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Popular TV doc Katherine Heigl nearly passed out on the red carpet after catching a whiff of her beloved pooch’s breath. Heigl knew her dog’s breath was going to be rather intense, but she obviously underestimated the strength of it. Heigl said, “Looks like we’ll have to up Ronaldo’s brushings to five times a day like his mommy.” Heigl also mentioned she will most likely introduce an intensive program similar to the program she introduced to break rocker husband Joshua Kelley of his bad single-man habits. Heigl added, “It took two weeks, but he learned to love sitting down while going pee.”

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

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At the AFI Night At The Movies event held at the Arclight, beloved Hollywood icon Dustin Hoffman broke into a rather pitchy rendition of “Hound Dog” with Bullseye, the Target mascot. Hoffman and Bullseye fielded some requests from the crowd, but due to Bullseye’s limited vocal range, they were forced to perform “Hound Dog” one more time. After the encore, Hoffman hoped that Bullseye expand his song category in the future. Hoffman said, “I would love to do some old standards one night with old Bully. A night of Cole Porter? Bully is good, but he has a long ways to go."

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

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Jake Gyllenhaal’s Dog: Hey Reese, do you know when Jake is getting back?

Reese Witherspoon: Uh….What?

J.G.D.: My dad, Jake. Do you know when he’s coming home?

(Witherspoon removes one of her ear buds)

R.W.: Sorry. I couldn’t hear you there. Listening to Bob Seger.

(Jake Gyllenhaal’s Dog nods his head.)

J.G.D: Gotta love the Seger. I’m more of a Springstein fan. Anyways, I asked if you knew when my dad was getting back? I kind of miss him. A lot.

R.W.: Well, mommy misses him too.

J.G.D.: Wait…whoa..wait. You’re my mom?

R.W.: Well, I’m working on it. I don’t want to jinx myself though.

J.G.D.: So, no idea as to when he’s coming back home? Can he get e-mail out wherever he is.

R.W: Oh yeah. We do that iChat thing with the cameras all the time. He looks great. Tan and all buff. You’d be impressed.

J.G.D: So, you’ve been talking to my dad all this time? Not fair. Not fair at all.

R.W.: I didn’t know you were so concerned. You’re just usually licking yourself or sleeping, so I wasn’t sure. I will let you talk to him the next time we talk, okay?

Photo Credit: Flynet

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

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Jessica Biel: Hey, do you want to go to the park today? Play with the other dogs?
Jessica Biel's Dog: Too hot for park today. Also, there are too many people there. Way too many.
J.B.: Well, do you want to go a movie? Catch that new Batman movie?
J.B.D: I saw it the other day with the dog from next door. We went to the Bridge. I'll never make that mistake again.
J.B.: Why's that?
J.B.D: It's like a smaller version of City Walk. Ugh. If it's not the Arclight, then it's probably bullshit. You know what I mean?
J.B.: Yeah....So, what do you want to do today?
J.B.D.: Do you want to get a smoothie?
J.B.: Nah. Do you just want to sit in front of a fan and do Darth Vader impressions?
J.B.D.: Best idea I heard all day.

[Photo Credit: X17]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

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All those of hours of practice and hard work finally paid off for Reese Witherspoon and her bulldog as they successfully struck a similar pose on their way to Fred Segal. Witherspoon was inspired by the CBS reality series Greatest American Dog and wanted to have a symbiotic relationship with the pup. Witherspoon didn't want to become a crazy dog lady, but she realized that her bulldog was just too cute to not pal around with while in Hollywood.

[Photo Credit: X17]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

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David Faustino launched his own dog walking business Wednesday afternoon in Hollywood. Faustino got the idea to start the business after seeing a couple of neighborhood kids earn five bucks for walking his next door neighbor's dog. Faustino said, "I like to walk. I like the fresh air. I like to make money and I got some time on my hands. And since I kind of like dogs, the whole thing just clicked. So, here I am today with my first client, Officer Scraps." Bud's Buddies, the name of Faustino's business, is currently serving the Hollywood area; the cost is five dollars per dog, plus a small fee if Faustino has to scoop up any dog business.

[Photo Credit: X17]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

"Since I have a dog and blond hair, that must mean we're alike. It's a dumb thing to say. I don't think that makes us similar," Lively tells the new issue of Seventeen. "I don't know her, but I don't like being compared to anyone by somebody who doesn't know me. I'm my own person. I don't go to clubs, I don't party, I don't dance on tables and I don't like sex tapes."

She doesn't like sex tapes? Has journalism really sunk so far that the reporter for Seventeen (which I can now read and get all the references) couldn't bother interjecting to get some clarification on that question? I mean, does she mean that she doesn't like "making" them (which would be a bummer) or "watching" them? Because there's one little fella out there with a sex tape that sure could use the extra cashflow if Lively were to pick up a copy of his work. But sex tape inquiries aside, we feel for Lively, we really do. We have no idea why anyone would confuse an actress who rose to prominence by playing a tall, blonde, sexually promiscuous and often times inebriated socialite would get confused for a tall, blonde, sexually promiscuous and often times inebriated socialite. Here's hoping that movie about a magical pair of elastic-waisted denim pantaloons helps Lively break out of the typecasting rut that Hollywood has pegged her into. It's hard out there for a starlet, it really is.

• I'M NO PARIS [NY Post]

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While out running errands in Los Angeles, Jumper star Rachel Bilson allowed her dog, Thurmen Murmen, to take a spin behind the wheel of her car. Bilson told friends that her dog can't be as bad as most of the people driving in Los Angeles and, at the very least, Murmen would not text and drive as most people do. Her friends were quickly point to that her dog could not reach the gas pedal and brake. Bilson nodded in agreement and explained that she would handle the pedals. She was overheard telling one confidant that "Thurmen is certainly a better driver than Gary Busey."

[Photo Credit: Flynet]

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Perpetually cute actress Amy Adams took a break from being the cute one while out walking her brand new puppies in Brooklyn Thursday afternoon. Adams told the photographer that it felt refreshing to be stopped by children because of her puppies for once, rather than for the usual reasons (which, duh, is because she was in Enchanted). Adams said that her new puppies also distract people from the unflattering haircut she's sporting. "It's for a role," she explained.

Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin

[Photo: Photolink.net]

• Celebrity Photos [NY Post]

Sources over at X17 say that Yoo was rushed to the hospital for stitches. But we're wondering if this isn't part of Bosworth's master plan to sick her Cujo-like beast on every young actor in Hollywood so that the only person left to cast is her. Lord knows she won't get ahead solely on the "strength" of her acting.

[Photo Credit: X17]

• X17 Xclusive - Kate Bosworth's Dog Bites [X17]

[*As dumb as this conceit is, we're still not gonna make the bitch joke. Even though we suspect that the existence of this object—even more than the Paris Hilton stuff and the wildfires— is a sure sign the Reckoning is finally upon us.]

• Doggie Style: Cell Phones, Webcams and GPS for Hounds [Wired via Gizmodo]
• PetsCell [PetsMobility]