Though Jack Nicholson and Dennis Hopper may have dropped LSD together and smoked a reported 155 joints in a row for just one Easy Rider scene, pictures of the legends puffing on cigars still pop up on the internets to this day. Along with Keith Richards, who continued to prove his immortality by walking this year's Shine A Light red carpet in NY with an ever-present cigarette, Hollywood's most infamous chimneys have been replaced by even heavier habit-afflicted youngsters. Mary-Kate Olsen is so addicted to her Marlboro Reds that she regularly lights up in gala bathrooms, while Shia LaBeouf recently set off security alarms at the Smithsonian in between shooting scenes for Transformers 2 because the bitch-slapper lit up in the john. And we're all well aware that chain-smoker Sam Ronson appears to have gotten lesbionic BFF Lindsay Lohan hooked — though all the straight edge forces within not-so-straight bestie T.R. Knight still haven't done much to come between Heigl and her American Spirits. Which is actually fine with us — the "throatier" her laugh, the weaker her chances of becoming the next Julia Roberts become!

[Photo credits: Wireimage, That Computer Guy, Skinny Celebrities, Extra TV, Just Jared]

• JACK BLACK KICKS HE NICOTINE HABIT [Snarkerati]

We thought of asking Richards to nudge silent, somnambulent drummer Charlie Watts awake for a quick picture, but opted instead to inquire about Scorsese's own cameos in the beginning and end of the film — the latest contributions to an increasingly public persona we've seen him develop everywhere from TV spots to causes célèbres including the environment and film preservation. Sure, there are more famous directors, but we can't imagine Steven Spielberg ever interjecting himself as a dramatic counterpoint to, say, Indiana Jones the way Scorsese plays off Mick Jagger. We haven't seen an actual auteur ham it up like this since Alfred Hitchcock.

"We had a lot of trouble working out the ending of the film," Jagger told us. "Marty had to go to a lot of different acting coaches to do it."

"It was sad," Scorsese deadpanned. "It was sad, yeah. But I do it on my own pictures. I'm kind of [like] Edgar Kennedy — the slow burn, the guy who always used to go like this?" He slapped a palm over his face, grimaced and gradually pulled away. "That's what happens when you make films, so one of the things to do is make use of that, and literally send up the 'hapless director,' so to speak. And very often you do feel like a hapless person sitting there. The actor's doing one thing, the camera's doing another. It started to snow the other night when we were shooting. It wasn't supposed to snow. Things like that. Do we continue shooting? But that's the nature of what it is, and you have to have fun with it. There are so many documentaries and so many sections of concert films where you see the actual setting up of the concert and interviewing people, and we thought, 'Let's have fun with it.' Let's get straight to the tension — and the humor of that tension."

But does it work? You tell us; Shine a Light opens Friday.

In today's episode: Keith Richards; Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin; Victoria Beckham; Taye Diggs; Tyson Beckford and Michael Rosenbaum; A.J. McLean; Ryan Gosling; Billy Crudup; Gabriel Byrne, Justin Long and Adam Carolla; Tracy Morgan; Donald Sutherland; Rob Schneider; Adam Goldberg; David Boreanaz; Tom Welling; Ed Helms and Mindy Kaling; Harry Hamlin; Ethan Suplee; Nathan Fillion; Eric McCormack; David Katzenberg and Nicky and Kathy Hilton; Rafael Sbarge; Embeth Davidtz and Jai Rodriguez.

· With an army of Paparazzi already in place by 8:15, I knew Friday wasn't going to be a quiet night at Il Sole. Would it be Drew and Cammie? Jen or Courtney? As soon as I entered the dining room, it was clear that it would be way better than that. Keith Richards! With the wifey, the daughters, the boyfriends, all sharing wine and loud conversation around the 8-topper in the main dining room. Keith was clearly in town for the Pirates premiere and he looked the part: eye-liner, the hats and scarves, hair and even the ironic-cool, John Waters meets John Holmes hipster mustache that all the kids are wearing. The wife looked amazing, better even then the daughters. Better still, the guy had two security/assistants eating on the patio, mostly so Keith could switch spots with them every 20 minutes and smoke. Atone point, the 'razzi were swarming so badly that the management tried to hang black tablecloths in the windows. Keith just waved them off with an"Awww, fuck 'em, fuck 'em all..." and stayed planted in his seat smoking anddrinking red wine. The night ended with a quick slip out the back while security created the impression of a false exit out the front. Somehow my $55 Lobster pasta special (why did they raise it $20 when it went from a menu item to a special?) went down that much easier with Keith in the house.

· My girl was in town this weekend, and needless to say she needs to come out more often:

5/16: Coffee Bean at Sunset and Fairfax, AJ McLean looking all sorts of hot.

5/18: Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham at Kitson...had to do the touristy thing. We were practically held hostage in Lisa Klein when she popped in there as well.

5/19: Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin outside of Katsuya in Brentwood. Also saw Taye Diggs inside. Tyson Beckford and Michael Rosenbaum at Area.

· Sunday 5/20 at the Greek for Chris Isaak and Stevie Nicks- none other than Ryan Gosling, hanging with the hoi polloi and ordering French fries like a regular dude. Looked pretty much like you'd expect, tall, thin, scruffy, wearing jeans and some sort of tweedy blazer. Goes without saying he was hot as sin. While waiting in line, numerous fans greeted him and asked for pictures. He was extremely nice and obliging to all of them, while still seeming like a regular guy. Didn't think I could be more impressed with him than I already am, but he really brought it home. Later, Michael Rosenbaum emerging for (hopefully) another season of crazy-dancing antics to classic rock acts (last summer I Privacywatched the hell out of him for his Superfan body movings at Chicago/Huey Lewis). Didn't see him dance, but the man full-on accosted me at the Hospitality Table and scarfed a piece of quiche from my plate. Wanted to challenge him to a dance off, but think it will have to wait for his inevitable breakdown at the Chicago/America show in July.

· friday morning, may 18th. weho target strikes again - billy crudup pushing a cart, looking unwashed and sexy. we made eye contact and he peered right into my soul. then he went to look at lightbulbs.

· 5/19 - While having dinner around 7:30pm inside the Arclight Cafe, Gabriel Byrne was dining on the patio with a gentleman and a young lady at the outside patio. No one seemed to pay attention to him but you can hear whispers inside the cafe. While inside the cafe, everyone's favorite Mac/Apple guy, Justin Long, dining with a very attractive girl wearing a short black skirt in one of the booths. Then had Adam Carolla walk by me on his way to the restrooms after the 8:05pm Fracture showing.

· saw tracy morgan at Yamato in encino on may 18th around 9 pm. he and his entourage were in the teppan grill area. it was one of his friend's birthday and he had all the waiters singing Happy Birthday for his friend. the whole time he had his hand in the air pointing to his friend so everyone knew who it was for. we were sitting at the grill next to his so i noticed that he picked up the bill for his 4 friends at the end of the night. otherwise they were all cool. i didn't notice any drinking going on at all. kinda suprising.

· Saw Donald Sutherland having dinner at the Jonathan Club in Santa Monica on Saturday night. It looked like he was with family members - although Kiefer was not there. Donald even enjoyed some dessert of ice cream and cheesecake.

· Saturday 5/19 ..... Rob Schneider was at LACMA (Los Angeles County Museum of Art). He was wearing a casual dark suit and large sunglasses - he actually looked really cute. He was with a woman with blond straight hair, and I did not recognize her. They were coming out of the Modern West exhibit in the Hammer building, just as I was going to the ticket counter to pick up my free ticket (LACMA is free after 5pm!). I got out of line and double-backed to go look at him again and make sure it was him... They headed off towards the Ahmanson Building... and I did not see them again as I walked around the museum ....they must have left just as I arrived.

· Saw the Hebrew Hammer, Adam Goldberg, at Room Service Saturday May 19th, perusing the modern wares on the second floor (the sale floor). He was doing some fierce, furrowed-brow calculations in his head as he stared intently at the furniture. It's a chair! You sit in it! What's with all the soul searching?

· Sunday May 20th, JFK to LAX American Airlines flight, 5 pm (but we were seriously delayed, so it was more like 7 pm). As I drunkenly slogged my way through first class to my cattle car coach seat (I can be forgiven for being drunk, review previous mention of delay - spent in the airport bar), I spied DAVID BOREANAZ. I know he's on "Bones" now but he'll forever be Angel to me! He was rocking the hotness in grey sweats, a t-shirt, and a green shirt over that. He seemed jittery and nervous, maybe a nervous flier? I am too, he should have joined me in the airport bar! David seemed to be flying solo, confirmed later when I saw him at baggage claim (now sporting a newsboy cap), collecting his own luggage, all by his lonesome. No one besides me seemed to recognize him. Or maybe it was just late Sunday night and everyone at the airport just wanted to get home!

· Last Friday, spotted Superman at Samy's Camera on Fairfax. Tom Welling, dressed like an A&F model was in the video department with a girl yelling "Tom".

· 05-20-07 2 am - At the 101 Coffee Shop I saw both Ed Helms (Andy Bernard) and Mindy Kaling (Kelly Kapur) of The Office. They were there separately and I do not believe they even saw each other. Mindy left when Ed got there. Ed was there by himself for a while, looking low key in a short sleeve button up and a baseball hat, he kept checking his Treo and eventually two friends showed up. He was very nice to a few people who recognized him.

· Standing in line at the mini Sherman Oaks mall location of the Apple Store yesterday (5/18) when I noticed incredibly toned, tanned and coiffed Harry Hamlin ahead of me. Noticed I noticed before I glanced away as if I hadn't. Am I just taller than I think I am or is 5'7" the new 5'11"?

· Sunday, May 20, 2 pm(ish): Ethan Suplee coming down the escalator with, presumably, wife at the Studio City DSW; 30 minutes later and 50 yards away, Nathan Fillion at the Pinkberry.

· For those of you either poor enough to live in the Valley, or desperate enough to drive over the hill for something delicious, there is this insanely good Indian restaurant on the corner of Ventura and Stern. Know who else likes it? Eric McCormack. Actually, I don't REALLY know if he likes it because I only saw his wife exiting. Actually, she may have been exiting the gross 7-11 next to it, but I don't have a back-story on that 7-11, so I'm sticking to the Indian thing. Anyhow, Eric was sitting in the driver's seat, somewhat slumped and frowny, in his MASSIVE Mercedes. Here's the point: his wife was a bonafide hag. A hag complete with feathered, root-ridden hair and wearing one of those I'm-middle-aged- now-and-don't-even-have-to-try- plus-I'm-married-to-someone -super-wealthy-and-I'll-get-half-his-shit kind of bag-dresses from Chico's. With a huge pattern. And garish colors. And Eric looked amazingly bored and rubbed his temples furiously as if to say "Damn you, Debra Messing! You have a fabulous looking Lifetime mini series with an adorable title and huge posters featuring your wild, red mane and toothy smile and I'm sitting at the seven freaking eleven with my hound dog of a wife who simply HAD to stop and grab a Slurpie and a Hostess cupcake!"
Oh, Will—show a little grace...

· Hey, Saw Tommy Lee at Blowfish Sushi on Sunset during (make your own Maki) Happy Hour last week . They were drinking mostly beers and dressed casual - t-shirt, jeans. He was with a group of four guys rolling his own....

· 5/20 - Crossing Beverly heading toward the Farm on Sunday, I first spotted mogul spawn du jour David Katzenberg and then his lunch companions... Nicky and Kathy Hilton! The trio looked somewhat somber, understandably, and David appeared gentlemanly and affectionate (a.k.a. his hand was glued to Nicky's bum).

· Is Rafael Sbarge a Buddha in disguise?

Thursday (5/17) 10 am-ish, Silverlake TJ's. Cranky, in post-insomnia coma, I find I'm navigating two major obstacles to get to the strawberries. One, the re-rearranged aisles—beer no longer opposite shampoo, but adjacent. Hello? Two, the Obnoxo Moms blocking access to the shelves with their shopping cart/giant purse combos, jabbering high-deci on their cells (beeyatch, I don't want to hear what well, she goes and then omigod, he goes, ok?), oblivious to their melting-down offspring and the rest of us. I'm about to redline and accidentally (oops! SO sorry) crash into one to get her to move out of my way already, when out of this unbearable chaos emerges a poised dad quietly piloting his cart and adorably curly-locked kid of indeterminate gender. It's RAFAEL SBARGE (thanks IMDB), of pale face and googly eyes, fine interpreter of creepy-spineless-pervo-dude tv roles. Exuding such calm and so much gentle that it instantly blankets me with quiet and realigns my chakras. Is he a Buddha? Or, just very-well sedated? How can someone that creepy-looking (and, sorry Rafael, repulsive too) have such a strong soothing effect? Beyond that, he was ordinary in a clean-scruffy way (jeans, running shoes, flak-ish jacket), and his kid's motorcycle buckle boot added a slight edge to its angelic curls. Normal seeming dad, no "look at me while I pretend I don't care if you don't recognize me" crap, not even the "I'm so hip I moved to The East Side, like, last week" vibe. Loading both tofu and ground beef, polite, attentive to his child. Sorry. No sunglasses, no baseball cap, no drama, not even on my part.

· Saturday at the farm at the grove Embeth Davidtz (she is so beautiful no make up) was having lunch with her daughter after what looked like a big trip to American Girl........i was lunching with my mom hoping for a big trip to barneys co-op (a grown american girl place)............

· Today 5/21 at the Gelsons in WeHo:

Chatting on a cellphone standing between me and the Deli counter (usually this means risking death, but today I ate lunch): Queer Eye's Jai Rodriguez. Surprisingly tall; he must be about 5'9". Cute too.

Dies this mean that Kyan and Carson are like, 6'2"? Hmmmmm.

In today's episode: Jake Gyllenhaal; Matthew Perry and Kevin Pollak; Billy Bob Thornton; Steven Soderbergh and Jules Asner; Mike Tyson; Frankie Muniz; Matthew Fox and Alicia Silverstone; Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart; Jason Priestley; Paris and Nicole Hilton, Blake McGrath, Vincent Young and Scott Storch; Madden Brother; Wilson Cruz and Chuck Woolery.

· This evening (4-5) on Mulholland, I passed Jake Gyllenhaal on his bike. In spandex, with yellow safety flags on each side. Fit, sensible, lovely calves. Yes, please.

· Monday, saw Matthew Perry and Kevin Pollak having a conversation on the 3rd Street Promenade in Santa Monica.

· Some friends and I were at the Century City Mall Friday grabbing some over-priced grub & enjoying our Non-Al Fresco dining experience before Blades of Glory, when who do we see ambling around the food court but Billy Bob Thornton. He was clad with the requisite baseball cap & petite, pretty Asian chick (she was cute). He seemed to stare at the sushi restaurants as if he couldn't decide what to eat...you know, like us normal folk. Eventually he ordered (sushi choice number one I think) & got a table. Half my group went off to subtly stalk him while I sat there and skulked at A) how short he is & B) how CAA/ICM are slowly but surely taking us all on short ride to Hell.

· ok..I know you usually shun out of town sightings..but this began at Burbank Airport..where i spotted Steven Soderbergh and child bride looking Jules Asner unabashadely drinking beer out of plastic cups at the airport bar at 2 pm on Monday. The two were on my flight to San Francisco (all coach seating) THEN saw the them again the next day at the SF Giants opening day, sadly they must have had a better ticket broker than me because they were just a few rows behind the
Giants dugout. This time I got to watch them eating polish sausages...AND FINALLY saw the two the next night at the SF W hotel bar having cocktails. OK..besides the fact that they were eating/drinking everytime I saw them..they appeared mellow and cool. I may just forgive him for Ocean's 12.

· This morning at Crunch, I worked out behind Mike Tyson and his scary/creepy face tattoo. I know it's not the first Mike Tyson sighting at Crunch, and I noticed his shirt said "Crunch World Tour 2007" on it, so my guess is that this is all a viral marketing ploy for Crunch so that people will write into blogs like this to report seeing washed-up celebs notable for boxing and raping people. As much as I don't want to give Crunch the credit for this devious marketing scheme, I still feel obligated to report that Mike Tyson was at my gym, and quite frankly, it was a little frightening.

· while enjoying a happy hour beer and blue cheese fries at pete's downtown on tuesday, 4.3, i saw malcom in the middle—frankie muniz—himself! he was sporting a mohawk(?) and had a cute indie rock girl with him. is he married? was she his wife? anyway, they were going into the lofts above pete's. if he lives downtown, where does he park his cars? doesn't he have, like, 7 of them?

· also at the TV ON THE RADIO show on Friday (3-31), besides the super good looking Matthew Fox, was Alicia Silverstone and that Tony guy from 'no doubt' with the same ridiculous yellow hair he's been sporting since the nineties. I've seen him around before. same hair. it doesn't look good.

· Sunday afternoon (4/1) at The Grove - spotted "McSteamy" himself, Eric Dane, and wife, Rebecca Gayheart, both sipping on drinks from The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf and mingling among the little people. He was wearing jeans, tee, sneakers, sunglasses, and a baseball hat pulled down really low. Not exactly newsworthy to mention that he was gorgeous. Taller than your average celeb for sure. She...I don't know. I didn't really pay attention. I think she had on flats? I was a little too wrapped up in the whole "McSteamy" thing to notice.

· 4/3 - 11:40 am. Saw Jason Priestley today at the Target on Sepulveda in Van Nuys. He was with what looked to be his girlfriend/wife, judging by the intimate way he caressed her neck. He was wearing a black t-shirt and blue pants. She wore a beret and something black; I really wasn't paying attention to her. He's a little doughey for an actor, not all cracked-out looking. He's also not the 5'6" that imdb states on his profile. That's how tall I am and he was a good few inches shorter than me.

· While leaving the showing of Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure at Arclight on Monday, saw Dax Shepard entering the lobby. He was with some other guy that I didn't get a good look at. San Dimas High School Football RULES!

· i live and work in d.c. so i had high hopes for my first trip to l.a. in almost four years. alas, this is all i have to report:

3/29: also my birthday. went to area (hey i live in d.c.) where we waited for about a good half hour outside before bolthouse's sister (i am told) let us in. many a c-list celebrity to be seen: blake mcgrath from dancelife - surprisingly quite nice and sassy, of course. some random guy who used to be on 90210 - he had the hots for one of my friends, we chatted about the east coast. didn't realize until the next day it was vincent young (none other than eventual dylan mckay replacement, noah "the boat guy" hunter). lastly, the hiltons themselves (paris AND nicky). i actually put my hands on paris to push her out of the way when my friend lost her earring. she was a little shocked but not a word came from her lips. i'm happy to report she dances like a white girl and i saw her bite it on the dance floor. Also scott storch. looking... wait for it... greasy.

4/2: geisha house. one of the madden brothers (sans nicole or the other one but with a big burly dude instead). had a big debate about which one it was but are we really supposed to be able to tell them apart?

· Wilson Cruz at the Koo Koo Roo opposite La Brea Tar Pits. If he weren't gay as a pink hairnet, I'd be interested. Man knows how to work a tight T-shirt.

· Does this even count as a star sighting?

Saturday March 31st (which shows you how important this was), breakfast at Marmalade in Malibu with my friend visiting from NY. Who is seated across from us? Chuck Woolery. Yes, "Love Connection" Chuck Woolery. With a woman who was even near to his age, who might be his wife (an attractive Pilates blonde). She even ate a muffin with him, and the carb police weren't called.

Note to Chuck, and every non-metrosexual out there: if you insist on flip-flops, sand down the heels. Satans horny pedicure puts off other diners. If you don't want to take this simple step, opt for Topsiders.

"When [a senior Disney publicist] forwarded the [Richards] story to me ... I thought, 'How are we going to spin this?' " Dennis Rice, Disney's senior vice president for publicity, said during a presentation to the media of the studio's upcoming films Wednesday morning.

As a result of Richards' remark, which was later discounted by his representatives as just a joke, it is likely that the rocker's appearances on the red carpet in support of the film will be curtailed.

"Keith won't be doing a lot of publicity for this movie," Rice added.

In addition to trying to keep the renegade Rolling Stone away from the press, a cautious Disney PR team will also oversee an emergency renovation to their theme park's franchise-inspiring Pirates ride addressing the controversy, adding a scene in which an animatronic Teague Sparrow soberly explains to his son that even though they're both pirates and enjoy their fair share of rape, pillaging, and plunder, under no circumstances is it OK for Jack to use his cremains as snuff, providing parents and children an opportunity to discuss the uncomfortable subjects of both drug abuse and living wills.

• Snorting remark by Keith Richards doesn't sit well with Disney [LAT]