With the strike settled, and Gil Cates's beloved, four-hours-plus affair intact, the Academy Awards party circuit is showing signs of returning to its robust former self. To help you get your bearings after the disoriented circumstances of the last few months, Variety has laid all the Oscar-week parties and events on one, easy-to-read schedule. It's fine, but we've swapped in a few events we feel are more essential, and posted the final product above. If you haven't already, we'd suggest you start plotting your itinerary now, before you double-book and/or get your signals crossed, and wind up tanked and getting increasingly mouthy with an annoyed hostess at Cut.

• Six days of soirees [Variety]

Thanks to a generous tipster who took the time to send one in, we can now pass along the flyer to our readers. So take a minute, right now, to print it out and tape it to the door of your favorite studio or network executive; when he or she returns from a lunch that far exceeds your daily earnings, you'll share a much-needed laugh over your clever little prank, hopefully gaining at least a momentary break from the oppressive gloom that won't lift until the Guild and the AMPTP announce a deal that temporarily blunts the pain of being trapped in loveless, inescapable marriage.

• Previously: With Contract Deadline Looming, The WGA Dispatches Its Red-Shirt Army [Defamer]