of Joe Francis on Tyra yesterday, in which the slimy, Girls Gone Wild conspiracy peddler talks about Lindsay Lohan ("She's not gay!") and her girlfriend, "Samantha Rosnan" (close!). "You dated Lindsay?" Tyra begins, as an evasive Francis wonders whether ten margaritas and two successful exhortations of "Show me that firecrotch!" in Cabo can necessarily be defined as "dating." Then, talk turns to Lohan's sapphic inclinations. More »
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Comment by WGARefugee: He's going to provide us with a lot more material than Mickey Roarke in years to come. I see a... 1 Responses | Other threads
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wesley snipes
Can Wesley Snipes's Evil Genius Lawyers Help You Live the Tax-Evading Hollywood Dream?
We've heard of (and often tried) a lot of ways to ladder-climb in Hollywood, but "superstar tax-evasion defense attorney" is one we had pretty far down our list, just above "blogger." Still, that's not stopping Robert Bernhoft and Robert Barnes (or simply "the Bobs," as Portfolio refers to them in its November issue) from parlaying their momentum from last spring's Wesley Snipes trial into a kind of Malibu-based, Uncle Sam-swatting empire. "Wait," you ask, "didn't Wesley Snipes get three years in prison for misdemeanor tax evasion?" True, but these pinstriped paragons of justice have their own brazen, slightly lawyerly way of looking at it. More »
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By STVComment by NoGrumpys: ...WAIT aren't WE the ones being screwed?!I get paid to get screwed by old farts like this 1 Responses | Other threads
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joe francis
In a Very Special Boardroom, Joe Francis Tells Trump, 'Show Me Your Tits'
Currently enmeshed in a terrible global conspiracy involving 17-year-old girls, U.S. District Judges, a shadowy cabal of vampires (and most likely the Stonemasons), Girls Gone Wild proprietor Joe Francis is on the hunt for a way to restore his good name — and there's no one more willing to help than Donald Trump. Already the crown prince of magnanimity thanks to his selfless (some might say tear-inducing) bail-out of the beleaguered Ed McMahon, Hollyscoop says that the billionaire and the porn purveyor are set to team up: More »
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Comment by HandsomeBwonderful: Isn't it about time we pawn these people off to some other country's TV show? Like Pam Anderson. I would... more » | Other threads
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joe francis
New Joe Francis Conspiracy One For The History Books, Says Joe Francis
Won't someone stand up for a poor, beleaguered pornographer like Joe Francis? These days, his Spitzer-related paydays are too few and far between, and the ex-jailbird spends most of his time battling lawsuits filed on behalf of women who appeared in his Girls Gone Wild videos while underage. Now, Francis is fighting back against what he dubs "southern justice gone awry," filing his own lawsuit in Los Angeles County Court that alleges a massive, breast-baring conspiracy cooked up by teenage girls and U.S. District Judges alike. In fact, according to THR, Esq: More »
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Comment by majikthise: it seems to me this issue is less about which person is right, than it is about which party is... more » | Other threads
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short ends
Caution: Joe Francis Mingling Among Us
· Joe Francis educates Chelsea Handler on the finer differences between prison and jail. Misogynist and woman-hater, however, still essentially mean the same thing. [Chelsea Lately] More »
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By SethComment by lesbiansayswhat: The list reeks of Sci-Fi and supernatural crap. 'The Wire' is at #8 and the list takes a nose-dive after... more » | Other threads
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defamer
New York's Star Call Girl Was A Joe Francis Favorite On The 'Girls Gone Wild' Party Bus Long Before SpitzerGate
It's not breaking news that boinking a politician can really boost a call girl's career, but Eliot Spitzer's speed dial favorite Ashley Dupre is sure milking her fifteen minutes for all they're worth (and, apparently, they're worth a lot). Ashley, aka "Kristen," has gone from cokehead hooker to pop star and potential Penthouse pet in under a week, and it was only a matter of time before Girls Gone Wild parolee Joe Francis dug his grubby claws into her newfound fame. After recently offering Dupre $1 million to ride along on one of his pervy bus tours and getting denied, the annoyingly clever Francis dipped into his sticky archives and managed to dig out five-year old footage of none other than Ashley herself. To see how Ashley partied at 17, check out our clip, via TMZ, after the jump. More »
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Comment by Little Mintz Sunshine: I am just waiting for the inevitable press release announcing her writing deal at Dreamworks. Is Diablo OK? more » | Other threads
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defamer
Incarcerated titty-flash magnate Joe Francis's daring experiment in interactive jurisprudence, You Be The Judge, has been proven a huge success: the women in the video he recently posted to his website have dropped their lawsuit and apologized to the world's foremost documentarian of Spring Break culture. Said Francis to Gatecrasher, "I'm very pleased with the events today. It's a sign of things to come... I'm sure that there will be another [similar lawsuit] that will follow it." And when it does, You Be The Judge will be there to clear his good name with more damning footage of opportunistic co-eds screaming, "I'll give you all the consent you want if you give me one of the Girls Gone Wild shot glasses! Wooo!" [Gatecrasher]
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By MarkComment by Her Royal Empress Dr. Bufflekins III, Esq.: @MisterMuggles: you just reduced annoyed me to giggles. Giggles! more » | Other threads
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defamer
Website Feature Gives Users Satisfaction Of Telling Joe Francis He Belongs In Jail
Having found his vanity website was inciting insufficient outrage, Joe Francis has again switched gears, moving away from Phil Spector side-by-sides to a new offensive aimed squarely at the girls suing the incarcerated Girls Gone Wild CEO for marketing their ill-considered, titty-flashing exploits. In new section "You Be The Judge," visitors are invited to watch video of the plaintiffs telling a camera operator that they are of age, before gleefully relinquishing all rights to footage captured in the nearby Suspicious Goings On tour bus. More »
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By SethComment by scroll_lock: @procrastinator, esq.: she's very embarrassed that you caught her dancing, you know. more » | Other threads
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defamer
Joe Francis Upset At Obvious Miscarriage Of Misogynist-Related Justice
Incarcerated Girls Gone Wild titty-flash magnate Joe Francis isn't afraid to get topical in spreading the word about MeetJoeFrancis.com, the handsomely designed internet presence he launched last week to keep the public up-to-date on his hopes, dreams, and fears while he continues his ongoing battle with a judicial system hell-bent on keeping him off the drunken-coed-clogged beaches of South Florida and Mexico. More » -
defamer
Jailbound Joe Francis Keeping Busy With Web-Based Image-Rehaul Campaign
Disgraced flashcore mogul Joe Francis, currently occupying a cell at the Washoe County Detention Center outside Reno as he awaits trial on tax evasion, appears to have taken full advantage of the facility's popular Inmate Web Development program and fashioned an impressive internet presence for himself. Starting today, Meet Joe Francis lends the visionary behind the Girls Gone Wild drunken co-ed tittie-baring empire a platform for everything from a 10-page legal defense to a personal biography in which he nostalgically recalls first jobs, first cars, and first prom dates rendered drunk enough to capture topless with a Polaroid. News of the launch came through the following e-mail, in which Francis urges his outrage-deficient friends and colleagues to help reverse a travesty of justice foisted upon an honorable man guilty of nothing more than loving a good time: More »
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By SethComment by NotReadyForPrimeTime: I just noticed the photograph accompanying the caption "My First Job." I'm speechless. more » | Other threads
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defamer
Bravo's Andy Cohen Writes Open Letter Calling For More Candy Spelling Open Letters
Instead of merely regurgitating this weekend's escalating war of words between First Widow Candy Spelling—who has found a late-in-life calling penning epistolary diatribes directed squarely at Hollywood's high profile, reckless youth—and fallen flashcore mogul Joe Francis (quick recap: Candy: "You're a boy gone wild!" Joe: "You're a crazy cat lady!"), we thought we'd turn to one of the web's leading opinion-havers on celebrity matters of little-to-no import—Bravo's blogging executive wunderkind, Andy Cohen: More » -
joe francis
Joe Francis To Emerge From 35-Day Jail Sentence A Changed Sleazebag
After spending 14 unforgettable days and nights at an all-inclusive Panama City correctional facility—during which he was also hit with a federal indictment for tax evasion and busted with contraband pharmaceuticals and cash after attempting to bribe a guard—fallen flashcore video tycoon Joe Francis has been handed down a sentence for just the contempt of court portion of his current legal woes: More » -
joe francis
Incarcerated Joe Francis Faces The Contraband Pill-Popping Music
Joe Francis's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week continued yesterday as he was formally charged on multiple counts for bribing a guard for a bottled water, leading to the discovery of cash and prescription meds in his cell. The AP is quick to remind us, however, that beneath every soft-core mogul and alleged despoiler of teenage virgins lies just a scared little boy and the mother who loves him: More »
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By SethComment by BabylonSister: "I didn't do anything" is what a 5-year-old says to Mommy when the cat's on fire. The Big House for Mr.... more » | Other threads
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taxes
"Girls Gone Wild" Tax Indictment Teaches Us Not To Deduct Funny-Looking Numbers
Joe Francis, the quivering chumbucket behind the "Girls Gone Wild" franchise, got indicted Wednesday for tax evasion, as noted by commenter LAGirl. His story holds a lesson for all taxpayers: when claiming deductions, don't use funny-looking numbers. [Consumerist]
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By Ben PopkenComment by stanfrombrooklyn: How is Girls Gone Wild still in business? It seems to me the novelty of co-eds flashing their boobies at... more » | Other threads
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joe francis
Joe Francis Learns That Prison Guards Are Less Susceptible Than Nightclub Doormen To Furtively Dispensed $100 Bills
Joe Francis, the Pied Piper of busty, barely legal co-eds with a taste for the handicam spotlight, has been having—to put it mildly—a bitch of a week. Currently doing hard, Panama City jail time for a contempt of court charge related to his photographing of underage girls in sexual situations, he was also served yesterday with a federal indictment for tax evasion, which carries with it a maximum potential sentence of ten years in a Camp Cupcake-like facility for boys. Now, like the cherry upon this glutonous, schadenfreude sundae, comes this report of a bribe he probably wishes he could take back: More » -
joe francis
Joe Francis Gone Indicted
As many snickered about a measly contempt of court charge that nevertheless offered satisfying dividends by way of seeing Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis thrown behind bars, few could have known that the Big One was trailing right behind. From The Smoking Gun:
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By SethComment by Carson Daly: Apologies to everyone for turning this post in to Wendy Wayrad day. And apologies to my boss, because I... more » | Other threads
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joe francis
Joe Francis Smiles For The Mug Shot Cameras
Behold an EXCLUSIVE! MUG SHOT! EXCLUSIVE! of Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis, freshly booked after his arrest this morning in the Panama City airport on contempt of court charges. In it, the titty-flashing tycoon courageously demonstrates his high threshold for the Panama City authorities' coercive interrogation tactics, managing, despite the cruel and unusual deprivation of maximum-hold hair product, to confidently bare all 72 teeth for the camera, in a smile that all but says, "Just try and make it stick, Smoaky." The details, courtesy of People.com: More » -
joe francis
Joe Francis Uses Clever Self-Promotional Plug To Explain Why He's Breaking Law This Time
If you thought Girls Gone Wild svengali Joe Francis would order his captain to redirect his good-times flotilla to Panama City so he could fulfill a contempt of court jail term, well, you were wrong:
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joe francis
Joe Francis Offered Court-Ordered Opportunity To Go Wild In Florida Jail Cell
The slippery film covering sleaze mogul Joe Francis, the mastermind behind the Girls Gone Wild co-ed tittie-flashing empire, may not be enough for him to slide out of the clutches of the law's long arm. Francis earned a judge's wrath by skipping out on Panama City for a NCAA Final Four game in Atlanta, when he was supposed to be negotiating a settlement in a 2003 lawsuit brought against him by seven minors captured in "sexual situations." Now he's been ordered to do hard time on contempt of court charges: More » -
american idol
Joe Francis Offers To Help Antonella Barba Transition From Top Of Toilet To Front Of 'Girls Gone Wild' DVD
Regardless of what should become of Antonella Barba after her sure-to-suck performance tonight on American Idol, the controversial contestant can take some comfort in knowing she is not without a backup plan: Girls Gone Wild's Chief Operating Titty Inspector, Joe Francis, has issued a press release publicly soliciting Barba's services to the tune of $250,000: More » -
defamer
Defamer Party Report: Jennifer Love Hewitt Flees Abbey The Instant Her Contractual Obligation Is Finished
An operative who attended last night's Oscar viewing party and fundraiser at The Abbey sends in this report, where television's Ghost Whisperer demonstrated an aloofness and general lack of Oscars spirit that set hundreds of Gay Whisperers' tongues wagging, while Joe "I Will Trade You This Fine Girls Gone Wild T-Shirt For a Lifetime Of Shame And Humiliation" Francis impressively demonstrated how he he can find eager female (at least they looked female) companionship anywhere—even at WeHo's premiere sausage factory: More » -
joe francis
Karmic Payback For Joe Francis Comes In Form Of 200 Hours Of Runyon Canyon Pooper-Scooper Duty
In what will surely go down as a black day for members of Hollywood's scenewhore elite who have found themselves on the wrong side of the law, Joe Francis—the world's foremost titty-flashing co-ed talent scout—has received a harsher community service sentence for failing to properly document his subjects' ages than his lawyers had bargained for: More » -
joe francis
Judge Gives 'Girls Gone Wild's' Joe Francis Community Service, Stern Talking To
Determining that the $1.6 million in fines that his company was ordered to pay for not keeping accurate records on the ages of drunken 17-year-olds they may have accidentally filmed in the act of baring their breasts after funneling pints of Goldschlager on Spring Break would hardly put a dent in Girls Gone Wild jailbait-titty-flash mogul Joe Francis's private jet catering budget, much less make him pause for reflection about preying on drunken co-eds, a Florida judge tacked on some community service for Francis and his cohorts, then publicly chided them for the cowardice built in to their business model: More »
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By MarkComment by NotReadyForPrimeTime: I guess castration wasn't an option. more » | Other threads
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joe francis
Joe Francis Promises To Purge Actual Jailbait From His Future Titty-Flash Endeavors
Yesterday, Girls Gone Wild mogul and dildo-adjacent kidnap victim Joe Francis pleaded guilty to not keeping adequate documentation of the ages, identities, and dangerously low Self Esteem Index scores of the improvisational performers in his popular line of instructional drunken-titty-flash videos, agreeing to pay the equivalent of his yearly private-jet fuel expenditure in fines. While Francis' guilty plea will not carry any jail time, the Spring Break documentarian, perhaps still skittish after years of being repeatedly sodomized by the media, got a little scare from the judge. Reports the LAT: More »
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By MarkComment by Nomi Malone: God, those teeth are frightening! It's like peeking into the giant aquarium at Marine World! more » | Other threads
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paris hilton
Paris Hilton Willing To Be Dumb When It Suits Her
In a quote that will be instantly stripped of context and presented as proof that Paris Hilton is aware that she's exactly as intelligent as we assume one who is singlehandedly responsible for the term "celebutard" entering the pop culture vernacular might be, Page Six reports Hilton played the dumb card while being questioned in connection with the Joe Francis Kidnapping And Dildo-Menacing Trial of the Century: More »
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By MarkComment by Hoardmeister: I once found myself at a party in New York City with Paris Hilton (little stick figure). She was... more » | Other threads
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celeb jurisprudence
Joe Francis Fined For Not Properly Documenting Alcohol-Impaired, Jailbait Titty-Flashers
Girls Gone Wild impresario Joe Francis has always been at the vanguard of the inebriated titty-flash industry, so it is probably with great pride that he can now lay claim to being the first person found guilty of breaching the new anti-kiddie porn laws set up by the federal government. The LAT reports: More »
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By SethComment by raincoaster: Seriously, can't the parents of said jailbaittards just sue him for so much he crawls into jail voluntarily? Is that... more » | Other threads
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joe francis
Joe Francis' Lawyer: My Client Is A Well-Hung, Consensual Devirginizer
On late Friday afternoon, we urged you to check out Claire Hoffman's piece in the LAT on America's most successful purveyor of drunkenly flashed jailbait mammaries, Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild, because between Francis' reported roughing up of Hoffman and her retaliatory cold-cocking of the handsy titty-mogul, his insistence that he's "been anally raped over and over by the media" that brings back memories of his infamous, non-penetrative dildo-menacing by a kidnapper, and about twenty other anecdotes that suggest Francis might have the makeup to one day run his own wildly successful Central American dictatorship, there is far too much to cover in a single blog post. Still, we find ourselves coming back to the story of the 18-year-old virgin who surrendered her maidenhead to Francis and was rewarded with three pairs of coveted Girls Gone Wild booty shorts and lingering doubts about how consensual the experience had been. An excerpt follows: More »
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By MarkComment by The Driver: I needed someone to clean ME off with a paper towel after reading that article. This 15-minutes-of-fame thing has officially... more » | Other threads
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joe francis
Tour De Francis Puts Cyclist In Hospital
In the Girls Gone Wild Tour, Joe Francis' rack-flashing sideshow boards a giant bus, prowling America's highways and byways in search of a new crop of coeds willing to sacrifice just a few seconds of their own exposed, jiggling dignity in exchange for being part of something much bigger. Unfortunately, their titty vision quest was set off course when it hit a soft, cyclist-sized bump in the road: More » -
joe francis
Joe Francis Clocked By Girl Gone Riled
As if his life-altering run-in with a pink dildo-wielding lunatic weren't karmic payback enough, Girls Gone Wild visionary/rack-flashing videographer Joe Francis recently found himself on the receiving end of a punch to the face at a party in the Hills. The alleged assailant was an unidentified female partygoer, though the motives remain unknown. (We're thinking less violent, feminist Grrrl uprising, more, "Hey, you said if I showed you my tits and blew you, you'd introduce me to Leo!") In X17's video footage of the events immediately following the attack, a cavalry consisting of K-9 units and a firetruck arrive on the scene, as an outraged Francis points to his eye-level wounds and demands the woman and her companion be arrested. (We have no clue whether or not the assailants in question are the flustered, blonde duo scurrying away at the start of the video.) By the end, cooler heads prevail: Francis says to the gathered paparazzi that the event was "a misunderstanding," and drives off into the night. Never one to shy away from a golden guerrilla video opportunity, however, look for Francis' latest brainstorm, Girls Gone Wild: Fighting Mad to soon grace late night informercials, marrying the best of Gone Wild's drunken exhibitionism to the blood-and-bruise excitement of the burgeoning backyard wrestling and bum fight genres. More » -
joe francis
Defamer Party Promotions: Celebrate Joe Francis' Birthday
Girls Gone Wild emperor Joe Francis' decision to hold his birthday party at Magic Mountain is strangely fitting; his entire life, after all, is something of a theme park—let's call it Drunken Teenager Tittty-Flash Land. (Slogan: "The happiest place on Earth until your father nearly masturbates to the shameful thing you did on spring break.") On Thursday night, Francis and hundreds of his closest friends will descend upon the park, ready to finally discover what the Hollywood club scene would be like if roller coasters and (actual) bumper cars were readily available, allowing the highly inebriated to travel at great speeds without fear of a vehicular manslaughter arrest. Unfortunately, the party's not open to the public (i.e., us), but following this link allows the uninvited to simulate the extreme thrill of being on the list for the event. -
joe francis
Paris Hilton Instrumental In Seizing Of Joe Francis' Dildo Tormentor
There is happy news for the Dino De Laurentiis of inebriated, exhibitionistic, vacationing sorority girl cinema verite, Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis. Darnell Riley, Francis' blackmailing assailant, has pled guilty to some of hisallegedactual* crimes (by way of review, Riley broke into Francis' home, held him at gunpoint, bound him with duct tape, and forced him to repeat the words I m from Boys Gone Wild, and I like it up the ass, capturing the entire scene on video for the purposes of extortion). And to paraphrase an oft-repeated sentiment borrowed from the files of Mystery, Inc., he might have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for that meddling Paris Hilton: More » -
joe francis
Joe Francis Blackmail Video Trial Of The Century To Proceed
The LAT reports that the man accused of extorting pioneering drunken Spring Break exhibitionist documentarian, Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis, was ordered to stand trial after a preliminary hearing yesterday. The Times sums up the apparent irony of the trial efficiently: More » -
defamer
Joe Francis Case Penetrates LA Times
The LA Times ran its first article on Girls Gone Wild impresario Joe Francis' videotaped forced humiliation and blackmail attempt today. And while they tiptoe around the more colorful and battery-operated assault details, one crucial, huge relief of a fact does emerge: More »
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By SethComment by Norma Desmond: But the real question is, will he sell the video? more » | Other threads
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paris hilton
One Night In Francis: The Deflowering Of A Soft-Core King
Radar's report on the videotaped defilement and robbery of Girls Gone Wild mogul and recent Lindsay Lohan-autograph recipient Joe Francis, and the Paris Hilton-entangled events that led up to it, has been made available on their website. We must warn you, however: though there are no objectionable photos, merely thinking the name "Joe Francis" in conjunction with "Paris Hilton" stamps this entire business with a big, fat 'NSFW'. More » -
joe francis
To Joe Francis, Thanks For Everything, Love Lindsay Lohan
A former guest at Girls Gone Wild Chief Titty-Inspecting Officer Joe Francis's Casa Aramara compound (doesn't your house have a name and a website?) in Puerta Vallarta snapped this pic of the estate's guestbook, where a vacationing Lindsay Lohan scrawled these heartfelt words for her gracious host: Joe: I love you, marry me? I know you love 18 yr olds. No, but seriously, thank you so much. Everything was amazing and you were a fuckin' great host. I'll be back to torture ya. Love always, Lindsay. P.S. Wear a condom Joe & keep your tongue in your mouth. La La Loo. You can click the above image to see a larger, more easily readable version. More »
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1-38 of 38 for "Defamer, Joe Francis"
