How the hell is this possible pic.twitter.com/5JWD1g7XVy
— Alex Goldman (@AGoldmund) January 28, 2015
Boys! Some of you are upset because you have heard that there is going to be a Ghostbusters movie made in which the job of busting ghosts, a traditional bastion of masculinity, will be done by women. How can women wear jumpsuits and chase noncorporeal beings? You've seen the movie and you know that's man stuff. How are they going to have that awkwardly homoerotic subtext about "crossing the streams" (urine flow) from their "proton packs" (penises)? Will they have to shoot their proton streams sitting down? Does no one respect your childhood?
Guess what? If it matters that much to you: The Ghostbusters of your childhood will still be men! You can still watch them. No one is taking the hit 1984 movie Ghostbusters, in which men do battle with ghosts, out of circulation. They are not even withdrawing Ghostbusters II, which was crapola.
This is not a "Han shot first" situation, in which people who want to watch the true and accurate and beloved 1977 movie Star Wars have to put in some effort to find a non-enhanced, non-revised original theatrical edition. George Lucas genuinely believes his namby-pambified and CGI-bloated subsequent treatments of Episode IV: A New Hope are superior to the original movie, and he has pushed the real thing off the market.
But the owners of Ghostbusters are not CGI-ing away Bill Murray and pasting in Kristen Wiig. They are making a whole separate movie, which you are free not to watch. Your Ghost-boy-sters are, like the ghosts they chase, undead and undying; your childhood is intact. Though you should consider growing up.