In the middle of the greatest economic downturn since the Great Depression, American handed over $35.3 million worthof its unemployment payments to Vaughn, Favreau and the gang. And honestly, its not for us we grieve; its for the children, who the reckless audiences of this weekend have thus doomed to approximately 27 more Vaughn films featuring him being hectored by a dismally joyless spouse who forces him to go somewhere uptight and boring, disrupting his playtime with even more hapless sidekick who is being driven close to suicide by his even more dismally joyless spouse. The children of tomorrow, when they reach PG-13 eligibility, will look back on the decisions America made today and curse our spirits, willing us to wander the earth unburied and unmourned for all eternity.

In their write-ups, the box office pundits are all but dying to avert their eyes from the Vaureau nightmare and talk about the far more trendworthy story of Paranormal Activity's viral driven success. Playing in college towns on a mere 160 screens (compared to Couples Retreat's 3000), the low-budget horror film raked in 7.1 million dollars, a number that Box Office Mojo's Brandon Gray says,

broke the minor record for highest-grossing weekend ever for a movie playing at less than 200 theaters, exceeding Platoon's $3.7 million at 174 sites (which would be on par adjusted for ticket-price inflation).

There's nothing the showbiz press likes better than a marketing phenomenon. It's been a decade since Blair Witch came along and turned the dominant paradigm on its head and changed showbiz forever, kinda. I mean, it was huge, right?...And three years since Snakes on a Plane reset..since Snakes on a Plane....Well, anyway.

Also astounding on the weekend chart is the number of recently mega-hyped films that seem miles away from catching fire. Bruce Willis' big-budget Surrogates is fading away in the 30 million range, likely a fraction of the total cost. Miles of ink and solid word of mouth don't seem to be able to propel Whip It over the ten million line, Fame is sputtering away at 20. And the latest Michael Moore is losing steam at 9 million; swell for a doc but less than a tenth his Fahrenheit heights.

COUPLES RETREAT
The Story: Four couples venture to a idyllic island retreat where they are forced to confront what ails their troubled relationships.
The Pitch: He's Just Not Into You meets Wedding Crashers
Who It's For: Stagnating mid-life couples seeking 90 minutes of release from their private hell in mocking the private hells of other mid-life couples.
Cause for Hope: Actually a couple of mild laughs in the trailer; Veronica Mars has not quite worn out her welcome yet.
Cause for Concern: It will not end here. Vaughn has at least three other comedies already in development.
Defamer Enthusio-Meter: 3

AN EDUCATION
The Story: A teenage girl in Swinging 60's London falls for a debonair suitor (Peter Sarsgaard) twice her age.
The Pitch: Georgy Girl meets Manhattan
Who It's For: The Smart Set
Cause for Hope: No movie set London in the Swinging 60's has ever been there. (No, the Austin Powers films weren't actually set there, so they don't count.)
Cause for Concern: Early Oscar buzz is generally a harbinger of mind-numbing tedium ahead.
Defamer Enthusio-Meter: 8

GOOD HAIR
The Story: Chris Rock fronts a documentary exploring the complex world of African Americans' hair issues.
The Pitch: Fast Food Nation meets Beauty Parlor
Who It's For: Comedy enjoyers and documentary fans alike.
Cause for Hope: Fascinating, under-discussed topic; restores the hope for the comic documentary genre nearly bludgeoned to death by Michael Moore polemics.
Cause for Concern: If we wanted to learn, we'd go to school.
Defamer Enthusio-Meter: 8

THE DAMNED UNITED
The Story: A soccer coach (Michael Sheen) takes on the most successful team in the UK in the 1970's, and makes waves challenging their style of play.
The Pitch: Victory meets The Full Monty
Who It's For: Yobs and the yanks who love them.
Cause for Hope: From Peter Morgan, the screenwriter of The Queen and Frost/Nixon.
Cause for Concern: Soccer still just seems like a bunch of guys jogging around a big field and never scoring.
Defamer Enthusio-Meter: 7

BRONSON
The Story: The based-on-truth story of a British perpetual prison inmate who makes violence his art form.
The Pitch: Clockwork Orange meets Swimming to Cambodia
Who It's For: Any remaining Brit film fans who haven't been swallowed up this weekend by An Education or Damned United.
Cause for Hope: Looks crazy and weird enough to possibly break through the doldrums of Britain's overworked geezers and guns genres.
Cause for Concern: Viewers are cautioned that Guy Ritchie flashbacks are extremely possible.
Defamer Enthusio-Meter: 6

WHAT'S NEW: Speaking of recipes, Four Christmases sure has a fresh one! Mix Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn. Add two cups of diced ensemble players including Robrt Duvall, Jon Favreau, Kristin Chenoweth and Sissy Spacek. Flavor with ball-kicking, pratfall and baby-vomit jokes. Bake for two hours. Serve lukewarm. It's good for about $40 million over five days. Transporter 2 is a little simpler hors d'oeurve for the guys out there, with Jason Statham liberally seasoned with bullets, quick cuts and decibels, turning out $18 million before the main course on DVD.

But if you're allergic to the multiplex, you may be best best suited to skip ahead to this week's new home video releases; the art-house kitchen appears to be closed to deliveries for the holiday weekend.

THE BIG LOSER: Australia is almost three hours' worth of the expansive (and expensive, at $130 million) hisorical epic no one makes anymore. And despite Oprah Winfrey's lavish endorsement, there's a reason for that: It's one in a generation that actually finds any traction in the two female quadrants whose repeat viewings push it toward box-office longevity and, almost necessarily, Oscar luster. Fox needs half a Titanic here (thus its Hugh Jackman heartthrob push at non-starter Nicole Kidman's expense) to make this work, and for the sake of the studio and director Baz Luhrmann and all involved, we hope they get it. But the middling, $26 million reality — especially on Twilight's likely second week at No. 1 — is what it is.

THE UNDERDOG: Instant-message quibbles aside, Milk is far and away the best thing opening this weekend; expect sell-outs and a per-screen average of at least $39,000 in 17 markets. (It opens wide Dec. 12.)

FOR SHUT-INS: This week's new DVD's include Will Smith's brooding hero Hancock, the summer champs Meet Dave and Space Chimps, more Vaughn holiday frolic in Fred Claus, the TV knockoffs A Colbert Christmas and 24: Redemption, and just in time for the holidays/white-elephant gift exchange, Beverly Hills 90210: The Complete Sixth Season.

So will your Turkey Day food coma overlap into moviegoing? Is it more of a football-and-shopping weekend, or will the budgie-smuggling pull of Australia be just too challenging to withstand? In any event, have a fantastic holiday, and should you brave Space Chimps, please let us know what we're missing.

The thing is, Chris Jones is not alone in his bromantic feelings towards Vince's golden acreage. To most "dudes," Vince Vaughn is the kind of guy they want to befriend, or even better, the kind of guy they want to be. He was even given the "The Golden Mantlers" and inducted into the Guy's Hall of Fame by Spike TV. But why has the dude demographic, a demographic which is generally not comfortable with expressing same sex affection, professed its undying love for this gargantuan funnyman? We parsed the Esquire article and figured it out.

1. He's good looking, but not too good looking, and certainly not girly looking. He's a big hunka virile man.

His hair rises like a wave above the low-tide beach that is his forehead. (He calls it his fivehead.) His face is full, puffy enough to make him sometimes look as though he's fighting to keep his eyes open—not as though he's just woken up but as though he's never bothered to go to bed in the first place. it.

2. Vaughn dresses like a slob and is still able to pull down famous, quality ladies, like Jennifer Aniston, Joey Lauren Adams, and by some accounts Cameron Diaz.

He wears a pair of old-school Nike sneakers that could be used as war canoes. About…Even from across this crowded restaurant, it's possible to see a jumbo slice of Vaughn's naked belly. It's too much to ignore, this great golden acreage, because he leads with it and because it's probably been kissed by Jennifer Aniston, standing on her tippy-toes. The man doesn't just occupy airspace; he fills it.

3. And speaking of ladies! Vaughn makes sorta lame frattish jokes a lot but he's good natured enough to get away with it. Like this conversation between Vince and bff Jon Favreau. Didja know? Wives are naggy and annoying!

"Are you done having kids?" Vaughn asks.
"Yeah, I'm done."
"You're not going to pull the goalie ever again?"
"No. Joy says, 'It's wife number two if you want more kids.' "
"Then you would have to move to, like, some Islamic country where you could have another wife," Vaughn says.
"Or nowhere. I could do the Hollywood thing, just hit reset."
"Or you could move into Warren Jeffs territory."
"I could set up a compound?"
"Yeah," Vaughn says, "a compound. That was so disturbing. You see all these little girls who look like extras from Little House on the Prairie. It's like Half Pint's been putting out for everybody. . . . "
"Polygamy seems appealing," Favreau says, "but then I've been watching that show Big Love, and you realize it's the same headaches."
"It's triple the headaches. Triple the nagging. Triple the question, What are you thinking?"
"Yeah, one marriage is enough," Favreau says.

4. But finally, the reason so many dudes love Vince Vaughn is because underneath all that golden-hued bluster, he's really just a sad clown. Dudes can wholeheartedly get behind Vaughn because he's not confident 100% of the time. Even the most hardened bro needs to shed a tear every now and again.

Just then, Vince Vaughn looks the way a big man looks when someone stands up to him for the first time in his life. He looks like a man who knows that he can cover only so much ground, that even giants have their limits. He looks like a man who knows he will have to pick a side. He looks suddenly smaller. He still looks a lot like Vince Vaughn, only built to scale.

Vince Vaughn: The Biggest Man In The Room [Esquire]

VINCE VAUGHN LOOKS A LOT LIKE VINCE VAUGHN, ONLY BIGGER...His face is full, puffy enough to make him sometimes look as though he's fighting to keep his eyes open—not as though he's just woken up but as though he's never bothered to go to bed in the first place. His shirt is open at the collar, probably because it has to be. It's also open at the waist. Even from across this crowded restaurant, it's possible to see a jumbo slice of Vaughn's naked belly. It's too much to ignore, this great golden acreage, because he leads with it and because it's probably been kissed by Jennifer Aniston, standing on her tippy-toes.

Yes, well, that's surely a mental image that won't go away! However, the writer is not yet done pounding home Vaughn's bloat. Gorge on these excerpts:

· He's the biggest man in the room. And because of his size, and because he inherited from his salesman father a competitive streak as well as a knack for volume business, he is voracious in his appetites (steak and lobster and creamed spinach) and his desires (to be loved).

· He sinks deeper into the couch, exhausted by his lies.

· There is only one question that Vaughn will answer without reservation. He answered it the night before, at the steakhouse, underscoring every elaborately constructed sentence, paragraph, and punctuation mark with a forkful of lobster meat...

· He swells up and starts shouting again.

· Favreau shows up and Vaughn makes room for him on the couch. He's just wearing a T-shirt and jeans, sucking on a mint for lunch, ready to go to work. It's funny seeing them like this, the two guys from Swingers at their ten-year reunion, a little older, a little fatter, a little tired-seeming and wrung out.

· And just then, Vince Vaughn looks the way a big man looks when someone stands up to him for the first time in his life.

"...Like a fat dude caught stuffing cake in his mouth," right? We're just guessing!

• Vince graces the cover of Esquire magazine [Vince-Vaughn.com]

After the jump: Vince Vaughn is ready to tackle his most dramatic role since Norman Bates.

· Sony reported a 72% profit drop, a loss attributed to the weakening U.S. dollar and [Variety]
· Vince Vaughn will star in Sunny and 68, from Pride and Glory writer/director Gavin O'Connor, a "drama with comedic undertones" about a guy who goes to his childhood home a bottomed-out poker champion, but emerges a man. [Variety]

After the jump: Which of NBC's homoerotically-charged new series just got a full season pickup?

· Graphic novel Freaks of the Heartland, a Midwestern tale of "horrible secrets" about a monstrous six-year-old, will be adapted for the screen by Pineapple Express director David Gordon Green, who's also writing the adaptation of frat-hazing memoir Goat. [THR]
· NBC ordered nine more episodes of Knight Rider, the first new NBC show to get a full-season pickup. Because it's so awesome! Have you seen what that car can do? [THR]

Boomp3.com

Life must be a permanent vacation for Smart Water spokesperson Jennifer Aniston. Aniston felt that another vacation as on the white sand beaches of Mexico was in order to fully get over the recent split from dorm rock crooner John Mayer, but Aniston still hasn’t been able to shake his memory. Aniston said, “I walk into the resort and somebody at the bar is doing that karaoke thing and they’re doing one of the songs by that joker. Then at dinner, a mariachi band plays another one of his songs. I may have to go to the South Pole if I want to get away from all of my exes.” Then Aniston remembered that it’s cold down at the South Pole and she’s not a fan of snow pants.

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Is it simply that studios are too terrified to give a woman first billing over a male star, lest people then think the film to be a chick flick? After all, Vaughn's last hit was The Break-Up, the rare romantic comedy with strong male appeal, something that marketing folks might have felt was in jeopardy had costar Jennifer Aniston been first-billed. Four Christmases isn't a romcom but a flat-out comedy, but would it be perceived as the former if Vaughn was subservient to Witherspoon in the billing block?

Yes, when compared to Witherspoon, the presence of Vaughn in this film makes us more likely to see it (though still? not very likely), simply because the actor has a track record of enlivening even the most formulaic films with his improvised comic riffs. Still, we wonder just how B- and C-list you'd have to go to find a male costar whom the studio would allow Witherspoon to supplant. In an alternate Four Christmases, could the actress vault over Colin Farrell to claim first billing? Or will she have to settle for a part opposite Freddie Prinze Jr. to claim what, by rights, should be hers?

boomp3.com

While out with friends in Venice over the weekend, Vince Vaughn was brought up to speed with celebratory hand gestures. The Rudy star felt the need to high five after joke he made, but his friend told Vaughn that all the kids pound it or bump knuckles these days. The friend quickly taught the basic elements of pounding to Vaughn which he enjoyed. Vaughn said, "I can see why everybody likes this. Cuts down on the germs."

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

In today's installment: Cameron Diaz, Katherine Heigl, Vince Vaughn, Pam Anderson, Sharon Stone, Dave Chappelle, Corey Feldman, Jonah Hill, Eric Mabius, Eli Roth, Pete Wentz, Dane Cook, Fabio, Tim Robbins, Bo Derek, Bret McKenzie, Lucy Liu, Tara Reid, Rachel Zoe, JC Chasez, T.R. Knight, Jonny Lee Miller and Angelyne!

MONDAY, JUNE 16
· Went to the Grove to see a movie when I noticed a tall dark haired man making out with a pretty young blonde who didn't look a day over 18. After a couple takes I realized it was creepy horror film director Eli Roth. He looks more attractive in person, I must admit. He and the young blonde went into The Happening. From what I have gathered, they both seemed really uninterested in the movie (which was horrible by the way) and more interested in sucking face. Maybe because his girlfriend is in high school, she's used to hooking up in movie theaters?

THURSDAY, JUNE 19
· Driving north on La Brea from Slauson I saw in the passenger seat of the car behind me the unmistakable head of Jonah Hill (Feldstein). I changed one lane over so I could see him from the side. He seemed to be annoyed by my pointing at him and had the driver of the car (female) look over at me to laugh. I was just wondering what he was doing so far south...

FRIDAY, JUNE 20
· Pam Anderson was taking in the Dodgers/Indians game in the Dugout seats tonight. She was with her 2 boys, who looked just old enough for their friends to tell them there's a video on the internet of their dad driving a boat with his penis. Also, a goateed Ben Silverman sitting nearby dressed like a 15-year old, with some girl.

· Saw Tara Reid eating lunch with two European looking types at that French cheese place in the old Farmers Market on Fairfax. Damn, that girl looked cute and smiled at my tow headed kid. Really, she was eating.

SATURDAY, JUNE 21
· Saw Cameron Diaz at Home Restaurant on Hillhurst enjoying some outdoor Saturday afternoon brunch. She had hashbrowns on her plate! Skinny celebs eat real food! How?! Honestly though, she was looking good.

· In the midst of the heat wave, Flight of the Conchords' Bret McKenzie (a.k.a., the cute one) at The Waffle on Sunset, huddled in a booth with five or six friends. Couldn't see what he was eating.

SUNDAY, JUNE 22
· Last night, at Swinger's cafe, saw Dave Chappelle eating dinner outside with a male friend. They had quite a spread going w/ french toast, waffles, and milkshakes. The kind of dinner one might order after some "happy cigarettes." ;) Chappelle seemed in a lively mood, walking around and chatting with a few people. He looked good. I wish he'd get back on TV.

· I know it's been forever, but I had to contribute: Was at the beach all day today, escaping the god awful heat, and wandered around as Will Rogers Beach emptied around sunset... and I see an adorable Eric Mabius carrying his adorable son piggyback around the beach... priceless. Maybe celebrities are not all horrible people.

MONDAY, JUNE 23
· Saw Vince Vaughn at the Greek for the Robert Plant/Allison Krauss show. He was exchanging pleasantries with Ray director and Mr. Helen Mirren, Taylor Hackford. I like to think they were discussing a possible Fred Claus 2 in which Vince's character is rendered blind after seeing Fred Claus and becomes the most beloved blues singer in the North Pole. Saw a fan come up to tell Vince how much he likes his work and Vince took some time to chat. That was so money.

· Pete Wentz at LAFF's Monday night sold-out showing of Choke. He stayed until Clark Gregg and surprise guest Chuck Palahniuk finished their Q and A, trying to get out quickly before the audience rush. At first just thought, "hmm, that little man looks like Pete Wentz" until he took a picture with a fan. Dude is WEE, but I thought it was cool he stayed for the Q and A and didn't act like a dick about pictures. My standards are so low.

TUESDAY, JUNE 24
· I saw Rachel Zoe looking as angry as crushed velvet leaving the post-premiere party for The Wackness at the W in Westwood. Was she denied entry or was it just what I was wearing?

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 25
· At George Michael's show at the Forum, there was a delectable mix of celebs in the Forum Club during intermission and after the show. You had the older actresses in Bo Derek and Sharon Stone, tv hostesses in Daisy Fuentes & Debbie Matenopoulous, former boy bander in JC Chasez, Eli Stone himself Jonny Lee Miller & his pregnant fiance (wife?) Michelle Hicks, & most importantly Corey Feldman. Corey walked around with his enormous sunglasses around while dragging around his wife by the hand just looking for attention.

THURSDAY, JUNE 26
· Pete Wentz hiding his face and pretending like I cared who he was at the Rite Aid on Fairfax and Sunset. Considered following him to see what he was buying, but then I was distracted by something much more interesting: Kleenex.

· While waiting for an elevator in the 8000 Sunset parking garage, one finally arrived and produced ape-comic Dane Cook and one of his "bros", fresh from a work-out at Crunch.

SATURDAY, JUNE 28
· 1000 year old Angelyne was pulled over in front of my loft 5 minutes ago on Cahuenga and Melrose. They searched her trunk. Another squad car pulled up to join the search!!

· Just saw Fabio @ Equinox on Sunset. If only I knew George Clooney's number, I could have texted him to come over and beat him up.

TUESDAY, JULY 1
· As I was leaving the Arclight after the horriblenessness that is Wanted (seriously, the Loom of Fate?!?!), saw Katherine Heigl and her hags, T.R. Knight and his ward, Mark Cornelson, leaving. She was trying to go incognito wearing glasses, but looked very fit. T.R. and the ward looked pretty gay and short. No sign of lapdog, Josh Kelley.

UNDATED
· It was actually a couple of weeks ago...walking down Franklin Ave on my way to Mayfair Market, I saw none other than Fabio himself, sitting at that little Japanese restaurant. Hair: still luxurious, but not as long as in his heyday.

· Two weeks ago, spotted Tim Robbins at Kika sushi on Larchmont. Let me just say, he is hot. Sarandon is a lucky lady! Side note: I happened to catch Robbins' stage production of 1984 this
weekend, which is fantastic.

· A few weeks ago, I saw Lucy Liu with a male companion at Vegan Glory, this random little cafe in a mini-mall by house. She looked beautiful, as always.

As Us informs us today, the former nose candy aficionado who was rumored to spend Nelson Mandela fundraisers traipsing in and out of bathroom stalls with Kate Moss, is the current bedmate du jour of boy-crazy Cameron (who thinks "sex is the best" like OMG!). The supposedly clean Sculfor spent a few weeks slowly chipping away at Aniston's already damaged little heart after everything went sour with Vince Vaughn.

As for Diaz, the supposedly matured John Mayer spent a few weeks wiping away her post-Timberlake tears most likely in an effort to obtain as much rebound sex as possible. But back in 2003, good old Vince was the one wiping away another set of Diaz tears, this time caused by detox dieter Jared Leto.

Vince Vaughn, you charming devil, you. Now we understand why you turned down that threesome with Owen Wilson. Because when it comes to schtupping celebrity blonde singletons over the age of 30 in Hollywood, you are so money! You don't need his help after all.

[Photo credits: Wireimage, Splash]

• CAMERON DIAZ'S PDA-PACKED DATE WITH JENNIFER ANISTON'S EX [Us]

In today's installment: Britney Spears, Jeremy Piven, Paris Hilton, Vince Vaughn, Jack Black, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Luke Wilson, David Beckham, Dennis Hopper, Gwen Stefani, Cuba Gooding Jr., Jeff Goldblum, Zooey Deschanel, Rainn Wilson, Giovanni Ribisi, Judy Greer, Phil Spector, Kevin Federline, Morgan Spurlock, Kristen Chenoweth, Judy Greer, Cloris Leachman, John Slattery, Emma Stone, Bijou Philips, Jane Lynch, Dean Cain, John Corbett, Paul Scheer, and more.

SATURDAY, MAY 24
While surrounded by Brody Jenner-looking date
rapists at Happy Endings, I spotted a welcomed sight: Seth Morris, Owen Burke, and Paul Scheer. Joined by a bunch of other UCB comic types upstairs in the corner and looking almost as out of place as me.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 4
Saw Cloris Leachman at the Aqua Lounge watching Jeff Goldblum and his band play some jazz standards. Jeff's pretty talented on the keyboard, but the group as a whole made me feel like I was at someone's wedding.

Wednesday afternoon, my friend and I are having our usually mid-week lunch time phone conversation. In mid-conversation he gasps and tells me that he is at Chipotle in BH and David Beckham has just walked in. No f''ing way! David F'ing Beckham in Chipotle! BTW - what's up with that family and Mexican food? Just wish I could get shot in person of David's burrito! hehe

FRIDAY, JUNE 6
Vince Vaughn at the Greek Theatre for A Prairie Home Companion on June 6. Thinking he's a Garrison Keillor fan definitely makes me like him a little more.

Driving on Ledgewood in Hollywoodland today, I saw Phil Spector driving a Mercedes convertible, wearing that crazy giant curly fright wig he dropped in favor of the lesbian pageboy thing he wore in court. He wears it while driving a convertible! How the hell do you bolt that on?

Cuba Gooding Jr. with 2 friends eating sushi at Hana Sushi in Brentwood. He was a lot smaller than I thought he would be and was definately enjoying his wine. He was nice to everyone that came up and talked with him. He was abnormally excited about going to Q's (the pool bar next door). Oh wait, it was beer pong night. I'd be excited too!

SUNDAY, JUNE 8
Judy Greer (aka Kitty from Arrested Development) spotted Friday night at St Nick's Pub on 3rd st, sitting in a booth with friends. Had to stop myself from making a George Bluth reference.

MONDAY, JUNE 9
I love the show Mad Men, so what a thrill to spot Sterling Cooper honcho John Slattery getting his caffeine on at the Starbucks on Main Street in Santa Monica.

TUESDAY, JUNE 10
Former TV Superman Dean Cain swooping down into Beverly Hills for some shopping at Tom's Toys on Beverly Drive.

THURSDAY, JUNE 12
Saw John Corbett at LAX on Thursday. T-shirt, jeans, boots, with tinted Ray-Bans at the Hudson Books. Tall with a paunch that looks just right on him. Looks like a very hip carpenter. No one seemed to notice him even though he's a pretty big dude.

At the Palms in Vegas for a little work and a little fun, CineVegas is happening. I caught the opening night film, The Rocker, and went to the after party at Moon and the cast was there. Emma Stone is stunning in person, her waist is teeny and her skin is all Hollywood teen glow, she was hanging out with who I think was her mom. Jane Lynch was in a cool 50's style dress with pockets, lady is tall and very animated when she talks. Open bar here is a dangerous thing.

I was having dinner at the Mel's on Sunset Blvd. across from Ketchup. As me and my boyfriend got up to leave, I heard an easily recognizable voice. I look down and sitting at a booth with a couple of her friends was the star of Broadway's Wicked and ABC's Pushing Daisies, Kristin Chenoweth. She looked adorable as ever!

FRIDAY, JUNE 13
Around 8 am, I passed the front desk at The Palms and saw Dennis Hopper talking to who I assume was his assistant. He looks good for an older guy, white hair, sharply dressed, short and holding onto a bottle of water. I then head to the elevator and walk past Rainn Wilson in red wayfarers and a golf shirt, he's tall and funny looking, the same as one would imagine. Seemed like he had a long night and was asking where the Coffee Bean was. Later in the day, Bill Pullman came through the casino in a navy blazer, he stopped and took photos with people. There was a CineVegas anniversary party at the Palms Place pool. Hopper, George Maloof and tons of people were there including some guy with a cat perched on his shoulder and Britney Spears. She was seated in a cabana with a velvet rope in front of it where two HUGE security guys minded her and a few friends. She was in a black cocktail dress and sat sipping her drink and was surprisingly pretty. The fake tan didn't look so fake and she looked like she had been styled for the night. I wouldn't have noticed her had it not been for the rope. The whole thing was weird. Like walking past a diorama in the Natural History Museum...The Britney Exhibit. She sat watching the party happen and the party peered at her like she was some kind endangered species....and of course, Prince Paul kept interrupting his set to play her music. Tres surreal.

Jeremy Piven looking very chubby at Zen Zoo, on Vine.

Lunchtime in Beverly Hills near the Chipotle, I THINK I saw Jack Black coming down the sidewalk. He was carrying a bag of fast food, unlike other Bev Hills denizens, who carry bags of ugly empire-waisted dresses. I wasn't super certain it was him...but then I saw that belly, that belly that practically got second billing on Nacho Libre. I hope it was him as I said "Hello, awesome!" as we passed each other on the sidewalk. If it was just another chubby dude, then THAT was terribly embarrassing...

Luke Wilson looking extremely hot at my local pavillion supermarket in Santa Monica. Drove off in his illegally tinted silver porsche and while at the red light, kept raising and lowering his window like he couldn't decide if he wanted to be noticed. Looking very sexy tho.

SATURDAY, JUNE 14
Britney at Palms Place in Vegas. There with one of her enablers and a Russian bodyguard. She was chain smoking cigarettes and eating chicken fingers as she sat by the pool. It's true — she's all class.

Saw Giovanni Ribisi at the carwash on Vermont and Prospect. He smoked a cigarette and read a script while he waited for his car. He kept to himself and was completely unassuming so much so I almost feel guilty sending in this sighting. I wasn't able to see what type of car he drives as my car was finished before his.

At the valet stand at Planet Hollywood, I waited for my keys and looked to my left, there standing beside me was Kevin Federline. He's a little guy, wearing his requisite white t-shirt and baggy shorts. Wasn't impressed. Probably not a coincidence that Britney is in town too. Later that night at the Palms, I saw Bijou Philips perform at another CineVegas party. She sang for a little while and hung out by the pool, her voice wasn't half bad. Spotted Traci Lords waiting for an elevator in stilettos and a tight black dress, she has aged insanely well.

SUNDAY, JUNE 15
In Planet Hollywood, I saw Dwayne Johnson tan, lean and HOT coming down the main escalator going to a screening of Get Smart. He's tall and surprisingly good looking, not bulky or wrestler-esque. He stopped and signed autographs in the casino and had a seriously huge entourage.

Back at the Palms, I saw a sunburned Morgan Spurlock by the pool, handlebar moustache in full effect. Passed by Beastie Boy MCA (Adam Yauch) on the casino floor.

MONDAY, JUNE 16
I saw Vincent Kartheiser of Mad Men on the Continental redeye from Newark to LAX. He was dressed just like Pete Campbell in a brown suit and vintage skinny tie, and bopping around the terminal to whatever was on his iPod. Staying in his character's groove I guess, he was only slightly more subdued once on board (first class of course). Much better looking in person than on the show, but an occasional burger wouldn't kill him - the guy is rail thin.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 18
Last night I saw doe-eyed indie goddess/ingenue Zooey Deschanel at the Rilo Kiley Show at the Greek. Looked absolutely stunning (and happy), wearing a gorgeous green dress.

THURSDAY, JUNE 19
As we were leaving Juvenex Spa in Manhattan at 9pm, Paris Hilton was just coming in. She was all dressed up and decked out. I guess with the stress of being Paris she needed a massage.

Saw Gwen Stefani and family (including her dad) enjoying dinner at Buddha's Belly on Beverly last night (6/19). Aside from the few annoying paparazzi outside, they were pretty much left alone. Gwen looked gorgeous without all of that caked on makeup!

Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet: Followers include ridiculously skin-and-bones supe Gisele Bundchen, weight loss master Robin Quivers and the muscular Madonna. The 21-day detox promises devotees to shed 21 pounds in that many days "by subsisting on live juices, enzymes - and regular colonics." Fun!

The Master Cleanser: Reportedly what Beyonce used in order to nab her Dreamgirls role, Vince Vaughn allegedly follows the lemon juice liquid diet, and Jared Leto shed his Chapter 27 weight by drinking the "water mixed with lemon, maple syrup and cayenne pepper" cocktail as well. Yum!

Dr. Joshi's Holistic Detox: Fans include the clavicle-flashing Gwyneth Paltrow, original waif Kate Moss and currently slim Ralph Fiennes. The main focus is avoiding acidic and toxic foods, but the downside hardly sounds worth it, and sort of explains Kate's moody expressions in photo after photo: "Users report headaches, stomach pains, nausea and fatigue." Even more fun!

[Photo credits: Getty, Wireimage, FilmMagic]

• CELEB DETOX DIETS MAY PROVE HARD TO SWALLOW [NYDN]

As the Mail points out, Cox was allegedly "disapproving" when it came to beefy Owen Wilson threesome enabler Vince Vaughn, and has been "protective" ever since the big bad breakup. So bringing Mayer to Cox's Malibu home for the weekend was, well, kind of like one of those tens of thousands of episodes of Friends when either Rachel or Monica would bring some new young guy back to their inexplicably large loft and give each other the thumbs up or down. So which way did Cox's recently skeletal thumb point after spending the weekend with the serial dater?

As a source told the National Enquirer, "Ahead of Aniston's introduction...a friend [said] 'John's a bit uneasy about it - it's like meeting your lover's mom for the first time. Jen laughs and tells him Courteney just wants to pinch and poke the product." And what can we do but judge for ourselves by these pictures? Sure, paps are annoying, but stars with Malibu balconies have no right to look this pissed just seeing one, as Cox does above. We suspect she's actually just spotting John twisting those bullet-shaped tits of Jen's (sorry, we simply will never, ever get over their perfection) like radio dials and attempting to serenade her with his go-to seduction move: "Chocolate Rain." Yeah, if we saw that from our deck, we'd cringe just like Courteney. If not call the LAPD's official Areola Squad, stat.

[Photo credits: X17]

• JENNIFER ANISTON TAKES HER NEW MAN TO MEET HER 'FRIENDS' [Daily Mail]

[Photos: Bauer-Griffin]

• Vince Vaughn Goes to the Dogs [Bauer-Griffin via Celebslam]

In today's episode: Al Pacino; Matthew Perry; Val Kilmer; John Krasinski; Vince Vaughn; Spencer Pratt; Heidi Montag; Chris Evans; Simon Rex; Kathie Lee Gifford; Stephen Cojocaru; Dee Snider; Danni Minogue; Mel C.; Randall Kleiser

Wednesday (4/2) Polo Lounge lunch: Al Pacino, in a group of older, possibly producer/artiste-types getting shitfaced.

3/31: At the Fox and Hounds pub in Studio City when who should walk in to sit at a nearby table but Mr. Chandler Bing himself, Matthew Perry. He proceeded to sit at a table surrounded by 4 or 5 girls dressed more for a night of clubbing than for trivia, but I guess someone knew their stuff because their team came in second overall. Matt got up for the joke round and proceeded to tell a tale involving elephant penises (was too drunk to remember the actual joke).

Val Kilmer was on my Virgin America flight from JFK to LAX yesterday (4/1) with his two kids. He's looking hot again, with some highlights and less weight than those unflattering photos of him from last summer. He kept walking up and down the aisles, presumably so people would notice him.

Last night (4/2) at LAX John Krasinski cut in line like he's some entitled uber-celebrity and not just 'that jim guy from the office who couldn't pick a decent movie script if his life depended on it'. Old people were in that line, including my nanna and poppa, and that's never okay. He had a tall chick in tow.

I just got home from watching 21 at the Arclight in Hollywood (04/03 at 10:30pm). Vince Vaughn was walking out in front of us. He looked happy, smiling, and well fed. He was with another guy who could have been a foot shorter than Vince and looked like George Costanza.

4/4: I was just stuck in traffic driving down sunset and a dirty black bmw pulls up next to me. a guy with dirty blonde hair is driving so i look over to see if he's cute or not and OH MY GOD it's spencer pratt. dear lord, why?!? he leans forward and heidi is sitting there in the car with him.

4/2: Chris Evans and Simon Rex at Stone Rose - Evans is hot in a fratty way, but still shorter than you'd expect (I remain shocked by the height challenges of Hollywood stars), kept randomly dancing about and running into people. Rex doesn't look nearly as wrecked as you would expect from someone who has gotten down with P. Hilton, but he genuinely dances like he's mentally incapacitated.

Tuesday (4/1) Polo Lounge sighting (admittedly extremely ho-hum) was Kathie Lee Gifford, loudly "look-at-me, I'm actually working again after ten years of humiliation and shame, eat me Katie Couric" singing songs from some album she announced was some kind of teen thing (yeah, the kids just love KTG!).

Cojo at the Beverly Center Macy's on April 2nd in the early afternoon. He was filming some sort of spring fashion segment about the color yellow, in a very loud grating voice.

4/2 PM: Dee Snider eating dinner at SimonLA looking exactly like he looks in every picture you've ever seen of him, chatting with Kerry Simon himself.

4/1: I was roped into going to the Dancing with the Starstaping yesterday at the CBS studios. Sat a few down from Danni Minogue who was there to see her sister sing. Kylie kept looking at her sister throughout the performance. After both songs she would make faces at her poking fun at her own outfit and dance moves. Actually seems like they have good senses of humor about themselves and are close. Other sightings included Mel C.

Runyon Canyon last Saturday afternoon (3/29) with a bunch of friends. We were on the way down and spotted a passel of older gay gentlemen, one of whom was shirtless and quite leathery. Upon closer inspection, the shirtless man turned out to be Randall Kleiser (director of Grease and The Blue Lagoon). The dude must be 60 but he's still fit... just leathery as well.

I've confirmed that Vince Vaughn has axed both his manager Eric Gold and his agency United Talent. Someone close to Vince just told me he did it by cell phone.

He's still with his attorney Debbie Klein. He'd been a UTA client since 1993 (three years before his breakout Swingers, which was partly filmed in the apartment of an agency assistant) and a Gold client since 2005's Wedding Crashers. [...]

Vaughn is telling people today that he made the moves because his manager and his agency "didn't get along at all" and it was too much drama in his life.

While the justification of infighting amongst his people is a nice deflection, we're certain that both sides would have readily smoothed over any perceived differences had they known their $20 mil-per-picture client's patronage was on the line. No, we suspect Vaughn's frustrations were over creative strategy, and The Wedding Crashers star opted to burn it all down and start from scratch, rather than subject himself to even one more pitch in which he'd be called upon to play "Leonard Toothfairy, the loutish brother-in-law of the legendary dental pixie."

• Vince Vaughn Fires Agency And Manager [Deadline Hollywood Daily]