Gawker: defamer, kieferwatch

What's Kiefer Eating In Jail?

Seth — Fri, 07 Dec 2007 13:20:10 EST

As a parked RV full of vigil-standing Defamer commenters idles outside of the Glendale City Jail, Kiefer Sutherland sits in his solitary cell just a few hundred feet away, beginning Day 3 of what will eventually be 48 days in the correctional facility. His only crimes? An illegal U-turn and perhaps loving life too much. Still, a repentant and cooperative actor appears to have accepted his fate, with one jail spokesman going so far as to describe him as a "model prisoner":

"He's not happy to be here," Officer John Balian says, "but you can tell from his demeanor that he's sorry and takes responsibility for what's he's done."

Sutherland spent his first full day on Thursday folding jail laundry. He also had cornflakes for breakfast, a turkey sandwich for lunch and chicken a la king for dinner.
The 24 actor, who is housed alone in a cell, has also been assigned to serve meals to the other eight to 10 inmates, one of whom was recently arrested for attempted murder - on four people. [...]

The only interaction Sutherland will have with other inmates is when he slides a tray of food through slots in their cell doors.

He also has shower access twice a day.

As of Thursday evening, Sutherland had not had any visitors. However, Balian says that the actor brought several books to keep him busy.

While Sutherland appears to be adjusting well, we'd caution his fans that he might well emerge from this month-and-a-half-long ordeal a changed man, looking not unlike his hirsute, scarred alter ego after two years in a Chinese political prison. So while it will be a relief to know he again walks among us, expect none of the jubilance of, say, Paris Hilton's own liberation day, as we're having trouble envisioning Jack Bauer coquettishly strutting down a jail-release red carpet with a half-cocked smile, flashbulbs popping as he suddenly makes an overjoyed dash towards an awaiting SUV and into the arms of his loving father, Donald.

Kiefer Sutherland a 'Model Prisoner' [People]

We're one step closer to the end of the waking...

Mark — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 19:12:00 EDT

We're one step closer to the end of the waking nightmare represented by Kiefer Sutherland's ongoing DUI case, as his Hollywood superlawyer has entered a no contest plea on the actor's behalf. Now we have to wait until December 21st for the sentencing, hoping that he receives the wrist-slap that will allow him to get back to the important business of being The World's Drinking Buddy™ as quickly as possible. [TMZ]

A Kiefer-In-Peril Round-Up

Seth — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 12:45:43 EDT

When Kiefer Sutherland wandered out of his East Side comfort zone—where drunken U-turns aren't just legal, they're encouraged!—and into the glare of a West L.A. cop car's spotlight, few of us immediately realized that the ensuing arrest constituted a probation violation for the beloved, tannenbaum-tackling lush-of-the-people. Now, with the actor facing possible jail time and all the ominous God-finding that implies, we offer a Kiefer post-DUI round-up:

· Kiefer's night in lockdown had no immediate effect on 24's shooting schedule, though there's no telling what extended jail time might do to affect the season, or President Cherry Jones's ability to fend off a nuclear threat posed by lesbian-denying Iranian terrorists. [THR]

· Jack "Lauded" Bauer wasn't going to allow one little DUI prevent him from accepting another honor from a grateful nation: This time, the nation was Canada, and the honor was an ACTRA award for commitment to his northern homeland and their native acting peoples. [Variety]
· Unfortunately, as of posting time, Canada's national newspaper doesn't know how to spell their own favorite son's name. [theglobeandmail.com]
· A Canadian journalist breaks down his first post-arrest day like an episode of 24. We're glad you find this so hilarious, Kiefer's supposedly appreciative country! [thestar.com]
· More Commonwealth Kiefer Coverage fun-facts: In England, it's called "drink-driving," and yes, that does sound weird, but no weirder than a "drugs overdose." [news.bbc.co.uk]
· Here's a shocking video of Kiefer signing autographs outside Area the night of the arrest. We know! We can hardly believe it, either! [TMZ]