Buzz Cuts Gone Good:
Though they both donned powder-dusted ponytails together in Interview With The Vampire, both Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt's best look to date is the crop cut. Think Cruise in all the MI films as opposed to his Village People allusion in Magnolia, or Brad in all the Ocean's movies vs. that caveman look we never even got to see on the big screen for The Fountain. And for all his demerits, from daring to put down Madonna to failing to ever make us laugh, Justin Timberlake's sole redeeming attribute is his near-perfection of the style.

Buzz Cuts Gone Bad:
We happen to be among the few remaining females still ignoring all those silly gay rumors and clinging to Jake Gyllenhaal's heterosexual plausibility. But every crush reaches a standstill at some point, and re: Jake, that point was officially reached courtesy of Jarhead, which required The Jake to feign military obedience and cut it all off. Despite a yearning to see as much of Jake's skin as possible, we didn't appreciate said skin being exposed so plentifully on his scalp. And anyone besides us feverishly following the depressingly rapid decrease in blooming hair on Jude Law's curiously peaked head knows a buzz cut hasn't resulted in the best aesthetic for the rock heiress-snogging star. Finally, we know she's not technically a male celebrity, but no one proved just how wrong a buzz can look than Britney Spears and her infamous self-shearing.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images, Celebrity Details, Beauty And The Bath, Dark Horizons, All Things D and Dyli.org]

• STYLE IT LIKE BECKHAM: ROCKER JOHN MAYER COPIES DAVID'S LOOK [Daily Mail]
• JOSH BROLIN: I'M 'IN A BAD PREDICAMENT RIGHT NOW' [HuffPo]

Tom's macho, chest-baring role in Top Gun was less about getting the girl than it was about male bonding, a topic the VP's Military Man knows quite a bit about. And Cruise's shiny leather vest and gelled back hair in Magnolia surely taught him a thing or two about squeezing larger than life pecs into confining fabrics, though a quick viewing of Leatherman's moves will provide guidance on how to bust a move when it's raining men.

Tom spent some time propping a rock hard construction hat atop his pretty mane while overseeing a Crenshaw construction project last year, but we're sure some practice would lead to Cruise mastering the VP Construction Guy's ability to wear that hat without mussing up a 'do. Of course Cruise will have to add some bling to his Independence Day get-up to look as tricked out as the VP Cowboy, and we highly suggest he arm himself as the group's resident cop did, while playing a German officer overseas.

And no, we would never forget the 70s group's peacocked out Indian chief, but without any Dances With Wolves-esque parts on his resume, we suggest summoning fellow nutcase and tribal expert Mel Gibson to step in as Tom's mentor. As long as no one mentions the fact that Cruise is portraying a gay guy dressed head to toe in feathers and plumes, all should be well.

[Photo credits: rotten.com, nerve.com, Bear's Garage, X17]

Though Jack Nicholson and Dennis Hopper may have dropped LSD together and smoked a reported 155 joints in a row for just one Easy Rider scene, pictures of the legends puffing on cigars still pop up on the internets to this day. Along with Keith Richards, who continued to prove his immortality by walking this year's Shine A Light red carpet in NY with an ever-present cigarette, Hollywood's most infamous chimneys have been replaced by even heavier habit-afflicted youngsters. Mary-Kate Olsen is so addicted to her Marlboro Reds that she regularly lights up in gala bathrooms, while Shia LaBeouf recently set off security alarms at the Smithsonian in between shooting scenes for Transformers 2 because the bitch-slapper lit up in the john. And we're all well aware that chain-smoker Sam Ronson appears to have gotten lesbionic BFF Lindsay Lohan hooked — though all the straight edge forces within not-so-straight bestie T.R. Knight still haven't done much to come between Heigl and her American Spirits. Which is actually fine with us — the "throatier" her laugh, the weaker her chances of becoming the next Julia Roberts become!

[Photo credits: Wireimage, That Computer Guy, Skinny Celebrities, Extra TV, Just Jared]

• JACK BLACK KICKS HE NICOTINE HABIT [Snarkerati]

What makes this particular game of bingo far more fun than usual is struggling to figure out which Olsen is which. And in an effort to help you out, we'll clue you in to the fact that Ashley, who hasn't clung to The Prune as obsessively as MK recently, appears only thrice in our montage. Let the guessing games begin!

[Photo credits: FilmMagic, Getty, Wireimage]

• SECRET OF THE OLSENS' SMILE? SAY 'PRUNE'! [MSNBC]

As it turns out, Katie and Suri picked an odd moment to make their escape. True, the pair were allowed to take tap dancing lessons together without supervision, but they were on the set of Tom's Other Child Connor's big break in (coincidence!) Cruise BFF Will Smith's new movie. And, as we can see, Tom hardly let his girls get very far before swooping in from his perch atop a trailer and distracting Suri with a pink bunny. Katie appears to put up a halfhearted fight for a moment, but Tom predictably wins the battle, removing Suri from her escape wagon and most likely, plucking that sippy cup from her little hands and crushing it with his famous air-punching fist.

[Photo credits: X17]

• SURI CRUISE MOVES FROM BOTTLE TO SIPPY CUP [Us]

"I was pouty when I was 16 or 17 and it's sort of stuck...It's when I'm nervous and my neck gets really really tense and then that pressure sort of squeezes up to my lips and they push out and there you go, that's the pout."

On nearly every red carpet, Keira refuses to reveal a single chomper, instead opting for the "pushed out lip" look she blames on nerves and tension. Understandably, flashbulbs and shouting fans would make us nervous, but after four years of major fame, wouldn't waltzing down the red carpet be a lesson learned way back in Fame 101?

And yes, her pout reappears in role after role. In each of the three Pirates flicks, that frown never leaves her face. And sure, fighting dead pirates and keeping your cool while filming scenes with the impossibly dreamy Johnny Depp would make us nervous too, but surely she could mix in the occasional smile. Can't her agent find her a good old-fashioned, Love, Actually type rom-com next? Or, at the very least, slip her a Valium or two before her upcoming red carpet appearances?

[Photo credits: Getty, IMDB, Wireimage]

• KEIRA KNIGHTLEY BLAMES NERVES FOR HER POUT [Starpulse]

"Before Harlow came along, Nicole never had to worry about anything. All she did was party with her friends and go shopping...can't figure out if she's happier when she's home with the baby or hitting the town with her friends..."

Even when Nicole was just Paris' merrily chubby sidekick in 2004 (at left), we get the feeling that's a genuine smile. Whether or not substances had anything to do with it, girl is happy. And despite looking thisclose to snapping in half, Richie grinned while prancing down the beach in those infamous bikini pictures taken pre-Joel and Harlow. Finally, caught up in her new relationship and frequenting the party circuit like no other, it's obvious Nicole was always happiest when photographers aligning the red carpet shouted her name.

Fast-forward to present times. Pregnancy is supposed to give you that "glow" or whatever, but as we can see at left, Nicole looked far from overjoyed. And as for her activities, club-going has been replaced by glumly shopping for wrapping paper with the fiance. And most recently, having dropped the baby weight and looking just as thin as she ever did, a smile still can't be forced. Truth be told? We actually miss the old Nicole just as much as she does.

[Photo credits: X17, Splash, Getty]

• NICOLE TORN BETWEEN OLD LIFE, MOTHERHOOD [MSNBC]