Gawker: defamer, kids choice awards

Nickelodeon Declares Chris Brown Unfit for Kids to Choose

Richard Lawson — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 13:51:00 EDT

Nickelodeon has finally read the internet. A week too late. They sent an urgent memo out today, recognizing their dumb mistake in keeping girlfriend-beater Chris Brown among the nominees for their Kids' Choice Awards.

An anonymous employee at the kiddie network told us that they received the following email this afternoon, in which an emergency is declared and a strict timetable for when all Brown-related Kids Choice Awards material needs to be off the website. The timetable is: IMMEDIATELY! 'Cause, you know, the stuff's been up there for weeks now, and it's probably about time old programmer Gus shuffled in with his mop and bucket and cleaned up this mess. Curious, considering they were all set to stand by him just yesterday. Maybe this is a hoax memo?

Subject: KCA EMERGENCY!

All,
We have to remove Chris Brown from Voting, Nominees & any other content (Flipbooks, Video, UPick)
The plan is to remove CB from Fav Male Singer & Fav Song in Voting as well as Nominees.
[blank] is reformatting the Voting page now. [blank] is working on the Voting backend.
Here are the lists of tasks & responsibilities

Voting:
Reformat Voting by 2m
Voting edit by 3pm

Nominees:
3pm
4pm

Other content:
Video:
Flipbooks:
UPD:
All Site inits:
Message Boards:
SEO:

Producers: Please scan the site & call out any mention of Chris Brown anywhere.

Please report back with your progress.

And, you know, if this email is bogus, we'll know soon enough. What was it, 4pm?

Update: Brown's name and face have, in fact, been deleted from the offending pages.

Will Chris Brown Win the Kids' Choice Award??

Richard Lawson — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 13:05:48 EST

The girlfriend-assaulting R&B singer is nominated for a Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Award! We think he's a longshot at this point, but you never know... There are always surprises at the KCAs!

As my distinguished colleague Alex Pareene said, "Someone should probably forward Nickelodeon a copy of the internet."

Um, agreed.

Harrison Ford Disappointed To Learn Slime Contains No Alcohol

Seth — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 13:30:05 EDT

Arguably the last Hollywood reach-around that still truly matters, it's hardly a surprise to see some of the world's biggest stars line up for their turn to get slimed at the Nickelodeon's Kids Choice Awards—a relatively minor price to pay to ingratiate yourself to a new generation of prepubescent fans, who'll come away viewing you not just as some relic steeped in old-man smell, but as certified lunchbox-adornment material.

In Saturday night's live broadcast, Harrison Ford (who, in deference to his surroundings, had only Sunny D swishing around the ice-filled highball glass he totes around to all awards ceremonies) recreated perhaps one of the most iconic sequences in modern cinematic history: The Raiders of the Lost Ark idol/sandbag switch-off. It was a clever bit of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull promotion, particularly in the moments immediately after Ford stole a taste of the non-toxic green goop that covered him, as the oldest man in the room was then made to outrun a rolling 500 ton gobstopper while avoiding a swarm of deadly Pixy Stix blowdarts launched at him from the kids-only crowd.

Kids Choice Awards