Gawker: defamer, free advertising dept

Will Ferrell Admirably Unafraid To Use His Body To Sell Some Tickets

Mark — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 17:55:45 EST

Sure, the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue spread showing Will Ferrell pawing at a bikini- clad Heidi Klum was a mildly titillating stab at selling the movie with skin, but we suppose the magazine's decency standards prevented New Line's marketing team from doing what they really needed to do to push Semi-Pro: strip Ferrell to his tube socks, blow out his thicket of chest hair, and hand him a genital-obscuring, ABA-regulation prop. Mercifully, basketball doesn't employ the kind of phallus-shaped equipment that might have tempted the studio to take the photo in a more tumescent direction.

[In case you want to know what you're actually gaping at, it's the inside of a promotional CD for Jackie Moon's "Love Me Sexy" single that just arrived at Defamer HQ. Sample lyrics: "Let's get sweaty/Let's get real sweaty/I'm talking rainforest sweaty/I'm talking swamp sweaty/Let's fill the bathtub full of sweat." In the interest of observing our own decency standards, we'll refrain from transcribing the "lick me/suck me sexy" portion of the song.]

Previously: Will Ferrell Takes 'Semi-Pro' Crossover Tour To 'SI' Swimsuit Issue [Defamer]

Pepsi Pays Justin Timberlake Rumored $2 Million To Undergo Painful Sterlization During Super Bowl

Mark — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 18:51:08 EST

This Sunday, as you may have heard, is the Super Game, wherein the NFL attempts to atone for whatever heinous crimes its players have committed over the preceding year by providing America with an action-packed, four-hour festival of the most creatively ambitious, highest-budgeted advertainments your favorite corporations have to offer.

Realizing that the public can't possibility wait three more days to delight in the Hollywood-quality production in which they've obviously invested so much love, Pepsi has pre-debuted its 60-second mini-movie on the YouTubes, releasing blogspot-savvy fans from the agony of not knowing what Andy Samberg looks like in drag. Their marketing message, in our estimation, is both simple and effective: Our cola is so delicious that Justin Timberlake's genitals must be tortured. Over and over again. Enjoy, then consume.

Pepsi Stuff Super Bowl Ad featuring Justin Timberlake [YouTube]

Hungry, Striking Writers Offered Chance To Punch Up Taco Bell Sauce Packet Jokes

Mark — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 17:17:41 EST

Never afraid to be Hollywood-topical when they sense there's a chance to move some chalupas, the always-inventive Taco Bell marketing team has just issued a press release touting their latest promotion, an invitation to striking WGA members to submit the "words of wisdom" that adorn their hot sauce packets, generously offering a much needed outlet for the "untapped creativity" they're might otherwise misdirect towards projects like viral videos and boredom-inspired novels.

Ten lucky, starving comedy writers not intimidated by the challenge of improving upon slogans like "Use your stomach, nacho mind," and "The road to mediocrity is littered with empty ketchup packets," stand to win a year's supply of Taco Bell-branded foodstuffs (a prize worth a whopping $260), as well as the satisfaction of knowing that their best one-liners will not be wasted on a mumbling Charlie Sheen or a schlubby husband bickering with his too-hot wife..

Writers Guild Sauce Wisdoms [tacobell.com]
Previously: Annals Of Opportunistic Marketing: K-Fed Invited To Explore Outside-The-Bun Career Path [Defamer]