Gawker: defamer, liz lemon

Six Degrees Of Carrie Bradshaw's Vagina

Jessica — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 15:20:00 EDT

There was a time when a place in Carrie Bradshaw's vagina was the most coveted hot spot in premium cable. Honest-to-goodness stars like Vince Vaughn and Mikhail Baryshnikov visited Carrie's wonder spot, but it's not what you could do for Bradshaw's bits, it's what Bradshaw's bits could do for you. Just like Courtney Love, who famously said, "I have a magic pussy, If you fuck me, you become a king," doing time in Carrie's nether regions is a one-way ticket to televised success in 2008. Carrie Bradshaw's boyfriend is officially the new Jerry Seinfeld's girlfriend, as TV stars like Teri Hatcher, Marcia Cross, and SatC's own Kristin Davis did it with Jerry before they hit the big time. After the jump, find out the four men who originally appeared as Carrie's beaux and are now part of the most critically acclaimed shows of the year.

Dean Winters
Role on Sex: Carrie's fuck buddy John McFadden. After her second massive break from big, Carrie attempts to make her fuck buddy John into a real boyfriend. This attempt fails miserably.
Where Is He Now: Since his hard time in Carrie, Dean Winters moved on to greener pastures: he has a recurring role as Liz Lemon's hilariously deadbeat boyfriend on 30 Rock, Dennis "the beeper king" Duffy. He also has a recurring role on Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.

John Slattery
Role on Sex: Bill Kelley, an up-and-coming politician and total silver fox. His relationship with Carrie fizzles because he's obsessed with golden showers.
Where Is He Now: As silvery and foxy as ever, John plays slimy-yet-handsome ad exec Roger Sterling. He also had a recurring role on Desperate Housewives, but our hearts belong to Roger.

David Duchovny
Role on Sex: Carrie's erstwhile high school boyfriend Jeremy. He lives in Denver, but has taken a trip out East so he can go to a mental institution. His relationship with Carrie is a no-go because of his mental fragility, but that did not preclude them from knocking the boots a couple times.
Where Is He Now: We all know that David stars as a sex addict on the acclaimed Showtime dramedy Californication and also in his actual life. He was already a bona fide TV star before his time on Sex, but perhaps his time in Carrie-land inspired him to take the more emotionally complex role of Hank Moody on Californication.

Craig Bierko
Role on Sex: Creepy jazz-obsessed Ray King. Things do not work out with Carrie because he can barely hold a conversation that doesn't involve music.
Where Is He Now: earlier this year, Craig starred in a Fox sitcom called Unhitched with Rashida Jones. He played Jack 'Gator' Gately, a 35-year-old who recently divorced his college sweetheart. He is back in the dating scene and totally clueless. Even though it was produced by There's Something About Mary scribes Bobby and Peter Farrelly, the show was canceled after six episodes. However, we know that Carrie holds a leprauchan-ish pot of gold between those gams of hers, so we have high hopes that Craig's TV career will rebound in the near future!

Has Liz Lemon Been In The Tank For McCain All Along?

Kyle Buchanan — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 17:15:00 EDT

Though we noted a while back that Tina Fey as Liz Lemon and VP candidate Sarah Palin share more than a passing resemblance, we were quick to point out their dramatic differences on issues like gay marriage, the economy, and crappy exes. Our Liz Lemon is a dyed-in-the-wool Democrat, we insisted — until Good as You reminded us that in a self-flagellating monologue during season one of 30 Rock, Lemon admitted that though she might tell her friends she was supporting Barack Obama, she'd likely cast a secret vote for John McCain. Is Fey, then, that much-pursued Hillary voter who can be lured to John McCain by nothing more than a fellow set of horn-rimmed glasses? Perhaps that Life cover shoot was more prescient than we realized... [Good as You]

This Cover of 'Life' May Be The Closest You'll Ever Get To Tina Fey as Sarah Palin

Kyle Buchanan — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 16:45:00 EDT

When we pointed out last week that potential veep candidate Sarah Palin bore a strong resemblance to Tina Fey as Liz Lemon (except for their stances on important social issues), never did we imagine the proof would come in the form of this Life cover from September 2004. Striking a remarkably similar pose to her current Rolling Stone spread (what is it with her and men with ties?), Fey needs little else besides an exotically named brood and a hilarious accent to complete her remarkably accurate Palin impression. In fact, according to Poynter Online, the cover shoot may have given John McCain some ideas:

He was thrilled to meet her and they got along very well: They had lunch and he gave her an impromptu tour of the Senate building. Makes us wonder if when McCain met Palin for the first time, he said, 'You know, you remind me of someone..."

We're a little skeptical that the Life shoot was McCain's first introduction to Fey — after all, he'd previously guest-hosted on Saturday Night Live while Fey was still head writer. And, as long as we're pouring cold water on rumors, let's dash the hopes many hold that Fey will cameo on the SNL season premiere as Palin. Something tells us that SNL will be spoofing Palin until the election (and beyond), in which case they'll probably use a regular like the Palin-a-like Casey Wilson. Still, let's enjoy the Life cover as a snapshot of what could have been. Lord knows, Fey has more pressing concerns to handle right now.

Poynter Online

Breaking News: Jennifer Aniston is a desperate,...

Kyle Buchanan — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 15:20:00 EDT

Breaking News: Jennifer Aniston is a desperate, man-obsessed stalker...on a fall episode of 30 Rock, shooting right now in New York! The former Friends actress will play Claire Harper, a "free-spirited, Fatal Attraction-like stalker" (and ex-roommate of Tina Fey's Liz Lemon) who falls for Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin). After his efforts to rebuff her finally sink in, "Claire" will go a bunny-killing rampage that coincidentally claims the lives of Aniston enemies John Mayer and Wendy Williams. "No one told you life was gonna end this way," she will sing, before the clap-clap-clap of her handgun brings the scene to a close. [Us]

Sarah Palin vs. Liz Lemon: Who'd Make the Better Veep?

Kyle Buchanan — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:38:16 EDT

Shocking news today as John McCain refuted his choice of Heidi Montag as vice president, instead settling on heavily lip-glossed Alaskan governor Sarah Palin. As Jeff Wells notes, Palin has a certain resemblance to Tina Fey as Liz Lemon: the horn-rimmed glasses, the messy up-do, the required fealty to an older, conservative man in charge. But where does each stand on the issues? We combed through their records (and Hulu) to find out — the results, after the jump:

QUALIFICATIONS

Palin: Former mayor of a small Alaska town, she was elected governor of the state in 2006 and has served less than two years in that office.

Lemon: "Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? This moi."

GAY MARRIAGE

Palin: Against gay marriage and supports a federal gay marriage ban.

Lemon: "Just because I think gay dudes should be allowed to adopt kids and we should all have hybrid cars doesn't mean I don't love America."

THE ECONOMY

Palin: Believes that the Republicans can help get the economy and markets back on track, aimed to reduce general fund spending in Alaska by $150 million.

Lemon: "I've got, like, 12 grand in checking."

EXES

Palin: The Alaska legislature is investigating whether she put pressure on a state official to fire her ex-brother-in-law, a state trooper.

Lemon: "Last week was my birthday and everyone forgot except Dennis. He called and we went out and it wasn't weird."
Jenna: "And how was the sex?"
Lemon: "Fast and only on Saturdays—it's perfect!"

In conclusion, Barack Obama must immediately retract his nomination of Joe Biden, thus leaving him free to appoint fictional character Liz Lemon the new vice president of the Unites States of America.

Specs Thing [Hollywood Elsewhere]

Earlier today, we wondered aloud as to what...

Mark Graham — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 18:07:00 EDT

Earlier today, we wondered aloud as to what Tina Fey could have possibly seen in Josh Hartnett's body of work that would lead her to think that he would be a suitable love interest for her character on 30 Rock. Well, it turns out that our speculation was for naught, as we have recently learned that the original OK! Magazine piece that ran this morning appears to be patently false. In an email communication just sent to Defamer HQ, an NBC spokeswoman told us that there's "Absolutely no truth to this story. OK magazine has it wrong..." Phew! This news not only soothes our irritable tummies, but it also fills our hearts with joy. While we bear no ill will towards Mr. Hartnett, we must admit that we can think of at least two dozen actors off the top of our heads who would make a better suitor for Liz Lemon. Yes, even Ashton Kutcher!