Unlike with Sarah Palin's emails, there's not really a public-spirited reason to post the screenshots the hackers took, except, of course, pure voyeurism. The detail-by-detail, appointment-by-appointment depiction of the lifestyle of a rich and famous actress is all engrossing stuff for the masses (and for us). And yet it feels oddly unsatisfying — the same drip, drip, drip of minutiae that the Internet famous overshare on blogs and Twitter.

Screenshots of the shayek@mac.com email account, released by habitués of the online bulletin board 4chan, appear to be authentic. Breaking into the account was a simple matter of knowing Hayek's birthday — September 2 — and guessing at her security word (they claim it was the name of her best known movie role) to reset the account's password. Public-records searches show that the 323-area-code phone number Hayek listed in a sent email belongs to the actress. A spokeswoman for Hayek has not returned a call requesting comment.

The glimpses into Hayek's life revealed by her inbox are fascinating, even if mundane: The stranger-suckling actress has been invited to America Ferreira's 25th birthday party. She downloads a bunch of iPhone applications from the iTunes App Store — and she gets spam from Apple, just like the rest of us. As for the perks of being famous, a driver was scheduled to meet her flight arriving in Abu Dhabi. American Express has given her a new Gold card. (What, she doesn't rate the exclusive black Centurion Card?) Balenciaga and Stella McCartney deliver designer clothes to her apartment. She schedules "Japanese face massages." And she gets scans of stories about her in the celebrity weeklies.

Boomp3.com

Mac Guy Justin Long took a moment out of his undoubtedly busy schedule to chat up with a couple of Mac fanatics over the weekend. The friendly females gushed over Long's performance in Waiting before launching in a diatribe against the iPhone 3G and all of its problems. Long told the ladies that he had no control over that and admitted that he was having problems as well. Looking to change the topic, Long ran his fingers through his hair, which accidentally created a trigger effect with his female fans. Thinking he may have stumbled onto a Pied Pieper like ability, Long then ran his fingers through his mane one more time to see if the women would once again follow suit. He was crushed to learn that it was a one-time only occurence.

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

The good news: You can wait and watch Made of Honor on your iPod in about three months! The bad news: It'll cost you $14.99 to download it. (Or $9.99 three months after that.) And for digital media that costs exactly nothing to reproduce, package or distribute, we think that amounts to little more than information highway robbery. And just in time for the studios to stonewall SAG on new-media revenues!

Or maybe they're not quite connected — yet. Conceding it would get paid for new media when studios got paid, the WGA settled its strike in February by negotiating for roughly 2% of studios' online grosses each year through 2011. But in an earnings call yesterday, Time Warner CEO Jeff Bewkes cited a 60%-70% profit margin during a VOD trial for Warner Bros. films on cable — more than twice the return on Time Warner DVD rentals. It's anyone's guess how that shakes out in terms of purchases, but with DVD sales last quarter at $3.5 billion, and with a fairly clear break between online and traditional media consumers, even a tenth of that revenue online would be enough for SAG president/time-bomb Alan Rosenberg to reinforce the hard line as the first round of negotiations come to a close Friday.

Moreover, as an observant tipster pointed out to us this morning, the markup on these downloads is pretty obscene, maybe even illegal. After piracy concerns were allayed in the last year, pricing was the only remaining sticking point for Apple — which wanted to keep purchases at $10 — and studios, which compromised at $15. Albums on iTunes cost an average of 40% less than their CD counterparts; but with online retailers and box stores pressuring DVD prices below $20, why should they get away with a difference as little as 15% in some markets — especially with no extra features or deluxe packaging? The courts have even addressed this before, but it usually applies to manufacturers complaining about suppliers, not the other way around. Someone! Get the FTC on the line!

• Purchase New Movies on iTunes [Apple]

· Juno is officially the biggest sorta-indie movie success since My Big Fat Greek Wedding, boding not well for CBS's planned sitcom, How I Was Conceived By My Mother, which picks up where the action left off. [Variety]
· Summit Entertainment is pinning its hopes on Twilight, a vampire movie with "strong elements of a high-school romance," (read: One Bat Hill, The O-Positive C, Gossip Ghoul...OK, we'll stop.) [THR]
· Ryan Phillippe falls into Ari Emanuel's firm-yet-tender embrace, and signs with Endeavor, fully sold on their partners' passionate, "Soon they'll be calling her the ex-Mrs. Phillippe!" platform. [THR]

• Apple's "1984" ad
• Monster.com from 1999
• CareerBuilder.com from 2005
• GoDaddy from 2005
• Xerox from 1977
• E*Trade from 1999
• Pets.com from 2000
• Computer.com from 2000
• SalesGenie.com from 2007
• OurBeginnings in 2000

· The High School Musical gang has signed on for another sequel, High School Musical 3: Senior Year, which will escape from the basic cable ghetto to premiere in theaters. [Variety]
· Celine Dion: That's Just the Woman in Me, a special taped Saturday at the Wiltern will air Feb. 15 on CBS. We realize this isn't a groundbreaking announcement, but it did provide a nice excuse to run that ridiculous photo. [Variety]