The year-end tally features Fireproof — which stars Cameron as a firefighter attempting to salvage his marriage via God's precious love (spoiler: it works!) — atop an impressive pile of awards hopefuls including Slumdog Millionaire, Milk, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Rachel Getting Married and even The Visitor, whose renown as this year's preeminent indie sensation nevertheless was good for only $9.4 million since opening last April. Fireproof accrued more than three times as much since the end of September, never expanding beyond 905 screens.

Slumdog will surpass Fireproof as it expands next year, likely en route to $55 million as it lines up its imminent Oscar nods. But until then, spread the news among jittery insiders looking for a safe place to drop their money: Kirk Cameron is a recession-proof industry. Eat your heart out, Hayden Christensen.

• 'Fireproof,' Indeed: Kirk Cameron Tops 2008 Specialty Box Office [IW]

1. Eagle Eye - $29.2 million

This opening —the biggest since The Dark Knight juggernaut took off in July— officially marks Shia LaBeouf's entrance into the elite (and diminishing) club of actors who can actually open a movie. Just goes to prove that if you pay your greenscreen dues by battling nefarious CGI robots and swinging on digital vines (not to mention befriending Steven Spielberg), you too can become a major motion picture star!

2. Nights In Rodanthe - $13.6 million

The latest, thoroughly formulaic film from the canon of literary lightweight Nicholas Sparks was a big hit with the older female quadrant. If house porn is your thing, you could do a lot worse.

4. Fireproof - $6.5 million

Kirk Cameron is back, baby! We can only hope that his agents strike while the B.O. iron is hot and sign him up for a project that reunites him, Boner Stabone and Eddie Zeff in a Superbad meets The Big Chill type of caper, perhaps one in which they could track down the present whereabouts of hotties from ABC's late '80s lineup like Jamie Luner, Khrystyne Haje and Tracy Wells.

9. Miracle At St. Anna - $3.5 million

Despite getting a push from Oprah Winfrey last week, it looks like Spike Lee's latest will have a struggle to top Letters From Iwo Jima's $13.7MM domestic gross. Score one for Clint.

14. Choke - $1.3 million

Opening in limited release (just 435 theaters), the latest Chuck Pahlaniuk adaptation fared admirably with a $3,069 per screen average. That said, we have our doubts as to whether Middle America is ready to embrace a film whose climax involves the passing of lost anal beads.

• Weekend Box Office Results for September 26–28, 2008 [Box Office Mojo]

WHAT'S NEW: Shia LaBeouf reunites with his Disturbia director DJ Caruso for the thriller Eagle Eye, featuring our young hero as a man trapped (alongside Michelle Monaghan) in a mysterious mire of surveillance, espionage and murder also featuring Billy Bob Thornton and Rosario Dawson. Hitchcock comes up in more discussions of the film than he doesn't, with the rap being that Eagle Eye represents North by Northwest to Disturbia's too-influential-for-comfort Rear Window, but that's just adults being adults. The kids will toss rose petals and dump around $30.6 million out their wallets, further anchoring LaBeouf as his generation's most bankable star without a driver's license. Congrats, Shia!

Meanwhile, that generation's parents can shuffle into the auditorium next door for the Gere/Lane reteaming Nights in Rodanthe, adapted from a Hallmark card novel by Nicholas Sparks with enough inoffesnsively creaky cliche and Mom Jeans-wetting romance to attract around $13.1 million.

Also opening in limited release: The Palahniuk adaptation Choke; the Charlize Theron-led propaganda ensemble Battle in Seattle; Tim Robbins' and Rachel McAdams' Iraq-themed The Lucky Ones; Wayne Wang's modest immigrant mish-mash A Thousand Years of Good Prayers; the misanthropic Easter bunny comedy Hank and Mike; the race-baiting terrorism saga Shoot on Sight (tagline: "Is it a crime to be a Muslim?"); the Filipina-tranny doc The Amazing Truth About Queen Raquela; and the lyrical, Indie Spirit Award-winning drama August Evening.

THE BIG LOSER: It's not like we actively root against films around Defamer HQ (all right, maybe that one time; it had it coming), and we really would like to see Spike Lee pull off Miracle at St. Anna, his epic WWII semi-mystery focusing long-overdue attention on the Army's 92nd Infantry Division — the only all-black unit to see combat in Europe. He may yet do it with Disney's micro-marketing prowess, but let's be honest: The reviews are brutal, it's 160 minutes long, it's rated R, it rotates between English, German and Italian, and at least a quarter of its intended audience is likelier to defer to one of two sturdy holdovers — Burn After Reading or The Famliy That Preys. If this breaks $5.5 million, we'll be shocked. Sorry, Spike; there's always Inside Man 2.

THE UNDERDOG: We alluded to it earlier this week, but Kirk Cameron's Fireproof — with its born-again title, God-fearing creds and bankable-enough star among Christian audiences — should sneak up on the mainstream, possibly pulling in as much as $4.2 million on 800 screens. Those are Dane Cook-beating numbers, and Lord knows a good Dane Cook beating is something to behold.

FOR SHUT-INS: New DVD's this week include Sex and the City, Leatherheads, the underrated Simon Pegg comedy Run, Fat Boy, Run, Dario Argento's gore opus Mother of Tears and, at long last, Two and a Half Men: The Complete Fourth Season.

So are you planning to drive Shia to the theater, or is it more of an old-people-fucking kind of weekend for you? Are we giving Spike a fair shake? And what to do about this glut at the art house? Call your shots!

You guessed it: Fireproof is another of Cameron's religious-themed movies, and thanks to bulk purchases by church groups, it seems likely to rake in the big bucks this weekend and beyond. So what will these crowds be treated to? How about Kirk Cameron as a heroic fireman who’s having problems with his wife? But instead of taking the heathen’s way out and getting a divorce, he looks to God to teach him how to be a better husband. Sounds thrilling to be sure, but don’t go expecting another Passion of the Christ here; Jesus on the cross can outdraw Kirk on the ladder any day. But still, you godless A-listers better watch your back: Cameron is coming for you, and he’s got the Lord on his side. Amen.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

• Group ticket sales could ignite 'Fireproof' [LA Times]

There is no point fighting it anymore. Vh1 will continue to produce shows featuring has-been stars from our youth and, like moths to the TV screen, we'll watch them cry, urinate on themselves and make out in hot tubs until the end of time. Their newest idea will feature (shocker!) Vh1 reality vet Scott Baio mentoring eight “male teen idols” of the 80s in an effort to jump-start a comeback. Since the sad little group has yet to be revealed, we went ahead and picked two former crushworthy picks we’d most like to see week after week, and the two who might force us to cancel our cable package altogether:

Squeal-Worthy:
Kirk Cameron: Yes, he's some kind of born-again family man whose intense dedication to JC scares us more than a little, but with former womanizer Scott at the helm, we think he could convert back to ladies' man after seeing a stripper for the first time in ten (fifteen? twenty?) years.
Fred Savage: We will never, ever get over our crush on Kevin from The Wonder Years. We don't care what he's turned into, but those dimples will always make us weak in the knees.

Do Not Want:
George Michael: While it might be interesting to mix in an openly gay star into the mix of what's sure to be a heterofest, the last thing anyone needs is to see is George and Scott Baio in a painful re-enactment of the former's bathroom misadventures.
Ricky Schroeder: Kid is doing just fine. With guest spots on 24 and Scrubs under his belt, we don't think he's as desperate as the rest. Plus he already came back on NYPD Blue and had his chance. Aside from all that, he never quite made our heart "throb" in the first place.

• SCOTT BAIO TO EXEC PRODUCE VH1 REALITY SERIES FEATURING FORMER MALE TEEN IDOLS

If Kirk Cameron ever worried about being the child actor that time forgot, he needn't have: Thanks to those Internets the kids are raving about, Kirk will live in our hearts forever through parodies — here, The Bourne Again Ultimatum — that remind us forever what a nutjob he became. Oh, but if anyone finds his missing rapture ticket, please return it. That thing's non-refundable.

• The Bourne Again Ultimatum trailer [iKlipz.com]