<![CDATA[Gawker: defamer, snake stories]]> http://tags.gawker.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/gawker.com.png <![CDATA[Gawker: defamer, snake stories]]> http://gawker.com/tag/defamer/snakestories http://gawker.com/tag/defamer/snakestories <![CDATA[Matthew McConaughey's Tale Of The Python Who Didn't Really Do Anything Way Scarier When You're Baked]]> Matthew McConaughey popped by the Late Show with David Letterman last night, having at some point in the hours since his Today Show appearance discovered the magical, groove-restoring properties of greasy hair product. It wasn't long before the actor had a bug-eyed Letterman caught helpless inside his mighty yarn-spinning coils, as he recounted the time during the Fool's Gold shoot when he dispatched a group of adventuresome children to hunt down a mostly inert snake lurking uncomfortably close to his sleeping quarters.

It's a story of breathtaking cowardice that, when relayed with measured intensity in McConaughey's signature Texan drawl, leaves the audience with the impression of the actor having wrestled that 8-foot python to the ground and squeezing the last puffs of air out of its reptilian lungs. Shirtless.


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