<![CDATA[Gawker: defamer, polaroid beach house]]> http://tags.gawker.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/gawker.com.png <![CDATA[Gawker: defamer, polaroid beach house]]> http://gawker.com/tag/defamer/polaroidbeachhouse http://gawker.com/tag/defamer/polaroidbeachhouse <![CDATA[Celebutard Refugees Set Adrift With Banning Of Corporate Beach Houses]]> Kicking back at a corporate summer rental has quickly become a rite of passage for the Hollywood scenewhore set, with Malibu hot spots like the Polaroid Beach House leaving the doors to their 24-hour party open to any celebutards and hanger-entourages who happen to pop by. In exchange, guests must agree to be photographed interacting with a wide variety of branded goods—from snack foods to gadgets to indestructible prophylactics—by the flock of seagull-displacing paparazzi lurking outside. Not surprisingly, neighbors quickly grew weary of the sound of Paris Hilton teetering on a deck table at 4 a.m. screaming, "Playboy Energy Drink and Doritos® Spicy Sweet Chili Chips are hot!" A Malibu city ordinance has now banned such further promotional whorehousing from reoccurring in the summer of '08:

"Imagine parties every night until 4 in the morning when you're trying to sleep just eight feet away in the house next door," said Councilman Andy Stern, who sponsored the new ordinance.
"These weren't just people having a good time; they were commercial enterprises in residential areas that would be operating 24/7 during the summer months." [...]

The new ordinance is expected to go into effect April 24, pending final approval.

Longtime locals are likely breathing a sigh of relief that they won't again have to run into some supporting player from The Hills, slapping them on the back at the Country Mart and telling them, "Yo—D-Gef! What is up, my man? You gotta swing by the 'Roid tonight. I'm spinning ambient skull-hop into the early morning hours and Linz is making her killer nachos. It'll be off da chains!" before skipping off to their Source-branded Hummer and peeling onto the PCH.

[Photo: WireImage]

]]> http://gawker.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=368896&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Deep Inside The Polaroid Beach House]]> polaroid-tour.jpg
More than any celebutard hotspot, it's the Polaroid Beach House in Malibu that's become the default destination for Hollywood scenewhores and B-listers (and even a dash of A-!) looking to spend some leisure time comingling among their own kind. Until now, our views of Lindsay Lohan Relapse Ground Zero have only been from afar—but no longer: People.com has posted this informative video, in which Jonathan Silverman of...uh...The Single Guy?...and his lovely wife Mrs. Jonathan Silverman offer us a tour of the comfy, corporate-branded property.

(They never quite explain what they're doing there, but seem extremely settled, so we'll just assume the company offered a down-on-his-luck Jonathan permanent lodging in exchange for a pledge to somehow incorporate the phrase "Shake it like a Polaroid picture!" at some point in his next guest-starring gig.) Viewers will want to take special note of the kitchen, which has been "completely redesigned and is quite stunning"—those old Polaroid Beach House countertops were so '80s, and not in the good way—and particularly the fridge contents, where you can never store enough Playboy Energy Drink for famous, thirsty guests who might stop by after a hard day of waiting for an agent's call.

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