[Narita, Japan; January 27. Images via Getty]

Now, in his Rolling Stone cover story profile, Brad Pitt shares: "Our seven-year-old was searching the word 'weapons' on Google the other day and ended up on some white-supremacist site. I'm sure now we're on all kinds of watch lists." We're certain this is all just part of a boyish, completely natural fascination with the implements of war, however, and won't throw up any red flags until we receive word that Maddox has officially slaughtered and gutted his first wild boar as part of a four-day, independently undertaken survival campaign in the French wilderness. [ONTDvia Lindsay Robertson]

It's been a week since the hoards of press gathered at the Jolie-approved press conference to learn that nothing has happened, is happening, will happen for "weeks to come." And without vital information such as this, the media was forced to gather these stories from the next best source: disgruntled hospital staff.

"I think she's in meltdown mode. She's been getting upset if there's not enough ice in her glass."

To be fair, an adequate amount of ice, a perfect drink makes.

But far worse, Jolie has abandoned her typical Jolie behavior like tatoo-ing Mr. Jolie's back or proudly commending Maddox on his Charlton Heston-y ways and instead, has morphed into some sort of mousy-haired housewife from Kansas:

She's not walking around anymore. She doesn't even take a shower early in the morning. She just stays in bed, talking on her phone, typing on her computer, reading magazines and watching TV.

Luckily, Jolie will soon return to her Benetton-approved family and enjoy adequately iced beverages because the World's Most Important Pregnancy is scheduled to conclude via c-section on Tuesday.

"Shit," said the unborn twins.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

• Heavily pregnant Angelina Jolie 'fed up and can't wait for twins to be born' [Daily Mail]

Of all the pictures of Britney, her post-umbrella carnage rage face is an admittedly charming choice, but we're not as thrilled to see Jack Black making his Holier-And-Far-Wittier-Than-Thou face. As for the Paul Reubens tat, the fan was at least smart enough to use a Pee Wee Herman pic, rather than an image of Paul huddled in a dirty movie theater with hands occupied. And poor, poor Patrick Swayze. While we'll likely never know exactly why or how someone got the idea to tattoo themselves with Patrick Swayze as a centaur, at least we're glad to see him wearing his outfit from the infamous SNL Chippendales skit (although, Chris Rock might have a different opinion).

By far the single most frightening Bob Barker image we've ever seen (shouldn't the text read "Come On Down And Fondle My Cock!" instead?). Maddox is not the worst tattoo idea in the world, but why does his tongue resemble the Devil's? Oprah looks the best we've ever seen her look on one fan's arm, but this sneering Zack Morris image has officially scarred our fond memories of the big blond man on campus for life.

[Photo credits: EW]

• CELEBRITY SKIN: 21 TATTOOS OF FAMOUS FACES [EW]