Gawker
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disasters
The Sad Reality of Joaquin Phoenix's Act
The never-ending parade of miseries that is Joaquin Phoenix's is-he-or-isn't-he trip from retiring actor to budding rapper rumbles on. In this chapter, he fights a heckler at a Miami show. More »
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Comment by MisterHippity: Andy Kaufman already did this decades ago. It's not even original. 6 Responses | Other threads
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lookalikes
Ben Stiller Ripped Off That Joaquin Phoenix Impression
Ben Stiller reportedly flipped out over his Oscar script the day before this year's show. But the Joaquin Phoenix impersonation he came up with as a replacement was hardly original. More » -
clips
Alec Baldwin Mocks Joaquin Phoenix
Somehow we knew Alec Baldwin would come for you first, Joaquin Phoenix. The actor seems as hostile to strung-out hippies as his 30 Rock alter ego Jack Donaghy. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by Truculent: Wish I could have seen the Phoenix meltdown but I was at church for the Feast of the Martyrdom of... 13 Responses | Other threads
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disasters
Joaquin Phoenix Seems Genuinely Collapsed, Director Says
Everyone's been debating whether Joaquin Phoenix's crack-up, as evidenced on Letterman the other night, is real or a hoax. It sure looked real to the director of his last movie. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by mathnet: He was excellent in Walk The Line, and the fact that freaking Witherspoon won an Oscar for that movie while... 7 Responses | Other threads
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hoaxes
Finally, Someone Claims Responsibility For Joaquin Phoenix's Terrible Hoaxing
There is a man in this photo with Joaquin Phoenix. Learn his face, for he may be the dark wizard conjurer behind Phoenix's career transformation into a trainwreck. More »
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Comment by Eric D. Snider: That's the ugliest beard I've seen since Reese Witherspoon. 3 Responses | Other threads
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meltdowns
Career Suicide Caps Joaquin Phoenix's 'Late Show' Stupid Human Tricks
For all the hoaxy drama behind Joaquin Phoenix's hip-hop ambitions, you can't say the guy isn't serious about effectively throwing his film career away after watching his spectacular self-immolation last night on The Late Show. More »
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By STVComment by Oldboy: Nothing that a final appearance at the Viper Room can't cure. 6 Responses | Other threads
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crackpot theories
Joaquin Phoenix Is Both Deeply Disturbed and Faking It
His disastrous Letterman interview brought Joaquin Phoenix's whole quitting-acting-to-become-a-bearded-rapper shtick to a dizzying climax last night. Dave played it off as legit. Others think it's all an Andy Kaufman-esque hoax. We think it's both!
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Comment by AJB_: Made me think about the Crispin Glover '87 interview on Letterman's Late Night, when Glover tried to kick Dave in... 10 Responses | Other threads
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clips
Joaquin Phoenix's Letterman Disaster
Here's Joaquin Phoenix on David Letterman later tonight, either stoned out of his mind or just medically catatonic (or both). Letterman makes several heroic efforts to politely prompt Phoenix before ruthlessly mocking him. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by sadclown: This is still his best performance:+ Watch video 9 Responses | Other threads
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hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix's Director Recalls His Screamy, Charcoal-Eating Commitment
If you had any doubts that Joaquin Phoenix will push his hoaxy rapper persona into the depths of career ignominy, let his Two Lovers director fill you in on his insane level of commitment. More »
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Comment by fugit: so far i give him props....if it is fake... he's creating a good character in the process. like Dr. Steve Brule... more » | Other threads
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two lovers
Gwyneth Paltrow Unimpressed By Joaquin Phoenix's Cinematic Rapping
If Joaquin Phoenix really hopes to convince the world that he's the world's greatest undiscovered rapper (and not simply its least essential hoaxer), he may have to start with winning over Gwyneth Paltrow. More »
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Comment by RonMwangaguhunga: Joaquin: Gwyneth, I saw "Duets." I heard you singing "Cruising" with Huey Lewis. Do you really want to have this... 1 Responses | Other threads
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hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix Struggles To Keep Straight Face While Debunking Hoax Rumors
Like a weird uncle who gives his adult nephew a present that reads "From Santa," Joaquin Phoenix is still struggling to prop up a hoax-y music career that's way past its sell-by date. More »
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Comment by Colander: Defamer, stop trying to ruin Untitled Casey Affleck Career Suicide Project for me!!! 1 Responses | Other threads
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hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix's Hoax Denial Doesn't Actually Deny Anything
Now that everyone has finally called bullshit on Joaquin Phoenix, his rep has issued a denial of the rumor/CLEAR TRUE FACT that his music career is just a hoax. However, precious little is really denied: More » -
hoaxes
Other Publications Starting To Call Bullshit On Joaquin Phoenix
We hope we've adequately prepared you for this shock: Joaquin Phoenix's rap career may be an elaborate hoax. Yes, we've pointed this out before, but now, two sources are confirming the stunt to Entertainment Weekly: More »
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Comment by kookla: So, what you're saying is...Joaquin is the dude, playin' the dude, playin' the dude? 1 Responses | Other threads
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hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix's Rap Career Demands Punctuality, Crotch-Baring
We may never know whether Joaquin Phoenix donned oven mitts and rocked the Queer Lounge at Sundance, but today, we know far more about his disastrous "performance" in Las Vegas than we ever wanted to. More »
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Comment by Victor Ward: I was an extra for Walk the Line when they were filming here, so I sort of met him. By... 2 Responses | Other threads
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sundance
Did A Disguised Joaquin Phoenix Crash This Gay Sundance Party?
Many of you have wondered if the eccentric douchebag featured recently in our Sundance quotes roundup was none other than newly minted faux-idiot Joaquin Phoenix. Let's examine the evidence! More » -
hoaxes
Didn't We Call Bullshit On Joaquin Phoenix Already?
...Because he's still going through with this pretend "quitting acting to become a rap star" chicanery. In fact, THR has broken more news about this supposed life trajectory that we are simply refusing to believe: More »
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Comment by fishiejohnson: now he wants to string rhyming words together and speak them over a pre programmed casio beat? Respect! This guy... 1 Responses | Other threads
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joaquin phoenix
Time to Call Bullshit on Joaquin Phoenix's 'Retirement'
We'll admit that when Joaquin Phoenix first announced (in an incoherent mumble) that he would be quitting acting, we weren't quite sure whether it was all just an elaborate stunt. Then, we remembered the tale of Greenbo, Phoenix's brain-eating frog, and thought it was simply par for the course with the erratic actor. Still, since the announcement, Phoenix's weird behavior has felt increasingly staged for the cameras — and, in fact, he has his own cameras following him around, "recording his transition from film to music." The final straw came when we found an incriminating set of pictures from Phoenix's first performance, along with this explanation:
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Comment by HappyBlues: Could be just like SPINAL TAP... except more depressing and not funny. 2 Responses | Other threads
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Listicle
Who Will Replace Our Retiring Movie Stars?
Every movie star everywhere is quitting! In today's case of old Clint Eastwood it makes sense, because he's, y'know, old and his directing career has been a lot more illustrious than his acting career has for the past decade or so. But the once-promising, now-squandered Joaquin Phoenix? Baby mill Angelina Jolie? Nicole Kidman?? If they leave, then what are we to do? Find new movie stars, I guess. Trouble is, there aren't really any good, young understudies waiting in the wings. But there might be some! We'll take a look at who could replace these four retiring (or maybe semi-retiring) actors after the jump. More »
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Comment by Unfun: James McAvoy can replace Joaquin, because I said so. 9 Responses | Other threads
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joaquin phoenix
It's True: Joaquin Phoenix Wishes A Fond Bye!Good To Hollywood
We've been vexed, terribly vexed by Joaquin Phoenix's slurred proclamation to Extra that he planned to give up acting to follow in the illustrious, thesp rock footsteps of The Bacon Brothers and 30 Odd Foot of Grunts. Was he seriously quitting the business, or was it all a ruse for some forlorn, Sundance Channel takeoff of Punk'd? Then, at the Saturday AFI Fest part for Che, Phoenix did what any actor ready to leave Hollywood would do: a full red carpet press tour, complete with the hastily scrawled words "Bye!" and "Good" on opposite knuckles (perhaps he takes his sentence structure cues from the backwards "B"-sporting Ashley Todd). Said Phoenix to the AP: More »
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Comment by Cultmember: Judging from his general appearance, it look like he was recently bitten by a radioactive Jack Black. more » | Other threads
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joaquin phoenix
Joaquin Phoenix Retirement Announcement More Awkward Than We'd Ever Imagined
When Extra revealed on Tuesday that Joaquin Phoenix had announced his mumbled retirement from acting, little did we know that the video of said declaration (captured at Monday's Paul Newman charity benefit) would immediately enshrine itself in the annals of red carpet awkwardness forever. Thanks to a clip furnished by E!, we've got the entire, baffling experience, as an out-of-it Phoenix confesses all to Extra correspondent Jerry Penacoli, takes offense at Penacoli's disbelieving laughter, then storms off. More »
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Comment by logicalnoise: whatever more role for nathan fillion to get. 3 Responses | Other threads
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joaquin phoenix
Breaking! Joaquin Phoenix Quits Acting Forever To Pursue Garage Band Dreams
Though Joaquin Phoenix was once famously saved from a car wreck by wacko auteur Werner Herzog, apparently there's one aspect to the actor still in dangerous need of resuscitation: his love of acting. While attending a Paul Newman charity benefit last night, Phoenix told Extra that he's done, finished, finito with doing films, and he's got one shaky reason why: More » -
defamer
How Werner Saved Joaquin Phoenix, In His Own Words
Likely to nobody's surprise, Defamer's interlude last week with Werner Herzog yielded far more than just a few minutes' worth of feud-worthy slaps at his contemporary Abel Ferrara, whose Bad Lieutenant Herzog isremakingcontinuing later this year with Nicolas Cage. We also had the opportunity to get Herzog's side of a story first reported two years back by the L.A. Times, in which Joaquin Phoenix credited eyewitness Herzog for relaxing him after the actor rolled his car in Laurel Canyon. More »
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By STVComment by Justin K. Rivers: He should star in his own action franchise. more » | Other threads
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cannes film festival
Today in Cannes Hell: Gwyneth Paltrow's Breast, Critic Riots and a Word with Charlie Kaufman
With the minor exception of missing out on Jim Toback's documentary on Mike Tyson (which will screen here this fall anyway — we can wait), the only regret we have so far about sitting out the Cannes Film Festival is our absence at the mini-riot that preceded the press screening of director James Gray's drama Two Lovers, starring Joaquin Phoenix and Gwyneth Paltrow. That's when we're at our best, as were Lou Lumenick and the "major U.S. film critic" (*cough* Manohla Dargis *cough*) who apparently exclaimed, "I'm not going to wait an hour for f—-ing James Gray" before an ensuing screening delay, shoving match and seating free-for-all. More » -
Liv Lovers
Liv Tyler Gets Separated, But Her Rebound Prospects Look Strong
After all that hullabaloo following Liv Tyler’s missing wedding ring (and missing date) at Monday’s Costume Institute Gala, the dimpled rocker spawn has officially announced that she and husband of five years Royston Langdon "have confirmed their separation." Whether this means those divorce rumors from weeks ago will materialize or that the pair is just going on one of those godawful “breaks” that never work out (see: Swank/Lowe and Richards/Sheen) is unknown so far. But after we took a look at Liv’s previous paramours, we have a feeling Tyler will have no problem finding a worthy suitor. More »
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Comment by Leviticus_71: Being a dude...I would still snoogle Leonardo's Man Castle until I satisfied all of his dirtiest fantasies. The other three... more » | Other threads
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defamer
Mischievous Amazon Natives Have Their Way With A Passed-Out-Drunk Joaquin Phoenix
Pictured, an Italian Vanity Fair spread featuring a partially-nude former child star not likely to provoke the kinds of outrage elicited by the Miley Cyrus debacle. Rather, it features actor Joaquin Phoenix, in the process of receiving the tribal markings of the Yawanawa people of the Brazilian Amazon. (You'll recall indelible black markings figured prominently in his silent protest at this year's People's Choice Awards, as well.) Moments later, Phoenix was presented with an hallucinogenic tree toad—a ceremonial offering which he then licked greedily, causing one tribe elder to admonish him not to "Bogart the frog." His eyes then proceeded to dilate, and the actor giggled uncontrollably as he was promptly revisited by the large, amphibious friend who had once emerged from his hair on the Walk the Line red carpet. More »
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By SethComment by SteamyMcFirecrotch: Seriously, who among us hasn't woken up at least once freshman year looking like that?! more » | Other threads
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defamer
After watching the People's Choice Awards clip we posted a little while ago, a commenter points out that Favorite Leading Man honoree Joaquin Phoenix seems to have misspelled his own name—an error that serves to further illustrate the point about how utterly lost actors are without their writers. [Defamer]
