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disasters
The Sad Reality of Joaquin Phoenix's Act
The never-ending parade of miseries that is Joaquin Phoenix's is-he-or-isn't-he trip from retiring actor to budding rapper rumbles on. In this chapter, he fights a heckler at a Miami show. More » -
lookalikes
Ben Stiller Ripped Off That Joaquin Phoenix Impression
Ben Stiller reportedly flipped out over his Oscar script the day before this year's show. But the Joaquin Phoenix impersonation he came up with as a replacement was hardly original. More » -
clips
Alec Baldwin Mocks Joaquin Phoenix
Somehow we knew Alec Baldwin would come for you first, Joaquin Phoenix. The actor seems as hostile to strung-out hippies as his 30 Rock alter ego Jack Donaghy. More » -
disasters
Joaquin Phoenix Seems Genuinely Collapsed, Director Says
Everyone's been debating whether Joaquin Phoenix's crack-up, as evidenced on Letterman the other night, is real or a hoax. It sure looked real to the director of his last movie. More » -
hoaxes
Finally, Someone Claims Responsibility For Joaquin Phoenix's Terrible Hoaxing
There is a man in this photo with Joaquin Phoenix. Learn his face, for he may be the dark wizard conjurer behind Phoenix's career transformation into a trainwreck. More » -
meltdowns
Career Suicide Caps Joaquin Phoenix's 'Late Show' Stupid Human Tricks
For all the hoaxy drama behind Joaquin Phoenix's hip-hop ambitions, you can't say the guy isn't serious about effectively throwing his film career away after watching his spectacular self-immolation last night on The Late Show. More » -
crackpot theories
Joaquin Phoenix Is Both Deeply Disturbed and Faking It
His disastrous Letterman interview brought Joaquin Phoenix's whole quitting-acting-to-become-a-bearded-rapper shtick to a dizzying climax last night. Dave played it off as legit. Others think it's all an Andy Kaufman-esque hoax. We think it's both!
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clips
Joaquin Phoenix's Letterman Disaster
Here's Joaquin Phoenix on David Letterman later tonight, either stoned out of his mind or just medically catatonic (or both). Letterman makes several heroic efforts to politely prompt Phoenix before ruthlessly mocking him. More » -
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hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix's Director Recalls His Screamy, Charcoal-Eating Commitment
If you had any doubts that Joaquin Phoenix will push his hoaxy rapper persona into the depths of career ignominy, let his Two Lovers director fill you in on his insane level of commitment. More » -
two lovers
Gwyneth Paltrow Unimpressed By Joaquin Phoenix's Cinematic Rapping
If Joaquin Phoenix really hopes to convince the world that he's the world's greatest undiscovered rapper (and not simply its least essential hoaxer), he may have to start with winning over Gwyneth Paltrow. More » -
hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix Struggles To Keep Straight Face While Debunking Hoax Rumors
Like a weird uncle who gives his adult nephew a present that reads "From Santa," Joaquin Phoenix is still struggling to prop up a hoax-y music career that's way past its sell-by date. More » -
hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix's Hoax Denial Doesn't Actually Deny Anything
Now that everyone has finally called bullshit on Joaquin Phoenix, his rep has issued a denial of the rumor/CLEAR TRUE FACT that his music career is just a hoax. However, precious little is really denied: More » -
hoaxes
Other Publications Starting To Call Bullshit On Joaquin Phoenix
We hope we've adequately prepared you for this shock: Joaquin Phoenix's rap career may be an elaborate hoax. Yes, we've pointed this out before, but now, two sources are confirming the stunt to Entertainment Weekly: More » -
hoaxes
Joaquin Phoenix's Rap Career Demands Punctuality, Crotch-Baring
We may never know whether Joaquin Phoenix donned oven mitts and rocked the Queer Lounge at Sundance, but today, we know far more about his disastrous "performance" in Las Vegas than we ever wanted to. More » -
sundance
Did A Disguised Joaquin Phoenix Crash This Gay Sundance Party?
Many of you have wondered if the eccentric douchebag featured recently in our Sundance quotes roundup was none other than newly minted faux-idiot Joaquin Phoenix. Let's examine the evidence! More » -
hoaxes
Didn't We Call Bullshit On Joaquin Phoenix Already?
...Because he's still going through with this pretend "quitting acting to become a rap star" chicanery. In fact, THR has broken more news about this supposed life trajectory that we are simply refusing to believe: More » -
joaquin phoenix
Time to Call Bullshit on Joaquin Phoenix's 'Retirement'
We'll admit that when Joaquin Phoenix first announced (in an incoherent mumble) that he would be quitting acting, we weren't quite sure whether it was all just an elaborate stunt. Then, we remembered the tale of Greenbo, Phoenix's brain-eating frog, and thought it was simply par for the course with the erratic actor. Still, since the announcement, Phoenix's weird behavior has felt increasingly staged for the cameras — and, in fact, he has his own cameras following him around, "recording his transition from film to music." The final straw came when we found an incriminating set of pictures from Phoenix's first performance, along with this explanation: -
Listicle
Who Will Replace Our Retiring Movie Stars?
Every movie star everywhere is quitting! In today's case of old Clint Eastwood it makes sense, because he's, y'know, old and his directing career has been a lot more illustrious than his acting career has for the past decade or so. But the once-promising, now-squandered Joaquin Phoenix? Baby mill Angelina Jolie? Nicole Kidman?? If they leave, then what are we to do? Find new movie stars, I guess. Trouble is, there aren't really any good, young understudies waiting in the wings. But there might be some! We'll take a look at who could replace these four retiring (or maybe semi-retiring) actors after the jump. More » -
joaquin phoenix
It's True: Joaquin Phoenix Wishes A Fond Bye!Good To Hollywood
We've been vexed, terribly vexed by Joaquin Phoenix's slurred proclamation to Extra that he planned to give up acting to follow in the illustrious, thesp rock footsteps of The Bacon Brothers and 30 Odd Foot of Grunts. Was he seriously quitting the business, or was it all a ruse for some forlorn, Sundance Channel takeoff of Punk'd? Then, at the Saturday AFI Fest part for Che, Phoenix did what any actor ready to leave Hollywood would do: a full red carpet press tour, complete with the hastily scrawled words "Bye!" and "Good" on opposite knuckles (perhaps he takes his sentence structure cues from the backwards "B"-sporting Ashley Todd). Said Phoenix to the AP: More » -
joaquin phoenix
Joaquin Phoenix Retirement Announcement More Awkward Than We'd Ever Imagined
When Extra revealed on Tuesday that Joaquin Phoenix had announced his mumbled retirement from acting, little did we know that the video of said declaration (captured at Monday's Paul Newman charity benefit) would immediately enshrine itself in the annals of red carpet awkwardness forever. Thanks to a clip furnished by E!, we've got the entire, baffling experience, as an out-of-it Phoenix confesses all to Extra correspondent Jerry Penacoli, takes offense at Penacoli's disbelieving laughter, then storms off. More » -
joaquin phoenix
Breaking! Joaquin Phoenix Quits Acting Forever To Pursue Garage Band Dreams
Though Joaquin Phoenix was once famously saved from a car wreck by wacko auteur Werner Herzog, apparently there's one aspect to the actor still in dangerous need of resuscitation: his love of acting. While attending a Paul Newman charity benefit last night, Phoenix told Extra that he's done, finished, finito with doing films, and he's got one shaky reason why: More » -
defamer
How Werner Saved Joaquin Phoenix, In His Own Words
Likely to nobody's surprise, Defamer's interlude last week with Werner Herzog yielded far more than just a few minutes' worth of feud-worthy slaps at his contemporary Abel Ferrara, whose Bad Lieutenant Herzog isremakingcontinuing later this year with Nicolas Cage. We also had the opportunity to get Herzog's side of a story first reported two years back by the L.A. Times, in which Joaquin Phoenix credited eyewitness Herzog for relaxing him after the actor rolled his car in Laurel Canyon. More » -
cannes film festival
Today in Cannes Hell: Gwyneth Paltrow's Breast, Critic Riots and a Word with Charlie Kaufman
With the minor exception of missing out on Jim Toback's documentary on Mike Tyson (which will screen here this fall anyway — we can wait), the only regret we have so far about sitting out the Cannes Film Festival is our absence at the mini-riot that preceded the press screening of director James Gray's drama Two Lovers, starring Joaquin Phoenix and Gwyneth Paltrow. That's when we're at our best, as were Lou Lumenick and the "major U.S. film critic" (*cough* Manohla Dargis *cough*) who apparently exclaimed, "I'm not going to wait an hour for f—-ing James Gray" before an ensuing screening delay, shoving match and seating free-for-all. More » -
Liv Lovers
Liv Tyler Gets Separated, But Her Rebound Prospects Look Strong
After all that hullabaloo following Liv Tylerโs missing wedding ring (and missing date) at Mondayโs Costume Institute Gala, the dimpled rocker spawn has officially announced that she and husband of five years Royston Langdon "have confirmed their separation." Whether this means those divorce rumors from weeks ago will materialize or that the pair is just going on one of those godawful โbreaksโ that never work out (see: Swank/Lowe and Richards/Sheen) is unknown so far. But after we took a look at Livโs previous paramours, we have a feeling Tyler will have no problem finding a worthy suitor. More » -
defamer
Mischievous Amazon Natives Have Their Way With A Passed-Out-Drunk Joaquin Phoenix
Pictured, an Italian Vanity Fair spread featuring a partially-nude former child star not likely to provoke the kinds of outrage elicited by the Miley Cyrus debacle. Rather, it features actor Joaquin Phoenix, in the process of receiving the tribal markings of the Yawanawa people of the Brazilian Amazon. (You'll recall indelible black markings figured prominently in his silent protest at this year's People's Choice Awards, as well.) Moments later, Phoenix was presented with an hallucinogenic tree toad—a ceremonial offering which he then licked greedily, causing one tribe elder to admonish him not to "Bogart the frog." His eyes then proceeded to dilate, and the actor giggled uncontrollably as he was promptly revisited by the large, amphibious friend who had once emerged from his hair on the Walk the Line red carpet. More » -
defamer
After watching the People's Choice Awards clip we posted a little while ago, a commenter points out that Favorite Leading Man honoree Joaquin Phoenix seems to have misspelled his own name—an error that serves to further illustrate the point about how utterly lost actors are without their writers. [Defamer] -
defamer
Responding to a query about how he so convincingly portrayed a vomiting fit in We Own the Night, method actor and occasional frog-envisioning, red carpet hallucinator Joaquin Phoenix explains his ralfing technique: "You take a lot of cereal, you drink a lot of milk and you pound down two waters in a row and you jump up and down and you put your hand down your throat and you wiggle it all around until you vomit." [pr-inside.com] -
defamer
Acting is all about the craft? Fuck that! It's the easiest paycheck you'll ever cash, says Joaquin Phoenix: "I never prepare. I think that's completely overrated. It's a very simple job. All you have to do is . . . stand in the right spot and say the line. So I don't really believe in preparation." [Page Six] -
trade roundup
Will Smith Retains Services Of 'Happyness' Heartstring-Tugging Technicians Once Again
ยท Will Smith re-teams with his Pursuit of Happyness creatives for Seven Pounds, the story of a guy who falls in love while trying to kill himself [Ed.note—Isn't it a little tacky to be announcing a suicide movie so soon after the Owen incident? Just sayin'.], hoping that audiences will shed just as many tears watching Smith nobly overcome personal adversity as they did when he was hugging his kid while sleeping in that filthy Happyness bathroom. [Variety] More » -
hollywood privacywatch
Vince Vaughn Enjoys Kirsten Dunst's 'Spider-Man 3' Singing For All The Wrong Reasons
PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so if lady luck should happen to gift you with one, don't squander it: Write it up and send it in! Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line) and tell everyone about the time you took silent inventory of Ryan Gosling's Downtown YMCA workout routine. More » -
sightings
Hollywood PrivacyWatch: Clive Owen Enjoys Artisanal, Brick Oven Pizzas As Much As The Next Guy
PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in like you mean it. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line) and let everyone know about the time you saw the star of your favorite new bra commercial reading someone the riot act, quite possibly over her appearance in that very ad! More » -
defamer
Trade Round-Up: CBS To Stream Shows, Screw Guilds
· CBS announces that it will stream episodes of its shows (at least the ones it fully owns) on its broadband Innertube channel the day after they initially air on the "real" network. The online shows will still be ad-supported, so those looking to destabilize CBS's business model should still watch on DVR and blast through the commercials. [Variety] More » -
sightings
Hollywood PrivacyWatch: Joaquin Phoenix's Secret Musical Shame
Hollywood PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers. Send yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put sighting or PrivacyWatch in the subject line) and let the world know you saw Judd Nelson shopping for sex toys, but didn't recall his vibrator scene in From the Hip. More » -
trade roundup
Trade Round-Up: Cronenberg Does Hollywood
· MGM is close to a deal with the Weinstein Co. to become their exclusive distributor. The pact will be reflected in an update of their classic logo, replacing Leo the Lion with Bob Weinstein lying flat on his belly, roaring ferociously at an assistant who brought him a regular Diet Coke instead of a Diet Coke with Splenda. [Variety] More » -
defamer
Joaquin Phoenix Has Post-Accident Brush With Famous-Enough Director
Today's LAT has the strange, only-in-LA! story of the aftermath of Joaquin Phoenix's Thursday afternoon car wreck in Laurel Canyon. The stage was set for Hollyweirdness, with Phoenix—an Oscar nominee, you will recall—sitting in the overturned car, dazed and trying to decide if the whiteness before his eyes was the welcoming glow of the afterlife or simply a deployed airbag, when he heard a strange voice: More » -
defamer
Folsom Prisoners Go Star Crazy For Visiting Joaquin
The much publicized Joaquin Phoenix appearance and screening of the Johnny Cash biopic Walk the Line at Folsom Prison took place Tuesday; after the movie was shown, Phoenix performed some Cash songs for a select group of inmates, as the rest of the 4,000 prisoners watched on closed circuit TV from their cells. Phoenix was then given a tour, which gave him a first hand look at Folsom culture: More » -
defamer
Joaquin Phoenix's Mushrooms Kick In On Red Carpet
At last night's AFI Fest premiere of hotly-buzzed about Johnny Cash biopic Walk the Line, star Joaquin Phoenix fielded scores of red carpet questions about his uncanny, 'yes-that's-him-playing- and-singing' transformation into the Man in Black. But with one AP reporter, Phoenix gets momentarily sidetracked: More » -
movies
Joaquin Phoenix Lays Groundwork For Oscar Nomination
Come Oscar time, Joaquin Phoenix wants people recognizing his hard work and preparation, not talking about how he took the easy way out by using his personal pain to play Johnny Cash in Walk the Line. Phoenix gets upset about the subject in Newsweek: More »
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