"We're trying to resuscitate this franchise from the fucking cellar!"

We kid, we kid. We applaud Ed Norton for his willingness to poke fun at the public and industry perception of him (and also for not caving into the pressure to turn this into an unbearable "I'm Fucking The Hulk" sketch). And while we would've liked to have seen him add a bit of pseudo-intellectual heft to the normally inane talk show publicity circuit, it's worthwhile to note that he did hit the red carpet at the film's premiere and resisted the urge to heckle Liv Tyler when she botched Coldplay's name at the MTV Movie Awards. And while we doubt that the lack of Norton on Letterman made any real dent in Fanboy Nation's appetite to cream their purple jean shorts at the multiplex this weekend, there is one question that remains unanswered that would make for the journalistic score of the first-half of 2008: what does Ed Norton really think of the film?

• Jimmy Kimmel Live! [ABC]

THE FULL TEXT OF EDWARD NORTON'S E-MAILED STATEMENT

"Like so many people I've loved the story of The Hulk since I was a kid, so it was thrilling when Marvel asked me to write and help produce an altogether new screen incarnation, as well as play Bruce Banner. I grew up reading Marvel Comics and always loved the mythic dimension and contemporary themes in the stories, and I'm proud of the script I wrote. In every phase of production, including the editing, working with Louis Leterrier has been wonderful...I've never had a better partner, and the collaboration with all the rest of the creative team has been terrific. Every good movie gets forged through collaboration, and different ideas among people who are all committed and respect the validity of each other's opinions is the heart of filmmaking.

Regrettably, our healthy process, which is and should be a private matter, was misrepresented publicly as a 'dispute,' seized on by people looking for a good story, and has been distorted to such a degree that it risks distracting from the film itself, which Marvel, Universal and I refuse to let happen. It has always been my firm conviction that films should speak for themselves and that knowing too much about how they are made diminishes the magic of watching them. All of us believe The Incredible Hulk will excite old fans and create new ones and be a huge hit...our focus has always been to deliver the Hulk that people have been waiting for and keep the worldwide love affair with the big green guy going strong.''

Again, we are terribly sorry to have latched on to any misrepresentations, especially the ones of Norton being a handful to work with. Sure, as EW's Gregory Kirschling reports, that legend of his commandeering American History X is true, and Leterrier does diplomatically acknowledge Norton and Marvel couldn't agree on a cut, and Norton did take a month to reply to EW... but whatever. As for Norton's claim that "knowing too much about how [movies] are made diminishes the magic of watching them," we totally agree. We will stop asking unanswered questions — like whether or not Norton will promote the film (is it too much to suggest this doesn't reassure us?) — or even being interested right away. For Norton's sake, we trust you'll do the same.

• 'The Incredible Hulk': Behind-the-Scenes Drama [EW]

Mr. Norton and Marvel, which has the right of final approval on the film, have sparred in recent weeks over trims, among other issues, said studio executives involved, who asked to remain anonymous as they were not authorized to speak publicly. Mr. Norton — who was hired to rewrite the script along with playing the lead — has made it clear he won't cooperate with publicity plans if he's not happy with the final product, these people said.

A spokeswoman for Mr. Norton said he had no comment. [Marvel chairman David] Maisel brushed off the friction as par for the course.

"When you get to this point in the process, there are always lots of passionate discussions," he said. "Edward is very passionate. He is as passionate about the Hulk as we are." (For those unaccustomed to Hollywood speak, "very passionate" roughly translates to a seven on the "he's a difficult person" scale.)

And for those unaccustomed to Brooks Barnes speak, "among other issues" roughly translates to "the Hulk effects look like they were done on a Commodore 64." Nagging specifics aside, we've heard all this before about Norton, and while we don't believe for a minute that he will sit out promotion for Hulk, we look forward to his carefully engineered sabotage of press conferences ("I dunno... Liv Tyler, you wanna answer that?") and television appearances ("Actually, Jay, let me tell you how poorly that clip was originally written...") leading up to the June 13 release date.

• What's Big and Green, and Desperate to Be a Hit All Over? [NYT]