Gawker: defamer, theme parks

Brendan Fraser, Habitual Line Cutter

Douglas Reinhardt — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 14:40:00 EDT

The Mummy: Tomb Of the Dragon Emperor star Brendan Fraser used the oldest excuse in the book ("I'm the star of the films that this ride is based on!") to get ahead in line for the "Revenge Of The Mummy" ride at Universal Studios Hollywood. Fraser flexed a few muscles and signed some autographs for the park's guests until his pen ran out of ink. Fraser then explained that the ride needed his final approval before being officially opened to the public, then cut in front of a whole pack of 9-year-old boys who had slept in line for the ride overnight.

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Hollywood To Stabilize Middle East Through Theme Park Diplomacy

Mark — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 14:20:21 EDT

· Hollywood invades the Middle East! MGM partners with a Jordanian animation company on a 26-episode Pink Panther & Pals cartoon series, while Paramount plans to erect a theme park in Dubai that exploits properties like Top Gun, Titanic, Mission: Impossible, and many, many others. Visitors to the UAE park will be moved by an animatronic Effie's emotional delivery of "I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" on Dreamgirls: The Ride. [Variety, Variety]
· Get excited: Legendary Pictures will pump $1 billion into its co-financing and co-production deal with Warner Bros. Who can't get psyched when multimedia conglomerates and financing entities hook up to minimize the financial risks of producing another overbudget Superman sequel? [THR]
· In the most hotly anticipated hosting announcement of the largely unwatched summer TV season, Joey Fatone will oversee the smooth operation of NBC's karaoke clusterfuck The Singing Bee. [Variety]
· Speaking of the summer TV wasteland, Fox wins the 18-49 demo with Top Chef: Shouty, Brain-Damaged Edition, while NBC fails to win behind a two-hour, all-Mark-Consuelos-hosted block of our new favorite shows, Kittens Vs. Cougars and the premiering Science Vs. Penis. [THR]
· Even with American Idol drawing tens of millions of teenagers away from their MySpaces twice a week, Fox's median viewer age passed 40 for the first time last season. Expect some emergency counterprogramming in the form of the Wilmer Valderrama-hosted So You Think You Can Watch Our Channel, You Old Fuck? [Variety]

Parents Brace For Two More Years Of Whining Before They Can Finally Take Their Brats To Harry Potter Land

Seth — Thu, 31 May 2007 16:12:23 EDT

The news millions of children (and socially awkward adults who enjoy playing wizarding make-believe in their leisure time) have been waiting for has finally come: Plans for a Harry Potter theme park have been announced, in which the series's enchanted cobblestone walkways and ivy-covered walls will be painstainkingly recreated on the grounds of the equally magical Universal's Islands of Adventure. Reports the AP:

"The Wizarding World of Harry Potter" is set to open at Universal's Islands of Adventure theme park in late 2009, complete with the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the Forbidden Forest and Hogsmeade village.

"The plans I've seen look incredibly exciting, and I don't think fans of the books or films will be disappointed," said author J.K. Rowling, who has been working with a creative team to make sure the park resembles the books and films.
[Universal's Scott] Trowbridge said while there would not be any character lookalikes at the park, fans wanting to see Harry Potter and his magical friends wouldn't leave disappointed.

"This is Harry's world," said Trowbridge. "Most every fan wants to have an encounter with the star of the show."

Since the project gets the nod of approval from notoriously protective series creator J.K. Rowling, you can be sure The Wizarding World of Harry Potter will capture the scope and detail of the novels. Souvenir stands will likely grace every other corner, selling the requisite Fanged Frisbees and Screaming Yo-Yos to the dazzled Harry fans. And at the end of their long day of spell-casting adventure, sick from gorging on Bertie Bott's Vomit-Flavored Churros, they'll trod back to their cars, wishing their official Nimbus 2000 reproduction could hasten the journey, and incapable of a withholding just a slight sneer of derision as they pass the Muggle simpletons cavorting at the park's comparatively puerile Seuss Landing.

Harry Potter theme park headed to Fla. [Yahoo/AP]