Horne, who thanks to their crack reportage we now know was a "torch singer/actress whose recording career spanned 70 years" and who "died today at age TK in location TK from cause TK," is—as far as we can tell—alive and well.

While we suppose it pays in today's lightning-speed electronic media environment to have all your potential celebrity obits lined up in a row, the flip-side of this kind of diligence is horrifying oversights like this one, living on in perpetuity thanks to the magic of the internets.

Is there a word for this kind of mistake? Typo seems somehow insufficient. Let's call it a deatho!

Shoulda been your accidentally published obit, Heigl.

• EW Online's Lena Horne Obit 'Oops!' [LAist]

Bea Arthur, who played Estelle Getty’s daughter on the show, tells INSIDE EDITION she’s been grieving for years over Getty’s long decline due to dementia, and could not deal with the emotion of a funeral.

Arthur: “She’s been out of it so many years, not recognizing anyone. It’s a Godsend. She’s at peace.”

Rue McClanahan, Getty’s former Golden Girls co-star who is living in New York, tells INSIDE EDITION that she couldn’t attend the funeral because she recently had surgery.

McClanahan: “I’d like them to know that I didn’t {attend the funeral} because I can’t fly right now with knee surgery. I don’t know why Betty and Bea didn’t go, maybe because they, too, have said their goodbyes to her when she was alive.”

For those keeping track, that leaves the whereabouts of dotty Rose Nylund—aka Bette White—unaccounted for, but once she's gotten a hold of, we're certain she'll have a delightful story about an ancient Viking funeral custom carried over into modern St. Olaf culture that requires you to skip your fellow warrior's services in favor of a cat-neutering rally in the Valley.

• Inside Edition

• Rest In Peace Estelle Getty [YouTube via The WOW Report]

Sophia : In Sicily, we never went to the doctor. We went to the Widow Scarpelli. Whatever you had, she had a cure for it.

Sophia : She was most famous for her green salve to cure earaches. One day, she gave some to Salvadore, the village idiot. He misunderstood the directions and put in on his pasta instead...The stuff tasted great, so Salvadore decided to market it. At first, things didn't go so well. Ear Salve on Pasta wasn't very appetizing-but once he changed the name to pesto sauce, it sold like hot cakes! Dorothy: Ma, you're making this up! Sophia : So what? I'm old, I'm supposed to be colorful.

Carlin was a social commentator, an aggravator, and an etymologist, but first and foremost, he was funny. The routine to which he'll be forever associated was "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television," (full text here), which wasn't necessarily his best, but would wind up getting him arrested in Milwaukee in 1972 on obscenity charges, instantly elevating the bit to the pantheon of Sacred Dangerous Comic Texts. The routine's airing on New York radio would later be cited by the U.S. Supreme Court in a 1978 ruling on FCC broadcast fines. No reactionary comic could ever have asked for more.

Gawker collects seven memorable monologues, including "Seven Words," rightly observing that there would be no Lewis Blacks or Bill Mahers—or Bill Hickses, for that matter—without Carlin. But for us at least, it was in his simplest observations about language—such as in this classic bit above contrasting the blithe terminology of baseball to football's inherent fascism (parks vs. stadiums, caps vs. helmets, ups vs. downs)—where his true genius was on display.

• How George Carlin Changed Comedy [time.com]
• George Carlin mourned as counterculture hero [AP]

• Pledge to Hedley Lamarr [YouTube]
• 'Carol Burnett' star Harvey Korman dies at 81 [AP]

For unknown reasons, the bear lunged at 39-year-old Stephan Miller, a trainer at Randy Miller's Predators in Action, about 3 p.m. and bit him in the neck, said sheriff's spokeswoman Cindy Beavers. [...]

She added that officials from Cal OSHA and the state Department of Fish and Game were investigating, and it was not immediately known what would happen to the bear. [...]

Fish and Game spokesman Harry Morse said its patrol chief knew of no safety violations at Predators in Action. He said the department's main task with such companies is to make certain the animals are well treated.

"This is a commercial venture," he said of Predators in Action. "It's part of the entertainment industry."

The video above, which we stumbled upon on YouTube, shows the victim's cousin Randy (who played Ferrell's stunt-double) rehearsing the wrestling scene with Rocky. It gives a good indication of the size and power we're talking about here, where one mini-tantrum—perhaps set off after showing up to set to learn some gaffer has grabbed the last flopping, whole salmon from the craft services table—can lead to deadly results.

• Show biz grizzly kills trainer at Southern California animal facility [LAT]

Try, if you can, to tune out the grating commentators speculating as to Ledger's state of mind when he made this, and instead focus of the gorgeous "Dog" melody (so named for Winston Churchill's famous description of depression), and Heath's haunting, black and white visual accompaniment. The final scene, which they deem "too graphic for us to broadcast," reportedly depicts Ledger drowning himself in a baththub. Once you're done watching, we then suggest you hang out with these furry BFFs for a little while.

• A Current Affair AUS
• Heath Ledger's Video For Nick Drake Song: Eerie Postscript To Actor's Death [MTV]

• Star of 'Jaws' and 'All That Jazz' [LAT]

Estate executor Howard K. Stern, meanwhile—whom you may or may not remember ignoring a child's pleas not to exploit a drug-addled Smith for a zombie-clown video—tells ET he's established the Anna Nicole and Daniel Wayne Smith Charitable Foundation: "It will benefit charitable causes that Anna Nicole supported during her life: children, the elderly, and the treatment and cure of AIDS. Hopefully it will grow, help more people each year, and eventually be headed by her daughter Dannielynn," an exciting possibility we're sure will come to pass just as soon as Birkhead figures out how to take a fair cut of whatever Stern's pulling off the bottom line.

• Foundation Pays Tribute to Anna Nicole [ETOnline]

By the [day after Ledger's death], a man claiming to be Kim Ledger managed to get Cruise on the phone, a source said.

Over the next few days, he "had had a couple of conversations with" Cruise, asking for emotional support, said the source. But Cruise abruptly cut him off when he learned "he was an impostor," the source said. "Heath's reps found out there was this hoaxer and they called various celebs." Sources close to Cruise confirmed the impostor contacted him.

Travolta publicist Samantha Mast said, "John spoke with the guy briefly before he realized he was an impostor. He did not make arrangements to buy him a plane ticket." But a source said Travolta, who had been "making arrangements to buy [the impostor] a plane ticket from Australia to LA and subsequently to New York."

Realizing the death of a fellow A-lister was the tragic-accident equivalent of a 28-car pileup on a rain-slicked freeway, the cruel impostor's grift was slyly calculated to take full advantage of Cruise and Travolta's lifelong pledge to good Scientological samaritanism. It's to their credit that both actors lept to his aid, erring on the side of gullibility, rather than first insisting the voice on the other end of the line be subjected to a personality test intake exam and e-meter reading, just to verify his stress-levels matched those of an authentically grieving parent.

• SICKO POSES AS HEATH'S FATHER [NY Post]

[WB marketing head Sue] Kroll will likely have to move quickly to rejigger the studio's current phase of the marketing campaign for "Dark Knight," focusing on Ledger's Joker character. This phase of the campaign had been set to run until March.

Knight isn't the first superhero blockbuster marketing campaign to suffer from unanticipated tragedy: Besides The Crow, we're reminded of that circa 9-11 Spider-Man teaser in which goalpost Twin Towers trapped a getaway chopper in the web-slung net suspended between them. But that was a standalone spot, easily pulled from theaters and the final cut without affecting the rest of the movie. Excising Ledger from the campaign, already aggressively positioned by the studio as the showy villain centerpiece of the Batman Begins sequel, would be a far dicier proposition. We can only hope director Christopher Nolan doesn't, in a moment of grief-induced panic, cave to the studio's suggestions that he write in an 11th hour Robin, then roll out a far less ominous second-phase campaign built entirely around re-shoots featuring Zac Efron in the iconic red, green, and yellow costume.

• Fate of Ledger's last films uncertain [Variety]