The old guard at Defamer simply lurved An Education, the Nick Hornby-penned movie about Carey Mulligan (so affecting in The Seagull on Broadway last year) falling in love with an older, dangerous Peter Sarsgaard (less affecting in that same production.)

It looks like one of those stirring, sentimental-in-the-right-smart-ways, heartachers that always get Oscar buzz but never actually get invited to the big dance. Though, now that there will be a whopping ten Best Picture nominees, maybe this lil' thing will swoop on in.

Speaking of swooping! Here's also a trailer, that's been out a week or so, yes, for Amelia, Mira Nair's misguided-looking biopic of famed aeronautical lesbo-type Amelia Earhart. And who better to play yet another lesbo-type than one Hillary Swank, the worst actress with two Oscars currently working in cinema today? She looks predictably awful in the movie, with an increasingly bedraggled Richard Gere bringing up the rear. The movie is about flying! Of the body and the spirit!

SPOILER ALERT: She dies.

WHAT'S NEW: Shia LaBeouf reunites with his Disturbia director DJ Caruso for the thriller Eagle Eye, featuring our young hero as a man trapped (alongside Michelle Monaghan) in a mysterious mire of surveillance, espionage and murder also featuring Billy Bob Thornton and Rosario Dawson. Hitchcock comes up in more discussions of the film than he doesn't, with the rap being that Eagle Eye represents North by Northwest to Disturbia's too-influential-for-comfort Rear Window, but that's just adults being adults. The kids will toss rose petals and dump around $30.6 million out their wallets, further anchoring LaBeouf as his generation's most bankable star without a driver's license. Congrats, Shia!

Meanwhile, that generation's parents can shuffle into the auditorium next door for the Gere/Lane reteaming Nights in Rodanthe, adapted from a Hallmark card novel by Nicholas Sparks with enough inoffesnsively creaky cliche and Mom Jeans-wetting romance to attract around $13.1 million.

Also opening in limited release: The Palahniuk adaptation Choke; the Charlize Theron-led propaganda ensemble Battle in Seattle; Tim Robbins' and Rachel McAdams' Iraq-themed The Lucky Ones; Wayne Wang's modest immigrant mish-mash A Thousand Years of Good Prayers; the misanthropic Easter bunny comedy Hank and Mike; the race-baiting terrorism saga Shoot on Sight (tagline: "Is it a crime to be a Muslim?"); the Filipina-tranny doc The Amazing Truth About Queen Raquela; and the lyrical, Indie Spirit Award-winning drama August Evening.

THE BIG LOSER: It's not like we actively root against films around Defamer HQ (all right, maybe that one time; it had it coming), and we really would like to see Spike Lee pull off Miracle at St. Anna, his epic WWII semi-mystery focusing long-overdue attention on the Army's 92nd Infantry Division — the only all-black unit to see combat in Europe. He may yet do it with Disney's micro-marketing prowess, but let's be honest: The reviews are brutal, it's 160 minutes long, it's rated R, it rotates between English, German and Italian, and at least a quarter of its intended audience is likelier to defer to one of two sturdy holdovers — Burn After Reading or The Famliy That Preys. If this breaks $5.5 million, we'll be shocked. Sorry, Spike; there's always Inside Man 2.

THE UNDERDOG: We alluded to it earlier this week, but Kirk Cameron's Fireproof — with its born-again title, God-fearing creds and bankable-enough star among Christian audiences — should sneak up on the mainstream, possibly pulling in as much as $4.2 million on 800 screens. Those are Dane Cook-beating numbers, and Lord knows a good Dane Cook beating is something to behold.

FOR SHUT-INS: New DVD's this week include Sex and the City, Leatherheads, the underrated Simon Pegg comedy Run, Fat Boy, Run, Dario Argento's gore opus Mother of Tears and, at long last, Two and a Half Men: The Complete Fourth Season.

So are you planning to drive Shia to the theater, or is it more of an old-people-fucking kind of weekend for you? Are we giving Spike a fair shake? And what to do about this glut at the art house? Call your shots!

Here are a few reasons why we think his films are so popular:

1.) They're completely unrealistic, and we love it.
Clearly, the main reason women love romance movies is that they are ridiculously far-fetched. Sure, our boyfriends would jump on to a moving ferris wheel a la Ryan Gosling to ask us out on a first date! And pale, feeble, Cross-bearers like Mandy Moore could certainly tame popular cool cats like Shane West in A Walk to Remember in real life. We know it's all bullshit, but a girl can dream.

2.) He gets the right people to play the parts.
Okay, when you were in high school, you totally thought pre-ER bad-boy Shane West was a fine piece. And clearly whoever is casting these things still has the knack for it: Channing Tatum is set to star in the upcoming adaptation of Dear John, and obviously Miley is in demand. Plus, James Franco cameo as Richard Gere's son this weekend? Do us.

3.) True love can survive anything.
Gosling goes off to war. And then McAdams-turned-Gena Rowlands goes totally insane at the end of The Notebook and wanders all over the hospital post-midnight. It looks like the house in Rodanthe is about to rot into a piece of driftwood. Are these obstacles too grand to stop a Sparks plotline? Never! True love prevails over all.

4.) Speaking of houses - the ones in the movies are fucking sweet.
Gosling builds McAdams a house. Like, are you serious? It has a ridic balcony so she can paint fields and rainbows and swans on the lake and shit. And though we haven't seen Rodanthe yet, it has blue shutters and is so close to the water the sand stains the windows. We want to live there.

5.) And finally, even old people can get it on in a Sparks flick.
We weren't totally repulsed when Rowlands and James Garner made out at the end of The Notebook, and that's saying something.

CASTING Hamster for short film (los angeles)

I am looking for a hamster.

I know I could buy one, but then I would own it. So , I was hoping to just rent one for 50 bucks for a couple hours.

The Hamster will be work in a studio shoot on a greenscreen. He is playing Rocky, the captain of a boat.

please send a picture

We are shooting for a couple hours on saturday, that is this coming saturday the 28th in Hollywood.

This coming Saturday? Fuck! Our hamster already made plans. Whatever — his headshots haven't arrived yet anyway.

• CASTING Hamster for short film (los angeles) [Craigslist]

5. Taxi Driver: As much as we wanted Iris to get out of the game, we kinda loved imagining New York as a place where you could wander downtown and see girls wearing neon short shorts and big straw hats who looked like Jodie. And, as we all know by now, Spitzer likes 'em young.
4. Monster: No, she wasn't pretty. But she had a fondness for shooting pervs, something we might have considered had they come in the form of her johns. Strictly a cautionary tale for the former governor.
3. Indecent Proposal: We still can't figure out what was so sad about having Woody Harrelson for a husband, Robert Redford as a one-night fling, and $1 mil in the bank. All that time Demi spent crying would have better spent in the sack with either guy. She might be too pricey for Spitzer, though.

2. American Gigolo: With politics no longer looking like a viable career option, we think that Spitzer could learn a thing or two from the way that Julian sauntered through LA as though he owned it. Not only did he make the whole male escort thing look fun, he had the best wardrobe in the city.

1. Pretty Woman: The Porsche that Julia Roberts drove wasn't the only thing that cornered on rails. Go west, young governor, go west!

[Photo Credits: Love To Know, Wild About Movies, EZ Entertainment, Moldy Doily, Taittinger]

• STARS CAUGHT WITH HOOKERS [Us]

There's got to be a buddy movie in here somewhere, maybe one where they go on the lam in the Himalayas, disguising themselves as Tibetan monks in an attempt to get the Dalai Lama to issue a public plea for their pardons. Also: They fall in love with the same woman. And just in the interest of getting this thing made—Will Ferrell plays the Dalai Lama. We think we have a winner here.

• India May Arrest Richard Gere Over Kiss [AP]
• Hugh Grant Arrested on Assault Charge [AP]

Three lawyers have filed complaints in Indian courts against Hollywood actor Richard Gere and Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty for kissing at a public function, a news report said Wednesday.

Two other lawyers filed another complaint in a court in Ghaziabad, a town on the outskirts of the Indian capital, against Shetty and private television channels for showing videos of the kissing incident, the news agency added.

Such cases against celebrities — often filed by publicity seekers — are common in ultraconservative India. They add to a backlog of legal cases in the country that has nearly crippled the judicial system.

Ironically, all the controversy and legal action will only serve to further Gere's original motive—i.e. to stroke his own ego by demonstrating that he still has a dangerously irresistible way with the ladies. If the aging male sex symbol wanted to cause this much fuss over his burning loins back here in Hollywood, he'd literally have to tumble out, shivering and naked, from between the legs of a panty-less starlet as she pulls herself out of a limo on her way inside Hyde.

• Lawyers take action over Gere kiss [CNN.com/AP]

[In New Delhi, at an AIDS prevention benefit, the Indian actress SHILPA SHETTY and the American actor RICHARD GERE take to the podium.]

SHILPA SHETTY
The two of us are here today to help raise AIDS awareness
In a film I once portrayed a woman who was careless.
That film was Phir Milenge—my character caught HIV.
Please heed her example. Do not act so recklessly.

RICHARD GERE
That's right, Shilpa: We need more attention called to this
Issue of safe sex. And now, a little kiss.

[RICHARD GERE kisses SHILPA SHETTY. Immediately there is controversy, as devout Hindus find this public display of affection undignified. Members of Shiv Sena, the Hindu nationalist party, burn images of Gere and Shetty.]

RICHARD GERE
I kissed her, yes, it's true
A gentle little peck.
I got her on the hands and cheek
Not on the breast and neck.

And yet the second my lips touched,
India ignited.
(It's just the women, usually,
Who find themselves excited.)

A thousand angry Hindu men
Have organized a posse
To burn my effigy with sticks
In the streets of Varanasi.

SHILPA SHETTY
I am hardly a stranger to controversy
In fact, you could say we're best friends
There are times I lay in bed and dream of calmer waters
But the turbulence upon the ocean never seems to end

In 2003 my parents were arrested
Charged with extortion, accused of underworld ties,
In 2006, I was upbraided for a photograph
In which I posed with Reema Sen in sexy ways: Oh, shield your eyes!

On Celebrity Big Brother, I suffered vicious racist taunts
Like "Shilpa Fuckawallah" and "ugly dog": Is that what any woman wants?
But even these humiliations were not sufficient preparation
For the way that Richard's kiss would infuriate my nation.

Did he show affection?
It's fair to say he did
But how was he to know
That it is so forbid?

Or is the word forbidden?
I'm rattled by this fuss
It was just a kiss, a smack,
A tiny insubstantial buss.

[The leaders of Shiv Sena defend the protests. Obscenity complaints are filed against Shetty and Gere in separate courts in Rajasthan and Uttar Pradesh. Gere flies to Tibet to address concerns about Tibetan refugees passing through Nepal.]

RICHARD GERE
I'd like to put it all behind me
I have other things to do
Do you know how many unkissed women
There are right here in Katmandu?

I know I've sparked an outrage
And countless late-night jokes
I wish that I felt worse about it.
Please go see The Hoax!

Ben Greenman is an editor at the New Yorker and the author of several books of fiction. His latest book, A Circle is a Balloon and Compass Both, is just being published.

Previously: Fragments From 'Imus! The Musical'

Late yesterday afternoon, we briefly noted the flap over international gigolo Richard Gere's osculatory battery of Indian actress Shilpa Shetty at a New Dehli AIDS rally, which prompted outraged protestors to set ablaze effigies of the satyr/activist for his public violation of their cherished star. Since we realize that our previous, blockquoted summary of the story was woefully inadequate in fully communicating the intricacies of this complicated matter, we point you to the fine work of Access Hollywood Cultural Analyst William "Billy" Bush, whose deep knowledge of Indian mores allow him to break down the shocking video of the event frame by frame and explain Gere's transgression with Zapruderesque attention to every taboo-violating detail.

• Access Hollywood
• Previously: Richard Gere Causes Uproar In India After Publicly Sampling The Busty Bollywood Goods [Defamer]

Actor Richard Gere has sparked protests in India after kissing Celebrity Big Brother winner Shilpa Shetty at an Aids awareness rally in New Delhi.

Demonstrators in Mumbai (Bombay) set light to effigies of the Hollywood star, while protesters in other cities shouted "death to Shilpa Shetty"...Public displays of affection and sex are still largely taboo in India.

Of course, this is not the first time Gere has raised eyebrows by wooing an off-limits, famous foreign face abroad, as the International Gigolo once seduced the Japanese Prime Minister with a waltz in plain sight of cameras. Feeling terrible about his blasphemous PDA, Gere has magnanimously sworn to make amends with the outraged Indian people, offering to suck face with Bollywood studmuffin leading man Abhishek Bachchan in front of a crowd of cheering thousands at a second AIDS rally.

• Gere kiss sparks India protests [news.bbc.co.uk]

Richard Gere has co-written a song with Lionel Richie to raise awareness about the spread of AIDS in India.

The Pretty Woman veteran is following in the footsteps of Sharon Stone who helped write new track "Come Together Now" in a bid to raise money for the victims of August's Hurricane Katrina.

The Buddhist actor has pledged to help spread the message about HIV to India's youth via the country's version of Pop Idol and American Idol.

He explains, "We did some stuff with Indian Idol. I asked Lionel Richie if he had a song like "We Are The World," and he did.

"We changed some lyrics and created a song around HIV and responsibility, they (contestants) performed it on the show."

Their hearts are true, but may we humbly suggest that in future interviews, Gere and Richie drop the tad-too-honest song recycling backstory? It kind of gives the whole affair a slapdash feel, which is not exactly the tone you want to hit when encouraging the youth of developing nations to go the extra safe-sex mile. Even Stone managed to work through her "what rhymes with Katrina?" hurdles and throw together a few original bars for her disaster relief effort.

• GERE PENS AIDS SONG WITH RICHIE [Contact Music]