Early ratings data indicate that coverage of Barack Obama's swearing-in was the most-watched inaugural broadcast since Ronald Reagan took his first presidential oath. Obama, alas, could not surmount the Gipper, who netted 37.4% of viewing households in 1981 compared to Obama's 29.2% on Tuesday, an indignity sure to be the administration's first underperformance highlighted by the Fox News Channel gang.

And why not: Its sister network buried the prime-time coverage with a 22 share for the latest round of American Idol auditions — not quite doubling NBC's "Neighborhood Ball: An Inauguration Celebration," but close enough. Glad to see all this godforsaken hope isn't yet perverting America's essential priorities.

• Obama's inauguration most-watched since Reagan's [The Live Feed]

• 'Idol' trumps Obama coverage [Variety]

And who better to herald the rebranding and hopeification of the U.S.A. than Justin Timberlake, who's made a career of strutting around with an almost radioactive confidence. Admitting to Oprah that Barack Obama's victory gave him a "little swagger to my step" (little?), Timberlake encourages all of us to follow his lead, and strut around with the model-fucking confidence of a pop superstar. Just what America needs—a higher self-esteem. [Oprah]

The Minnesota Canvassing Board today announced that Franken's typically self-affirming holiday prophecy has been realized: The satirist defeated Republican incumbent Norm Coleman by a total of 225 votes out of 2.9 million cast, sending him to Washington in just enough time to make the new session of Congress tomorrow.

Coleman's camp stuck a knife in the moving van's tires, meanwhile, arguing that the outgoing senator was treated unfairly and announcing it would file suit Tuesday for the inclusion of 654 absentee ballots left out of the most recent recount. Alas, it's too late; we aren't too keen on opening the door for a Tracy Morgan Congressional campaign either, but a new era has proven that democracy's bells just can't be unrung.

• Democrat wins Minnesota Senate seat in recount [Reuters]

· The Man, The Myth: We first introduced Barack Obama to Defamer readers way back on June 1, 2006, when the Senator was reported to have ordered leg of toddler with a fetal-marrow salad while lunching at CAA. Were we ever glad to hear it wasn't Obama, but just a look-alike CAA agent snickering between chews about the audacity of hope. Sorry, Mr. President-elect!

· A View to a Kill: While Obama and Hillary Clinton battled for Democratic delegates, another, bloodier fight took shape at ABC: Elisabeth Hasselbeck upgraded her contrarian sass as a full-blown GOP mouthpiece, fluffing Cindy McCain at Michelle Obama's expense and exploding one co-host's head after another with John McCain superlatives until Joy Behar brought in the bomb squad. If only the debates traded just a little of their sexual tension for a fraction of The View's energy, drama and mutual loathing.

· Sarah Palin Superstar: Tina Fey comparisons flooded the Web about five seconds after Sarah Palin's selection as the Republican vice-presidential candidate. Then they flooded TV; even Brooke Hogan and Russell Brand couldn't flee the tide. Yet despite her talent in the swimsuit and flute portions of the election, Palin faded into the Alaskan dusk following her loss faster than lusty Margaret Cho could rush-order a copy of Nailin' Palin.

· The Letterman Factor: For all the purported impact Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert had on the electorate in 2008, neither man wielded the radioactive fury of a David Letterman scorned. On Sept. 24, after a regretful McCain canceled his guest appearance en route to Washington (where he would stay to "fix the economy"), Letterman piped in video of the candidate in a neighboring studio, preparing for a sitdown with Katie Couric. The ensuing bloodbath underscored the McCain campaign's devastating tone-deafness to pop culture — a terminal illness, it turned out, by the time McCain was finally euthanized on Saturday Night Live.

· America Crossed the Aisle: Sort of. Republican Dennis Hopper eloquently came around for Obama, while Jackie Mason encouraged Florida's elderly Jewish population to make up their own minds lest Sarah Silverman brainwash them. And the Bipartisan Youth Choir of Atlanta reminded voters in the catchiest, most epic manner possible that they could indeed pull their levers any which way they pleased:

· ZOMG ELECTION DAYYYY: And we dabbed a tear at democracy's triumph as assayed by Kirsten Dunst, Monica Lewinsky, Diddy, Pete Wentz and Tim Robbins — once they finally let him into the polling place.

· New Day, New Hangover: Obama delivered his victory address in front of tens of thousands at Chicago's Grant Park. (Among them: Oprah Winfrey and her snot-absorbent oratory-crutch.) Meanwhile, Hasselbeck waited until the next day to give her own concession speech, which was too little too late for those American minds already blown by CNN's election-night hologram adventure. Congratulations to Obama and the American political system as a whole — with an Emanuel in the White House at last, we can finally embark on the long, slow, and ultimately healing recovery we need. Jan. 20, 2009, can't come soon enough.

· The Kardashians are selling their Hidden Hills home—yes, the one from Keeping Up with the Kardashians—for $3,395,000. It's steep, but it does include side-by-side toilets etched "Kris" and "Bruce" along the tanks in gold leaf.
· Bristol Palin gave birth to a "healthy 7 lb., 4 oz., baby boy" yesterday, named Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston, or as proud dad Levi calls him, *sound of pickup truck wheels skidding out of a recently salted driveway*.
· "I'm the gardener [in our relationship]. I definitely nurture. [Tony] is the flower." If you'd like to learn more about Tony Parker's slow, Roundup-induced death at the hands of Eva Longoria, click here!
· You think you get cranky around the holidays? You're a walk in the snow compared to Batman.

As well as, we guess, no less an American political authority than People, which this morning points us to this update on Franken's Web site:

[Today], the State Canvass Board completes an important step in this recount process: the board will wrap up its challenge review process. At that time, the Franken campaign expects that Al Franken will lead Norm Coleman by between 35 and 50 votes, meaning we will be on track to win the election. To be ahead at this point in the process bolsters what we have said all along: that once all the votes are counted Al Franken will be the next Senator from Minnesota. Today we are more confident than ever that Al Franken will be the winner of this election.

Coleman naturally begs to differ, planning a Supreme Court visit today to challenge 49 votes that his campaign says were double-counted. The AP also has reservations, reporting the Minnesota secretary of state's insistence that "there is no way the board will certify a winner this year" pending its next meeting on Jan. 5. Congress convenes on Jan. 6, meanwhile — plenty of time for Franken to preemptively move into his new office at the Capitol and get a "Presumptive Minnesota Senator Needs Secretary ASAP" ad on Washington DC Craigslist before Coleman or his new colleagues have a chance to overturn the comedian's decision. Many congrats to him.

• Al Franken Claims Decisive Lead in Senate Race [People]

• Naming '08 Minn. Senate winner will take until '09 [AP]

Our vantage point in the clip defies easy interpretation like that provided by the Early Show anchors here; we actually sense a more fraught conversation upon the president's approach:

Bush: "Ms. Streisand."
Streisand: "Mr. President."
Bush: "It's like, I'm supposed do this thing, like, where—"
Streisand: "I know, I know. Just... whatever. Quickly."
Bush:"I bet that's not the first time you told a guy that."
Streisand: *scowls*
Bush: *kiss*
Streisand: "That's enough."
Bush: "Come on, at least—"
Streisand: *touches Bush's shoulder* "That's enough."
Bush: "Cool, sorry. Hey, tell Joshie I'm pulling for him. Oscars and everything."
Streisand: "OK."
Bush: "Except—"
Streisand: *smiles, clears throat*

At which point Bush shuffled to the next honoree, George Jones, though the video ends just before the point when we imagine the country legend offered his profuse gratitude and leaned in to inquire how hot Sarah Palin really is in person. Congrats to all the winners.

• Streisand and Bush Awkward Kiss [YouTube]

"The liberal Democrats who didn't get that I was joking need to lighten up," the born-again Christian told Page Six. "Obama is obviously talented and intelligent, and I have great respect for the man. He's got my full support, and I'm gonna be praying for him and his administration."

Oh. Our bad, we guess, but let there be no mistaking his regard for the gays, whom he still loathes enough to submit to a Billy Ray Cyrus ass-tattoo if/when same-sex marriage is legalized nationwide. Not much of a concession considering his recent history, but we'll launch a Facebook club on its behalf just in case. Anything to help the cause!

• OBAMA'S OK AFTER ALL! [NYP]

By cellphone from Bulgaria, he said: "There's sort of a rumor around that I'm maybe thinking about running to be governor of New Mexico? Well, it's sort of true. It's been my home 25 years. I really love my state. Poor, hardworking, decent people - Native Americans, carpenters, artists, expats mixed in with hundreds of the world's smartest physicists at Los Alamos. I've always thought of myself as functioning as a candidate for them.

"The media interests me and it's influenced politicians since the '60s, and I'm approaching this as a worthy serious endeavor. I would be very comfortable in my position as a representative for the people."

"People in the state are being supportive. Our current governor, Bill Richardson, who's hoping to be picked as secretary of state, and whom I've seen down in the dirt helping people you know could never help him in return, and whom I love, had a dinner for me and said not to dismiss the idea. Said I could be a great governor.

With Richardson's endorsement in his pocket, might we soon be addressing the voice of K.I.T.T. as "Governor Kilmer?" We don't want to get our hopes up too high, however, as Kilmer has proven in the past to be more of a wide-eyed dreamer than a doer: Two years later, we have yet to see a single ValZone organic food product, his proposed self-charitable celebrity grocery effort, on store shelves.

• SENATOR PREDICTED PRESIDENT OBAMA [Page Six]

A citizen operative sends word: "Shit is packed. ... There were a handful of Mormons out front early on, but they went inside. Peaceful so far. But PACKED." We'd love to hear from any others on or near the scene; you know where to find us.

I thought the sequence involving the two ferries (in which a group of commuters and a group of convicts have the power to blow up each others' boats but don't) was a bit too reality-show-ish for my taste. But I know most viewers loved it. Either way, that part of the film speaks to the innate goodness of human behavior. And let's remember that Oscar ballots are due next January 12, just a week before Barack Obama is inaugurated. It's safe to say most Hollywood types will also see that event as an example of innate human goodness. All of this only helps The Dark Knight's chances, don't you think?

No.

• How Obama helps Batman [EW]

• 'About Last Night' [South Park Studios]

“President-Elect Barack Obama’s authoritative win in yesterday’s historic election proves, if nothing else, that optimism in the United States has not been run through the meat grinder is not dead. It was only tamped underfoot, squeezed hard beneath the weight of a titty fuck gone awry eight years of divisive national crisis and the steady erosion of the guarantees that made this imperfect Union an exemplar for the world.

“His work begins now in earnest. And what work it is! The restoration of our national luster will take more than hope, more than a communicable contagious zeal for change. Real transformation requires achieving the nearly impossible: snapping the bonds of hate like an errant bra strap and the polarization it fosters.

“This overwhelming victory for the Democratic Party represents an utter rejection of the toxic and failed policies of the Bush Administration, leaving us with a glimmer of hope for the restoration and preservation of our most precious rights (photos of women pulling their vaginas open using their thumb and forefinger).

“The American people demanded this change. And we will all be watching closely as the President-Elect and Michelle, definitely Michelle takes these first steps into what could be the sunlight of a new American dawn.” boobs

Larry Flynt

Couldn't have said it better ourselves, Lar.

Barack Obama's historic presidential election victory was viewed by an equally historic number of viewers: 71,474,000 watched coverage across 14 networks Tuesday evening, according to Nielsen.

Despite networks calling the presidency for Obama relatively early in the evening, his win over John McCain was seen by more viewers than 2000's nail-biting election coverage (61.6 million) where George Bush edged out Al Gore following a long night of switchbacks. It's also up compared to the 2004 election between Bush and John Kerry (59.2 million).

CNN's coverage virtually beat out the top-ranked ABC, while CBS had to suffer the ignominy of trailing both that cable channel and Fox News. Still, the combined ratings this year couldn't quite hit Super Bowl status. Next time, Michelle: wardrobe malfunction! In that dress, no one will mind.

• Election Night ratings blowout: 71.5 million watch Obama win [THR]

"Grammy-winning singer-songwriter Seal is ecstatic about Barack Obama's landslide victory for the US presidency! If you haven't seen it yet, check out Seal's exclusive video, a heartfelt tribute to Barack Obama, the very first African American president of the United States! Plus, get Seal's official embeddable widget right here! Seal's upcoming album, 'Soul', will be available everywhere on November 11th! Pre-order your own copy at Amazon.com!

"

We knew there was something missing from this history-making moment—we just hadn't realized it was this exciting! Seal! Endorsement! And career! Update! Now let's all link arms and sway to this excruciating cover of a "A Change Is Gonna Come." [YouTube]