On the show, it is definitely a space lizard (maybe Balloon Boy's dad's conspiracy theories about lizard people were right all along!), but like a Chicago Tribune review by Glenn Garvin points out, it could also be about our nerd president.

Welcome to ABC's "V," the most fascinating and bound to be the most controversial new show of the fall television season. Nominally a rousing sci-fi space opera about alien invaders bent on the conquest (and digestion) of all humanity, it's also a barbed commentary on Obamamania that will infuriate the president's supporters and delight his detractors.

Anna is the beautiful and charming leader of the aliens—knows as V's because they are visitors—and she tells the world that her people can fix everything that is wrong with society. She has the liberal media brainwashed, and they all go along with stories about how great and wonderful she is. Of course, there is a fringe group who rebel against her and want to expose them as the evil-doing, reptile skinned, foreigners that they really are. Of course, these are the heroes of the show. Wow, that really does sound like the teabaggers! There's even a religious rebel named Father Jack, which is basically an anagram of George W. Bush.

It certainly wouldn't be new for a sci-fi series to be an allegory about modern society (Battlestar Galactica, anyone?) but it would be sort of odd for a sci-fi show on a major network to give credence to tactics and delusions of the far right. The birthers will be lapping up a show about a foreign-born president who comes to snatch society out of their clutches, and Glenn Back and his cronies will love to see a media that is overtaken by liberals and keeps the truth away from the "real Americans." But what will everyone else think?

The sci-fi culture usually veers to the left in its political allegory (again, see Battlestar or this summer's upbeat Star Trek that was an endorsement for the hopeful future that the Obama administration promised to usher in). The original 1983 miniseries that the show is based on was an anti-fascist message that preyed on "the aliens are coming, the aliens are coming" invasion fears of the Cold War. This is what it has been warped into. We find it hard to believe that thinly-veiIed conservative propaganda will find a strong foothold with the core sci-fi audience, and as for those leaning to the right, they tend to like their entertainment much more straightforward. Why try to figure out what all those lizard people mean when they can just watch Jack Bauer bash people's heads in on 24? That's their idea of fun.

Our prognosis, keep picking on the president and the only letters that V will get are D.O.A.

• Meet your new action hero overlord: Chris Pine. Already fronting the rebooted Star Trek franchise, Pine has signed on to play the Jack Ryan role previously portrayed by Harrison Ford and Alec Baldwin in a new go-around adapting Tom Clancy's series of espionage novels. [Variety]

• For those CBS and Viacom employees who feel each day the burden of the Redstone yoke, you can take heart today; Sumner is now less your owner than he was last week. The octillionaire mogul has been selling off the debt of his holding company, National Amusements. For now, however, NA still retains the controlling interest. [Variety]

• As the world waits for the final outcome of Vivendi/GE/Comcast talks over the fate of NBC Universal, Nikki Finke reports that Comcast wants the deal "done and announced in November." So there. [DHD]

• Curse be damned! ABC has won the competition to be the next network to fail with a sitcom by a former Friends star, locking up rights to the Matthew Perry project. [THR]

• The Wrap reports that Alex Young, Co-President of Production at 20th Century Fox is being moved out of the job and into a producing deal. Young was a Tom Rothman protege who has been in the job since 2007. [The Wrap]

• Always on the lookout for a feel good project, director Gus Van Sant and novelist Bret Easton Ellis have picked up the rights to "The Golden Suicides," Nancy Jo Sales' Vanity Fair article about the deaths of downtown artists Theresa Duncan and Jeremy Blake. [Variety]

• The creator of the Gilmore Girls is coming to HBO. Exec-Producer Amy Sherman-Palladino has signed a deal to develop a dramedy for the cable network. She described the project as the "story of love, hate, family — and finding the perfect opening line," [THR]

• This is what it's come to in the strange, contorted career of Bill Murray; taking Joe Pesci's leftovers. For those who thought Murray's Zombieland cameo was just a little strange— that he was too big, or had been too big a star for the joke about Woody Harrelson being obsessed with him to completely click — you are right. In an interview with Hitfix, Murray revealed the walk on had been intended for Joe Pesci — with whom the joke would have made a lot more sense — but that Murray took the part after Pesci passed. [Hitfix]

While some attributed the lightness and hope of this summer's successful Star Trek reboot to residual post-Obama good feelings, it was really just a classic genre pic, with zoom around the galaxy, sword fights, explosions and time travel. Not so for the sequel. Re-creator J.J. Abrams, who is writing the script with Robert Orci and Alex Kurtzman, says their sophomore effort needs a message.

The ambition for a sequel to 'Star Trek' is to make a movie that's worthy of the audience and not just another movie, you know, just a second movie that feels tacked on...There needs to be relevance, yes, and that doesn't mean it should be pretentious. If there are simple truths—truths connected to what we live—that elevates any story—that's true with any story."

Orci echos his sentiments and says that they're looking for the right issue to base the second movie around.

We got a lot of fan response from the first one and a considerable amount of critical response and one of the things we heard was, ‘Make sure the next one deals with modern-day issues.' We're trying to keep it as up-to-date and as reflective of what's going on today as possible. So that's one thing, to make it reflect the things that we are all dealing with today.

Just as Battlestar used a bunch of humans wandering through space to tell a story about the Iraq war and religion and D9 shed a new light on apartheid, racism, and awesome alien space suits, Star Trek now wants in on the contemporary allegory racket. We must say that is pretty rad. We love to blow shit up, but when you blow shit up with purpose, you get the thrill of blowing shit up, but don't have the residual guilt of watching something totally idiotic. The way aliens heads explode when you run over them with a warthog in Halo can be like, a metaphor for the way people's head explode when they are run over by a tank in the Middle East. Or something like that.

There are a few other properties out there that could use some similar intellectual gussying up if their writers ever want to get the time of day at the Soho House. Here some suggestion of how a little well-placed subtext can rescue these shows, and their crews, from their own stupidity:

The Hills:Discussing whether to help Kristen throw her birthday party, Audrina tells Heidi that there isn't room for enough people at the club. They tell her the only solution is for her to to decide who isn't allowed in the club and murder them when the place is overcrowded.
Metaphor: The health care debate and death panel misinformation.

Gossip Girl: Blair finds that putting on her headband makes her feel great and tingly all over. When she wants to buy more headbands, she discovers they are illegal and that the U.S. government is in a long, protracted, and expensive battle to keep headbands out of the country and off the streets. She becomes an advocate to free all the headbands and starts a march that has lots of bongos, puppets, and hacky sacking.
Metaphor: The war on drugs and efforts to legalize marijuana.

Family Guy: Peter's stupid conservative neighbors tell him that their dog Brian was not really born in America, but in Kenya, and they claim to have the kennel papers to prove it. If what they say is true, then Peter must put his dog down and then burn him in the public square while walking counterclockwise around the flames to prevent the spirits of evil from invading the country. He doesn't know who to believe.
Metaphor: The Birther movement.

Man Vs. Wild: While out in the wild, Bear Grylls meets an aimless Sherpa. The two fall madly in love. Bear brings the Sherpa home, but everyone denies their love and won't let them get married. They even go so far as the pass a law that forbids reality show hosts from marrying Tibetans. Everyone is really sad.
Metaphor: The gay marriage debate.

Wheel of Fortune: Every time a contestant wins the jackpot, he is given a trip to Guantanamo Bay! It's such a great vacation that they can't tell anyone what happens there or when they're going to be back. But while they are there, they get to enjoy lots of activities that include water. Now they wish they had picked Z, X, Q, and U for their extra letter, then they never would have guessed the puzzle.
Metaphor: Torture.

Take Roger Ebert's scathing review for the Chicago Sun-Times:

If you want to save yourself the ticket price, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination.

Oh, sad robot.

Ray Bennett at the Hollywood Reporter is equally dismissive:

Bay's team of four editors stitch together smashing but meaningless images, though it's as difficult to make out which machine is which as it is to tell what anyone is saying. The noise level — not helped by Steve Jablonsky's relentless score — is super-intense and everyone yells lines at high speed. Because nothing they're saying makes any sense, it's hardly important.

LaBeouf gets little chance to show what charm he might have. Meanwhile, Fox has little to do except look great in a tank top and tight jeans while running in slow motion through flying sand.

Variety and a couple other pubs actually enjoyed the thing, if only for the slickness of the stupidity. But while we're fully expecting the movie to ravage the Fourth of July holiday box office like so many crazed alien robots ravage the lurid curves of Megan Fox, we also wonder how long this dumb-but-bracing genre of summer action pic can last. What with a big, big hit like Star Trek earning glowing notices and being zingy and CGI-packed. Can a schlockist like Michael Bay continue to tread water when more and more talented directors—both visualists and storytellers—successfully raise the bar?

Let's hope not. We mean, watching a toaster come alive and eat Shia LaBeouf may have its place in the world, but it's also nice to at least begin to care about characters and revel in a witty turn of phrase here and there. "Run, oh God, run! The angry space Egyptian robots are coming," barely even counts for camp value these days.

In another of the New York Times' endless stream of stories about How We Live Now (Poorly), the cratering economy of Hollywood is discussed. The Star Trek anecdote comes up, but the Whole Foods angle is refuted by a spokeswoman from Paramount:

But when the television cameras were turned off, and it was time for the after party, Paramount turned down the glamour. Aside from a 27-beam light show at the party's entrance, decorations were sparse, and the food consisted of salad and hummus, causing blog chatter that it came from Whole Foods.

Paramount said no grocery store was involved. The original catering company got the date wrong, a Paramount spokeswoman said, and a stand-in had to be hired at the last minute.

Because Hollywood is, in fact, miserable and broke, Paramount can't afford no damn Whole Foods, even if it is for their screwed-up biggest premiere of the year. Sigh.

That last minute stand-in? We're betting Ralphs.

1) Angels & Demons — $48 million
Certain crazed members of the Catholic church were too busy heckling President Abortion this weekend to see, and then get mad about, the new Dan Brown makes things up movie. Though Angels' opening was about $30 million less than Da Vinci's bow a few years ago, it still did solidly enough, and racked up some $100 million additional ducats in the international box office. We suspect that number would have been higher had the always-lucrative albino Paul Bettany factor been in play.

2) Star Trek — $43 million
Showing great legs in its second weekend, J.J. Abrams' revisionist space drama rode a raft of positive word of mouth to a small 46% decline. While some nerds hate that Romulus and Vulcan are now dead and exploded, regular people were all "who the fuck cares" and got sucked in by images of dreamy/shabby Chris Pine getting eaten alive by lens flares. This bodes very well for a potential sequel, the script for which is already being written. We hear from insiders that in the next film, Jean-Luc Picard will be murdered by Christopher Lloyd and then Whoopi Goldberg's Guinan will inadvertently destroy Starfleet Academy with one of her oversized hats.

3) X-Men Origins: Wolverine — $14.8 million
Despite being sadistically bad, the Hugh Jackman meat show trots along gamely, with a good three-week tally of $151 million clams, domestically. While Wolverine was an obvious choice for the first of Marvel's Origins pictures, future installments ought to be a bit of a harder sell. Watching Professor X play croquet and drink tea and read his nanny's mind might only fare well in the art houses, as James Ivory is attached to helm. And the made-on-the-cheap Storm edition is just clips from Catwoman digitally spliced into The Day After Tomorrow. It'll go straight to Blu-Ray.

4) Ghosts of Girlfriends Past — $6.9 million
Never discount ol' Wooderson! Matthew McConaughey's sad little comedy has kept its manicured claws dug into the public consciousness, despite being surrounded by big tall movies about horny green alien girls and gay Australians with sharp fingernails. While we probably couldn't care less about what this means for Bongos' career, we are hoping that Emma Stone gets some more work out of this. Oh, and Lacey Chabert, too. Because why not. Mean Girls 2: Toaster Strudels' Revenge, anyone?

5) Obsessed — $4.6 million
Yes, this movie continues to make money. Ali Larter has now been thrown through a plate glass window several thousand times. Beyoncé has smacked her gums and said "Oh hellll no" more than all the 90's WB sitcoms combined. And Idris Elba has stood at the window of his fancy office, supposedly thinking about what to do about this hot-ass white lady temp, when in actuality he's thinking back to an understudy role in the West End and, oh dear, should I have just stuck with the theatre after all?

1) Star Trek — $72.5 million
Yes, that intro was belabored. But Star Trek did do well, despite the wold's most important critic, me, finding it a bit underwhelming. While not matching or besting the awful Wolverine's numbers last weekend, Trek did manage to improve on its franchise's last best debut, First Contact's $30 million thirteen years ago, by more than double. Good work everyone! But mostly good work J.J. Abrams, who is basically made of gold at this point. People just love him. And people just love the movie. It got a rock solid A from CinemaScore, which ought to mean good word-of-mouth ticket sales in the weeks to come. Unlike...

2) Wolverine — $27 million
Nobody liked Wolverine. Not even Wolverine liked Wolverine. Jean Grey called it "middling" then enclosed herself in her mind bubble. Professor X awkwardly twiddled his thumbs and then slowly backed his magic wheelchair out of the room. Gambit explosively charged his cell phone and was all "Uh, I gotta get that..." and ran away. Jubilee didn't say anything because no one cares what Jubilee has to say. Cyclops chuckled softly to himself, his visor glowing the ruby red of satisfaction. Psylocke cut a hole in the wall with her telekinetic hand blade and slipped away into the night. And Beast quietly pooped in a corner, reading Chaucer. The movie dropped a steep 68% from last week, because nerds told other nerds who told sorta regular people who told the normals "wait for the DVD." This is bad news for everyone except for me, who is maliciously happy that Taylor Kitsch shan't be as big a star as some predicted.

3) Ghosts of Girlfriends Past — $10.4 million
Speaking of pooping in a corner, Matthew McConaughey's little ghostly romantic comedy about Jennifer Garner paying her Violet bills and Emma Stone trying to get famous and Michael Douglas doing a sad little softshoe while mumbling "see Kitty, I'm not old..." fared just aight in its second weekend. The Dudester can usually go bigger than this, but summer romantic counterprogramming really only works effectively when the lynchpin upon which the whole thing hinges hasn't been sun griddled down to a mostly useless mound of drawling tanned hide.

4) Obsessed — $6.6 million
Boncee, Boncee! She's still got it. Her thriller about killing white ladies while Stringer Bell watches, helplessly aroused, has thrown $56.2 million's worth of blonde bitches down the stairs in three weeks. Which is significant considering the movie only cost about $20 million to make. So expect Boncee to feature in some more thrillers, like The Hand that Rocks the Crib and a remake of A Stranger Among Us, about the Destiny's Child singer moving to Boca.

7) The Soloist — $3.6 million
Jamie Foxx sitting in a dark room, muttering to himself. Yes, that's the plot of the movie. But it's also what happened this weekend, when the actor wrote the AMC in Century City a check for $3.6 million, got some Butterfinger bites, and sat by his lonesome in the theater, trying to figure out what went wrong.

Every review I've read on Star Trek so far, and I think I've read five altogether, not to mention countless blog posts, Tweets and Tumblrs, has been nothing less than a collective circle jerk for this film. Is there anyone out there who saw it and thought that it sucked, or was at least mediocre?!

First, the inevitable viral Digital Short that happens when Justin Timberlake hosts: Timeberlake and Andy Samberg reunite for the "Dick In A Box" sequel, "Motherlover." Cameos from perennial MILF's Patricia Clarkson and Susan Sarandon, masterful comedy.

The show cold-opened with Will Forte as Tim Geithner in a relatively highbrow sketch about a banking stress test. Forte's Geithner impersonation wasn't perfect - or close, for that matter - but the jokes were both fairly topical and spot-on.

JT opened the show with the old standby I'm-Always-On-SNL shtick repeat hosts get to pull at some point. Typically, this is the kind of staid, old, boring shit SNL's writers lean on to devote energy towards other material that isn't funny, either. But: pair it with a musical bend and an effortlessly, ridiculously charismatic Timberlake, and it floats.

More cameos and Star Trek topicality on Weekend Update: Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, and Leonard Nimoy. Finally, the stars get to slag on the fundamentalist fanboy Trekkies who're trashing the franchise's epic revitalization. Fun: watch Keenan Thompson break character at Nimoy's surprisingly decent comedic chops.

Finally, Jimmy Fallon pops in for another Barry Gibb Talk Show with Timberlake. Slightly meandering at times, but the overall effect of seeing (A) Fallon playing characters again and (B) anything that involves Justin Timberlake singing on the show plays well is a nice reminder of the glory days. It's too bad SNL has to keep dipping into the (fairly recent) past to unearth a quality hour of TV, but we'll take what we can get.

The company screwed up the (star)date and time of the big shindig, so while the affair was all snazzily decorated and big-name attended, the caterers had to scramble to Whole Foods and sadly laid out a spread of hummus and dinner rolls.

It's weird they didn't just use the replicators.

Oh good for you Carrie, girl! Chris Noth aka Mr. Big aka John James Preston has signed on to be in the next Sex and the City movie. So I guess that means he and Carrie have stayed together. Do I hear the pitter-patter of little Manolo-clad feet? (Hm, sort of!) [Variety]

Disney has picked up the comedy Boss about a dad whose 21-year-old son somehow becomes his, um, boss. Wasn't this movie already sorta made with Topher Grace and Dennis Quaid? Ah well. Expect some sadsack like Tim Allen to get involved and then some shitty little shit to play the little shit. [Variety]

Because disease is very dangerous in spaceships, Star Trek has delayed its Mexican release date due to the swine flu outbreak. [Variety]

Slow and steady actor Danny Huston has signed on to play Poseidon, god of the sea, in the new Clash of the Titans remake. Scottish actor Kevin McKidd is also playing Poseidon soon, this time for the Chris Columbus directed comedy Percy Jackson. It's reported that in both movies there's a volcano that erupts and then a meteor hits earth while Truman Capote looks on bemusedly. [THR]

Jeffery Katzenberg announced the strongest first quarter ever for his DreamWorks Animation, and that he'd be staying on as CEO for another four years. Hits at DreamWorks have included Monsters vs. Aliens, Bee Movie, and the Madagascar franchise. You know, all the not-Pixar ones. [THR]

By far the best of the 11 Star Trek movies, it must rank as the outstanding prequel of all time...

The picture moves at a terrific pace, and is a satisfying tale of good versus evil, with Eric Bana a highly hissable villain...

This movie really does promise a creative re-birth of science fiction adventure.

In retrospect, perhaps the quality of the film was foreshadowed when Paramount decided to re-up with Abrams a few weeks ago.

Or maybe it's all just advance hype, and the end product will leave us feeling a bit let down, but also intrigued against all reason by hype for the next chapter of the story. But who expect that sort of plot-suspense roller coaster from the creator of Lost??

(Paramount publicity still via)

Ellison, a legend in the world of science fiction—or is it syence fyction now?—wrote a Star Trek episode called "City on the Edge of Forever" in 1967 that starred Joan Collins and won a Hugo Award. CBS paid him for writing it and accounted residuals to him per the Writers Guild contract. But it didn't, according to Ellison, pay him for or even notify him about a whole bunch of other ancillary ways the network made money off the episode, including a three-book series based on it and a "talking Christmas ornament" that many a lonely Trekkie purchased for companionship during Earth Winter.

"[CBS's] Paramount has earned millions exploiting the 'City' teleplay since it was aired in 1967," the suit says. "Yet Paramount has not accounted to Ellison or paid him for such exploitations as it is required to do...."

In a press release, Ellison explained as clearly as he could that he really wants his damn money, adding, "I'm doing it for the 35-year-long disrespect and the money!"

Ellison is also suing the Writers Guild for allegedly dragging its feet in representing him; Ellison says the Guild: "falsely suggesed that Ellison had verbally withdrawn his claim."

The film's Web site recently unveiled a partial interior tour of the USS Enterprise, nicely remodeled after the original owners' slide into '80s-era disrepair. Bedroom/bathroom counts are still forthcoming, but the state-of-the-art teleport-bay bidet hints at the charmingly upscale touches holding you over until more specifics become available.

• 'Star Trek' [Paramount via TrekMovie]

But now that Shatner has a real show—Raw Nerve, on the Biography Channel—his bluster has been turned up a notch, as he insists former Star Trek co-star and snub-happy Gay Bridezilla George Takei needs to be "vetted" before being invited onto his show. Does Takei even want to be on his show? Apparently he does! Could someone bring in Christian Bale to smack the last wheezes of this never-ending cutesy feud out of both of them? ("Ohhhh gooood!!! Dah dah dah dah I didn't get invited to the gay wedd—SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU LITTLE PRICKS! IT'S FUCKING DISTRACTING!!") [YouTube]

Angels and Demons: Having never seen or read The DaVinci Code, we're really not sure what to expect from its sequel. Apparently it involves half-angel/half-demon gargoyles and the word ILLUMINATI, which can be read the same way upside down and looks like something a Suicidal Tendencies fan would have tattooed along his upper back. A few quick flashes of a crucifix branding iron, Ewan McGregor, and a helicopter didn't do much else to tell us what was going on or why we'd want to see this. Scary music though! That choir is clearly trying to tell us something. Turn around, Tom Hanks! The Statue of David is about to stab you!
Execution: 4 Anticipation: 3

Land of the Lost: The crack synergisticists at NBC Universal have done it again, making The Today Show's Matt Lauer a key figure in Land of the Lost. We get a brief glimpse at Cha-Ka and some Sleestaks, Will Ferrell screams a lot and acts wacky. This turns out pretty much exactly how we imagined it would.
Execution: 5 Anticipation: 4

The Year One is the first project written and directed by Harold Ramis since 2002's Analyze That, so it's arriving with high hopes. After watching this two minute scene, we're having trouble honing in on what tone they're going for. The laughs are pretty broad, the language is modern, the performances a little too relaxed. Michael Cera is basically playing George Michael in a caveman outfit; then David Cross and Paul Rudd show up saying they're Cain and Abel (which kind of threw us. Which story are they telling, exactly?) Still, we respect the ballsiness of choosing one simple scene and not bombarding us with every funny line in the movie squeezed into a 30-second spot. (Though we're sure that's coming.) We're cautiously optimistic.
Execution: 4 Anticipation: 6

Star Trek: A vast improvement over the first trailer, we lost a lot of the cheesy dialogue but still get Bruce Greenwood telling a young Kirk, "I dare you to do better." ("I don't know—maybe endorse an internet travel site, or start a YouTube show where you can complain about how John Cho didn't invite you to his gay wedding.") We even meet young Bones, who looks as though he's about to utter his first "Dammit, Jim."
Execution: 8 Anticipation: 8

Fast and Furious 4: With a subtly backhanded tagline ("New Model, Original Parts"), this is probably the most brainless offering, and yet we want to see it. Paul Walker, Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez: the gang's all here. And with about six words spoken in the entire spot, it still kind of thrills us that Walker can make his three sound wooden.
Execution: 7 Anticipation: 7

Transformers: Rise Return Revenge of the Fallen: Holy crap, that looks awesome. We bow down before the Bay.
Execution: 10 Anticipation: 9

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra: We're still convinced this movie was made by France-hating eight-year-olds. No sign of The Doctor™—he must be at one of those latex breath-control fetish parties.
Execution: 4 Anticipation: 4

Up: After the next-level shit going on in Wall-E, it's hard to get excited about a crotchety old man floating around underneath thousands of helium balloons as the annoying kid next door drops the GPS system for comic relief. Still, this is PIXAR, so we're prepared to be dazzled once that house touches down somewhere interesting.
Execution: 8 Anticipation: 7

Monsters vs. Aliens: That material as done-to-death as this still managed to make us smile a few times (there's some nice Dr. Strangelove touches in there) bodes well, though the "lovable monster misfit" thing just feels so tired to us. But don't listen to us. This will make a gazillion dollars.
Execution: 8 Anticipation: 6