Gawker: defamer, false terribles

Even The Lure Of Christie Brinkley In The Next Room Won't Prevent This Man From Jerking Off To Internet Porn

Molly Friedman — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 18:40:00 EDT

When fighting a highly publicized custody battle with the modeling industry's reigning Good Girl Next Door, it's probably not the smartest move to give Al Goldstein and Larry Flynt a run for their money as dirtiest old man. But that's just what pervy adulterer Peter Cook did yesterday while testifying against original Uptown Girl Christie Brinkley. Providing us with a handy preview of Rob Lowe's inevitable court date fighting for his straight-laced honor, the hottie architect let loose a series of confessions involving adorably vintage tales of web cam masturbation, office sex, and hush money hidden behind paintings. Read on for the sordid admissions that caused Cook to reach for a hankie and cry jurors a river.

As TMZ reports, Cook "broke down crying after getting grilled on the stand...[and] admitted he masturbated in front of a web cam and frequented escort, porn and swinger sites, all while married to Brinkley." Cook also unleashed a salty waterfall of tears while 'fessing up to a $300k extortion scam gone awry, in which he gradually donated large sums of money to his then-18-year old mistress' Get Rich By Boinking Celebrities fundraiser by stashing cash under rocks and other office decor. But the most grim allegation came from Brinkley's lawyer, who claims her prepubescent son Jack (from an earlier marriage) stumbled across nudie pics of "young girls" on Cook's computer. Which must have surely aided the kid's expected progression towards following Billy Joel on the path towards future wives young enough to be his daughter.

[Photo credit: Wireimage]

BRINKLEY'S EX - A REAL JERK-OFF [TMZ]

Rob Lowe's Nanny Finally Teaches Us The Definition Of 'False Terrible'

Molly Friedman — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 13:35:00 EDT

As we learned last week, Brat Pack alum Rob Lowe's method of dealing with a pesky sexual harrassment charge made by his nanny includes letting the world know just how angry he is via blog. And coining our favorite new entry into the celebrity lexicon by calling the nanny's claims "false terribles." But as we saw on the Today Show this morning, nanny Jessica Gibson isn't letting catchy phrases stop her from standing by her accusations. And she's got one heck of a pit bull for an attorney to say that for her. Though Gibson could barely get a word in this morning, People reveals the lascivious nature of what exactly qualifies as a false terrible. The gory details and video of her interview, after the jump.

According to Gibson, Lowe was quite the rascal. In her lawsuit, she is alleging that the actor "put his hand down her pants" several times over the course of two and a half years. And late last year, he pulled the switcheroo and grabbed her butt. And just in case these moves weren't getting the point across sufficiently, Gibson claims Lowe "repeatedly exposed himself," just like a proper after hours flasher. But the bigger question, as Meredith Vieira pointed out this morning, is why Gibson would continue working for the Lowe family if the man of the house was as pervy as she says? Apparently it's hard out there for a nanny. She "needed the job," and as her lawyer points out, she finally left after all those years without a single prospect! If that isn't proof in the pudding, we don't know what is.

FORMER NANNY: ROB LOWE EXPOSED HIMSELF TO ME [People]

A Week Of False Terribles

Mark Graham — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 22:00:00 EDT

As we put this week to bed, it's time to reflect, project, deflect and genuflect on the week that was...
· Big week for Gorgeous George Clooney. His passion project, Leatherheads,
disappointed at the box office (twice!), he was on the receiving end of a threatening phone call and his sand-loving girlfriend turned his bachelor pad into Yankee Candle outlet. Ah, who are we kidding? He can still pull digits with the best of 'em.
· Ellen Page butched it up on Leno and may (or may not!) have dissed Hanoi Jane.
· Certainly, Tom Cruise has had better weeks. MGM tried to spin Valkyrie's second release date pushback as a B.O. ploy, but we knew better.
· Artie Lange and Charlton Heston both had shitty weeks, too. Artie resigned from the Howard Stern Show and Charlton, well, he died.
· The hackiest hack that ever hacked, Uwe Boll, found himself on the wrong end of an online petition that might just end his career (fingers crossed!). Howevs, he was able to leverage the power of the internet to fight back ... twice!
· It was Musical Chairs week at Hollywood's biggest talent agencies. Bob DeNiro bolted from CAA (spurring a hilarious poison pen post from the Death Star), Nick Stevens led one of "the biggest agent migrations in years" when he bolted from UTA to Endeavor and a finch with a mean streak wreaked havoc at CAA shortly after Ashton Kutcher became the agency's newest client.
· Teri Hatcher and Clint Black learned that they're both better off sticking with their day jobs.
· After publicly (and somewhat shadily) announcing that he and his wife were victims of an alleged extortion attempt by his nanny, Rob Lowe displayed the keen ability to turn an adjective into a noun when he coined the term "false terribles."

Rob Lowe And His Vicious Laundry List Of False Terribles

Mark Graham — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 20:00:00 EDT

If you're planning on going out and getting bombed tonight, it's best to do so on a full stomach. Enter Dirt Sandwich, carefully crafted by Defamer's Top Chef, Molly McAleer. Each week, she grazes through the rich pasture of tabloid television for the juiciest ingredients and then stacks them all together into an easily digestible sammy, one that's guaranteed to soak up all the booze you'll be pouring down your gullet this evening. This week's Dirt Sandwich features Robin Williams' appearance at Idol Gives Back (not showing any sign of his personal troubles!), the first interview Denise Richards has ever given in her bathroom (an E! News exclusive!), Jamie Lynn Spears' romantic birthday dinner at a Louisiana Ruby Tuesdays (say what you will, but their Double Chocolate Cake is KILLER) and, of course, Rob Lowe's allegations that his nanny was set to blackmail him with "a vicious laundry list of false terribles" (which, btw, became word of the week at Defamer HQ). Enjoy, kids ... False Terribles!

WATCH VIDEO

Rob Lowe Accused Of Sexual Harrassment, Takes To The Blogosphere To Fight Nanny's Extortion Attempt

Molly Friedman — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 12:30:00 EDT

It's one thing when Courtney Love blogs about her legal problems, but Rob Lowe? Maybe it's our Brat Pack fever or simply the fact that he's always flashing the peace sign, but we never figured Lowe as the type to air his dirty laundry online. Especially when the laundry in question involves an alleged "close and intimate relationship" with a former nanny. According to a HuffPo post by Lowe yesterday, a longtime nanny is trying to extort money from him and his wife after claiming Rob pulled a Jude Law:

"A former employee is demanding my wife Sheryl and I pay her $1.5 million by the end of the week or she will accuse us both of a vicious laundry list of false terribles."

But Lowe isn't stopping at fierce prose to set things straight; more details on the "false terribles" and hanky panky after the jump.

Lowe goes on to print text messages from the nanny detailing her gushy "I Quit" notice to Lowe's wife Sheryl, in which she states "I have nothing bad 2 say about your family." Not according to Lowe, who says she is claiming Lowe "sexually harrassed" her and hoped he would divorce the "abusive" Sheryl. And while this 26-page accusation certainly deserves center stage, Lowe's lawyer has two other juicy suits to deal with: one against a former chef who Lowe says had sex in his bed and stole medicine from the cabinets, and yet a third suit against another nanny who is accused of spreading crazy lies about the couple and talking dirty in front of the kids. After all this grumbling, we're wondering if Lowe should put the past behind him and simply start hiring his staff through a different employment agency.

[Photo Credit: Wireimage]

HOUSEHOLD BETRAYAL [HuffPo]
ROB LOWE SUES THREE EX-EMPLOYEES IN EXTORTION CLAIM [People]