That's probably another record of some sort for a wide release's quickest disappearance from the multiplex, where Delgo in fact plunged to a truly stunning $19 per-screen average (yes, nineteen) on Monday, inching back up to $21 per screen by Wednesday. Today, our search for show times anywhere in the United States was futile, and distributor-for-hire Freestyle Releasing has wiped it clean from its Web site. Nevertheless, Delgo posters are still in stock at Amazon, should your living room be wanting for just the right souvenir of history-making box-office failure.

• 'Delgo' [Box Office Mojo]

Although "efforts" is probably an overstatement for what turned up today on Amazon, where a Delgo one-sheet can be yours for the low, low price of $19.99 plus shipping — a small premium to pay (33% off!) for the holiday gift symbolizing the year's most beloved $237-per-screen grosser.

But don't take our word for it; as the retailer itself reminds us in the "product features" section here, "You are looking at a great poster." You also happen to be looking at what we believe to be the first-ever promotional campaign making the viewer solely responsible for its exposure. Truly the first of its kind, and worth every penny. Bonus: Bundle with hot Fox property How to Talk to Girls for the gag-gift tandem of the season.

• 'Delgo' Poster [Amazon]

A commenter points out distributor Freestyle Releasing's revised weekend numbers for the Jennifer Love Hewitt/Freddie Prinze/Val Kilmer et. al. curio, which have been downgraded to $511,920 — a staggering $237 per screen, further digging into its new record as the lowest-grossing opening ever for a film released in more than 2,000 theaters. This brushes against some of the all-time greats of box-office futility, with only one $30-grossing Katherine Heigl masterpiece standing between Delgo and history.

When we say, "Job well done, Freestyle," we sincerely mean it; you almost have to market it specifically not to be seen to fail this spectacularly. Again, those publicity stills help. Let's see if we can't get down to a two-digit PTA in week two, cool? Let us know how we can help.

• 'Delgo' [Box Office Mojo]

Delgo's $916,000 gross is the lowest ever by a film that opened on more than 2,000 screens — 2,160 to be exact. Its $424 per-theater average means that some showings of the animated sci-fi fantasy in more competitive markets likely played to audiences of fewer than five people at a time. Last Friday's Defamer Attractions column foresaw $3.2 million for the movie, based on general tracking data and the probability that distributor Freestyle Releasing could at least break seven figures with a voice cast including Freddie Prinze Jr., Jennifer Love Hewitt, Val Kilmer, Burt Reynolds, Malcolm McDowell, Chris Kattan, Kelly Ripa, Michael Clarke Duncan, and even posthumous work by Anne Bancroft.

But one cannot attribute a bomb of this magnitude to marketing and promotional failures alone. What really happened? Your theories are more than welcome below, but we think we may have traced the source to this uniquely unappetizing publicity still that will nevertheless look great on the Flopz™ Web site. Anyone got a better idea?

• Delgo [Box Office Mojo]