1. The Day the Earth Stood Still - $31 million
Fox's $80 million remake of the 1951 sci-fi classic opened soft despite everything going for it: suit-and-tied Reeves lurching around a planet he's about to destroy; Jennifer Connelly as a product-placement-friendly microbiologist; video-game grade CGI; and a surplus of outraged critics. If only the studio had tried its Marley & Me spoiler experiment with DTESS's campaign instead — graffitied billboards bearing text along the lines of "WE'RE FUCKED," or "FUNNIER THAN FOUR CHRISTMASES." It's not too late for week two, guys!

2. Four Christmases - $13.3 million
The Witherspoon/Vaughn comedy could break $100 million by the end of next weekend, thus necessitating fast-tracked sequel negotiations to which director Seth Gordon will respond with apprehension, ultimately departing the project and leaving the door open for Chris Weitz to make Five Christmases and Six Christmases simultaneously for '09 and '10 release dates.

3. Twilight - $8 million
Speaking of whom, the little-known "Weitz Bump" made Twilight fans out of millions of otherwise ambivalent moviegoers, whose eagerness to see what raw material their favorite director inherited last week kept the teen-vampire romance to a respectable 39% drop.

4. Bolt - $7.5 million
Itself having shaken off the stigma of its own vandalized posters suggesting the titular hero is voiced by John Travolta, the Disney film also demonstrated admirable box-office stamina in its fourth week.

5. Australia - $4.3 million
Hugh Jackman's selection as Oscar host did little for his epic, whose continued underperformance at the box office and among awards voters virtually assures its position as his first joke's punchline at next year's awardscast.

WHAT'S NEW: There's no wanting for prestige or variety this weekend, with Fox's remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still leading a saturated box-office charge on 3,600 screens. This time around, Keanu Reeves arrives from space to portend our imminent doom, evincing a timely environmental-awareness message with the aid of Jennifer Connelly and fitfully clusmy CGI. And if there's anything holiday moviegoers love, it's a Keanu apocalypse; expect Earth to pull around $38.3 million.

The next biggest opening is something called Delgo, the sci-fi quasi-Romeo & Juliet rendered with discarded Pixar 2.0 software and the budget voice talent of Freddie Prinze Jr., Jennifer Love Hewitt, Malcolm McDowell and Burt Reynolds, among others. We like this one for about $3.2 million en route to Flopz™, neck-and-neck with the Latino ensemble (plus Debra Messing for gringa kicks) laffer Nothing Like the Holidays at around $3.3 million.

Doubt, meanwhile, opens small this week against fellow Oscar groveler The Reader; the former is faring far better with critics than the latter (unfairly, we might add), but the Kate Winslet lookie-loo factor won't disappoint the Weinstein Company when the numbers come in Sunday night, probably around $41,000 per screen. Also, if you've got four and a half hours and a seat cushion to spare, pack a lunch and check out Che in its one-week-only Academy qualifying run. It's the kind of thing you can tell your grandkids about years from now when they tug on your sleeve and ask you to regale them with stories of cinema's good old bloated days.

A few stars are actually smattered elsewhere in the mire: Ethan Hawke and Mark Ruffalo's Beantown gang drama What Doesn't Kill You opens on three screens, while Michelle Williams's spare girl-loses-dog indie Wendy and Lucy arrives on two. Also opening: The noirish Dark Streets; the animated fantasy Dragon Hunters; the stop-motion Oscar hopeful $9.99; the Chinese vanity project Waiting in Beijing; the Kim Basinger revenge flick While She Was Out; and the polish Holiday tale Hania. Whew.

THE BIG LOSER: Not so much a "loser" as an example of what we wish there was less of in the world, Timecrimes is an acclaimed Spanish thriller that nevertheless orbits around the genre conventions of time travel. Not to be arbitrary about it, but dear film industry: Please let the time-travel movie die. They're ultimately the same hoary stunt performed again and again, illogically at worst (Primer) and amusingly at best (Back to the Future), and almost always forgettably. Let Timecrimes end it. Please.

THE UNDERDOG: Speaking of going out gracefully, Clint Eastwood says his performance in Gran Torino is his last. And why not? Eastwood's late-career revisionist streak has knocked off its last myth: The vigilante hero, a man who'd sooner revolt in Dirty Harry than keep pace with the degradation of social order. Torino's grizzled Korean War vet still takes the same vengeance on Hmong gangs and black thugs overtaking his Detroit suburb, but essentially in the service of a multiethnic utopia perceivable just over the horizon. (He even gives his Silver Star and titular vehicle to the tormented young man he's taken under his wing, a little more optimistic bellwether than Harry Callahan's climactic badge-tossing in 1971.) As a straight drama, Gran Torino isn't especially good — sort of a violent, profane revenge epic crossbred with an afterschool special — but! Viewed in context with the last four decades of Eastwood's mercury, it's a strikingly rich, funny, elegant and utterly fascinating valedictory.

FOR SHUT-INS: New DVD's this week include The Dark Knight, the thrilling, Oscar-chasing doc Man on Wire, the first four seasons of Happy Days, and holiday-ready complete-series box sets of The Wire, Get Smart and Deadwood.

Clint Eastwood
Not sure he really needs replacing (or can be replaced at all), as he's sort of a singular cultural institution unto himself. But if we're in the mood for a gruff, crime fightin', six gun shootin', conservative with a puddly sentimental heart, then I think we need look no further than Keanu Reeves. Don't go crazy! Yes, I understand that there was a grumbly gravitas that Eastwood brought to his silly actioners that Keanu decidedly does not bring to his, but they're kind of the same. Both, frankly, can't act for beans but it doesn't matter! There's something criminally appealing about them. They're dazzling us with their flat line delivery while pickpocketing our souls! Plus, Keanu's 44 now (can you believe that??) so he'll soon be ambling into safely Grizzled territory. Then he can start directing pictures about weary men in the weary world who wearily do weary things, like kill their molested childhood best friends or kill their ladyboxer protege, just like Clint! Just think, in thirty years time "Whoa." will be the new "Make my day."

Joaquin Phoenix
Well, this is a little difficult because he wasn't really that much of a movie star to begin with. But the Oscar-nominated star of Gladiator and the Johnny Cash biopic Walk The Line was getting big. He's got that brooding strangeness, a willful devotion to his craft resembling an angry Johnny Depp. So who could fill these curious little worn-out shoes? How about similarly-faced Gossip Girl fop Ed "Chuckles Bass" Westwick? He plays in a band, just like Joaquin! And he's shown some prissy talent and a penchant for looking gloweringly stupid while offering terse, wannabe cryptic answers to inane interview questions. Whether he's got the weird talent that Phoenix has (had?) remains to be seem. But right now he's shaping up to be a fine candidate.

Nicole Kidman
OK, she's not "officially" retiring, but she did mention it off-handedly in an interview recently! An icy internationalist with a taste for the artsy out-there movies and the big commercial films? Kidman is sort of a dream come true for Hollywood (or, at least, she was until she had a long string of bombs—The Invasion anyone?—and her face became strangely plasticine). Does any young actress have her strange, sad alien grace, those same purring smarts? Harry Potter sidekick/burgeoning sex symbol Emma Watson might in a few years. As might a couple other young actresses. But really Sienna Miller seems best poised to take the mantle. She's not American either! And she became famous for dating a famous guy (Jude Law) before she became a famous actress (is she a famous actress yet?), just like Nicole did with a now-forgotten character actor named Tom Cruise. She's cold and probably talented and already inured to the tabloid frenzy.

Angelina Jolie
Luckily, gloriously be-lipped charitably minded multi-culti talented actresses just grow on trees. We kid, we kid! Angelina Jolies are pretty rare! There are like only two of them per billion people. Which means 11 others exist, and we must find them. Who else can shoot guns and throw knives convincingly one minute, then sob and moan and act a little nuts effectively the next? Maybe this young Kristen Stewart from Twinklight could do it. She seems weird and grumpy and above-it-all. Someone put an Uzi in her hand and she how she does. Though she doesn't have the natural beauty of Jolie. Oh fuck it. You know what? She said it would probably be thirty years before she retired anyway. The new Angelina Jolie is Angelina Jolie. She's only 33 after all. (Can you believe it?)

Really the problem is that the whole talent pool has become so diluted. We're not saying that there aren't talented, beautiful people anymore, just the opposite. There are way too many out there. Meg Ryan was in every romantic comedy for a few years. That was it. No one else. Now we've got Elizabeth Banks and Kate Hudson and Sandra Bullock (sort of?) and Anne Hathaway and etc. etc. Too many. We blame the internet. We're not sure why, but this is probably its fault.

Take Bruce Willis for example (whose "conservative credentials often are exaggerated," according to the author), Ian McKellen ("Tom Hanks' co-star in The Da Vinci Code," we're reminded) and Jodie Foster, who is, of course, a lesbian and thus thoroughly godless by default. Warren Buffett and Bill Gates are outed as agnostics, meanwhile, and the feature ends with the obligatory bone-throw in the direction of God-fearing GOP actor emeritus Jon Voight.

Like you, we wondered what the real Newsmax angle might be here — if maybe they really are turning a new celeb leaf, or if this was Plan B after "Hollywood's 10 Jewishest Jews" simply proved too unwieldy a subject to whittle down on deadline. But after a second, closer, read, we think we get it: Straight-up bitterness. And not of the post-election variety either, but something far more ingrained: "You'd think hollywood stars would drop to their knees every day to give thanks for their fame, fortune, and beauty," the author notes. Maybe so, but his kind are technically responsible for The Love Guru, so let's just call it even for now, OK?

• Hollywood's
  Top 10 Atheists [Newsmax]

Boomp3.com

A London woman attempted to take advantage of a “hall pass” given to her by her husband and tried to put the moves on The Day The Earth Stood Still star Keanu Reeves. Reeves was rather high up on the woman’s list of male celebrities she’s allowed to sleep with with total immunity. The woman propositioned Reeves, but the actor politely declined despite being extremely flattered.

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Boomp3.com

The Day The Earth Stood Still star Keanu Reeves prepared himself for a taste explosions before enjoying a sandwich from a popular Los Angeles eatery. Reeves decided to wear a helmet since the last time he ate a sandwich from the restaurant knocked him directly on the floor. Reeves said, “It’s cliché to say it, but it was like whoa after that first bite. And the second bite knocked me directly off my seat. I bruised my back. So, I’m ready this around.” Reeves then tapped on his helmet.

[Photo Credit: X17]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Apparently unconcerned with the prospects of inconveniencing his lunching companions at Orso, The Day The Earth Stood Still star Keanu Reeves took a phone call when the waiter was about to take everyone's order. Reeves told his friend on the other line that he was free to talk and talked for a couple of minutes in a fairly calm voice. One of his tablemates rolled their eyes as Reeves carried on his conversation, then whispered to the rest of the table, "I don't really mind him talking. I just wish it was something interesting, you know? So, I could have something to send into a cool blog or TMZ. You know, I want to be the cool person on the internet for a change." At which point one of the other leaned across the table, grabbed their hands and whispered, "One day, you will. Just not today. Now, could you please pass the olive oil?"

[Photo Credit: INF Daily]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

·You'll never believe it, but Nikki Finke also stayed home, instead publishing dispatches by the New Times chain's resident nerd-hack Luke Y. Thompson. And what a run he's had, with his marathon Thursday bringing us hints at a Keanu Reeves love-in (we'll get to that) and the indelible image of Rose McGowan's Red Sonja knife-licking. She and Robert Rodriguez apparently remain a couple despite all kinds of fun rumors otherwise and, obviously, despite the worst movie poster to ever debut at Comic-Con. That said, hemogravy is hot with the ladies these days, so maybe we're the ones out of touch.

·LYT draws praise, meanwhile, from David Poland, who also decided to crunch some numbers from the comfort of his own couch:

How ironic is it that every studio in L.A. is scrambling to get to San Diego this week/weekend, but The Dark Knight barely did anything (except for very basic viral marketing stunts) last year and underperformers Beowulf, Halloween, The Incredible Hulk, Shoot 'Em Up, Southland Tales, Drillbit Taylor, Spiderwick Chronicles, Hot Rod, and others all had a big presence at The 'Con.

Well, yeah, but none of them had a Fanboy Blowjob Train. Must we really spell it out?

·SpoutBlog has some of the most comprehensive coverage emerging from San Diego, including a real-time account of Wolfman star Benicio Del Toro falling asleep, a peek at Rocknrolla with attention-loving Gerard Butler and a Lego statue that will never be accused of assaulting its Mom.

· Amy Smart, Crank 2, public sex, etc.

· The NY Times brings a typically dignified tone to the pants-wetting in Hall H, featuring cameos by Hugh Jackman, Mark Wahlberg, the gang from Twilight, and a version of Waiting for Godot starring Dakota Fanning in the title role.

· Finally, /Film features a play-by-play of clips from the eco-sensitive Keanu Reeves remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still — better than the real thing, we're sure. Very sure.

boomp3.com

In a scene that was eerily reminiscent of the 1982 Scott Baio film Zapped!, popular movie star Keanu Reeves finally put to use of some of the telepathic techniques he learned from the Matrix film series. Only instead of using them for quote-unquote "good", he decided to have a little fun and make this woman's top fall off instead. After all, Reeves just began his summer holiday in France and, after a few ho-hum days, he decided to kick his vacay up a notch. Reeves said, "France is fun and all, but it got pretty boring pretty fast. So I just thought really hard and KABOOMBA! That woman's top fell off, then that one and so on and so on." Reeves thought that the female beachgoers would object to the seemingly random acts of clothing removal, but the beachgoers surprised Reeves with their casual attitudes towards nudity. Reeves added, "Everybody has been real cool about it and just went with it. I mean, if I did this in America, surely TMZ would catch wind of it. And I don't have to tell you this, but NOBODY likes it when that long-haired dude rips into them. Speaking of whom, does he remind you of Bodhi at all? Not even just a little?"

[Photo Credit: X17]

boomp3.com


While enjoying drinks with a friend, actor Keanu Reeves surprised a New York resident who happened to walk by. The New Yorker asked Reeves a series of questions regarding any potential sequels to the films: Johnny Mnemonic and Speed; the man said that the world could use more movies like those these days. Reeves shrugged his shoulders and explained that it wasn't up to him, but rather those evil movie studios, which got a chuckle out of Reeves' friend. The New Yorker said, "Whatever, man. Just don't make anymore of those Matrix movies. They made everybody dress like Hot Topic ravers."

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

1. They already have a sex tape.And it's a cartoon! The two already played on-screen love interests in the Richard Linklater druggie film A Scanner Darkly, and though we barely had a clue which drugs Winona's character was on and when, we do recall a midnight seduction scene in which Keanu sleeps over. Sure, he has some kind of nightmare involving dead blondes in the bed, but all that matters is the fact that these two have no need to film their own inevitably released sex tape.
2. They can both fuck up as much as possible. Let's face it, each of them has made a lot of dumb moves in their lives and their careers. From the shoplifting scandal to Street Kings, they both know what it's like to be judged by others, so they probably won't pass untoward and unreasonable judgements on each other.
3. We really need a reason to go see their movie.As much as we adore Daniel Day-Lewis and his wife Rebecca Miller, her last directorial attempt came in the form of The Ballad Of Jack And Rose, a movie we wanted to love desperately but found ourselves sleeping through. She's currently directing Keanu and Winona in an adaptation of her novel The Private Lives Of Pippa Lee, starring Robin Wright Penn, essentially her acting equivalent in both talent and watchability.

• NEW COUPLE ALERT: KEANU REEVES & WINONA RYDER [Star]

1. Prom Night — $22.7 million
We could sit here and spit with resentment over the windfall greeting this PG-13 slasher knock-off, but what's the point? OK, OK — besides protesting against the continued ruination of more than 2 million teenagers who've never seen a good mainstream horror movie. And besides lamenting the certain incentive for Prom Night 2. And besides... all right, fine, we're spitting with resentment.

2. Street Kings — $12 million
Fox Searchlight took a gamble opening wide with this Keanu Reeves/Forest Whitaker cop thriller, which found scorn among critics and audiences alike. Consider this the last time the Searchlight gang ignores the sage advice of distribution wunderkind Scarlett Johansson.

3. 21 — $11 million
The surprise hit sustained in the top three in its third week of release, bringing its gross to more than $62 million and guaranteeing a slew of teen-oriented gambling films that will alternate opening weekends with its Sony/Screen Gems' Prom Night franchise.

4. Nim's Island — $9 million
We have yet to meet anybody who has actually seen this movie, thus convincing us it's really just a vast Walden Media conspiracy to make George Clooney feel bad about...

5. Leatherheads — $6.2 million
For the second straight week, Clooney establishes himself as the A-list actor/director who can't outperform Jim Sturgess (21) or Abigail Breslin (Nim's Island). Only the Nipple Suit represents a greater indignity — for now.

boomp3.com

At the premiere for the upcoming film, Street Kings, Keanu Reeves and his powerful phermones caused a woman to pass out from her heightened state of excitement. The unidentified woman told near by fans that she couldn't believe she was able to get so close to the Bill & Ted star, let alone have him say something to her. She thought at the most she was going to see the top of his head, but the woman instead was able to say "Hey" before passing out cold.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

We have our own theories about why Ellroy adaptations have yet to explode the author's cult, but we defer this morning to noted industry observer Scarlett Johansson, who seems to suggest that kids these days just don't get it:

Johansson, who played '40s vamp Kay Lake in Black Dahlia, talked about how difficult his words were to put across. "As a modern actor, we made this movement that started in the 1970s. ... Realism and the gritty kind of natural technique. It was interesting to pair that with the dialogue so stylized and impossibly unrealistic, saying things like, 'How could you, Dwight, how could you?' We never say those things. That kind of dialogue is so dated."

"Interesting" naturally meaning "impossible," if you've seen Brian De Palma's atrocious Dahlia adaptation. In any case, it doesn't pay for Ellroy to comment on the curse that's afflicted the majority of his films; during an interview prior to Dahlia's release in 2006, he told me, "Money is the gift no one ever returns," and God knows his aggression won't extend to elliptical, snappy second-guessing of Reeves' leading role in Kings. We know it's business, but why must Ellroy — and his adaptees — always leave us wanting more? And not in a good way?

• Hollywood's James Ellroy enigma [LAT]

Since the actors will clearly be well past their "party on" prime, we here at Defamer would like to pitch that they play fathers to a new generation of phone-booth time-traveling dimwits (quick casting call: Chad Michael Murray and McLovin). Only after reuniting with their favorite historical characters at the big San Dimas High football season ender do they remember their rocking ways. After all, as Reeves says, the Wyld Stallyns live "in each and every once of us." Sometimes we just need a sequel to bring them out.

• Keanu Reeves Leaves Door Open on Most Excellent 'Bill & Ted 3' [MTV]

In today's episode: Quentin Tarantino; Keanu Reeves; Michael Rapaport; Giovanni Ribisi; Ray Liotta; Peter Berg and Henry Winkler; Chris Noth; Anthony Kiedis; Billy Baldwin; Dina Meyer; and Brad Beyer.

· Saturday, 3/23
Quentin Tarantino was downing something fruity with one of those dragon stirrers in it at Good Luck. He was with a couple of completely average looking (you know, pretty but not Hollywood pretty) women and was bigger (both lengthwise and widthwise) than I would have thought. The indie bartenders were all atwitter...and probably actually on Twitter.

· 1. Sunday March 16th. Michael Rapaport at Fred Siegel on Melrose. Sitting at the entrance of the restaurant starring into space or at everyone who enters. Very rabid and intense looking. Aggressively picking his teeth. One shoe dangling off of his foot. Prominent bald spot.

2. Wednesday March 19th. Keanu Reeves at Locanda Veneta West 3rd dining with 3 women. One woman looked very similar to Parker Posey, perhaps it was? Very discreet, he sat facing away from entrance.

3. Thursday March 20th. Giovanni Ribisi at Long's Drugs across from the Beverly Center. The extremely skinny Scientologist with very tight jeans had finished his purchases at the check out and then turned his full cart around and went back into the store and came back to the cashier with epsom salts and box of Magnum Condoms [Ed.: Ahem].

· Ray Liotta was right next to me at Gold's Gym in Venice yesterday March 20th on the chest machine. The guy has had a lot of work done.

· Two interesting celebrities dining at Pizzeria Mozza Saturday late lunch/early dinner: Peter Berg, dining with a lovely lady and Henry Winkler, seemingly with family.

· It's a biggie! Who has gotten a tan, touched up his roots and is looking a whole lot better? Mr Big himself, Chris Noth. Spotted on Sunset Blvd & Horn Ave, across from the old Tower Records and Spago in a white t-shirt and blue sweatpants. Looks like he's been working out. Still has a belly, but it looks OK in that high school gym teacher way. Nice meaty ass too! I'd say he looks powerful.

· March 18 - So I'm pretty sure I just saw Anthony Kiedis mad riding a skateboard on the lumpy, snaggy, uneven sidewalk down Sunset in Silverlake, (like slaloming!), with baby in his arms. Mama was walking behind.

· sunday (3/24) on the starbucks patio in beverly hills (s. beverly drive) i was sitting next to william 'billy' baldwin (and cute daughter). he was wearing a funny hat and plaid pants. i really enjoyed his work in backdraft.

· I've seen the ubiquitous Dina Meyer with her ever present "galpal" THREE times in 3 days. One woman you don't see for years unless she's dying on-screen but lately she's everywhere (at least in Santa Monica)! Late Sunday night she was with her galpal at Bob's Market on Ocean Park buying wine and cheese. Then saw her Monday just on 6pm at It's a Grind on SaMo & 6th, they were crammed in a corner sipping lattes and reading what looked like a script together. Then again yesterday (Tues) she was gassing up the must-have celeb vehicle - silver Prius at Shell on Lincoln & Pico with same friend again. Don't mind running into her at all - she's aging very nicely!

· Friday, 3-21-08, 1:30pm: Brad Beyer, the tall and handsome blonde and blue-eyed stoic farmer from "Jericho," on Santa Monica Main Street, wearing his trademark aviators. HOTTTT!!!! Didn't Les Moonves just dink this show? f so, that would explain the Chenbot looking female who beaned him with a 2 lb pound bag of peanuts thrown from her Mercedes convertible right at the time of this sighting..

7. Skinny Acid-Washed Jeans, Trainspotting, 1996: Sadly, the men-in-skinny-jeans trend has resurfaced and found a permanent spot in post-millenial fashion history, but Mark and his fellow addicts managed to suck all the "chic" out of "heroin chic."

6. Black Leather Trenches, The Matrix, 1999: We never thought one item of clothing could completely destroy Keanu Reeves' sex appeal, but those stiff leather trenches he wore in the future effectively inspired high-school lunatics and killed girl wood on sight.

5. Tighty Whities, Risky Business, 1983: Oh dear. Strange how the singing-in-tighty-whities scene has quiety morphed from a legendary hot moment in movie history to a completely sexless farce now that Tom has laughed maniacally one too many times.

4. Excessively Visible Chest-Hair, Scarface, 1983: Tony's tiny little butt-hugging suits weren't horrendous, but his decision to make them neck-plunging was. With collars unbuttoned down to his heaving bosoms, we felt like we were being cinematically strangled with Cuban chest hair.

3. Flannel Shirts and Pedro 'Staches, Clerks, 1994: There are only two men in history who could pull off the grunge look without looking like homeless hipsters, and they were Kurt Cobain and Eddie Vedder. However cute and funny you thought Dante was, he still had stains on his faded jeans and holes in his flannels.

2. Codpieces, A Clockwork Orange, 1971: We didn't exactly think Malcolm McDowell and his droogs looked unsexy in their codpieces and top hats, but we're certainly glad men in the 70s waited til Tony Manero danced his way into their closets before picking a solid style icon.

1. Bondage Gear, Edward Scissorhands, 1990: Even Johnny Depp couldn't manage to make Edward's S&M-inspired leather suit a trendy little number. And even though one could argue his cakey make-up and tangled hair led the goth movement into fashion spreads, we're just glad our boyfriends never showed up wearing a patent leather turtleneck.

• 50 FILMS THAT INFLUENCED MEN'S STYLE [Men's Vogue]

The lawsuit said Reeves struck Alison Silva on March 19 and alleges that Silva suffered shock and serious injuries. The lawsuit, filed in Los Angeles Superior Court, seeks unspecified damages.

According to reports at the time of the accident, Reeves was leaving a parking space in a residential area near Los Verdes County Golf Course, about 30 miles south of downtown Los Angeles. [...]

An attorney for Reeves said then that Silva was blocking Reeves' way and that if there was a collision, it was not hard enough to injure the photographer.

The coupe-hobbled photographer's lawyers might argue that in her attempt to score a money-shot of the star emerging from a Los Verdes parking spot—an image that could score upwards of tens of dollars on the open tabloid market!—that the responsibility really fell to Reeves to ensure the safety of everything around him. Checking behind every tire for any supine photographers before pulling away, after all, is as standard a celebrity safety procedure as buckling one's seatbelt, or double-checking one's hotness in the rear-view mirror.

• Photographer: Keanu Reeves hit me with Porsche [AP]