Ain't It Cool News broke the stunning casting revelation this afternoon, noting few details besides Schwarzenegger's commitment to a one-day shoot and that "it seems that the Gov and Sly's character Barney Ross have some history back when the Gov was shooting Conan the Barbarian!" (Harry Knowles's exclamation point, not ours.) Add this to our already-robust interest in seeing the film, along with the governor's inevitable Charlie Rose appearance thanking Stallone for inviting him back in front of the camera at a time when only his dogs trusted him.

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  AICN Exclusive: Arnold Schwarzeneggar [sic] joins the cast of 'THE EXPENDABLES'!
  [AICN]

Tattoos aside, 62-year-old Stallone's human growth hormone-aided physique hasn't changed that much from that which took a merciless heavyweight pummeling three years ago in Rocky Balboa or punched enemy heads from their pencil necks last year in Rambo. But while we long ago gave up any hope of a less chemically cut Stallone setting an example for younger moviegoers, we're most worried now about the imminent influence on his more organically athletic Expendables co-star Jason Statham. Or, more dangerous yet, the Adonis that is Forest Whitaker; he's worked on that body way too hard for way too long to throw it all away on an old man's whim.

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  Stallone... 62... Cut From Granite, Inked & Ready For 'THE EXPENDABLES'!
  [AICN]

Actually, don't answer that. Even with born-again genre slut Sir Ben Kingsley rumored to have an eye on the project, it's not necessarily unfair to calculate the sum of these parts as "clusterfuck": Guided by Stallone both in front of and behind the camera, a gang of mercenaries heads off to South America to take down a ruthless dictator. But perhaps its the optimism of a new year or, more rationally, the concept of a Gran Torino-esque valedictory with half the syllables and twice the bullets that has us intrigued at the possibilities here. To wit:

· Score One: The Second Coming of Mickey Rourke owes itself in part to Stallone's faith in him a decade ago, when he recommended Rourke for a minor role in the remake of Get Carter. Their brooding, mangle-faced chemistry was about the only thing that clicked while the film imploded around them. We wanted more, and we'll get it.

· Score Two: One of our New Year's resolutions is to explain why Statham may be the greatest actor working today — with the exception of War, his misbegotten action showcase with Li, who requires some atonement of his own. The Expendables offers a nurturing environment for that to occur. Or it will affirm a Statham/Li curse, which will at least save Flopz™-grade genre-flick mills the trouble of bothering again in the future. Win-win.

· Score Three: A Stallone/Lundgren reunion bespeaks more than inspired stunt-casting, but also the prospect for unprecedented levels of bonding between fathers nostalgic for Rocky IV and sons who'll attend anything with them as long as they can drive the car.

· Score Four: Unless you count Denzel Washington (we don't) and his Where the Wild Things Are voice work for Spike Jonze, Forest Whitaker hasn't worked with a real director since Kevin Macdonald shepherded him to an Oscar in 2006. He may not fully reclaim his edge, but if he can just anchor a group like this, we'll take it.

· Score Five: It's not Rambo V.

• Mickey Rourke joins 'Expendables' [Variety]