We review all this as introduction to quite possibly the most exciting online development to roll across our virtual desktops in quite some time. Aaron Sorkin, or someone who has gone to a great deal of effort to convince others he is Aaron Sorkin, has emerged from his self-imposed, blogophobic exile to openly embrace the social networking phenomenon known as Facebook. From his introductory letter entitled, Aaron Sorkin & The Facebook Movie:

Welcome. I'm Aaron Sorkin. I understand there are a few other people using Facebook pages under my name—which I find more flattering than creepy—but this is me. I don't know how I can prove that but feel free to test me.

I've just agreed to write a movie for Sony and producer Scott Rudin about Mark Zuckerberg, Eduardo Saverin and Dustin Moskovitz—three sophmores at Harvard who, in order to meet girls, invented Facebook. I figured a good first step in my preparation would be finding out what Facebook is, so I've started this page. (Actually it was started by my researcher, Ian Reichbach, because my grandmother has more Internet savvy than I do and she's been dead for 33 years.)

The thoughtful contributions to The Wall alone are enough to wipe away the traumatic memories of that angry, faceless Defaker mob. Facebook Sorkin dutifully responds to every comment, along the way reuniting with old acquaintances ("Michael—You did a lot more than fetch pizza and of course I remember you,") and lending fascinating insights into his ambivalence about the very medium he'll elevate with crackling trademark dialogue into a vehicle that could go on to win Justin Long and Joseph Gordon-Levitt their first Oscars. He writes: "[A]s far as the Internet making us meaner, it does remove a natural censor that we have that commands us to treat people with common respect. An exception apparently are the people posting on this board, whose intelligence, humility and wit are extremely frustrating in that they're disproving my point and that drives me nuts." We really hope this is Sorky. If it's just an impostor, then the Internet has gone and proven his point all over again—not to mention the fact that A Few Good Pokes won't be in theaters anywhere come Christmas 2010.

• Aaron Sorkin & The Facebook Movie [Facebook]

"I don't know how to emphasize this enough that I'm not disappointed or upset with anyone but myself," Sorkin says over lunch at Nate 'n Al's last week where he is repeatedly interrupted by fans wanting to share how much they enjoyed his work.

"There are only two possible reasons for 'Studio 60' failing — it was either my fault or it was just one of those things. On some shows, you can make mistakes and still survive. But with this one, I made too many mistakes for it to survive." [...]

Every failure in Hollywood gets blamed on something else, from movies that bomb (freak snowstorms back East) to anemic album sales (illegal file sharing by snotty college kids). But Sorkin sees a more insidious villain — a triviality-obsessed media no longer willing to separate gossip and idle speculation from reporting and criticism. "When all everyone does is try to draw personal connections between your characters and real people, you're not really watching a play or a TV show anymore," he says. "It becomes a tabloid experience."

This gossipy guesswork pervaded much of the media coverage of "Studio 60," in which much was made of the supposed similarities between "Studio 60" characters and real-life counterparts. It wasn't an entirely unreasonable assumption, since one of the show's lead characters — a TV writer with a history of drug problems — was written by Sorkin, a TV writer with a history of drug problems.

What clearly bugs Sorkin is that for whatever matrix of reasons — his messy private life, his brash willingness to publicly trash Internet bloggers or just his star power as a writer — he became a target for all sorts of gossipy buzz that doesn't haunt similarly successful writers like "Everybody Loves Raymond's" Phil Rosenthal or "Curb Your Enthusiasm's" Larry David.

"I can flat-out guarantee that Phil was writing autobiographical stories in his show, but for some reason people just aren't caught up in the gossip of his life," Sorkin says. "It's just unhealthy. 'After the Fall' is a better play if you don't know that Arthur Miller and Marilyn Monroe were married. It doesn't enhance the experience of seeing the play if you're being a detective, always looking for clues. You only see the writing through a filter that takes you out of the actual story."

Indeed, our own experience of the show was colored by exactly these kinds of unhealthy pursuits, where we became obsessed with sleuthing out alleged parallels between Jordan McDeere and TV exec Jamie Tarses, The Christian One Whose Name We Can Never Remember to Sorkin ex Kristen Chenowith, and Lobster Boy and the psilocybin-induced demonic hallucination who first pitched the idea of Studio 60 to Sorkin during a particularly vivid "development session." Now that our prejudices have been exposed, we promise to approach the celebrated writer's next project with a mind uncluttered by such peripheral obsessions.

• THE BIG PICTURE: Sorkin takes the blame for 'Studio 60' [LAT]
• Previously: The Complete Guide To The Series Finale Of 'Studio 60' [Defamer]

· Matt, for the moment free of his lingering addiction to feel-good pills, reunited romantically with the religious one whose name always escapes us. Marion, we think. Esther? Eh, whatever, at least we remember her character type.

· Jordan survived the complications from her pregnancy, drew up adoption papers allowing new fiance Danny to legally become the father of her newborn daughter, and for one blissful moment, finally stopped worrying about the ratings.

· Jack from Wings and D.L. Hughley found Matt's well-hidden bottle of emergency Scotch, then spent a tense night getting wasted and reliving the corporate censorship issues of NBS's wrongheaded, spineless past. No high fives or one-armed hugs were exchanged, though it was apparent both men would have liked that.

· Just as Tom Jeter was giving the OK to send millions of dollars to mercenaries to save his brother from his terrorist captors in Afghanistan, God sent a Blackhawk helicopter to rescue the hostages from certain death and Tom from choosing the selfish side of a morally compromising dilemma. And once Tom concluded a tearful cellphone chat with his liberated sibling, the Gruff Military Guy with the Heart of Gold informed the entire Studio 60 gang that the President had ordered an immediate and total withdrawal of all troops from Iraq, an announcement that kicked off the most jubilent wrap party in the show's long history.

· The ferret ate the snake, the coyote ate the ferret, and, even though there was no explanation of how it came to roam the crawlspace underneath the studio, a mountain lion ate the coyote.

· Lobster Boy and Peripheral Vision Man were married by just-ordained minister Fake Nic Cage in a quiet ceremony in Matt's office.

· Because he was never real to begin with, Tim Batale did not make an appearance; however, it will eventually be revealed in the DVD collection that if one freeze-frames Matt looking out from his office window during the marriage ceremony, his reflection in the glass is briefly swapped with Tim's.

· The blacklisted, Alzheimer's-afflicted writer got both his memory and his career back, penning a sketch savagely satirizing the mistakes of HUAC-era Hollywood.

· Perched in a catwalk high above the soundstage, Sting quietly strummed a lute, but everyone was far too busy enjoying their happy endings to even notice.

[Image: An ad taken about by fans in yesterday's THR]

• 'Dance' performs for Fox; 'Studio 60' aids NBC [THR]

· Add "corpses" to the list of fun things the Sunset Tan people will bronze, right below "grade-school girls with crazy moms." (And in an amusing side note, our tipster found this clip while searching YouTube for clips of "hot blondes" doing stuff.)
· Mayor Villaraigosa is separating from his wife. Our knee-jerk reaction to this news is the blame this photo of him posing with Paris Hilton.
·A South Park promo puts an unnamed network's "balls policy" to the test.
·Brad Whitford has made peace with Studio 60's demise. We just hope that Tom Jeter's brother gets out of Iraq alive.

A reporter asks Reilly (paraphrased): "Since you're committed to renewing good shows even if they have low ratings, does that mean 'Studio 60' wasn't a good show?"

Nearly everybody — including NBC Universal President-CEO Jeff Zucker — finds this question funny. Reilly replies that "Studio 60" received "a mixed response," even within NBC. Showrunner Aaron Sorkin "was doing the show he wanted to do. ... It just kind of felt like that show had kind of run its course. ... I have no regrets."

To further demonstrate that the network is dedicated to the rising stars of its future and not to dwelling on the low-rated misfires of the past, with a sharp clap of his hands Reilly summoned his Bionic Woman (9 p.m. Wednesday nights) to the stage, who then delighted all ad sales personnel in attendance by ceremonially suffocating Studio 60 breakout character Lobster Boy with a pillow emblazoned with NBC's proud peacock logo, a display that drove Sorkin—who'd shown up on the crazy hope he'd get a surprise second season order—from the venue in tears.

• Reilly Deconstructs Schedule [TV Week Blog]
• Previously: NBC Hoping Your Appetite For Its High-Quality Hits Is Insatiable [Defamer]

"We've got the class and next season we're ready to add some mass, with new shows that build on the creative accomplishments of last season and are as broad as they are good. Combine the energy of these new programs with the bulked-up strength of our existing NBC hits and you've got a lineup that's poised to take us to the next level."

Unfortunately, Reilly's "Class + Mass=Keep My Job For Another Season" formula (an earlier incarnation, "You like our high-quality hits? Then choke on them, bitches," was rewritten so as not to offend conservative advertisers) left no room for a fresh sitcom on the Fall schedule; their first new comedy offering, The IT Crowd (think The Office, but with computer nerds) won't arrive until midseason. And, in news that will certainly plunge its legion of dedicated, affluent, and upscale fans into self-mutilating depths of despair, it appears that not even the maverick, class-craving Reilly could find a place in primetime for Studio 60, officially ending Aaron Sorkin's failed tenure as the network's Nielsen Messiah.

The full NBC schedule (via THR) follows:

MONDAY
8-9 p.m.: "Deal or No Deal"
9-10 p.m.: "Heroes"
10-11 p.m.: "JOURNEYMAN"

TUESDAY
8-9 p.m.: "The Biggest Loser"
9-10 p.m.: "CHUCK"
10-11 p.m.: "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"

WEDNESDAY
8-9 p.m.: "Deal or No Deal"
9-10 p.m.: "BIONIC WOMAN"
10-11 p.m.: "LIFE"

THURSDAY
8-8:30 p.m.: "My Name Is Earl"
8:30-9 p.m.: "30 Rock"
9-9:30 p.m.: "The Office"
9:30-10 p.m.: "Scrubs"
10-11 p.m.: "ER"

FRIDAY
8-9 p.m.: "1 vs 100"/"THE SINGING BEE"
9-10 p.m.: "Las Vegas"
10-11 p.m.: "Friday Night Lights"

SATURDAY
8-9 p.m.: "Dateline NBC"
9-11 p.m.: Drama Series Encores

SUNDAY (Fall 2007)
7-8 p.m.: "Football Night in America"
8-11 p.m.: "NBC Sunday Night Football"

• NBC announces schedule, shows [Variety]
• No new comedies on the peacock's fall schedule [THR]

• 'Studio 60' Returning in May [Zap2it.com]
• Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip [NBC.com]
• Previously: 'Studio 60' CancellationWatch: Sorkin And Company Quietly Playing Out The String [Defamer]

• Conan - Studio 6A [YouTube via BWE/TV Tattle]

"From the beginning, '30 Rock' has proven to be the kind of quality comedy that doesn't come around very often, and we are very pleased to have this show back for a second season," NBC Entertaimment prexy Kevin Reilly said. "We expect it to continue to build its increasingly loyal audience and become another of NBC's classic comedy series."

When asked the inevitable question about Studio 60, a visibly uncomfortable Reilly momentarily fidgeted with his tie before offering, "You know what? They really had some moments, like the time Matthew Perry hallucinated that staff writer with the anagram name, or when they sent the coyote to eat the ferret—a ferret, not a mink, right?—they sent to eat the snake that got loose under the stage. We expect the show to become another cherished part of our home entertainment division's DVD catalog of quality dramas that never really found that loyal audience we spent untold millions of dollars trying to build."

• NBC renews '30 Rock' [Variety]
• Previously: Tina Fey Says Thing About Aaron Sorkin That We Are More Than Happy To Blow Out Of Proportion [Defamer]

A rumor had been going around (imagine that — a rumor on the Internet!) that after having gone back into production earlier this month on episodes 17 through 22, the show had ceased production and the plug finally, irrevocably pulled. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! (Imagine it — an inaccurate rumor on the Internet!) I got the scoop this very afternoon from Lesley Cerwin, the NBC publicist assigned to the show, and she confirmed that production on episode 19 was scheduled to be completed today and work on episode 20 commenced on Thursday.

So yes, it appears that at least the full season complement of shows will make it into the can for Aaron Sorkin's noble but low-rated hour. But all of you "Save Studio 60" cyber sites and blogs, take note: it is now highly unlikely the show will be brought back this spring. The more probable scenario (strictly my conjecture): it will come back in originals over the summer as something of a "bell lap" final farewell.

Don't hold your breath for the show's second-season renewal. That probably ain't happening. Networks typically reserve that stuff for shows that don't bleed millions of dollars, being as they are in the profit business and all.

While even the most blissfully delusional Aaronite dared not dream of a second season, dramatically announced at the upcoming network upfronts by the embattled showrunner and NBC president Kevin Reilly as they cackle over an enormous pile of money they'd just ceremonially set on fire to demonstrate their commitment to art over responsible business, the news that fresh episodes might find their way onto the summer schedule is welcome: Sorkin's important message about how the once-proud medium of television is now merely a receptacle into which visionless programming execs regularly move their bowels will never be more poignant than when his show is sandwiched between The Real Wedding Crashers and the highly anticipated Victoria Beckham Shops for Shoes—neither of which, tragically, will ever have the opportunity to cement its place in popular culture by being ineptly satirized in a half-seen sketch on Studio.

• Every Time I Use 'Canceled' and 'Studio 60' in a Headline, My Hits on Google Head Off the Charts! [Past Deadline]
• Previously: 'Studio 60' CancellationWatch Renewed: Early Yanking Can't Be A Good Sign [Defamer]

· Imagine's Brian Grazer will superproduce an utterly unneeded "American version" of the film Cache for Universal, from which partner Ron Howard will drain all nuance by "amp[ing] up the suspense and consequences" should he choose to direct it. [Variety]
· Satellite Radio Mergermania! Sirius and XM announce their intentions to combine into a single corporate entity—if the FCC approves a move that would result in the unholy pairing of Oprah Winfrey and Howard Stern on a single provider. [THR]
· In a move that should surprise only those reading the trades for the first time today after waking up from a three-year coma, Lionsgate and Twisted Pictures are going ahead with a fourth Saw movie, timed for a Halloween weekend release later this year. [Variety]
· Last night's episode of Heroes remained "scorching hot" in the 18-49 demographic; somewhat less engulfed in Nielsen's flame is Studio 60, which had its second consecutive week of record-low ratings. (We TiVo'd S60, so we're unable to make a reference to how Matt's battle with his pill-popping, hallucinated alter ego turned out. We regret being part of Sorkin's time-shifting problem.) [THR]
· Ghost Rider's total take over the three-day weekend is $51.5 million; that's the all-time Presidents Day weekend record, if you're into relatively meaningless box office statistics. [Variety]

Decision to yank "Studio 60" a week early will no doubt raise a new round of questions about the show's long-term fate. Insiders said the net still hasn't decided what to do with the show and that the sked change is mostly about giving "Donnellys" the best possible launch.

We take absolutely no joy in this development, as we've found showrunner Aaaron Sorkin's recent, if tragically low-rated, turn towards Shayamalanesque storytelling techniques (we spent a good portion of the second act of Monday night's show scrawling the letters in "Tim Batale" on a window with a grease pencil until a lucky combination of the letters finally unlocked the shocking secret of Matt Albie's hallucinated, pill-popping alter-ego) a refreshing shift from the kind of coyote-chasing-ferret-chasing-snake frivolity that has hampered recent episodes of the drama. Besides, the last time S60 seemed to be on shaky footing, it was rewarded with a full-season pick-up, so we're inclined to believe that its sure-to-be-brief hiatus from the airwaves has something to do with ongoing negotiations between Sorkin and NBC president Kevin Reilly to work out a deal not only to keep the series on the air for three additional seasons, but to quickly spin off some popular recurring characters, like Militant Fruit Of The Loom Guy and Alcoholic Musical Prodigy Daughter Of A Stern Asian Businessman Who Pretends Not To Speak English To Advance An Already Convoluted Plot, into their own pilots.

• Earlier tack for 'Black' [Variety]
• Previously: Tina Fey Says Thing About Aaron Sorkin That We Are More Than Happy To Blow Out Of Proportion [Defamer]

Tina Fey dissed archfoe Aaron Sorkin Sunday night at the Writers Guild Awards. The "30 Rock" star competes with Sorkin's "Studio 60": Both take place behind the scenes at a show like "Saturday Night Live," where Fey was head writer. Wiggling around the Hudson Theatre stage in a party frock with plunging decolletage, Fey told the crowd, "I hear Aaron Sorkin is in Los Angeles wearing the same dress - but longer, and not funny."

Once one gets the initial Oh, snap!-style sting of the remark, her joke seems patently unfair, as Sorkin's show is intentionally unfunny; in constructing a drama, the celebrated writer's mission is to take on weightier issues affecting sketch comedy shows, like the unexpected budget overruns that can cripple a production when a procession of antagonistic natural predators are lost beneath a busy sound stage. Still, the gibe undoubtedly wounds, as Sorkin had famously deflected the brickbats of amateurish, unemployed critics by citing the silence of accomplished professionals like Fey, who presumably were enjoying his dramatic deconstruction of the genre. Now that Fey has unexpectedly betrayed him, he'll have to hope that remaining, assumed "real comedy writer" supporters Stephen Colbert and SNL's Seth Myers will pass on any opportunities to take gratuitous pokes at him in front of an audience of the reliably employed peers whose opinions he cherishes.

• Side dish (sixth item) [Rush & Molloy]
• Previously: 'LAT' Gives Equal Time To Pro-Sorkin Voices [Defamer]

Dan Hindmarch is a 32-year-old TV writer who has written for "The Unit." On Dec. 5 Hindmarch posted a blog on his MySpace page titled "In Defense of Studio 60." In an e-mail interview Hindmarch said he routinely has to defend the show from his friends who work in television comedy. "Similarly 'House' and 'Grey's Anatomy' must be defended from people who work in medicine," he wrote. "It should be understood: 'Studio 60' does not represent television reality any more than 'The West Wing' represented political (reality)." [...]

In the blog Hindmarch applauds Sorkin for deeming the TV writing profession worthy of television depiction, and for taking risks with subject matter. "If 'Studio 60' goes down, it means that everybody on TV's gotta be doctors or lawyers or cops or related, and that's a slight to the medium of television," he wrote. "... It means that writing should be procedural, that experimentation is verboten, and that failure will be predetermined by focus groups." These things, he wrote, "cannot stand."

We certainly hope that Sorkin finds the professional resumés of his newly discovered defenders adequate, allowing all parties involved to move on from this regrettable episode, and freeing the celebrated, peer-beloved writer from taking yet another swipe at the Times by encouraging Sorkin-endorsed "real comedy writers" Stephen Colbert, Tina Fey, and Seth Meyers to take out a full page ad in Variety offering their presumably glowing endorsements of his show.

• Some people do like Aaron Sorkin's 'Studio 60!' [LAT]
• Previously: Aaron Sorkin Takes On The L.A. Times, Internets, Unemployed Writers [Defamer]