New York Magazine this morning heard from Bacon's publicist, who confirmed that the actor and his wife had money invested in Madoff's bogus funds that imploded with his arrest earlier this month. The rep would not elaborate on the nature or severity of the losses, instead advising reporters and readers alike to "not speculate or rely on hearsay."

Fair enough. Devastating as the news is, can we at least posit the silver lining of future work that may replenish their coffers? Stunt-casting roles for Bacon, perhaps, as the crusading preacher in Zac Efron's Footloose remake or a doomed camp counselor in the Friday the 13th revival? Sedgwick-starring spinoffs featuring her characters from Singles and Something to Talk About? A sequel to their 2006 collaboration Loverboy? All right, not that. Ideas?

• Madoff’s Latest Victims: Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick [NYM]

Efron could pull in mid-seven figures for Footloose — by far his biggest payday to date — in addition to script approval for the story of Ren McCormack, a surly city kid whose relocation to a Midwest hellhole where dancing is banned ignites a particularly well-choreographed civil-disobedience streak. Dirty Dancing's Kenny Ortega is attached to direct while Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist director Peter Sollett is polishing the screenplay.

All of which are secondary details, we know, to the burning questions of what will survive from Bacon's star-making original. The soundtrack will reportedly retain hits including "Let's Hear it for the Boy" and "Holding Out For a Hero," but more importantly, what arrhythmic schlub will replace the late Chris Penn in the first song's requisite dance-instruction montage? And does Efron have the brooding edge to own the latter tune's cutthroat, tractor-centric game of chicken? The End of Ideas jury is still out on this one, but if Efron vetoes the bleacher make-out session to "Almost Paradise," expect trouble. The guy has to get to second base eventually.

• Paramount Fast-Tracks 'Footloose' [Variety]

The latest installment also includes Kate Winslet, Denzel Washington, Shenae Grimes, James Cromwell, Kevin Bacon, Kyra Sedgwick, Whitney Port, Anton Yelchin, T.R. Knight and more.

WEDNESDAY, SEPT. 17

I spotted RYAN GOSLING at the Hotel Cafe last week catching a show by singer AUDRA MAE. He was with a bunch of scruffy dudes - sans Rachel McAdams! Ladies, there may still be hope for us all. He looked super thin and was rocking some stubble. Stayed and hung out after the show until some drunk chick vomited all over the bar, at which point he promptly beelined for the door.

THURSDAY, SEPT. 18

Just returned from the new Big Wang's in West Hollywood where KEVIN FEDERLINE was holding court around the pool table. The group that he was with was way too exited to be in a NoHo bar with KFed. Lots of hooting and cheering every time he made a shot.

FRIDAY, SEPT. 19

Saw super talented and delicious HGTV's Next Design Star runner-up MATT LOCKE at the Sound of Music sing-along. Insert joke about hammering hard wood here. Snicker snicker.

I'm walking up Flower street in Downtown LA around noon today walking towards The Standard when all of a sudden TIM GUNN walks out. He looks great, if not incognito. In hindsight I should have asked him to say "holla at ya boy."

Right now. A very blond KATE WINSLET in first-class on AA 180 from LAX to JFK.

SATURDAY, SEPT. 20

I spotted the USS Enterprise crew member ANTON YELCHIN in Van Nuys on Saturday night at a party at Beer City Studios. He was supporting a friend's band on harmonica and guitar. Much later in the evening, he serenaded the remaining party goers with an 8-minute, improvisational story song about his experience with a "MILF."

Also spotted at the party that night was SAM GOLZARI from American Dreamz and 21. He was playing with his band at the party and, needless to say, we were all "Omerized."

While eating excellent pizza at Tomato Pie on Melrose, SHENAE GRIMES from 90210 walked past me twice. Petite, cute and NOT ANOREXIC!!!! no matter what the tabloids or the L.A. Times claim. Five minutes later, same place, spotted JAMES CROMWELL with his wife/girlfriend and an unexpected big smile on his face.

The MTV Awards may be just a memory now, but on Saturday I actually saw JESSE CAMP, live and in person outside of Cheetah’s. He was accompanied by his wife, and looks pretty much exactly the same as when he won that contest years ago.

SUNDAY, SEPT. 21

On Griffith Park Blvd. at the intersection with Los Feliz Blvd. Was waiting for the traffic lights to change, and just glanced in the rear view to check my hotness, and who do I see pulled up to my bumper, baby? None other than delish-o-gay, T.R. KNIGHT. Was at the wheel of his champagne, metallic SUV (not too big). I knew he lived nearby and it was only a matter of time... Was using his cellphone as he drove. Bad man. Needs bottom spanked. Matter of time...

At the Aero Theater for a sneak peek of Choke - LAURA INNES (redhead doc from ER) sat just across the aisle from me — she laughed in all good spots, stayed for the Q&A with director CLARK GREGG, looked nice and normal and had no attitude (unlike some other people who flipped their lids over the no-camera rule); also JON FAVREAU was there to support Gregg — someone asked a question about Iron Man 2 and they had a laugh, Favs hung out for a bit and talked to all sorts of fans who were surprised to see him, another no-attitude celeb.

MONDAY, SEPT. 22

At BLT Steak: WHITNEY PORT and five others sat at the table next to us, which was fine, she's pretty and all and her manager or whatever wasn't too annoying. But, as we were walking out I noticed DENZEL WASHINGTON sitting in a corner. I feel like he smiled at me when I smiled at him. He is way sexy.

Spotted KEVIN BACON and KYRA SEDGWICK in the parking lot at the southwest corner of Ventura and Beverly Glen in Sherman Oaks at noon today. They were walking to their light blue Prius and looked young, cute, and fit. Seriously. At first I thought it couldn't be them, because who is that cute young blonde ponytailed girl? But sure enough, it was Kyra (no mistaking that face). At one point Kevin put his arm around her and they kissed. Genuinely looked like the real deal.

With promises of beer and babes, I headed to the Bergamot Station Arts Colony, a 16,000 square foot facility where the Writer's Boot Camp is located. Founded by Jeffrey Gordon, Writer's Boot Camp, besides drilling in the basics of Structure and Exciting Incidents into the minds of many aspiring screenwriters, also hosts parties. This one delivered on its promise to bring together members of the cast and crew, including Landis himself, to a panel discussion. Also: did you know that it's possible to talk about Animal House for TWO HOURS?

Making my way through the gargantuan Colony, I stopped and took a picture of a "Junker Garden," an art project by Farmlab. A Mercedes filled with dirt and plants. Très cool.


Once safely inside the Bootcamp, I was greeted by yes, you guessed it, Hot Chicks in Togas.

One of them was a friend-of-a-friend, Dana Schoenfeld (blondie on the left), who is also does marketing and events for Bootcamp, and is also a recent New York escapee.

As this was billed as a "Class Reunion," no details were spared. We were reminded that it was Rush Week with several well-placed signs and props. Hurrah!

The evening started with a screening at 5 p.m.. Thinking that most people would wait to show up for the panel discussions later on, I was shocked to see a full house of 40-something people dutifully chuckling along in the Bootcamp's screening room. The movie seems almost quaint in some ways—they have that way of talking with clear diction and sharp accents that reminds me of old movies from the '50s and '60s; I also didn't know that Kevin Bacon or Donald Sutherland were in it.

Afterwards, everyone ran to grab some grub at one of the bountiful tables of food.

In a side room, Animal House's writer Chris Miller read from his memoir, The Real Animal House, about his actual fraternity, which the movie was based.

Then we all filed back into the main room for a two-hour panel discussion between the cast and crew, including John Landis, Smith, and Stephen Bishop (aka, "charming guy with guitar"), Stephen Furst ("Flounder"), with Gordon moderating.

Robert Morgan Fisher—who organized the whole event—insisted that he sing the song in the movie from the famous scene where Belushi smashes the guitar all the way to the end.

Of course, it was not to be.

This guy (I would described him as a dead ringer, but um, oh, ah, too late) showed up.

After lengthy, wordy (well, they are writers) but engaging, intros, they commenced with dispensing nuggets of not-previously disclosed information and amusing anecdotes.

For instance, did you know that Chris Miller was behind the "Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs" campaign? Now, you do.

Did you know that it's one of the 300 films in the National Film Registry in the Library of Congress?

The horse, apparently, was the highest paid performer in the movie.

Because the studio was so nervous about the movie, they screened it for Richard Pryor. After viewing it he called up and said, "It's fucking funny. You white people are crazy."

The studio wanted Chevy Chase to star, and pushed for Dom DeLuise and Dan Aykroyd. Without a star, Landis was told he wouldn't get a greenlight. An old friend, Donald Sutherland, came to the rescue. "I called him up and said you have to do me a favor," recalled the director.

Martha Smith who played Babs, displayed a dry wit.

She said: "I'm looking forward to the 50 year reunion," she paused. "Animal Home."

And, in case you were wondering, she still looks damn hot.

It seems that they had as much fun making the film as it looks.

Chris Miller: "When the first movie you write is Animal House, you get a skewed idea and think, 'Wow, this is going to be easy.'"

And he answered Gordon's semi-serious question about the collaboration methods of writing the script, thus: "The collaboration involved a lot of marijuana."

As Landis was a new director at the time, Animal House was also not Priority Number One. "They took away my crane to work on the Incredible Hulk TV series," he remembered.

Though he said the Animal House script was the "single funniest thing I ever read," Landis instructed the writers to rewrite by posing the two Frat factions as good guys and bad guys, or, "sympathetic and unsympathetic."

As a Hollywood sacrificial virgin, I have no idea if by industry standards John Landis has a crazy reputation as a dark lord, but during the panel, he seemed like a really awesome, down-to-earth, supremely funny, no bullshit, I-wanna-get-drinks-with-him, kind of guy.

I especially liked it when he ripped on some cliched screenwriting tropes. "Structure," he paused and looked up. "When someone says, 'the Arc of a Character,' in a conversation, I immediately think, 'This guy doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about." Nervous giggles, there. (Later, a pretty British teacher at the school stood up and defended character arc, and said, "I disagree with you. I can't believe I just said that."

Though he had earlier called the Animal House script, "a really smart and literate screenplay," he told a seemingly shell-shocked audience of aspiring writers, "Screenwriting is not literature."

(Cue: air getting sucked out of room.)

And he imparted this bit of wisdom: "It's not about the idea. It's ONLY about the execution."

At the end, a woman in the audience asked not so eloquently how we could go back to that feel-good era and do something like Animal House again. Landis extrapolated and explained that a mid-level, indie-like movie isn't possible anymore, in days when it takes $30 million just to open a picture. "I used to be able to look at my studios and say, 'Whose company is that?' There's not one major today that's not a small subdivision of a large company."

But, the night's most important revelation was not so serious. At one point the director smiled and looked at his old friends: "Wow. We're all one degree from Kevin Bacon."

Snyder was caught when authorities audited who was accessing personal and tax information stored on a federal database called the Integrated Data Retrieval Systems, according to the affidavit.

Authorities said Snyder had access to the database, but works almost exclusively with business accounts and had no legitimate reason to review individual taxpayer accounts. ... Snyder, 56, faces up to a year in prison and a $250,000 fine at this time if found guilty of improperly accessing IRS data, a misdemeanor.

Come on, now — if learning the closely guarded truth about how much Vanna makes to laugh at Pat Sajak's jokes and stroke huge letters for a few hours a week doesn't constitute a "legitimate reason" to bump around a tax database, we don't know what does.

[Photo Credit: AFP]

• Did IRS worker snoop? [Cincinnati Enquirer via TaxProf]

Back in 1994 when Bruce Willis was still with Demi and still managed to maintain that sexy tough guy image, he revealed the full monty in Color Of Night. And the industry's most dedicated fan of showing off his package, Ewan McGregor, memorably lounged naked throughout several scenes in Young Adam. And we all remember the time from a chiseled Kevin Bacon subtly proved to the world how lucky Kyra Sedgwick is via steamy shower scene in Wild Things.

Before Ewan McGregor, Harvey Keitel was Hollywood's go-to full-frontal actor, stripping down for both Bad Lieutenant and The Piano. But our all-time favorite appearance by a male actor's schlong has to go to Mark Wahlberg in Boogie Nights. Yes, it was a hefty prosthetic, and no, we don't learn just how much junk Marky Mark is packing, but the highly anticipated revelation of Dirk Diggler's legendary package was worth waiting two porn-y hours for back in 1997.

[Photo credits: Entertainment Weekly, Celebritycandids.com, nudemalestars.com, Maxim, malecelebrities.biz]

• 'FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL' LETS IT ALL HANG OUT [LAT]

In today's episode: Sylvester Stallone; Al Pacino; Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, and Rupert Everett; Kevin Bacon; Scarlett Johansson; Alicia Keys, and Rumer Willis; Jennifer Garner; Ellen DeGeneres and Portia Di Rossi; Shia LaBeouf; Timothy Dalton; David Hasselhoff; TR Knight; Ed Begley Jr.; BJ Novak; Joey McIntyre; Brody Jenner; Lance Bass and Sally Struthers.

· On Saturday night, 5-12, on Canon in Beverly Hills, Sylvester Stallone in a light blue sweater and serious mullet, walking like a musclebound zombie with wife and daughters(?). Has reached a point where he seems like a parody of himself.

· Just got back from an early Mother's Day dinner at Madeo that $$$ Italian Restaurant on Beverly. And as we sat there a guy with fluffed up brown hair comes towards me. I just stared thinking, is that Al Pacino? He looked sort of puffy and smooth and I always thought he was kind of craggy. But it was! I just stared wide eyed, impressed but not really since I never really liked him anyway. But it was a bit of a thrill. He sat at the bar with a bald guy. And my mom moved the wine bottles so she could see him. Then as we left I think I saw Brody Jenner. I don't know who he is but he looked/acted rich/famous. Later that night (after the Al Pacino sighting), I got dragged to Here and the Abbey. As we left at 2 am my friend said you just missed the In Sync guy. I said who? He said Lance Bass. We went next door to the Abbey for coffee and I missed him again. But my friend saw him in both places. I saw the back of his head.

· Friday May 4th:

Quadruple sighting at The Tower Bar:

So I'm walking into the Tower Bar for dinner and from around the corner I hear a familiar, soothing, sexy voice. I glance to the right to see Rupert Everett and probably his older gay lover having drinks in the restaurant entrance. Wow is he handsome in person.

Does it count if you saw a semi-recognizable band? I mean, I KNOW them from somewhere....The Shins I think....whoever they were they were smokin' hot.

Last but not least, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Jerk's walked in like they owned the place. Call me crazy but isn't she some has been who hasn't been in anything for a long time? The only thing that she's famous for lately is robbing the cradle with Kelso. The looked like they were fresh in from doing whatever they do at Kabbalah on a Friday night. He was dressed in all white like Mr. Clean and she was going to a funeral in all black. That is all to report....

· Sunday 5/13, sometime between 6-7pm
Saw Kevin Bacon shopping at the Pavillions on Montana & Lincoln. He looked GOOD, wearing a sweet rocker-style leather jacket. This might be my favorite celeb sighting to date...as it was KEVINFREKIN BACON!!! My parents were in town and my dad was with me, although he doesn't get excited about much. My mom was pretty ticked off that she stayed home though.

· On Friday night at Hyde I was with a few friends and though the club was by no means crowded, among the partygoers were:

A overly done up Scarlett Johansson with fiery red lipstick and a floral print blouse that did absolutely nothing for her cleavage or side-boob (isn't she known for that)? She was with a group of three girls who acted as a phalanx around her, all of whom were LA 6's (if Scarlett is an LA 9).

An incognito Alicia Keys. Wearing a hat; I couldn't even really get a good look at her.

A short haired but very pretty Rumer Willis who, if IMDB is correct, isn't even 19 yet. She must have a great fake ID.

· Jennifer Garner and child, in the front window of the Kitchen Academy at the Arclight on Friday afternoon.

· Sunday Evening, Mother's Day: Ellen DeGeneres and Portia Di Rossi having a quiet dinner alone at an inside corner table at Pace in Laurel Canyon. They looked very much in love with each other.

· I saw Shia LaBeouf at the party at the Wilton Hilton last Saturday (5/5). Kid was rockin' the cheesy slicked-back hair he's been sporting recently, and I think he was wearing a Designs By Thomas T-shirt. It was pretty obvious he was looking to score, but I didn't see if he left with anyone because I was too distracted by the free-flowing tequila.

· Just saw none other than the Hoff at Easton Gym. No, not trying to work off the belly that made his most recent video debut that much more pathetic. He was standing on the balcony yakking on his cellphone. I shared my sighting with the register girl at Victoria's Secret, who said, "I saw him at the grocery store once. None of the younger girls knew who he was. But the older chicks were all trippin'."

Bitch.

· 5/12 Arriving for a Saturday workout at Santa Monica's decidedly unhip Easton Gym, a tall gent faintly resembling David Hasselhoff breezed by me in the small and empty locker room. Pulling up to the lockers, he set his gym bag down and declared in self-pep talk mode, "Alright, let's go!" to no one in particular. Had it been at the West Hollywood branch, such locker room banter could easily have been taken as an invitation for a steam room romp. Nonetheless, it was tough to determine if this was in fact Hasselhoff hiding behind a pair of blatantly European sunglasses that screamed, "look what I picked up in Germany while launching Baywatch: A Hawaiian Wedding." Moving to the stairmasters, gym on-lookers stared, aghast not at the atrophied arms nor because an appearance at Easton was the ultimate sign that his divorce proceedings had hit rock bottom. And no, they were not stunned to see the same man they had just seen on YouTube sucking in his abs while blabbering drunkedly on a Las Vegas hotel room floor. No, they simply appeared unsure that the man whose auburn hair looked like it's been dyed one too many times was in fact Hasselhoff. However, the international recording artist quickly confirmed his presence by breaking out his Motorola Razr and spending most of his workout yammering away to no one of particular interest, including when he moved to the ab mat area where he showed off his clunky early-90s K-Swiss and stretched-tight tube socks look.

· Timothy Dalton (!) coming out of the Cinerama Dome on Sunday after the 1:50 showing of Spiderman 3. He was with a boy of about 10, presumably his son, and looked pretty darn good for 63 (according to IMDB). After taking a look at the line for the parking self-pay machine, he opted to skip it and head for his car. (He made the right choice, too — that stupid machine was possessed.)

· I saw unabashed closet refugee TR Knight at the West Hollywood whole foods on friday afternoon. I heart TR, and TR hearts carbohydrates (he was buying enough cereal to last him through a nuclear winter). Doing something strange with his hair, though. It was a krazy ketchup red. Maybe he and Katherine Heigl have sleepovers where they listen to Ace of Base, play "do dump or marry" and dye their hair with Kool-Aid.

· I saw Ed Begley Jr. eating at Malo on Sunset in Silverlake Saturday night at about 10PM with a few other people. Even sitting down, he looked like he belongs in the NBA.

· Saw Ryan the Temp from The Office (BJ Novak, thanks IMDB) sitting on the patio at Birds last Tuesday (May 8th). He was with two beautiful girls, which I don't understand because he looks like a troll.

Also saw New Kid on the Block Joey McIntyre in baby blue strutting confidently down Larchmont on Sunday just after seven. He was strutting so confidently that it almost took away from the fact that he appeared to be talking to himself. He went into the Rite-Aid or CVS or whatever that is, and I didn't follow him.

· In the middle of the mind numbing crush of humanity that is Ikea in Burbank on a Saturday afternoon (May 12) I spotted Sally Struthers pushing a full cart down the self-service warehouse aisle. She looked bewildered and angry at her decision to enter the madness, but so did I & most everyone else.

At issue, according to ThinkFilm, was the mystery's pivotal scene, which involves a menage a trois among Kevin Bacon, Colin Firth and [Rachel] Blanchard, which leads to a young woman's death. According to Egoyan, the shot was filmed as a single sustained master shot and he couldn't cut it any further without rendering the mystery incomprehensible.

We're so happy they stuck to their naughty guns; no one wants to watch an incomprehensibly edited three-way. It would be a shame if the tantalizing mysteries (Hey, where did Kevin Bacon's hand go? Is he giving Firth a reacharound? Whose leg is that on Blanchard's shoulder?) raised by an artistically shot gang-bang scene were destroyed in an editing bay.

• 'Truth' hurts for Canadian director [THR/Reuters]

[Bacon's role as a "fey" hair stylist in Beauty Shop was] such a relief from the fearsome five weeks of shooting The Woodsman. When you're playing a pedophile, there are no good days on the set, no breezy romantic scenes, no goofy ad-libbing.

We're guessing that hilarious improv of Bacon as Michael Jackson and co-star Benjamin Bratt as Roman Polanski isn't going to make the DVD extras.

• Sum of his parts [LAT Calendarlive, sub. req'd.]