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Beloved actress Anne Hathaway embarked on a mini walk of shame outside of Coco De Ville Tuesday night. The Get Smart star, who recently split from con man & Zach Braff look alike Raffaello Follieri, allegedly had a lapse in judgment and gave reality TV maven Brody Jenner her number. At the valet station, Hathaway confessed to a BFF that she was suckered in by Jenner's frat boy charm. Hathaway sighed, "He had a backwards hat on and, well, I don't know....He just seemed like a guy who wouldn't be able pull off an elaborate con involving the Vatican, which is exactly the kind of guy I'm looking to rebound with. And he was wearing a backwards hat."

[Photo Credit: X17]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

In a scene eerily similar to the film Garden State, Zach Braff started to feel alienated from the crowd at LAX. As Braff headed toward the exit, the crowd started to slowly blur into a sea of shapes and figures. Braff said, "It made me feel like I was really alone in the world. You know, that it was just me with the problem and everybody else was fine and normal." It didn't help Braff's demeanor any when he got a phone call and realized that his mobile phone still defaults to an Imogen Heap ringtone.

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

I hated that character from the second she flounced on the screen. I remember distinctly Portman telling Zach Braff's character that she was "weird" and then doing a silly little dance to illustrate her "weirdness." Honestly? Anyone who telegraphs their so-called weirdness so outlandishly is not actually weird, they're merely quirky enough to be vaguely interesting without having their own thing going on. They're completely mainstream but have one really big tattoo, or occasionally sing really loud in the shower! "Oh, Natalie," the A.V. Club writes, "your unconventional ways are so inspiring, and your beauty is surprisingly non-threatening!"

As the A.V. Club deftly notes, "Like the Magical Negro, the Manic Pixie Dream Girl archetype is largely defined by secondary status and lack of an inner life. She's on hand to lift a gloomy male protagonist out of the doldrums, not to pursue her own happiness." Since they've defined it so succinctly, I've realized that many recent films employ the MPDG stock character — Forgetting Sarah Marshall, for instance, where Mila Kunis's character is a free spirited nymph deposited on the shores of Hawaii in order to encourage Jason Segel to write the vampire rock puppet musical he's been fantasizing about for years. But what of the dude? You know, the brooding artsy loser in need of a MPDG to revive his creative and sexual juices? The ones who use MPDG's to stroke their fragile egos and project their muse-fantasies on? What should we call him? I think he deserves a name because these movies, and the notion of the MPDG, are really about him: his needs, his desires, his artistic endeavors.

Wimpster, while appropriate, lacks the specificity of MPDG and also is so four years ago. Maybe the new bromantics, because that term emphasizes their dudeliness but also their childish notions of romantic attachment? In any event, these self-absorbed whiners are to be avoided in real life, though, like (adorable!) Jason Segal in FSM, new bromantics can be charming in film.

Wild Things: 16 Films Featuring Manic Pixie Dream Girls [AV Club]
Soapbox [The Petite Sophisticate]
Meet The Wimpster [The Black Table]

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Scrubs star Zach Braff was spotted leaving Hollywood nightspot Villa over the weekend in bit of a daze. Braff reportedly mumbled under his breath multiple times about a desire to get a burger which was so followed by shouts of "Anybody up for Astro Burgers? Astro Burger! Come on! Astro Burger!" Braff's friends shrugged their shoulders and suggested In-N-Out instead. Braff scoffed, then quickly agreed, citing that he could so go for animal style fries.

[Photo Credit: WENN]

1. Zach Braff: Conquests include Drew Barrymore, Shiri Appleby, Sarah Chalke, Mandy Moore, Bonnie Somerville and Kirsten Dunst.

2. Brandon Davis: Hit it (and subsequently quit it) with Mischa Barton, model Caroline Vreeland, Miranda Kerr, Harrod's heiress Camilla Al Fayed and model Cheyenne Tozzi.

3. Cisco Adler: Dating history includes Mischa Barton, Kimberly Stewart and Lauren Conrad.

4. Dax Shepard: Rumoured to have slept with Kate Hudson, Kirsten Bell, Tara Lipinski and Ione Skye.

5. Marilyn Manson: Got biblical with Dita Von Teese, Evan Rachel Wood, Rose McGowan and Jenna Jameson.

[Source: Who's Dated Who]

• HOW DOES ZACH BRAFF BAG HOT CHICKS? [ONTD]

It goes on:

"I haven't had a vacation in 6 years and so I decided to take June and July off. I am having the best summer of my life! I am so happy here!

I'm hanging out with my New York friends, my Jersey boys, my family and loving every single second of it. And yes; I am dating. When we shoot Scrubs I spend every waking hour of my life in an abandoned and haunted hospital. All I can date there are ghosts and they tend to be horrible snugglers. So anyway, blah, blah, blah. Don't believe the hype.

I love it here. I love NYC. I love the people, the arts, I love meeting strangers on the street and talking about the most random things in the world, I love parades where people dress up as mermaids and I really love peach/pomegranate iced tea. I see quite clearly that the east coast is a slightly better fit for me.

That is all for now. I am going to buy a bike.

Peace and love. And as always, thank you for all the many kind things you write to me. You are the best fans a fellow could ever ask for."

The multihyphenate has cut a one-year deal with "Scrubs" producer ABC TV Studio that will pay him in the neighborhood of $350,000 per episode for the 2007-08 season of "Scrubs," sources said. Braff's deal is contingent on NBC picking up the single-camera comedy for a seventh year, which is expected.

If so, Braff's new deal would put him in the top echelon of highest-paid male actors on television, alongside "Two and a Half Men" star Charlie Sheen, whose paycheck also is in the $350,000-per-episode range for the Warner Bros. TV-produced CBS sitcom.

Whether or not you're a Scrubs fan or think Braff is worth the hefty raise, it's disturbing to be reminded once again that the paycheck of Two and a Half Men's mumble-mouthed star is officially the benchmark for overpaying TV actors. As such, at some point in the negotiations for Braff's new deal, his agent at CAA probably angrily hung up the phone after uttering the threat, "Listen, unless you come back to us with Charlie Sheen Money by the end of the day, I fucking swear to you my client will walk off the set and spend all of next year doing nothing but making those shitty movies where he sits around in a doorway crying his puppy-dog eyes out during a conveniently timed rainstorm because he just can't figure out what it all means. Neither of us wants that, so get back to me when you're serious about making this happen."

• Braff cleans up with 'Scrubs' payday [THR]

Deep into Friday afternoon or not, it's never too late to burn a post share a video gem with our readers, such as the above mash-up of the trailers of The Last Kiss and Apocalypto into one, Zach-Braffian-fever-dream about a South American road trip we can only assume was cut short when a Mayan priest tore Braff's still-beating heart off his sleeve. To beef up the Braff-bashing hilarity, we're also including, free of charge, this Onion AV Club's list of "Awful Things Zach Braff Is (Probably) Responsible For," which, at three entries, seemed to us woefully underresearched, yet still managed to provoke some lively debate in the comments section over the relative awfulness of Scrubs. Enjoy.

• BWE Presents (Again): Zach Braff's Apolocalyto [BWE]
• Awful Things Zach Braff Is (Probably) Responsible For [AV Club]

• Zach Braff: A guy you want to slap? [CNN.com/AP]

While watching the trailer for the upcoming Paul Haggis-penned, Zach Braff vehicle, The Last Kiss, The Not-So-Exciting Life of Brian Palmer blog was struck with a stifling sense of déjà vu. No, they weren't thinking of L'Ultimo bacio, the Italian movie upon which it's based, but rather Braff's own disaffected-young-adult-love-story, Garden State. After painstakingly juxtaposing several highly congruous stills from both films, the Palmer blog then set out to transliterate a definitive handbook for what is quickly becoming a genre unto itself, naming their handy guide Zach Braff's 10 Easy Tips for Writing Films About Twenty-Somethings®. An excerpt:

3. The perfect catalyst for change should come in the form of a small, perky, impossibly cute, dark-haired Jewess, who, for some inexplicable reason, is deeply attracted to the protagonist, despite the fact that his personality is about as exciting as a soggy peanut butter sandwich. [...]

6. The protagonist should close his eyes often and meditate on when his life wasn't ruled by the debilitating pain of wondering how to connect with other people, or whether he should get married and have kids.

One could chalk much of this up to mere coincidence—after all, a two-time-Oscar-winning master-of-the-obvious like Haggis needn't pilfer ideas from the droopy-faced kid from Scrubs. According to IMdB, however, Braff has admitted to having "tweaked the dialog a little bit", so perhaps there are Braffian influences at play during Rachel Bilson's stirring speech about the velocity of life, which was originally conceived by the screenwriter as a foul-mouthed tirade against the scourge of immigration currently plaguing the country.

• The Gardening [BrianMPalmer.com]