The starry-eyed Kitson wannabe Intuition, who assures online shoppers they cater "to celebrities and Hollywood wives" in case you were worried, has an exclusive first look at Lindsay's highly anticipated leggings line, and the rumored public blow job volunteer has delivered a mini-preview that does not disappoint. In another apparent homage to her (yes, we get it already) icon Marilyn Monroe, the entire collection is called "6126," Monroe's birthday, and one standout pair is named the "Mr. President Leggings," an eyesore that comes with built-in knee pads. Get it?! Like, when you're doing a striptease and croaking out "Happy Birthday, Mr. President" to your nearly unconscious beau of the moment, a mere $132 will ensure a blurry morning after without any pesky knee scrapes for once!

[Photo credits: Shop Intuition]

• ROD TOWNSEND [Rod Townsend]

10. Gift certificate to California Closets – Storing pocketless leggings will never be a problem again.
9. Offer to "bind" scripts in brown paper bags – It sounds silly, but little Lindsay never experienced high school
8. Black Sharpies – "I Love Samster" "Lindsay Lohan"
7. Silk boxers
6. Dinner at Pink Taco – Harry Morton will take night off
5. Georgia O'Keefe painting
4. 5 cases of Red Bull and a threesome with a Marilyn Monroe impersonator – Fulfills dreams on several levels
3. Hat rack specifically designed for Fedoras
2. Mix Tapes – Don't worry, Ronson is hip and old school. You can tell from the t-shirts she wears
1. Large tube of 100 SPF sunscreen — Why risk cancer when A) you're pale skinned and B) you've found the love of your life?

Happy anniversary, kids!

[Photo Credit: X17]

• Lindsay Lohan Samantha Ronson Text Message I Love You [Popcrunch]

Back in March of this year, the new roomies exchanged matching rings with each other's initials on them, reminiscent of those grade-school toys girls would trade with their BFFs to instill some naive sort of pact that you'll be tied by the bond of clunky plastic. But a month later, several blogs noticed that Lindsay had swapped her "SR" eyesore for the more self-referential "LL" version worn until then by Ronson. Though Lindsay gave up the signifier in recent months, devoted Sam has been wearing her misty neon-colored memory right up until this weekend while shopping with Linds. But Lohan has a new ring to flaunt. As a source told the paper, "It's not an engagement ring - simply a token of her commitment. Lindsay is thrilled and she and Sam are very content." Sure, though we think "content" is really an understatement these days. After making the mistake of looking over those recently discovered saliva-swapping pictures of the pair, we have a feeling that far dirtier words should be used to describe just how thrilling this honeymoon phase is.

[Photo credits: Splash, X17]

• LINDSAY LOHAN, SAMANTHA RONSON ENGAGED? 'COMMITMENT RING' SAYS YES! [Post Chronicle]

In Ciccone's book, set for release next Tuesday, her brother reportedly blames his estrangement from Madonna on Guy's anti-gay attitude: "Ciccone, who is gay, alleges that his relationship with Madonna went downhill after she married Ritchie...because of the director's homophobic tendencies." Of course, we find it hard to believe that someone like Madonna, who Ciccone also claims planted a very steamy kiss on Gwyneth Paltrow during a decadent late-night birthday party years ago, would side with anyone carrying anti-gay baggage around.

Chris also promises to expose his sister's ancient habits of partaking in (shocker!) mini-drug parties every now and then with her music producers. But in today's drug-infested celebrity culture, sharing a joint or two with your boss in the music studio sounds downright G-rated compared to her fellow Brits' current escapades, filming themselves smoking crack, feeding crack to kittens, and snorting posher crack on dirty mirrors in the vicinity of yet another drug crusador, Pete Doherty. And lesbian flings? Please. Not only are same-sex couples all the rage at the moment, but they've become just as yawnworthy as the so-called scandalous details surrounding the Gwynnie kiss. I mean, it's Gwyneth Paltrow. Any "secrets" painting the hooker heel fanatic in a naughty new light are music to the burgeoning sexpot's ears.

[Photo credits: Getty, Busted His Nut]

• MADONNA'S BROTHER SAYS SHE SNOGGED GWYNETH AT A BOOZY PARTY [The Sun]
• SHOCKING DETAILS IN MADONNA BIOGRAPHY [AOL News]

Instead of Corey Feldman, try Corey Haim: At the time of Drew’s fling with Feldman, picking between the two Coreys was a matter of Eeny Meeny Miney Mo, Catch A Cokehead By The Toe. Judging by their subsequent trajectories, Drew may have made the wiser choice. But it’s the other Corey, sent to the bottom of his pill bag by Defamer commenters, who currently needs all the help Drew’s strawberry-scented guffaws can bring.

Instead of Luke Wilson, try Owen Wilson: Maybe back in the late 90s Luke seemed like the more intriguing Wilson. His nose wasn’t quite as broken as his brother’s, Owen hadn’t bewitched us all with his Hans in Zoolander, and Luke had yet to permanently banish himself from crush lists by actually sharing screen time with Jessica Simpson. But if Drew goes back to the Wilson well, Owen is clearly the front-runner these days.

Instead of Tom Green, try Dane Cook: Because the barren landscape of horrendously unfunny comedians has a new mascot, and Drew’s fondness of sticking her tongue down her boyfriend’s throat might be the only way to shut this one up.

Instead of Justin Long, try PC Guy: Because John Hodgman is a treasure and deserves some action. Bonus points for Drew if she agrees to film a cameo in the next Apple commercial, makes Justin cry, short-circuit whatever totally awesome new Mac he’s holding, and permanently erase that smirk from his face.

[Photo credits: Wireimage, Getty]

• STAR EXCLUSIVE! DREW BARRYMORE AND JUSTIN LONG: IT'S OVER! [Star]

"What luminaries attended this Capote-esque soiree?" you ask. Why only the brightest lights this town has to offer. We're talking Joel and Benji Madden (gasp!), Audrina Partridge (swoon!), Sean Stewart (who?), Evan Ross (double who?), Jamie Lynn Sigler (meh), and David Spade (WAY too old). Even E! reality stars Dina and Ali Lohan managed to sneak past the bouncers.

Yet, behind that velvet rope the party turned out to be pretty mild. Lindsay stuck to drinking Red Bull all evening, and according to People Magazine, "Just after midnight, Teddy's wheeled out a large pink sheet cake featuring a picture of Marilyn Monroe in her iconic wind-blown white dress. The entire lounge sang "Happy Birthday" and Lohan obligingly blew out the candles."

Kind of boring, eh? Well to make up for such an uneventful evening, we feel it is our duty to tell you that Star Magazine is reporting that Samantha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan have been seen buying sex toys together! Feel a little more titillated now? Good. That's what we're here for.

[Photo Credit: X17]

• Lindsay Lohan Turns 22 with Samantha Ronson at Her Side [People]

Even amidst news that she may have another hormonal little sister stepping on her coattails, Lohan looked more upbeat than ever walking hand-in-hand with roommate and vice delivery girl Sam Ronson over the weekend. Sporting her character's fake baby bump (required for the film's stolen-directly-from-Baby Mama-plot "twist") and smiling from ear to ear, the couple continued the PDA parade they started in Cannes last month. And according to the Daily Mail, Lohan's friends say she and Ronson are "both really happy." More confusing though, is their assurance that Lindsay feels "safe" around the DJ. We still automatically envision Lohan's sleepytime cokepants adventure whenever we see the two together, not to mention tear-soaked catfights in clubs, and painful bedroom injuries. But considering Lindsay's fetish for self-abuse, we suppose her Joshua Kelley-esque penchant for pain is all part of the fun.

[Photo credits: X17]

• LINDSAY LOHAN STROLLS HAND IN HAND WITH HER LESBIAN LOVER AS FRIENDS SAY SHE'S FINALLY HAPPY [Daily Mail]

“Which starlet with an often-troubled boyfriend actually plays for the other team — and puts up with her boy toy's habits to maintain hetero appearances?”

While many Young Hollywood players are currently afflicted with that equally trendy need to date cads, only a few from the club cross our mind as potential lady lovers. Our guesses after the jump.

Anne Hathaway:
As much as we adore Anne, we've been notably confused lately as to why the scandal-free actress has spent so many years standing by her man, real estate investor/lawsuit-magnet Raffaello Follieri, even after his money-grubbing headlines repeatedly coincide with her movie release dates.

Heidi Montag:
Is Heidi really a starlet? Debatable, but what isn't? The fact that no one is more concerned with keeping up "appearances" than the Hills deviant and her "habits"-plagued boyfriend Spencer Pratt. Plus, that whole Grieving Over Lauren's Friendship story line that's continued through two seasons only makes sense when you add lesbian undertones to it.

Jennifer Aniston:
Aniston's never made her pro-lesbian outlook a secret, and we've been wondering why the well-toned wonder would be swimming in the cad pool ever since first catching sight of her fembot nipples inches away from John Mayer's O Face. Though "starlet" hardly does the A-lister justice.

Your turn to add up the elements and guess away!

• FULL DISCLOSURE [NYDN]

As Janet Charlton reports, Gay Pride weekend had such a buoying effect on Keener that the actress stepped out in public not one, not two, but three times with rumored new lady love Jackie Warner of Bravo's Work Out. According to sources, they were seen "passionately making out" on a sidewalk and held hands in two different clubs. Now don't get us wrong — we've spent many a Sunday eyes glued to the television during a marathon as Jackie and her impossibly gorgeous minions sweat their way from beach to hot tub to gym in their skivvies. But every time the "power lesbian" gets just the teensiest bit upset with one of her trainer slaves, she seems capable of crushing their beautiful heads to a pulp using a simple inner-thigh squeeze. Which, now that we think about it, may be a prime reason that this relationship appears to be blossoming.

[Photo credits: Getty]

• JACKIE WARNER AND 'THE L WORD''S ELIZABETH KEENER HOT FOR EACH OTHER [Janet Charlton]