Gawker: defamer, ad wizards

Bold Starz Campaign Insists You Will Hate The Lindsay Lohan Film Airing Saturday

STV — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 12:00:00 EDT

There's no denying Lindsay Lohan's "thriller" I Know Who Killed Me was among the most critically and commercially reviled B-movies of last year — of any year, really. But now that IKWKM is approaching cable oblivion with its premiere June 14 on Starz, we doubt our inbox has ever seen a publicity campaign this wonderfully defensive or reactionary — almost Warholesque in its celebration of its own product's awfulness, proudly emphasizing its Razzie Award cred and critical pull quotes exhorting viewers to check out "a disaster that exerts a perverse fascination" (Variety) or "the monumental trashiness of this mess" (NY Daily News).

While we're loathe to plug the film (in fact, we would sooner piss in our own mouths than watch it again) or its network, we acknowledge the vague intrigue of Lohan's pseudo-twin/stripper/victim antics among the IKWKM cultists out there. Here's hoping the torpedoed likes of Speed Racer and The Happening find this kind of love in their own pay-cable afterlives, perhaps on Starz soon-to-be-introduced sister channel Flopz.

I Know Who Killed Me [Starz]

Harrison Ford And The Kingdom Of The Crystallized Chest Wax

Molly Friedman — Wed, 21 May 2008 13:15:00 EDT

With all the magnetized baked potatoes and dancing chihuahua sequences in store in this weekend’s Indy 4, it’s no surprise Harrison Ford’s next on-screen project is as simple and easy to understand as possible. As we noted weeks ago, Ford was filming spots for an environmental group that prompted him to step in as copywriter and retool the scripts. And thank goodness he did — who else could have come up with this illuminating dialogue between the grizzly manscaping actor and, well, himself? Apparently, even big boys like Ford wince when hair is ripped from their shiny manly chests using hot wax. And that’s how the environment feels. So get thee to the nearest beauty parlor, shoot the unsmiling waxer a charismatic flirty smirk or two, and save the planet already.

Even more unnerving than what the group's CEO promises was a totally real expression on Ford's face when the hair came off (frankly we can't spot an "expression" throughout the whole clip) is the sight of Ford's jolting asymmetrical features. It's as if George Lucas announced he would shoot only the right side off the actor's face for Indy 4 and proceeded to slap him 50 times a day in order to shove all his features over to the right. All the better to disguise his smirking from the hair-ripping minx on his left.

HARRISON FORD WAXES HIS CHEST — FOR A GOOD CAUSE [People]

Harrison Ford Pulls An Ed Norton, Demands Rewrites On A Pro-Bono Ad Campaign

Molly Friedman — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 17:10:00 EDT

When it comes to celebrity endorsements, Harrison Ford isn't exactly known for splashing his chiseled face across billboards shilling for shower gels and cell phones (Japanese beer, as you'll see after the jump, is whole 'nother story). But according to Mediabistro, Ford recently agreed to partner with powerhouse advertising agency BBDO to develop a series of environmentally angled ads. And, apparently, Ford's developed a case of the Nortons:

"He's finicky about scripts, mainly because he's so concerned about his voice and face being attached to the project...He's apparently so finicky that his demanded changes completely decimated a scheduled shoot in Latin America to get the campaign rolling."

This ad that Harrison shot for Kirin Beer sometime in the early `90s is the most disturbing celebrity endorsement we've seen since Diddy proclaimed his love for Proactiv. And after watching this monstrosity, we're left even more puzzled as to why Ford would give this oddball the thumbs-up but is fighting with the well-respected creative house BBDO over a series of spots to promote the least controversial cause of the moment. Sounds to us like ole Harrison might need some more green before he goes green.

HARRISON FORD...COPYWRITER? [AgencySpy]