<![CDATA[Gawker: defamer, two and a half semen]]> http://tags.gawker.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/gawker.com.png <![CDATA[Gawker: defamer, two and a half semen]]> http://gawker.com/tag/defamer/twoandahalfsemen http://gawker.com/tag/defamer/twoandahalfsemen <![CDATA[Charlie Sheen's Fiancée Wants To Show You the Sticks She Pees On]]> charlie_brooke.jpgWhat is with celebrities and their pregnancy tests these days? Halle Berry admitted on Oprah that she has a drawer at home full of 35 used pregnancy tests (jesus, is that even sanitary?). Now comes word that Charlie Sheen's fiancée. Brooke Mueller, is trying to get pregnant and is flaunting the pregnancy sticks around like a middle schooler showing off her first Dooney & Bourke. Reports Page Six:

The gorgeous Palm Beach native visited Sheen on the set of a Hanes commercial he was filming with Michael Jordan outside LA, and took pregnancy tests in his trailer, says one insider. "She would throw them out in the garbage on set and place them right on top . . . everyone could see the sticks," said our spy, who added Mueller would walk around showing off her "enormous" yellow diamond ring to the crew.
No word on whether the pregnancy tests boasted a minus sign or the plus sign of doom, but one can only hope the former. At this point, Sheen's blood stream looks a lot like the East River — full of flotsam, discarded bottles of Jack, the occasional hypodermic needle, a dead hooker or two. Really it's lucky that the first kids were born with only one head and didn't have hands for feet. Let's not tempt fate here. We also can't imagine what Hanes was thinking signing up Charlie Sheen, but we're looking forward to their new spring ad campaign: "Look whose toxic, prostitute-penetrating bulge we have our Hanes on now!"]]> http://gawker.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=378731&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Charlie Sheen Claims Denise Richards Asked Him For One More Bouncing, Baby Bargaining Chip]]> sheen-richards.jpgIf you were under the impression that Charlie Sheen's recent betrothal meant that his ugly and very public divorce from Denise Richards was finalized, you'd be mistaken, as there are still a great many unresolved matters of asset division and child custody between the warring couple. There are also unlikely glimmers of reconciliation, however, as Sheen now claims he has documented proof that Richards wanted to conceive a third child with the actor even after she discovered the ugly, trampolining-cheerleader truth. From People.com:

"There was a request for a donation," Sheen, who is now engaged to Brooke Mueller, tells TV's Entertainment Tonight, as reported on the Web site for its sister show, The Insider.
"Without getting into it here," the The Two and a Half Men Emmy nominee, 41, tells ET's Mark Steines, "there is a specific document relating to this that I am going to reserve for a court."

Asked if he would take this alleged offer from Richards seriously, Sheen replies: "I would sooner, in exactly what I'm wearing, walk on the surface of the moon. Does that answer it?"

Because the couple has never met a tabloid TV anchor or gossip columnist they felt couldn't help them work through their disastrous personal issues, Richards was quick to rebut the outrageous claim in yesterday's Page Six, and Sheen has already countered her denial by stating that he has possession of "something she wrote would completely and totally defy that." Still, the entire matter might simply be the result of Sheen reading a little too much into one clause in Richards' settlement proposal, mistakenly assuming she specifically sought a sperm donation in the paragraph detailing her demands for literally half of everything Sheen owns, "including, but not limited to, the party's organs, bodily expulsions, abstract thoughts, and Jet-Ski collection."

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