Gawker: defamer, steve carrell

Soon There'll Be Something, Finally, to Watch on TV

Brian Moylan — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 18:23:35 EDT

If you don't have a DVR (for shame!), you're going to need to know when to sit down to catch your favorite series, like Mad Men, Project Runway, Gossip Girl, and 30 Rock. Then go buy a TiVo. Really.

Mad Men
Returns August 16 [AMC]
Yes, that means you only have six days to watch the DVDs of the first two seasons of the show that you've been telling everyone you already watch, even though you don't. You better get hip with Don Draper or else everyone is going to laugh at you.

Top Chef
Returns August 19 [Bravo]
Well, if Bravo can't have a whole show with hot skinny models in crazy dresses, at least they can have Padma Lakshmi when she returns with her cavalcade of chefs who will call each other names and cook up a bunch of shit that would taste better than the mac 'n' cheese from a box you eat while watching.

Project Runway
Returns August 20 [Lifetime]
With the switch in networks, this show is now officially for women (and gay men). The premiere kicks off with an all-star edition and then there is a show about the models directly afterward. After that, probably Golden Girls reruns or some shit.

Melrose Place
Starts September 8 [CW]
Just in time to make us feel old, the '90s are back—and so are Jo, Michael, Jane, and Syndey! Ashlee Simpson is sure to blow this place up. Literally! She'll probably be planting a bomb in the first episode. Oh Melrose, we missed you.

America's Next Top Model
Returns September 9 [CW]
Though Tyra insists on calling it a "cycle" she's back with a whole new batch of bitches. Even if you ignore the rest of the season, tune in for the premiere, just to see what sort of drag queen madness Tyraparades around in. It always looks like the world's biggest budget public access show.

Glee
Starts September 9 [Fox]
You saw the pilot way back in May and there are already new musical numbers. It's like this high-school-musical-theater-nerd dramedy has been here all along. This is either the next Cop Rock or the next My So-Called Life, so catch the early episodes.

Vampire Diaries
Starts September 10 [CW]
Ok, you have have to watch this because vampires are so hot right now and if you don't, 14 year-old girls will mock you. This is the CW show about teenagers who stay up all night because they're undead, not because they're coked up at Butter.

Gossip Girl
Returns September 14 [CW]
You'd think that now that everyone made it to college they'd change. But watch the new promo. Blair gets bitchy, Chuck gets laid, Serena gets naked, Dan gets clueless, Vanessa gets ignored. Some things never change.

The Office
Returns September 17 [NBC]
What's up with Jim and Pam? We gave up. We'd much rather just watch Steve Carell make an ass of himself.

30 Rock
Returns October 15 [NBC]
NBC is so mean! Why is they going to make us wait until October for new episodes? We would boycott if we could survive without Tina Fey and her tiny little glasses. You will not laugh at anything on television until then. Sorry.

Lost
Early 2010 [ABC]
What, they can't set a date? Does everything with this show have to be a fucking mystery?

Chivalrous Steve Carell Saves Anne Hathaway From Ex's Voracious Italian Countrymen

STV — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 20:00:00 EDT

Anne Hathaway's long road back from her oily-boyfriend, dog-abandoning private hell had one final hurdle Monday: The Italian premiere of Get Smart, where Raffaello Follieiri's compatriots bared their red-carpet fangs at the actress — who apparently, despite her ever-expansive doe eyes, didn't see it coming. Thank God, though, Steve Carell was there, defying his typecast incompetence in his helpless co-star's service:

Personal questions were strictly forbidden at the Italian premiere of Get Smart on Monday - but that didn't stop one reporter from asking the movie's star, Anne Hathaway, "Was the separation from your ex-boyfriend painful?" ...
After the reporter lobbed the question, Hathaway remained silent and attempted a faint smile.

But, as if on cue, her costar Steve Carell valiantly stepped in to declare: "In my role of agent [for] Miss Hathaway, I would like to say that she does not answer questions relating to this subject."

We hear Hathaway's Italian inquisitor bristled, then laughed in response: "Oh, you are agent now? Ees funny!" At which time Carell reissued his edict a little more strenuously, coaxing a full chorus of press-line chortles and one audible cry as he briskly walked a disconsolate Hathaway into the theater: "George Foreman Grill! Your foot ees better now, no?" Oh, but for the good old days, when Hathaway walking with a man in Rome meant the high likelihood of a concealed weapon within arm's reach.

Steve Carell's Red-Carpet Rescue of Anne Hathaway [People]

Trade Round-Up: Sundance's Sunshine

Seth — Mon, 23 Jan 2006 14:43:53 EST

· We have our first official big-buzz Sundance hit: Little Miss Sunshine, an ensemble comedy starring Greg Kinnear, Toni Collette and Steve Carell, was snapped up by Fox Searchlight for $10 million after an enthusiastically received premiere and a bidding war that went into the "wee hours." Look for a huge release next year, followed by disappointing box office take when it is completely eclipsed by a Norwegian documentary about sea lion reproduction. [Variety]
· As we mentioned earlier, Brokeback Mountain earns the Producers Guild's top honor. Larry H. Miller reacts by banning any movie with a producer credit from screening at his theaters. [Variety]
· Fox orders a half-hour sitcom based on former NBAer Paul Shirley's blog, "My So-Called NBA Career." The blogification of Hollywood begins, with agents adapting first: Goodbye Armani suits, hello soiled boxers! [Variety]
· Tommy Mottola has optioned the book Queens Reigns Supreme: Fat Cat, 50 Cent and the Rise of the Hip-Hop Hustler, with plans to develop a series. Industry watchers are touting it as the next Designing Women, just with bullet-riddled gangsta rappers sitting around trading saucy quips instead of southern belle interior decorators. [Variety]
· Ron Howard's The Da Vinci Code will open the Cannes Festival in May, to be immediately followed by crowds of French cinema elitists doing their weird-sounding version of booing. [THR]

Trade Round-Up: God Gives Steve Carell A Huge Raise

Mark — Fri, 26 Aug 2005 14:07:55 EDT

· Steve Carell Is The New Poker, Part 2: Carell's Bruce Almighty character will take the lead in the sequel Evan Almighty, in which he embarks on a (hilarious!) quest to build an ark. Additionally, Carell may earn ten times his $500,000 40 Year-Old Virgin payday, making him the first actor to earn five trillion dollars for a single film. [Variety]
· Fox picks up Ivan Reitman's half hour comedy script That Guy, about a 35 year-old who decides to start living like he's 21 again. Or, in other words, like he's living a completely unremarkable life in Hollywood. [THR]
· Sensing an opportunity to get more than 15 people to take interest in one of their shows, UPN launches the biggest promo campaign in its history to make sure that each and every person in America is aware of Everybody Hates Chris. [Variety]
· Hurricane Katrina proves terribly inconvenient for various pre-VMA bacchanalia. Damn, you, Mother Nature, Carson Daly needs to get his schwerve on! [THR]
· The Weinsteins decide that "The Twins of Tribeca" sounds better than "The Psychos of SoHo," decide to stay put in their old neighborhood. [Variety]

Trade Round-Up: Brad Grey Finds Bags Full Of Sherry Lansing's Money

Mark — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 14:42:00 EDT

· The New Paramount's summer has been spent wandering around the box office, finding piles of War of the Worlds and The Longest Yard cash left laying around by the old, Sherry Lansing regime. Third place never felt so easy. [Variety]
· Hollywood's unions are lobbying NY's Governor Pataki, urging him to veto a bill that would allow managers to procure work for their clients while operating outside of the rules that apply to licensed agents (like the one that usually limits them to 10 percent commissions), plunging the world of talent agencies into chaos. [THR]
· Steve Carrell is the new poker: New Line nabs The 40 Year Old Virgin for High T, in which he's injected with testosterone until acceptable levels of hilarity ensue, and ensuring that the actor is well on his way to Stilleresque/Ferrellian levels of overexposure. [Variety]
· People are actually watching Big Brother 6, proving that the late summer schedule is even more of a wasteland than previously suspected. [THR]
· What we meant to say is that AJ Jacobs is the new poker: After very recently selling a book proposal to Paramount, Universal options the Esquire writer's article "My Outsourced Life" for Jay Roach's (newly Universal-based) Everyman Films. Steve Carrell to star. (Just kidding—for now, at least). [Variety]