Twenty-five or thirty years ago, you became famous, what's the worst that could happen to you? Page 6? Cindy Adams? Liz Smith? There weren't cell phones with cameras. Waiters didn't listen to your conversations and send them to Drudge or Defamer or Gawker or Jezebel or Agent Bedhead. Now we're all Japanese. We're a nation of paparazzi. And it's okay. You make your peace with it. We get so many rewards, we're much more remunerated than other people, so I guess we should take more licks than other people, too.

There's a fabulous gift package awaiting whichever of you little Japanese shutterbugs sends us the first legitimate Malkovich PrivacyWatch sighting, including (but not limited to) Defamer StarPlus™ commenting status, a John Malkovich Halloween mask you can reprint and recreate the Being John Malkovich restaurant scene with, and—best for last—a date with the Defamer editor of your choosing! (Some restrictions apply.)

[Photo credit: Jake Chessum for Esquire]

• What I've Learned: John Malkovich [Esquire]

as a faithful reader of your blog, I just wanted to tell you about the AWESOME drama at the DGA Awards Saturday night at the Century City Hotel. Things were pretty calm for the dinner, but once the award portion of the evening began, has-been actress Sean Young started to get rowdy. She started talking loudly through out the show...at times screaming in French at the stage when that French actress from La Vie en Rose [Ed. Note - That'd be Marion Cotillard] took the stage..at other times breaking into song. She yelled at a video clip of George Clooney from Michael Clayton and then would start nuzzling the neck of her date (who seemed oblivious) but it was when Julian Schnabel took the stage toward the end of the evening that she really went kook...yelling at him to "get on with it" and to "move it on" (The DGA Awards are unique, they let all of the film nominees say something about their films and thank their crews before naming the winner at the end of the night). Julian yelled back at her to "Have another drink, Honey" and started to leave the stage before the crowd yelled at him to stay. He continued to talk and Sean stood up and mad a big production of putting on her white fur coat, walking around in a circle and then taking her seat again. Finally a security guard came over and grabbed her arm and yanked her through the tables to the side door and tossed her out. Still can't figure out who her date was (he looked like a lawyer type..an ohhhh he's going to get it at work come Monday).

Oh yes, there's other thing that we just remembered that gives this tale even a bit more creedence. Sean Young told Entertainment Weekly back in September about her unsuccessful attempts to crash Vanity Fair's annual Oscar party back in 2006. We find that to be very Interesting Spice.

UPDATE: Looks like Var's Kris Tapley may have been the first one to break this story. Check out his recap, posted earlier this afternoon at 12:02pm.

Just saw Buster from Arrested Development buying DVDs of either season 1 or 2 of his own show at the Fox Studio Store. Totally nice guy, smiles and acknowledgement for all. The cashier at THE FOX STUDIO STORE did not recognize him and asked for his studio ID. Buster looked up and with a smile politely pointed to his picture on the box and stated "that's me." Everybody laughed.

Sadly, the cashier's faux pas was an excellent illustration of why Arrested got the ax: at the end of the day, simply not enough people were watching. That's little comfort, however, for the fans who will miss it. And even less for its actors Hale's DVD purchase is clearly a sentimental attempt at reliving the misty water colored mem'ries of the way things were.

• Previously: Trade Round-Up: Arrested Development Deathwatch Over? [Defamer]
• Arrested Development Deathwatch Begins Anew [Defamer]