It's a tough question, but the emboldened Zed wasn't backing down in a press release tossed over the Defamer transom:

Recently, there has been a surge in interest in Sanskrit tattoo designs and symbols among Hollywood and other celebrities. [...]

Rajan Zed has urged Jessica Alba and other celebrities who carry Sanskrit tattoos to go beyond the fashion statement and indulge in serious study of rich philosophical thought, which Hinduism provides. He offered to gladly provide the resources the serious seekers among celebrities need for their study and research. [...] Hollywood celebrities needed to have more patience and go beyond the superficial because Hinduism concepts evolved over thousands of years and needed deep study.

We don't doubt it. As Zed goes on to note, "Sanskrit is considered a sacred language, the language of the gods. Tattoos go back in history to at least since Neolithic times." Alba, Tommy Lee, Rihanna and other namechecked members of the Sanskritted Elite would absolutely do well to figure out what is they're getting into, lest a curse like the one that doomed Love Guru — for which Alba is already doing a few thousand years in Hell — befall their poor choices in skin adornment. And don't forget, gang: Stephen Baldwin is always around for counsel, too, should you decide on a bigger, more contemporary cover-up.

''He was emotionally needy and got more difficult as the shoot went along,'' [Wayne's World director Penelope] Spheeris says. ''You should have heard him bitching when I was trying to do that 'Bohemian Rhapsody' scene: 'I can't move my neck like that! Why do we have to do this so many times? No one is going to laugh at that!''' To manage Myers' moods, Spheeris put her daughter in charge of making sure he had whatever snack he needed at any given moment: ''To this day, I have this image of her sitting on this little cooler, looking at me, like, 'Mom, I f—-ing hate you.'''

But then came Austin Powers, and like a snaggle-toothed, chest-haired phoenix, Myers soared back into the hearts of his worst enemies:

''I hated that bastard for years,'' says Spheeris, who believes Myers dissuaded Paramount from hiring her for Wayne's World 2. ''But when I saw Austin Powers, I went, 'I forgive you, Mike.''' She pauses, voice choked with emotion. '''You can be moody, you can be a jerk, you can be things that others of us can't be — because you are profoundly talented. And I forgive you.'''

Though she also adds, "Maybe he could open, like, a children's hospital to clean up his rep. He's got to do something pretty quick," so there's a bit of a ways to go still. But those whom Myers has helped make rich — the Jeffrey Katzenbergs, Jay Roaches and Lorne Michaelses — are a little more sanguine, all readily admitting that Myers' skill comes with strings attached, and all apparently prepared to forgive the sitar-rocking, Troyer-baking Love Guru ancillaries that have Myers facing a future of hell. And that's just in Hollywood — don't even get us started again on the whole Hindu-curse part of the equation.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

• Mike Myers: Man of Mystery [EW]

• WATCH VIDEO

Joining in this campaign is the Spiritual Science Research Foundation, whose editor Sean Clarke has outlined the spiritual consequence for being associated in the movie. Based on an afterlife demerit point system, those involved with making the movie can anticipate residence in the second region of hell for 1,000 years. Watching it for entertainment would carry its share of consequences, too.

As baffled others are quick to point out, anti-Love Guru spearhead Rajan Zed has not yet seen the movie, though Paramount reportedly promised him an early preview that he pledged to take advantage of. Still, we are deeply troubled by the 1,000 years of damnation facing beloved figures like Myers, Alba and particularly Verne Troyer, whose one-two punch of Postal and The Love Guru (not to mention his mortifying Surreal Life stint prior to that) seems like a millennium of personal and professional hell no Hindu demerits could possibly outstack.

And anyway, if a real-life love guru can get out of a molestation rap in Texas for $10 million, surely the stars can bargain with someone in this crowd who has some afterlife influence.

• Hating the Love Guru [Eye Weekly]

Father Charles T. Durante, a Catholic priest well respected in northern Nevada for his various community outreach efforts, in a statement, said, "...it is important that we respect those parts of every faith tradition which are held especially sacred. I applaud Paramount Pictures for being open to the request of Hindu leaders to preview this film and listen to any concerns that may arise for them..."

Rabbi Jonathan B. Freirich, a well known Jewish leader in parts of California and Nevada, in a statement today, stressed, "While The Love Guru appears to be a funny take on New Age spirituality, it seems like it may portray many Hindu practices in a less than sensitive light...it would be appropriate for the producers of The Love Guru to make efforts to assure the religious communities of the United States that they in no way wish to make any general statements about Hinduism."

It's a little late for that, according to one of Zed's more incensed allies, who yesterday told Toronto's Eye Weekly: "Gurus don't exist to fix your love life. ... From what I could tell this movie will only help to spread ignorance." Meanwhile, America's outraged, pan-spiritual dwarf community is expected to speak out soon against the egregious mishandling of old Myers chum Verne Troyer, subject in the trailer alone to "shrimp" jokes, hockey injuries and stand-ins for an Oscar statuette. Insult, meet injury.

• Hindus get some non-Hindu support... [Yahoo! India]
• No love for Mike Myers? [Eye Weekly]