Gawker: defamer, ratatouille

Newsroom Cafe Update: Real Life Ratatouille Not Nearly As Popular As Movie

Regan — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 14:15:00 EDT

While health inspectors may have fallen head over heels in love with Pixar's restaurant impresario "Little Chef", it seems they can't stomach a vermin infestation at mold-friendly Newsroom Cafe. The eatery, favored by pseudo vegetarian starlets, went from achieving average status to full-blown suspension in a shake of a rat's tail. The restaurant is understandably befuddled after receiving the notice of closure since the soup-diving, steak tartare-preparing rats appeared so lovable on screen. But, the now relevantly monikered establishment plans to turn things around.

Newsroom's course of action to once again regain its status as the official celebu-haunt serving overpriced, mildly edible fare is radical, if not brilliant. The Verminators won't be needed here. Instead, we hear that Paris Hilton will be outfitted with a bullhorn, and her adorably, giggly, child-like voice will lure the rats away from the restaurant to the nearest production company, where one lucky rat will compete to become her new BFF. The losers will be killed and fed to her army of chihuahuas.

Newsroom Cafe: I Smell A Rat [TMZ.com]

Hackford's Begging Finally Induces Oscar-Winning Wife To Work With Him Again

Mark — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 15:38:58 EDT

· Ray director Taylor Hackford convinces "very busy" wife Helen Mirren and semi-retired actor Joe Pesci to star in Love Ranch, the heartwarming tale of the man who established Nevada's first legal brothel, his madam spouse, and the boxer gunned down by a bodyguard for his suspected sexual involvement with the aforementioned Mustang Ranch proprietress. [Variety]
· Justice League director George Miller is auditioning virtually every young actor in Hollywood (Adam Brody! Minka Kelly! Mary Elizabeth Winstead!) during a "marathon casting session" running through today, hoping that the cattle call will help him fill coveted parts like Superman, Batman, the Flash and Wonder Woman with talent cheap enough to stay together for several movies. [THR]
· Led Zeppelin is finally making their music available online, with the band's entire catalogue hitting the internets on November 13. Also: the "Black Dog" ringtone you've been wanting since you were sixteen will soon be made available. [Variety]
· CBS wins Sunday night after the Patriots-Cowboys game runs long, though ABC's Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters both put up better numbers than last week. [THR]
· Overseas moviegoers continue to delight in Pixar's animated story of a talented rat who saved a fading French bistro by flouting Paris's overly restrictive restaurant cleanliness laws. [Variety]

Moviegoers Find Rats In A Restaurant Surprisingly Delicious

Mark — Mon, 02 Jul 2007 11:33:31 EDT

This Monday morning is no less painful than any other on the calendar, but at least you only have to survive 48 hours before you're rewarded with a day off. Cling to the weekend box office numbers as you try to make it through the excruciating two days that stand between you and illegal firework displays, backyard barbecues, and egregious midweek drunkenness:

1. Ratatouille—$47.227 million
Another summer, another critically beloved animated feature that tops the box office on its opening weekend, extending Pixar's years-long consecutive hits streak. But now that the studio has proven it can push to number one a movie with a premise as theoretically unsavory as filthy, health-code flouting rodents running amok in the kitchen of a French restaurant, they'll seek a challenge that will properly tax their unparalleled hitmaking talents: development has begun on Crabs, the story of some misunderstood, but ultimately lovable, genital lice making their home in the overgrown pubic hair of a Hungarian prostitute. Summer 2009 opening weekend gross: $53 million.

2. Live Free or Die Hard—$33.150 million
As we predicted on Friday, the lure of John McClane blowing shit up on a midsummer Friday night was too strong to resist, and we cast this weekend's $14 box office vote for Die Hard, even though we found Fox's promotional efforts a little lacking. Well, except for the one where a shitfaced Bruce Willis promised us we'd have a good time at his movie:

3. Evan Amighty—$15.089 million
It seems that God has sent a clear message to Hollywood: Stop fucking up My perfectly good stories with your CGI nonsense. (A disappointing box office run hurts Hollywood much worse than a flood ever could.)

4. 1408—$10.610 million
1408 IMDb Fun Fact: the film's Young Woman at Book Signing has no other credits, but we think this is the beginning of an impressive career.

9. Sicko—$4.5 million
Illegally downloading copies of Sicko is so easy that even political candidates in Ohio can show you how to do it!

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE June 29-July 1, 2007 [Box Office Mojo]

Rat Vs. Willis

Mark — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 15:29:05 EDT

· After a summerlong run of sequel-clogged weekends where the eventual winner of the box office battle was all too obvious, the outcome of the upcoming Die Hard vs. Ratatouille fight seems up for grabs. We're not betting against Pixar, even though we'll probably wind up watching John McClane blow shit up. [Variety]
· Oh yeah Die Hard made $9.1 million on Wednesday, its first official day of release. Is that a lot? We're not good with midweek box office record data. [THR]
· Universal signs up erstwhile Biggest Comedy Star In the World Jim Carrey for Sober Buddies, one of those magical projects with a title so concise that we don't have to waste any time explaining it. (OK, OK, Carrey is a Sober Buddy who falls off the wagon while helping an alcoholic pal on a business trip in Vegas. Hilarity ensues, etc etc.) [Variety]
· 3.2 million viewers tuned in to CNN to for Larry King's post-jail interview with Paris Hilton. While this was King's highest rated show since 2005, consider that three times more people watched So You Think You Can Dance on Wednesday night if you'd like to feel a little better about the public's TV-watching taste levels. [THR]
· We would never ask you to start thinking about the Oscars in late June. That's just sick, really. [Variety]