Look, would we have translated the dialect into a little more elegant English, as opposed to the more stilted "Engrish" of Hancock? Yeah, probably. But we're not quite ready for the boycott action proposed by this particularly incensed viewer:

I don't know the grammar of Chinese or any other Asian languages, so I don't know if this construction is correct according to whatever language they're speaking, but come on. Have the writers of this movie ever seen a foreign film? Subtitles don't translate word-for-word. It's not like German movies are subtitled with shit like "You like when I making the food, jaaaaa?" Japanese films don't have "Ridicurous!" along the bottom of the screen. Seriously, do they get what subtitles are? These people are speaking their native language. ... I no pay for next Will Smith movie.

That's fine — judging by the ready availability of this screen grab, he didn't pay for this one either. But anyway, don't hold it against Smith; we hear the especially insidious "subtitle thetans" will be among the first to go at the megastar's swanky new school in Calabasas.

• Producers of 'Hancock' don't understand what subtitles are [Rottin' in Denmark via THND]

1. Hancock - $66 million
When not delighting crowds at New Village Academy Oh-Tee Eights games as that wrestling team's mascot Elron the Iguana, Will Smith also manages to shatter records in only the way The Biggest Star in the World can. His presence in Hancock, for example, turned an ill-conceived, anti-superhero movie about an alcoholic underachiever who accidentally puts out fires with his super-upchuck abilities into something America simply had to experience for themselves: $107.3 million over 5.5 days, $66 million from the weekend alone. That works out to roughly 10 million people who surveyed the sour, puckering butt-face (above) used as the film's central marketing image, and paid to see this movie anyway. That's superstardom.

2. Wall-E - $33.417 million
Pixar's melancholy meditation on the dark (seriously dark!) places towards which our things-obsessed society is heading crossed the $100 million mark over the weekend. The film's message is so bold, however, that its makers—who have long relied on merchandising and fast food tie-ins to push the product—suddenly find themselves painted into an ideological corner. Still, Disney has come up with a P.R.-friendly solution: Disney's Sprout In A Boot ™ foundation pledges that for every square-mile of Wall-E packaging dumped into the nation's landfills, a single bean sproutling potted in an adorable hobo's boot will be donated to a worthy school, for display and educational purposes.

3. Wanted - $20.607 million
4. Get Smart - $11.125 million
5. Kung Fu Panda - $7.5 million
Summer '08s Trio of Assassin Entertainments continue their stealthy creep towards profitability and inevitable sequeldom. But only one of these three contains an army of suicide-bombing rodents, waging jihad bis saif against those who have wronged them. We'll never tell which—you'll just have to see all three to find out!

8. Kit Kittredge: An American Girl - $3.6 million
The wide-release of the Depression-era movie based on the wildly popular American Girl doll franchise managed only a disappointing eighth place. Audience feedback suggested most of the intended demo lost interest once they realized the narrative was essentially locked-in, and that they couldn't drag star Abigail Breslin into a hair salon for a braid-treatment and some tea and cucumber sandwiches whenever they felt like it.

• BOX OFFICE MOJO WEEKEND BOX OFFICE July 4-6, 2008 [Box Office Mojo]

· "Hancock can offer only an A-list headliner in a D-list project." — Michael Phillips, Chicago Tribune

· "Squanders potential greatness with lame humor and a half-baked hero." — Robert Wilonsky, Village Voice

· "It's a strange feeling to see the summer's most promising premise self-destruct into something bizarre and unsatisfying, but that is the Hancock experience." — Kenneth Turan, Los Angeles Times

· "It has a big sag in the middle that nothing could have fixed." — Mick LaSalle, San Francisco Chronicle

· "This movie fails so spectacularly - and on so many levels - that it's like watching a train plummet off a bridge." — Lou Lumenick, New York Post

Harsh! Has the king of the 4th of July weekend finally been dethroned? Probably not, because, critics be damned, I'm still gonna see it. Seems like the American thing to do. But perhaps Will Smith should spend less time founding robot-building Scientology schools and pay more attention to the scripts he chooses.

• Hancock [Rotten Tomatoes]

"If a student is learning how to make a robot, he or she needs to see or touch the materials and computer right in front of him or her rather than just imagining how to make it."

"If a teacher is showing a student how to make the robot and the student suddenly is confused, the teacher makes sure to go back to the place the student stopped understanding and re-teach that point."

"In addition, NVA teachers make sure children understand the meanings of all of the words related to each lesson whether in math or in music, or as in the robot example - all of the words related to making the robot."

"Similarly, if the student is learning how to program the robot and comes across a word that he is unfamiliar with, the student must look it up in the dictionary or have the word explained by a teacher."

What the fuck is going on here? Has Will Smith learned nothing from starring in I, Robot? Here he is hell-bent on making these kids build robot after robot, yet he knows full well that they will rise up against humanity one day. Talk about irresponsible. I'd rather send my kid to the Scientology Celebrity Centre!

• New Village Academy

boomp3.com



After an appearance on MTV's TRL, beloved actor Jason Bateman was confronted by his Hancock co-stars Will Smith and Charlize Theron about the rumors of an Arrested Development film. Smith was very excited about the cult television series making a leap to the big screen. Smith said, "I hope you're not lying about this. I can't take another heartbreak about Arrested Development. It took me a good six months to get over it being canceled. Barry Zuckerkorn is my wallpaper on my laptop."

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

boomp3.com



Hancock star Charlize Theron began to feel a tad bit self-conscious about her height while walking into 30 Rock for a taping of the Today show. The 5'10" actress noticed that she towered over all of her escorts into the studio. Theron said, "I know that I'm taller than the average girl, but those guys...the guys walking in me made me feel like I was Shaq or something." A member of Theron's entourage thought maybe it was her shoes that made her look so tall, but Theron thought it was a sensible heel size. Theron said, "It's only a two inch heel. So, that makes me what? Six feet? There has to be a guy in New York that's over six feet. Stop giving me a complex. "

[Photo Credit: INF Daily]

boomp3.com



A bodyguard outside the Ed Sullivan theater reportedly had an out of body experience as Hancock star Will Smith walked by. The bodyguard said, "I should be used to being around all these famous people, but there are just moments when the logic bone in the brain turns off. Sometimes, you just stare at the guy and it's like I Am Legend: Part 2." The bodyguard began to elaborate on his fantasy where he and Smith continue to fight vampires in a post apocalyptic New York. The bodyguard added, "I rarely daydream at the job, but this was just one of those moments where it happened and it was kind of nice to zone out. I just hope that nobody noticed because that might make the next job a bit more difficult to get."

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

boomp3.com



While posing for photographs at the Paris premiere for Hancock, Will Smith tried his hardest to not look down the dress of his co-star, Charlize Theron. Smith felt that it was one of his more difficult challenges he had faced in his professional career. Smith said, "Professionalism seems to be lacking in today's world and I don't want to come off as being unprofessional by checking out my co-star's breasts." Smith added that if he did do it, it could have spread like wildfire all over the internet. Theron appreciated Smith's decision to not look down her, but wished that Smith would've suggested that another Hancock co-star use the same gentlemanly approach with her. Theron said, "I wish would've had a heart to heart with Jason Bateman beforehand. I was about to charge the guy admission. Then again, he was on Arrested Development, so I guess he gets a pass."

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

"After word got out that Will was a secret Scientologist, reps from Sony [the studio behind Hancock] completely flipped out, and asked that the online exclusive be taken down immediately. After being refused, Sony forced Smith to speak out and release a denial statement."

As our source explained, it appears the folks at Sony weren't the only ones up in arms about the Smith and Scientology claims. Apparently Will and his family have been giving money to the Church for years, though they've done a fantastic job keeping their donations under the radar. Says our source, "After Smith's Scientologist friends saw the denial today, they got incredibly pissed and some asked him, 'you're still gonna donate money, right?'" Considering the secretive nature of many celebrity Scientologists, coupled with an urgent request from a major studio to remove a rumor on a gossip site, it's time to take this story up a notch from rumor to fact. Since when do execs at a studio as powerful as Sony reach out to news-gathering organizations and attempt to use their leverage in order to kill potentially damaging stories? Oh yeah, that's right, since forever! We applaud the folks over at MSNBC for sticking to their guns (and their story).

• Will Smith, Jada the new faces of Scientology? [MSNBC]