It may or may not still be moving forward, but I have it from the most reliable source possible — Perelman himself — that it will not be going forward with him at the helm. ... Perelman was attached, and I can say with as much certainty as one can possibly have about a situation like this that the decision to step down was on Perelman's side.

Some fans of Ayn Rand's book are already bemoaning the Atlas Curse, fearing their beloved 12-pound brick of American letters will never receive the marathon film version it deserves. We're a little more optimistic, however, envisioning its star's symbolic embrace of the directing, screenwriting and acting reins in tribute to the source novelist's self-made spirit. Between Brad Pitt as John Galt and crewing up with first assistant director Maddox and the rest of the brood, this idea may really be about as right-place-right-time as it gets.

• BREAKING: Vadim Perelman Shrugs off 'Atlas' [Cinematical via Hollywood Elsewhere]

Garcia says she met him that night at The Other Room bar in Venice Beach, where he struck up a conversation and invited her to a "party" at his place a few blocks away. But when Garcia arrived at Perelman's plush pad, the only other guest was his girlfriend, Maia Javan.

The two women had cocktails on the roof terrace while Vadim excused himself. About a half-hour later, Garcia says, Perelman poked his head out the window and asked them to come back downstairs.

"We stayed out for another 10 minutes and then came down to the living room," Garcia recalls. "He came out wearing a bathrobe, and he was in a full-on rage. He was, like, 'I've never been treated so rudely in my own [bleeping] house! You left me alone!' I looked over at Maia, and she kind of just rolled her eyes. But then he picked up a dining-room chair and threw it at my head.

"I grabbed my things . . . I seriously didn't think he would let me leave, but he did . . . I was really upset and started crying. I was totally blindsided. It was just this instant change in his personality."

Even stranger, another woman, who asked to remain anonymous, tells us that Perelman bragged to her on their one and only date that he had "broken" his penis by having sex with so many women on a trip to Brazil. Even creepier, Perelman claimed his wingman on this improbable pleasure trip was none other than Fabio, the beefcake pitchman for "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter."

We imagine that Perelman's lawyer can easily repurpose the explanation he used for last weekend's bar fight to deal with these more minor incidents; expect an official announcement about how the ensuing "confusion" in the aftermath of the botched Venice menage a trois led to the "completely unintentional man-handling" of the dining room chair, and stressing the "unacceptable negligence" of "accidental" wingman Fabio in the "regrettable" Brazilian pubis-fracture.

UPDATE: Perelman's lawyer was kind enough to inform us that 1) the woman making the chair-flinging accusation has made a full retraction of her statements to the Post, and 2) that his defense in the matter is that Perelman is "innocent of the conduct alleged." We really would've gone with the strategy outlined above, but we must disclose that while our ideas for a defense sound great to us, we are not properly accredited $400-per-hour members of the legal profession. Take our advice at your own peril.

• GRIPES ABOUT 'GROPE' DIRECTOR [Page Six]
• Previously: 'House of Sand And Fog' Director Picks Great Weekend For Getting Arrested [Defamer]

Perelman allegedly grabbed two women's buttocks and punched one of them in the face at Rain Ultralounge & Sushi Bar, 112 Washington St., according to police. He was arrested early last Saturday and released on $5,000 bond for a court appearance next week.

Perelman's attorney, Paul Callan of Manhattan, yesterday said he had not seen official court documents about the allegations, but that the case involves "minor, misdemeanor charges" stemming from a barroom scuffle.

Perelman intends to plead not guilty and looks forward to being exonerated, his attorney said.

"Vadim adamantly denies being involved in any kind of a sexual assault," Callan said. "My understanding is . . . there were a large number of people crowded together . . . so it was a confusing situation involving a barroom scuffle, and there was never any intent by Vadim to touch anyone inappropriately."

The story has more details on how the "scuffle" unfolded, but it seems like any bar fight so ugly that a director accidentally punches an underage girl in the face and unintentionally winds up touching a pair of asses really could have benefited from the involvement of an experienced stunt coordinator. We're sure Perelman's next brawl with the Connecticut locals will be a more elegantly choreographed affair, not another amateurish, chaotic blur of flying fists and randomly grabby hands.

• Film director charged after incident in SoNo [GreenwichTime.com]