While appearing on last night's Tonight Show, a wary Duchovny did his damnedest to avoid any potentially tumescent lines of conversation, yet every time he backed away, he found himself stepping into a new pile of "that's what she said"-level innuendo. Of particular interest to Jay Leno (and Tea Leoni's lawyers) was the onetime designation of Duchovny as "head boy," a one-innocent schoolboy title that loses some of its rakish flavor each time a 48-year-old Duchovny uses it at the craft services table to open up a double entendre-filled conversation with a hot background extra named "Misty." [The Tonight Show]

It was not [Duchovny's] 'sexual compulsion proclivity' that caused the break-down of their marriage, but rather his discovery of explicit text messages on [Leoni's] mobile phone sent by actor Billy Bob Thornton.

Through the texts Duchovny found out she had begun a relationship with Oscar-winning actor Billy Bob Thornton, 53, who was formerly married to Angelina Jolie.

Five-times married Billy Bob met Téa when they made a comedy film together earlier this year called Manure.

Thornton, a musician with his own band, has been seen with Téa at his gigs.

'She even helps him load and unload his truck,' says a friend of the couple.

What gives, Mulder? After all the nubile background players you've shown your X-Files to, can't your wife enjoy some groupie action with Angelina Jolie's sloppy seconds? Yes, the stench of patchouli and Wild Turkey that would emanate from even a text message might be hard to take, but you made your bed, David. Now lie in it (and without that cute 20-year-old PA who "really loved you in Trust the Man").

[Photo Credit: AP]

• Sex addict David Duchovny splits from wife Téa Leoni after discovering HER 'illicit affair' with Billy Bob Thornton [Daily Mail]

Dean Winters
Role on Sex: Carrie's fuck buddy John McFadden. After her second massive break from big, Carrie attempts to make her fuck buddy John into a real boyfriend. This attempt fails miserably.
Where Is He Now: Since his hard time in Carrie, Dean Winters moved on to greener pastures: he has a recurring role as Liz Lemon's hilariously deadbeat boyfriend on 30 Rock, Dennis "the beeper king" Duffy. He also has a recurring role on Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.

John Slattery
Role on Sex: Bill Kelley, an up-and-coming politician and total silver fox. His relationship with Carrie fizzles because he's obsessed with golden showers.
Where Is He Now: As silvery and foxy as ever, John plays slimy-yet-handsome ad exec Roger Sterling. He also had a recurring role on Desperate Housewives, but our hearts belong to Roger.

David Duchovny
Role on Sex: Carrie's erstwhile high school boyfriend Jeremy. He lives in Denver, but has taken a trip out East so he can go to a mental institution. His relationship with Carrie is a no-go because of his mental fragility, but that did not preclude them from knocking the boots a couple times.
Where Is He Now: We all know that David stars as a sex addict on the acclaimed Showtime dramedy Californication and also in his actual life. He was already a bona fide TV star before his time on Sex, but perhaps his time in Carrie-land inspired him to take the more emotionally complex role of Hank Moody on Californication.

Craig Bierko
Role on Sex: Creepy jazz-obsessed Ray King. Things do not work out with Carrie because he can barely hold a conversation that doesn't involve music.
Where Is He Now: earlier this year, Craig starred in a Fox sitcom called Unhitched with Rashida Jones. He played Jack 'Gator' Gately, a 35-year-old who recently divorced his college sweetheart. He is back in the dating scene and totally clueless. Even though it was produced by There's Something About Mary scribes Bobby and Peter Farrelly, the show was canceled after six episodes. However, we know that Carrie holds a leprauchan-ish pot of gold between those gams of hers, so we have high hopes that Craig's TV career will rebound in the near future!

• Californication [Showtime]

He said Tea gave him an ultimatum: "Get treatment or our marriage is over," a source told the tab, which is riding high after getting former presidential candidate John Edwards to admit his tomcattin'.

"At first, Duchovny tried to lie his way out of trouble, but eventually was overwhelmed with guilt and confessed," The Enquirer contends.

US Weekly concurs that Duchovny, 48, "has a history of indiscretions," according to "multiple sources." The mag claims he put the moves on an extra on his Showtime hit, "Californication." "They ended up making out," alleges a source. "She later heard this wasn't the first time he'd taken special interest in an extra."

Since checking in for a 35-day course at the Meadows rehab center in Wickenburg, Ariz., Duchovny has been visited by his supportive wife, who has been forced to scratch promotional appearances for her new comedy, "Ghost Town."

There's no telling how much of Duchovny's five-week sex rehab stint has yet to be completed, but we suppose if he had to dry out somewhere, "Wickenburg, Arizona" sounds as good a place as any. Still, we wonder if this presages a drop in deep background eye candy when Californication returns for its second season. Should sex-addicted novelist Hank Moody find his way to the Playboy Mansion, will the grotto be filled not with Playboy bunnies but with first-round casting rejects from Lifetime's Fat Friends?

• Cheat sheet found in David Duchovny's Sex Files [NY Daily News]

In 1997, the actor denied rumors that he himself was a sex addict.

"I'm single and I had a long-term girlfriend up until last November," Duchovny told Playgirl magazine. "I have been seen with more than one woman in the last few months, so I'm an easy target for those kind of things."

He continued "I'm not a sex addict. I have never been to those meetings. It's hurtful to my family and if I was involved with a woman in a monogamous relationship, it would be hurtful to her. There was another story claiming I was a neat freak. If I had to choose one of the two, I think I'd rather be a sex addict."

It appears Duchovny chose unwisely, though he'll certainly be raking in awkward, free promotion when Californication returns for its upcoming second season. While we're sure the actor regrets the damage done to his family (as well as that suddenly damaging, soul-baring interview to Playgirl — but they were so friendly!), we can't say we're that surprised. After all, this is the man who sullied the polite tradition of tea time forever by posing with a cup covering areas that only Dana Scully is meant to investigate. If the truth is out there, we really shoulda seen this coming.

• David Duchovny Enters Rehab for Sex Addiction [Us]

Now, reports THR ESQ, the Chili Peppers are suing:

The Peppers don't claim Federal trademark infringement. Instead they allege state law claims of unfair competition, dilution of value of the "Californication" mark and unjust enrichment.

"Californication is the signature CD, video and song of the band's career, and for some TV show to come along and steal our identity is not right," band frontman Anthony Kiedis says [in a press release].

One would have thought that at least one clearance report red flag might have gone up alerting the network to the possibility of legal troubles down the line should they have chosen to borrow Kiedis's coinage without paying for the privilege. Still, faced with the series's rather cumbersome original working title of Midlife Crisis Featuring Bitter, Boozy Writer Who Gets Barrels of Pussy in an Improbable L.A. Teeming With Hot Bookworm Groupies, we can understand how they might have perhaps too hastily chosen to go with the far catchier one-word moniker.

• Red Hot Chili Peppers Sue Showtime over 'Californication' Title [THR ESQ]

Even so, a lot of people in the industry don't buy the idea that some films require actors to engage in the real thing. Scott Winant, a director of the Showtime series "Californication," which also uses sex as a narrative device, said that what makes the scene is the emotions conveyed in the acting, not the act. Real sex, he said, "doesn't necessarily communicate the emotion of the sexual moment. It's more effective to work with great actors who can identify with a sexual moment through the acting."

We're sure that Winant wasn't referring specifically to the Tell Me cast, who altogether seem more than capable of identifying with a sexual moment even with a director interrupting them with notes like, "Hey, Adam, would you mind shifting to the right just a touch? We're really going to lose our sense of the emotional truth of you desperately trying to knock up Sonia if that shadow obscures your balls. Thanks, buddy, now back to the boning, you're really in a groove there"; he was merely demonstrating pride in the performances on his own show, where seasoned vets like Evan Handler prove each week that they don't need to actually show their areolas being yanked off during a nipple-clamp mishap to have the scene resonate with a realism-craving audience.

• It Isn't a Real Sex Scene? I Still Need a Cigarette [NY TImes]
• Previously: Sexagenarians Finally Get To Shut Up And Screw On 'Tell Me You Love Me' [Defamer]