Gawker: defamer, cops

Indian Police Drop Child-Selling Case, Rather Than Place Phone Call to England

Hamilton Nolan — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 09:35:24 EDT

The father of nine-year-old Slumdog Millionaire star Rubina Ali will not be charged with any crime for allegedly trying to sell her to undercover reporters for $300,000. Indian police couldn't track down the reporters.

It was always somewhat unclear what exactly went down in this case, and it seemed to boil down to a tabloid's word versus the word of the father, Rafiq Qureshi. So it's good to know the authorities WENT ALL OUT to get the testimony of every witness:

Police questioned Qureshi but were unable to track down the three journalists who carried out the alleged sting.

Officers looked for them at the Leela, a five-star hotel where the report said they met Qureshi but they had already left, Shaikh said.

Police traced two mobile phone numbers the trio gave the hotel to local Vodafone SIM cards, which were activated on April 16 and deactivated on April 19.

Indian police made no further efforts to contact the journalists or News of the World in England, Shaikh added.

Yep, they closed this case—which made headlines around the world—because they just couldn't get in touch with those News of the World reporters. Uh, did they try looking here?
[Pic via]

Seth Green Loves Cops From Coast To Coast

Douglas Reinhardt — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 13:45:55 EDT

Boomp3.com

Law enforcement-lover Seth Green took a moment out of his busy schedule to show his love for the girls and boys in blue in the Big Apple. The Sex Drive star has been a fan of the coppers ever since they found his missing bicycle a few months back. Green said, “I was already to go on Craigslist to look for a replacement, but then there was a knock on my door. I opened the door and there was Officer Smith holding my cherished Huffy ten speed. I was pretty down about it, but then like a ray of sunshine, Officer Smith warmed me up. We even busted some kids for skateboarding together.”

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Fox Tries To Help Us Avoid An Embarrassing 'Cops' Cameo

Mark — Tue, 04 Sep 2007 18:55:28 EDT

It's been months since the modest trickle of swag into Defamer HQ has yielded an item useful or interesting enough to survive longer than thirty seconds before finding its way into the trash can (seemingly each week, the UPS guy gets to hear our anguished cry of, "Fucking hell, another Mad TV screener? Is that show even still on?" before taking two steps backs towards the safety of his brown truck), but just moments ago, Fox delivered a winner to promote the 20th season of everyone's favorite shirtless-rednecks-denying-domestic-battery-accusations series: a keychain alcohol tester which, in the words of the enclosed note from the show's executive producer, "might prevent your being included in a COPS cameo." Finally, someone really gets us!

Unfortunately, thumbing through the device's badly translated instruction booklet has made us somewhat skeptical about its effectiveness for avoiding an unwanted appearance on the show (sample: "Precaution: When after drinking, it is recommended to last after 20 minutes, it is because 20 minutes is approximately for alcohol to be absorbed into blood from the digestive organs, and residual alcohol remaining in the mouth takes this long to dissipate," as well as an expected disclaimer freeing the manufacturer from legal liability); still, at the very least, the trinket should provide hours of enjoyment when we use it to measure our diminishing sobriety for any posts written after our customary late-afternoon chug from the Jim Beam bottle.

[Breathalyzer reading for this item: Yellow, but we neglected after drinking to last after 20 minutes.]

Official Cops website [Cops.com]
Defamer SwagWatch: The Deadly Silent Dummy [Defamer]