You know, like with different retellings of the same event from different perspectives. Not like Courage Under Fire level Rashomon homage. Like Vantage Point level Rashomon homage. But still, you get our point, right? That it'll be kind of interesting to get the "behind the seams" (ugh) look at how the pretty tall people think (or don't) about things and all that. But watching it directly after PR? Maybe not.

We'll give you an episode, Models. But just one!

Yes, we missed this little (read: HUGE) bit of news last week because I was busy weeping from joy/beauty/soaring heartbreak in the Place des Vosges and nobody else here watches this unfortunate pile of misery and pearls of a TV show, but it does, late or not, bear mentioning.

Nikkie Finke reported last week that the intended 80's-set spinoff of the high society kidz show has been axed by The CW. So Gossip Girl is left with a bizarro stand-alone episode about Lily's youthful rebellion in the whiskey-soaked days of rock 'n' roll Venice Beach. Which creates something of a sad curiosity—an Olympic stadium half built, only to have the bid go to another city, a birthday cake sitting in the refrigerator even though little Jimmy died in the grain thresher just this morning, a party dress laid out softly on a bed, curtains billowing in the window, while outside zombies devour everyone. Poor Andrew McCarthy just can't get a break. But Brittany Snow? Consider yourself rescued.

Now, of course, Finke is not the last word on this. People are still acting like the prom queen isn't dead, and she may not be. But with the CW in triage like every other network, it may be time to face the tough turkey: Gossip Girl isn't a hit, it's just a cultural foofaraw. It's no Top Model, it's no One Tree Hill, it's not even Supernatural. So in this day and age, what with the economy and all, a glitzy new wing added to the already empty and echoing Versailles that Cecily von Ziegesar built might not be the best thing toward keeping the monarchy in place. (France!)

So, watch tonight, it could be your first and only time to observe this curious artifact—that lovely new necklace you just bought for charming Miss Marie-Antoinette.

Says THR:

After months of gossip and speculation, "Gossip" creators/exec producers Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage are proceeding with a spinoff that will serve as a prequel to the hot sophomore drama and chronicle the wild teen years of Lily van der Woodsen (Kelly Rutherford) in Los Angeles in the 1980s.

The network has ordered a backdoor pilot for the project, which will air as a "Gossip" episode May 11.

Written by Schwartz and Savage, the spinoff will center on young Lily Rhodes (her maiden name) who, after a falling-out with her parents, is forced to move in with her sister, the black sheep of the Rhodes family. Overnight, Lily has to transition from a life of luxury and schooling at a wealthy Montecito boarding school to living deep in the Valley she once made fun of and going to public school. Caught between two worlds, Lily dives into the fast-paced Sunset Strip and the Hollywood lifestyle of the '80s, journeying over the hill to a world of wealth and excess that used to be her own.

Thank goodness Schwartz and Savage have finally found a time period and setting where they can chronicle spoiled teens snorting cocaine and living lives full of excess! We eagerly look forward to Lily's run-ins with scene rival Angelyne, with whom she tussles for the affection of strangely distant KROQ DJ Rodney Bingenheimer.

• 'Gossip Girl' spinoff moving forward [THR]

Boomp3.com

A reunion of TV teen icons took place at the conclusion of the star-filled Nautica Malibu Triathlon when Saved by The Bell stars Tiffani Thiessen (AKA Kelly Kapowski) ran into Mark-Paul Gosselaar (AKA Zack Morris). As the two caught up on all of each other's exploits, it quickly became apparent that the two looked as if they were transported right back to those magical days at The Max. That is, until Thiessen turned the conversation towards the potential of a Saved By The Bell spin-off. Gosselaar seemed unsure about the idea of a spin off, considering the misfires that were Saved By The Bell: The College Years and Saved By The Bell: The New Class. Thiessen was unrelenting, though, going as far as to use the recent 90210 spin-off as an example of an old show that got a big boost by incorporating some of today's cooler and edgier positions on teen life. Thiessen said, “It would be so much fun. Just imagine the theoretical child of Zack and Kelly raising heck all over Bayside. Meanwhile, Zack would be raising heck in the corporate world or maybe real estate and Kelly is running for vice president or something.”

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.